Last one to post wins

[Snow White's Mother]

Has anyone seen my daughter? I have some fresh baked apple pies for her.

[Pulg]

I have not seen her. I have important matters to attend to.

Vintage Cheddar.

[Pulg's Fairy Trombone Orchestra]

Rich, velvety mids, with a piquant yet mellow top-end. The salt crystals add zing and penetration to a tone that might otherwise be inaudible in ensemble.

[Pulg]

Stilton.

[Pulg's Fairy Trombone Orchestra]

Extraordinarily vibrant, without ever becoming harsh or brash. However, the blue mould reacts oddly with the brass, and now We are surrounded by multicoloured seas of protoplasm and hordes of glowing, carnivorous doughnuts, all singing Flemish nursery rhymes in Ted Cruz's voice.

[Pulg]

Wensleydale.

[Pulg's Fairy Trombone Orchestra]

Disappointing. Muffled and indistinct, with a remarkably poor bass response, and preserving very little of the original tone of the instrument. On the plus side, if you breathe in hard when it's in, you can inhale quite big bits.

[Pulg]

Cottage cheese.

[Pulg's Fairy Trombone Orchestra]

No.

[Dr. Albert W. Wily]

*Appears from out of nowhere.*

Where on earth did I just go? I don't remember anything!

*Sees AM TARDIGRADE sporting a great moustache.*

That's one fine bit of facial hair you've got, AM TARDIGRADE!

*Gives AM TARDIGRADE a thumbs up in approval.*

[Pulg]

Super. In that case, the winner of the 2021 Cheese Trombone Mute Trials is Vintage Cheddar, a classic for a reason. I shall now set forth to search for Snow White.

[AM TARDIGRADE]

*returns Dr. Wily's thumbs-up - having sprouted rudimentary thumbs from its uppermost claws - then devours him and assimilates his DNA AGAIN*

GLOOOOORRRRPMPPPHHH!!!

...

...

...

*acquires a weaponized, rideable jackhammer this time; go figure*

[Spenser Quixote]

Pulg wrote:

I shall now set forth to search for Snow White.

HUZZAH!!! A passing noble QUEST, straight from THE STORRIIIIIEEESSSS!!!

Let us ride forth forthwith, valiant lummox!

[Lot]

*ANGRY GRUNT*

*bucks and bridles*

[Spenser Quixote]

Por quois??! Nay, and forsooth, mein valiant sinew-carriage, I didst nyet mean THEE!

[Lot]

*grrrumbbble....*

*steals Pulg's Stilton, then raids Dr. Wily's refridgerator for a beer*

*glikglikglikglikglik....*

[Spenser Quixote]

*appears suddenly oblivious as all this goes on literally right underneath him, lost in some reverie as he looks around him in wonder...*

[Pulg]

Spenser Quixote wrote:

Pulg wrote:

I shall now set forth to search for Snow White.

HUZZAH!!! A passing noble QUEST, straight from THE STORRIIIIIEEESSSS!!!

Let us ride forth forthwith, valiant lummox!

Well, alright, providing you don't go tilting windy moles again.

[Comte de Malodor]

Fish-Malkovich wrote:

That's odd, I could've sworn that they did call it the Misery Stick for nothing!

Oh no. Whenever I ask her to call it that, she charges me an extra £20.

[Count Reiner Heydrich]

*Laughs at Comte de Malodor's misfortune.*

You, my friend, are a self opening pinata! Truly, you are a gift!

*Spies a camel raiding Dr Wily's fridge for a beer.*

I'm afraid that you won't find any alcohol in there. Dr Wily only drinks brandy, and even then it's a special batch, but it was all drunk by some rather careless bricks. However, I do have some aged port, it's almost as old as I am!

[Wild Triceratops]

*Charges on scene yet again, all disoriented and exhausted, bellowing in rage.*

*Lowers head and starts jutting it's horns aggressively.*

[Dr. Albert W. Wily]

*Reappears from out of nowhere once more.*

If I'm going on more of these weird trips, I'm gonna have to start sending postcards!

*Quickly notices Wild Triceratops acting defensively.*

Uh oh, I think it could gore! I think that it's about to gore!

[The when]

Brandy didn’t want to get drunk, so she slugged Dr. Wily. Pulg seems to have left that bit out.

[An observation]

Dr Robotnik > Dr. wiley.

[Vampire Schism]

Dr. Albert W. Wily wrote:

*Quickly notices Wild Triceratops acting defensively.*

Uh oh, I think it could gore! I think that it's about to gore!

Goring is okay.

Its the splattering of blood that goes everywhere that is the problem.
Such a waste.

[Gremlins from the Kremlin]

An observation wrote:

Dr Robotnik > Dr. wiley.

This is fact - ALL 'niks is good 'niks!

On other hand, 'Wiley' means 'coyote'...'coyote' means 'west'...and 'West' means CAPITALISTLIBERALFASCISTBOURGEOISIEGENTRYSUBVERSIVEOPPRESSIVEALLYENEMYPIGDO GS!!!

[Wild Triceratops]

*Bellows fiercely before charging into Gremlins from the Kremlin, goring them horribly.*

*Then proceeds to charge at Vampire Schism, impaling her on the horns.*

[Waterhammer]

Smurfs arrive singing happy songs. Soon Wild Triceratops becomes smurfy triceratops…

[Schism]

KILL KILL KILL!!!!

[Vidmaster7]

Smurf.

[Partylf Sunev]

Food!

nom nom nom

[Wild Triceratops]

*Becomes startled by all the tiny, blue things running around.*

*Goes even more berserk with fright, charges yet again and gores the next poster.*

[The when]

*Hovers in the air, just out of reach beyond the edge of a cliff*

If you were a mallard you could fly.

*Plop.*

Nope, not a mallard…

[Pulg]

Feed the triceratopses.

Tuppence a smurf

Tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a smurf.

[Wild Triceratops]

*Awakes on a ledge on the cliff face.*

*Bellows in confusion and pain.*

*Once rested up a bit, finds a small path to climb down the cliff.*

[Vidmaster7]

I think it has cleared out now.

[Pulg]

That's just as well. Today's KNOWLEDGE BLAST comes to courtesy of the Pulgy Pulger Weiner Corporation, and it is that dinosaurs, like furbies, are NOT kosher, which means we shall have to look elsewhere for tonight's feast.

[Wild Triceratops]

*Rests peacefully in a glade, eating the delicious greenery.*

*Meanwhile, posters are being set up by an unknown figure promising a large cash sum of money in exchange for the capture of the triceratops (with it also being stated that the triceratops is to be alive and healthy).*

[crab7]

*clack*

[Pulg]

What's that, crab7? You have a Cunning Plan to capture the dinosaur?

[Schism]

Be wery wery kwiet; I'm hunting triceratops!

[Waterhammer]

With smurfs.

[Schism Hag]

ZAP!

One less creepy blue thing.

[Skiron]

*SHRIVEEEELLLLLLLL!*

One -fewer- creepy RED thing *giggle*!

[John Hammond, Jurassic Park CEO]

Excellent, with people capturing the triceratops for me (because anyone will do anything for money) I can focus on stocking the gift shop full of souvenirs, hiring the best chefs for the café and bribing all those who would stop my money making ambitions!

[Pulg's Fairy Monkeyboard Trio]

Sir, may we take a moment to say how very much we admire your organ?

[John Hammond, Jurassic Park CEO]

Depends on the type of organ, and how much money you have.

[Skiron]

Ahhhh-hee-hee-hee-hee, JUST THE THING!

*deftly decaptitates lead fairymonkey with a backstroke from an obsidian dagger, takes said head and runs it through a laminator before affixing it atop a canopic jar filled with a set of nearly-fresh lungs - WHOSE lungs remains unclear*

[Vidmaster7]

So uh the trike escaped to my thread...

[Pulg's Fairy Operatic Tenor]

BUHORN FRRREEEE, AS FRREE AS THE WEEEND BLOWWWWS...