Bobthe Giant's page

""Meath'd should've come along and not have girrly friend on brain." This would be a treasure trove for the ogre.

Say it brudda! Me widdle girl in Wefcrown is so pretty! Me protekt citee fo 'er!

Epil..Epiloo..Epi..DAT STUFF DAT COMES AT THE END!

Bob hid in da shadows and watched the big scary boat men say dat dey would let the humies decide what to do wif Wescrown. Dat was good. Bob though the whole city would get burned down. So many humies! Bob knew he coldn't beat dem all.

Bob wondered what he should do. He knew waza big giant and humies never would want him in da city. But he wuved the widdle Andrea, how could he help?

Bob suddenly knew! Bob knew dat there werestill lotsa theefs and even some devels in da city. Plus dere will alwayz be theefs and nasties. So Bob would protect da city for Andrea! Bob heard dat she would become cheiftess. So he would be dat..whazzat. Axeguy? Yea! He would roam da streets at night, the club of justice! Where evil shows it's face, it will get a big ole club! Haha! So Bob mad ehimself a big cloak and hat of rat skin, because he knew criminals were a bunch scardy cats and a supic..supics...Dey be araid of ratss! He would be ratman, the terror dat squeeks in da night!

I AM RATMAN! THE TERROR THAT SQUEAKS IN THE NIGHT!

Uh-huh! we do good! I smash theefs! I smash shadoos! I make city safe for my wuv!

Moar bad stuff wuz happening! Bob heard lots of fighting going on! He heard something about a big statue and lotsa devilz. So he thunk that dat where wuz he had to go.

He knew that dis a big ting, his bozz said dat da big army wus coming. Bob knew hadda do somethink.

Bob had been getten better since dat time in da forest. He bashed people around! He got tough! He lifted rocks!

He needed idea though, he knew dat da thiefs were a suspic..suspi.suspi.. A buncha scardy catz who were afraid da dark! Bob needed idea to make dem all scared of him! Need idea.

Squeak!

Bob looked down and saw a rat scurying along da gutter...and he suddenly knew...He must become..da rat!

Bob had known that big nasty stuffs was happenin in the city. The guy from the north end who had Bob smash heads for him had said a buncha thieves was trying to get control.

Bob had seen lotsa fighten and fires, humies and spikey things called devils. He wondered what was gunna happen.

Bob's boss had said some skinny undead guy wanted to hire him. Bob saw this real fancy-pomfy blood sucker yelling about how some adventuers had ran him from his home. Bob figgured bloodsucker wanted Bob to smahs!

Then he told Bob who they were, Bob kinda remembered them from way back when they were fighten in the forest and got kinda worried. Then he talked about HEr! His wuv! He said he wanted her brought to him to sug=ffer..CALLED HER A WHORE!

Bob was smart tho, he knew just wat to do and nodded his head and went "yarp,smash!" Waited under bloodsucker turned his back..

Bob was smart and snealky! He Bashed him right in da skull! HAHAHAHAH! Den Bob kicked him outside, he knew the shadowbeasts and walkin dead hated sun! So he wrapped his arms around and went into da bright sun!

Bob got burned, maybe Bob shudda let go. Ow...

But Bob can't hang around! He gotta help her!

Me squish all da enemies!

Ohnonono! Why?! Why did that happen?

I mean, we snuck down all quiet into dat pit and dere was the mayor house dat Herbert said people were goin into so we squeezed all in and wuz gunna find mah darlin.

BUT DEN BAD THINGS HAPPENED!

Dat flappy woman with da bow and that big skelle guy, oh! what dey did to Herbert and dere were all dese horny guyz runnin around and we fought and fought band I though we were gunna win but den..

DA REAL BIG WINGED GUY!

Oh! Nuttin we did could do anything and he smushed Furyhand and he stomped all over me and..and..WHAT HE DID TO WILLIE! Swordz don't go in dat way! *sob Sob*

Okaydokee! I feel all better after getting all bit up by those dolls so now I can get back to my quest! I heard that after the mayor's house blew up, that my darlin was seen going into the big hole with those big fires in it so that is where I will check next.

I'm no dummy though! Nosiree! Now I got some guys to help. There is Herbert the goblin sneaker, Willie the Ogre priest of whatever they call their gawd and Furyhand the goatman who was brother to Madjaw. He knows all sorts of magic and can burn things good, haw! Haw! With these guys going along with me, we'll beat up everythin that comes after us!

But I thought she loved only me!

*Sob Sob*

AHHH! AHHH!! I'm sorry dollies! I didn't mean to knock over the horsie!

AGHH! Nooo! Please! I didn't mean to step on the tea set the nice lady gave you!

Don't bite there!! WAHHH!! MOMMY!!

Bob got those gobboes good, but what was he gunna do now? Bob managed to get into the ruins of the city and got plenty of torches
to keep the beasts away but how was he going to find his love?

Bob managed to talk to some thieves that lived in the north part. They sent him to crack the skulls of the leftovers of a gang called The Bastards that got killed off and said a yellow haired woman that looked like his love and had killed their leader said she had done some weird 'play' where she got covered in leeches and acid and fought big undead for the mayor.

Humies are strange.

They did say she was rumored to have gone into some...what was it? A hunter's lodge and find some treasure. Bob will go there and maybe she will be there!

Don't worry! Bald is beautiful!

Bob had met with some goblins that had been run out of the city. They talked about how their chiefton Whitechin had been killed by
the humies and while they didn't know if a yellow haired humie woman was with the ones that did it, they told Bob a lot about what
happened in the city. They told him about how a gang of devil humies named the Bastards had been wiped out and left the north side
of the city empty and ruined. They told of how the humie chiefton's home went up in flames and devils flew through the sky and that for a few gold, they could
show Bob a safe way into the city from the sewers..

THEY LIED! Bob got stuck and the goblins stole his bag with all the plunder he got from the big fight, he was gunna smash them!

Bob kind of remembers who else was there. There was some armor wearing man with a sword, a elf woman with a bow, some other man with knives,
a another sword man and a woman but they all vanished from Bob's mind when he saw her.

She had short yellow hair and looked like she had been in a bunch of fights before, scars and was that a burn? None of them mattered
to Bob though. Her voice was a sweet song and her eyes like blue..blue...like the sky! She asked Bob to fight with them against 'The Council'
Bob wasn't sure, since they had paid them gold and stuff, but they did send them off away from the main force. All those humies were getting
the best plunder! So Bob was okay, because she said please.

Bob stuck right close to Andrea, that was her name! They brought along that huge bug and man! Those council humies never stood a chance, just
how could a bug eat so many humies? Bob fell over once but his darling healed him right back up(Bob guessed that man in armor helped some but
he doesn't matter.) Then they got to the big tree!

That was a huge fight! So many people running around, Stiglor was there along with that itty bitty man who almost poisoned the but
that fancy singing guy blew all the poison away! Fleshgorgger ate about two, well more than two, ALOT! Armor guy cut open Stiglor
and his angel made another angel appear and heale dtheir wounds and then they won! Hurray!

The Mother came down to talk and Bob hid since she would be major mad at those who tried to burn her tree down. Bob looted some corpses
and got some nice steel to trade and gold and plenty of ogre mead! Bob got drunk though and passed out and when he came to, his
angel was gone.

Bob knew she had to have gone back to the humie city, but how to get to see her again. Bob had to think!

Bob was a typical giant, he hunted, brawled with his tribe, ambushed humans. You know, giant stuff. Life near the Wormwood was okay, but there
were two things that every member of his tribe knew,(actually there were more than two but nobody could count that high) Never mess with the
Mother of Flies and never try to raid the human city at night. Stupid Crackjaw thought he was pretty sneaky and could sneak in to get
some plunder to show off. Nobody EVER saw him again.

Some human named Stiglor was going around hiring some tribes to take on The Mother and was tossing around the gold and saying Bob's tribe could
have the area around the Maggot Tree for themselves if they helped and enforced the 'New council' when they took over the city, Bob
didn't know anything about any council but bringing down The Mother was good enough for him. There were a bunch of humans and some
bite-sized guy in the forces, but Bob and some other giants and ogres were sent to kill off Fleshgorger so The Mother would be
weaker.

Bob still thinks they were suckers for doing that. They killed those Jinkens and Fleshgorger started ripping into them, the ogres were
pretty much eaten but they were beating the bug down and it looked like they were winning but then they got hit
from behind by some humans. Arrows, swords and magic crushed everyone and Bob went down and everything was going black, but then he
felt better and opened his eyes..

...and saw her.

My love! Do not feel lonely, I will soon be with you again! No shadowbeast or Hellknight shall keep us apart.

Arrrooooooo. *scratch scratch*