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At the start of my pfs career I made the grandest decision to take 20 on opening a door, with no lock.
Nearly killed my whole party with it, including some veteran gm's, almost 1.5 years later and they still won't let me live it down.
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From last night's game:
We decided that spending several days repairing the elevator to the depths of Rachikan was a waste of time.
Instead, the party druid put on a ring of Feather Falling, cast Ant Haul, wildshaped into a large tiger, and leapt down the shaft with the rest of the party clinging to his back.
The waiting Morlocks, having no descending elevator to leap upon in waves, gathered below to gape up at the sight. Then it started raining Fireballs and Alchemist's bombs.
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Venture-Lieutenant, Arizona—Tempe
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I was at Phoenix Comic-Con 2013, and decided to try out Pathfinder Society. I had the pleasure of playing Echoes of the Overwatched, run by James F. Mackenzie himself (who rather proudly informed us that it had apparently been voted worst map of the year, or somesuch honor).
I played the pregen rogue. I then proceeded to "rogue" it up over the scenario, carting around corpses, rifling pockets (did you know Nigel carries around some of his collection of gnome porn?) and finding out where the dead people lived so I could "appropriate" their stuff before the next of kin found out.
The crowning moment came early though, when I requested a rug from Nigel to help carry a certain body back from the Museum to the Grand Lodge for burial. Afterwards I kept the 700-year old rug because - who knew? - when placed in my quarters, it really tied the room together.
I think James must have been pretty tired by that point, because he lost it for damn near a minute. Good times.
Cheers, Key
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Venture-Lieutenant, Arizona—Tempe
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Oh, and there was the time in the Cyphermage Dilemma where we get to the warehouse (you know the one). Deciding to try non-violence, I knock on the door and inform the gentle-being who answered that I was an inspector from the city, here to check for rats. Since these rats carried a plague that caused your junk to rot off, I *really* need to inspect the warehouse.
Despite having a 7 Charisma (yes, I regret this) I have a decent Bluff, and rolled a 19. The poor GM didn't know what to do, since they believed me, were scared stiff.... and still didn't want to let me in.
- Cheers, Key
Regional Venture-Coordinator, Baltic
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The next round on his action the bard says he wants to continue his performance. I ask him if he's sure about that, because the entire party had decided to close their eyes! He stopped dancing and started singing. (Thinking of it, some Hard Rock from Whitesnake would have been appropriate.)
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Scenario: emerald spire 1st level
Characters: Half-orc warpreist, dwarves kineticist, Human rogue, Human ranger
The great nicaros (counterfeit mage rogue archetype) was accept this mission and is sadly regretting it. His companions he traveling with were nothing but Frat boys.
As soon as we started the scenario the dwarf and half orc started having a BROmance. This causes for no stealthing, lots of competion against the two and solutions only a Frat would think of.
Dwarf: "I'm going to bull rush the table"
GM: *looks confused* "umm okay beat a CMD of 10"
Dwarf: *rolls a Nat 20* "27 on bull rush"
GM: "okay you bull rush the table sending it and the goblin sitting there into a wall. The goblin now unconcious"
Half-orc: "I pick up the goblin and tie it to my shield."
Dwarf: "nice meat shield" *high fives the Half-orc*
GM: *face palm*
Me: *mumbles* "let the hazing begins"
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Just finished Waking Rune. "One punch..!"
GM rolled a one.
Krune went down.
The table went crazy (I thought the restaurant we were at was going to throw us out). Krune eventually recovered but it was downhill for him from there.
Best. Sesson. Ever
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Venture-Captain, Massachusetts—Central & West
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After some messy splattering of enemy combatants, my gnome wizard headed into the hallway and had to take his pants off after combat. Shortly thereafter, more people rush into the hallway. To play it off and stall before the NPCs could get into the room, the gnome starts dancing. It's now known as Magic Mike XXS.
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Me: Listen, friends, we're on your side here. We're trying to get these captive humans out before anything happens to them. That one's father is sick (gestures to appropriate NPC); they need your help.
Cleric: ....you're undead, why would you care about humans?
Me:Well, you see, we come from a small Liberal Arts college here in Geb...
Once the laughter died down, it was a bluff/diplomacy combo to convince them of our progressive views.
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after being ambushed by mooks - one of whom was throwing Stingchucks (a weapon that just makes you say "Eyuuu"), we started to ask for information.
Three of the mooks are negative HP, but stable, and one is still able to talk, so we start with the standard...
Social PC, "So, Mook, how's it going? Looks like you guys could use a little healing - your health coverage going to handle this? you with Mooks for Hire? Anyway, who sent you to put the hurt on us?"
Mook #4, "You'se go'n ta 'ave ta talk ta da Headman."
Social PC, "and who would this boss guy be? how would we find him?"
Mook #4 - pointing at Mook #1, "Da 'Head' man - da guy dat had the Heads..."
Social PC, "ah! yeah, now I get it..."
Mook #4, "yeah, 'e's da brains of dis job...."
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When we dispatched the reanimated corpse of his Pegasus friend, the little dragon was inconsolable. Bronja held him close, and whispered, "There there--wash away your sorrows with the blood of your enemies."
He seemed to take this advice to heart, for when Marigana was defeated, Riddywhipple seized a rock and began pounding her corpse to a bloody pulp, screaming, "BLOOD AND THUNDER!"
When the party returned to Ignizi, she picked up right away that something was amiss with Riddywhipple--covered in blood, breathing heavily, eyes burning with rage. "What's wrong with him?" she asked. "He found religion," was the reply.
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Grrr here, a kitsune fox form fighter.
Went on one adventure, used paw signals to communicate. Second adventure, picked up a ring of eloquence.. but waited until the party was getting a guard (and themselves) rather drunk before saying anything.
So.. the fox only talks to you when you're drunk.
He picked up 140 proof dwarven brandy and labled it "Elixir of fox comprehension" and passes it out to the party.
Cue a scenario where our escort is an eagle knight. We of course come accross a group of drunk chelaxians. Grr, being a member of liberty's edge, breaks out into the golarian equivilant of Battle cry of freedom
Andor forever
Horah boys hurah
down with the slavers
run em all up the spar...
That was initiative...
RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8
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Two from Saturday's game.
Playing School of spirits, with two of the kids I ran the game for. They're all excited and enjoying having a groupie of their very own and are telling us all the things to avoid, like objects floating through the air.
I whisper to the GM (their mom) "I'm going to mage hand a loaf of bread to follow her."
We all lose it at "I'm not going to take a bite of a piece of floating bread!"
Later when divying up the potions, the younger says, "I'll take one of the watermellons, because I hate cherry!" Out of the mouth of babes and we bust out laughing. "Now that's dedication when your potion selection is based on taste."
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In Day of the Demon 5-14, there's a password the PCs can discover to bypass an obstacle, something about pledging loyalty to Asmodeus and entering his house of cloven hooves. Things is, I'm playing with Italians, and the word for hoof, "zoccola", is slang for b@%@@. Ostergarde is now known as 'Asmodeus' B%!@* Palace'.
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Acing a bluff check to pursuade the occupants of a town in Nirmathas that Razimir is actually 9 Large Crabs in a robe and mask (it's why he never shows his face, see?), who set up the church to gain enough enough money to purchase a humanoid body for himselves.
Thanks to the Convincing Lie rogue talent, the rumour got quite a long way before it puttered out, and a few of the local GMs still mention it during Gather Information rolls from time to time in PFS games :)
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RPG Superstar 2009 Top 32, 2010 Top 8
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Threadromancy...
Saturday playing 4-20, and making a hash of it. (note: When you play the skill monkey, not playing the skill monkey bites you in the aft.)
Fighting a gelatinous cube, we're making all the obligatory Jello jokes. We get to my turn and my slayer studies and shoots it.
Now ever since Arrow started it's become a joke to do the throaty growl he had in season one. So as I roll to hit... "You have failed this dessert tray!
And another from Serpents Rise.
"No problem!" Says the professional, "I've disable device." One botched roll later (well three, since his trapspotter talent met my cold dice...)
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Playing Between the Lines with my Gnome Sorcerer, Spaknir, a gnome summoner, a dwarven cleric and Harsk as a support NPC. Part way through the scenario, we had to talk to an alchemist about acquiring an item. We met the alchemist and discussed her offer. The other gnome and I convinced Harsk to acquiesce to an alchemist's request *to avoid spoilers*, and the GM rolled Harsk's Sense Motive- and failed.
A good few minutes of laughter followed suit as Harsk was strapped to a dubious looking machine.
Recently GM'ing Mists of Mwangi, a party of a Pyrokinetist, Monk, and Wizard were accompanied by Kyra as the default Cleric of the group.
Kyra failed her save to the Mist's influence in the infamous "save or suck" trap of the scenario.
Later, after the curse was lifted, she was the only character to fail a save against the Vargoulle's paralyzing shriek.
It's good to have expendable NPC's.
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Venture-Lieutenant, Finland—Tampere
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A beautiful moment from our run of The Ruby Phoenix Tournament just over a year ago: the party druid wildshapes into a behemoth hippopotamus at the start of a fight that takes place while the PCs are having dinner. There's nowhere else for her to fit, so she wildshapes onto the table. The somewhat dim-witted half-orc monk's reaction? "Waiter! There is a hippopotamus in my soup!"
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A beautiful moment from our run of The Ruby Phoenix Tournament just over a year ago: the party druid wildshapes into a behemoth hippopotamus at the start of a fight that takes place while the PCs are having dinner. There's nowhere else for her to fit, so she wildshapes onto the table. The somewhat dim-witted half-orc monk's reaction? "Waiter! There is a hippopotamus in my soup!"
Okay... during my play thru my Tower Shield Specialist/Dirty Trick Fighter (who is know as the 'Bard Beater' for something like 8 encounters with bards (party and NPC) where she's publicly beat them silly) walks into an encounter with several bards..who ALL make their Knowledge (Local) roll and ID her as the 'Infamous Bard Beater'.
Needless to say the first round was focused on one particular fighter in the party.
Throat punch/sunder MW bardic instruments/pants enough bards and .. folks take umbrage at it.
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GM: I only hit AC10.
New Player (running Kyra): That gets me.
GM: Aren't you wearing armour?
New Player: I took it off.
GM: Why did you do that?
New Player: It was uncomfortable.
That... is a facepalm of epic proportions.
How about this one... Running We Be Goblins, the party is all sickened from various things. Most of them from eating bull slugs without spitting out the poison gland. So when they get ambushed by a terrifying giant spider they aren't in top form. Two get entangled in webs almost right away, but only Mogmerch is able to break free. Chuffy manages to stab the spider, while Reta misses... badly. At which point Mogmerch throws a bomb, blowing up not only the spider but Reta and Chuffy too.
Now, according to the combat tactics entry, the spider flees if it's hurt bad enough. And it has the initiative over everyone. Mogmerch tries chasing after, but decides to throw a bomb after preforming a single move action. Since the spider's not actually visible right now, I give a 50% miss chance then describe the explosion (the bomb missed). At which point Mogmerch decides to try finding the spider's lair to get a trophy.
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And rolls a 2 on the Survival check.
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As the adventure was beginning, the GM told the two intelligence-based characters to roll Will saving throws. The wizard passed; I (an investigator) failed. "OK," said the GM. "Don't let me forget."
At the end of the adventure, I asked the GM what those Will saves were about. "Nothing," he answered. "I was messing with your heads."
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Last space at the table was near a chum with a legion of dice set up as in a dress parade. I asked him what they were for, and he answered they were for his attacks. He was a high-level TWF ninja with natural attacks to boot so had about 36d6 sneak attack dice ready right beside the weapon dice.
Cool.
Battle 1: Nauseated ninja
Battles 2-finale: Elementals, haunts, and various non-crittable monsters.
End of game, I point at all the d6s.
"So, what are these dice for again?"
:)
Later, same convention, that player sees me walk up to observe him play the same ninja. He frowns at me, "Glitterdusted..."
"So really, what are those dice for?"
Tee hee. He took it all really, really well.
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Venture-Captain, Texas—Austin
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Playing Mists of Mwangai for the first time recently during a 24 hour game day, so it was 4 am and we were all sleep deprived and delirious.
I was playing my bat skinwalker bloodrager for the first time, and had the dire bat shape feat. Her whole motivation for joining society is trying to overcome her feral nature through the help from her comrades in the society.
After the second combat, she got angry because she was rolling bad in the previous combats and shaped into a large bat. This of course meant that the scarf covering my mouth disappeared and I failed my will save.
So now I am a feral large size monkey-bat hybrid monster. I really played it up, and scared the two new players at the table so much, they had their characters try and lock me inside a room, even leaving another one locked in there with me scrambling to do a disable device check to escape (he rolled almost max rounds). They ended triggering the last encounter without me because they were trying to run away.
One even asked if he was going to kill his character. I assured him I would only attack his character if he gave me permission.
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Venture-Lieutenant, Finland—Tampere
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Replayed The Night March of Kalkamedes a while ago and we had some... inventive problem solving.
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The other day we took a trip on the Throaty Mermaid, and my first game playing (not GMing) with my bloodrager kinda turned me off of him......my MWK Spiked Breastplate get's eaten; an intimidate check get's me cold-cocked in the face with an alchemist bomb BEFORE we roll initiative, for half my health; and the boss fight starts with me getting stabbed in the gut for half my health before initiative...again.
Everyone else thought it was funny that the biggest beat stick spent round 2+ of every combat napping.
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The other day we took a trip on the Throaty Mermaid, and my first game playing (not GMing) with my bloodrager kinda turned me off of him......my MWK Spiked Breastplate get's eaten; an intimidate check get's me cold-cocked in the face with an alchemist bomb BEFORE we roll initiative, for half my health; and the boss fight starts with me getting stabbed in the gut for half my health before initiative...again.
Everyone else thought it was funny that the biggest beat stick spent round 2+ of every combat napping.
I GM'd Murder on the Throaty Mermaid for a dad and his two kids- he was playing a bloodrager, and he was the main investigator.
That said, ran through From the Tome of Righteous Repose with my Emerald Spire Fighter, being the lowest level amongst the party [5, with a 6, and four 7's].
One of the lvl 7's was a Bard with the Commune spell from his Oni familiar. We got 6 Y/N questions before entering the dungeon.
My fighter asked "Are there dragons?" [I couldn't think of any relevant questions.]
The GM smiled, and said... Yes.
Well, we found the dragon early.
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This occurred very recently:
I was GMing Destiny of the Sands, Part I: A Bitter Bargain and
During the party, they convinced Madame Zelekharti to work for Grand Master Torch due to all the business he would bring in, and thus she could collect even more secrets.
In the morning, one of the party members who was a Kitsune with Realistic Likeness impersonated Grand Master Torch and "signed" for the bill they had racked up of 30,000gp worth of drinks, damages, and other assortments.
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so the scenario didn't really matter save that it was my Halfling and 4 dwarves at the table. now my Halfling likes having a lot of stuff (like large wagon full of stuff) and one of the things I had was a 75gal barrel of mead. the dwarves find out about this at the start or the multi-day adventure and spend the whole game joking about dipping out a mug full. like constantly. with every action.
"i grab a mug of mead and go to investigate."
"ok I grab a mug of mead and wait here."
"here wait, let me fill my mug and I will go with you" etc...so at the end of the adventure I decide to roll percentile dice to find out just how much they drank and I swear it came up 100% the damn dwarves polished off 75 gallons of mead in 3 or 4 days!
Doesn't sound like the dwarves were very thirsty. :)
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So, I was running 4-23 Rivalry's End for a group at our local game day. One of the PCs pulled out his old Shadow Lodge character whose entire schtick was acting as a body double for Grandmaster Torch for Shadow Lodge functions via assorted disguise spells and looking somewhat like him already (but enough to tell the difference normally). He was making a point of hitting up the old Shadow Lodge/GMT scenarios to get his kicks in with the character before adjusting his arc for post-Shadow Lodge life.
Things went mostly as expected for Rivalry's End, up until....
At the end of the scenario, when Torch engages in his sudden-yet-inevitable-betrayal and his bodyguard pulls weapons, the player in question actually misinterprets what is going on as initiative is rolled.
He believes the guards are another round of assassins there for Torch, upset that he'd executed The Spider. He wins initiative, and bee lines for Torch with the intent to protect him....by casting Body Double . Torch makes his Spellcraft roll to know what the spell is, and waives his save against the spell with a chuckle.
There are now two Torches, indistinguishable from each other, as the Guards try to murder the PCs and Torch makes his break for it. Torch, being Torch, Montebanks out without a word. As I describe this, it dawns on the poor Body Double player that Torch did, in fact, betray them all and left him there to suffer for it.
Body Double is not dismissible. I confirm with our Venture Captain, running another table nearby, that this falls into the "acceptable" PvP a la when a PC is Dominated.
Hilarity ensues as the PCs true to subdue the bodyguards and the Torch Body Double, who continues to swear he's not really Torch the whole time whilst the bodyguards try to protect him.
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Doesn't sound like the dwarves were very thirsty. :)so the scenario didn't really matter save that it was my Halfling and 4 dwarves at the table. now my Halfling likes having a lot of stuff (like large wagon full of stuff) and one of the things I had was a 75gal barrel of mead. the dwarves find out about this at the start or the multi-day adventure and spend the whole game joking about dipping out a mug full. like constantly. with every action.
"i grab a mug of mead and go to investigate."
"ok I grab a mug of mead and wait here."
"here wait, let me fill my mug and I will go with you" etc...so at the end of the adventure I decide to roll percentile dice to find out just how much they drank and I swear it came up 100% the damn dwarves polished off 75 gallons of mead in 3 or 4 days!
3 days? must not of been very good mead...
75 gallons divided by 5 PCs (you can't tell me the HALFLING isn't in there getting a full share) gives 15 gallons each.
15 gallons in 3 days is only 5 gallons a day. Heck, all they need is some pizza and they have a Lodge Dorm weekend...
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Running the confirmation on Roll20. One of the players is playing a swashbuckler, and had been pretty much owning every fight due to system mastery and good rolls. I don't think he even took a single point of damage or failed a save. Fast forward to the end.
The Minotaur wins initiative and whacks Janira what good, Negan style. She's negative and dying. Minotaur then makes an epic movement check to cross the river toward the pathfinders, axe held high. Rest of the party starts buffing, and single moves to stay together. Swash sprints to the Minotaur. He had to double move, so no attack. The rest of the group is shouting "No! Don't go alone like that!"
He laughs and replies something like "nothing in this scenario has been hard so far, this'll be easy. I'll opportune parry and riposte him since I can't attack this turn!"
Minotaur up, swings for nosebleeds. Rolls a critical threat. Doesn't confirm. Swash goes to parry. Rolls a natural 1. Uses his folio reroll. Rolls another natural 1. Uses his trait to reroll any deed that comes up a natural 1. Rolls a 3. Minotaur plows his face in. Max damage. Swash goes down hard. Monk, who hasn't hit anything the whole scenario due to the Swash killing everything first, lands stunning fist. Minotaur fails save, bloodrager cleans up with his falchion. Swash was 1 point away from dead. Group stabilizes him, and Janira, walks away with both Prestige. This was a couple of years ago, and the group still won't let him live it down.