69. Ask if you can keep a copy of a PC that just died permanently. Over the next several game sessions, have the PC's just miss the BBEG or his/her lieutenant, while leaving clues that the person they keep missing shares disturbing similarities with the the recently deceased PC.
Alternatively, keep the sheet in plain view during games and act like you're copying select information from it while the players chat. Occasionally remark things like, "Ooh, you have cloudkill? I mean, you had it?"
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71.) Occasionally after a player states that he/she is about to perform an action, respond with an incredulous "if you say so" or "if that's what you want to do."
72) "The eyes of the statue/painting seem to follow you as you cross the room"
73) Show up to the session with multiple size Gargantuan miniatures.
73b. Dust off your colossal red dragon "miniature", so that you can "just get an idea of scale".
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74) When the players take one path instead of another remark "Well, I sure hope you guys know what you're getting into."
75) Gasp when a player rolls low for a saving throw and slowly shake your head
76) Remind your players to keep spare character sheets handy pre-session.
77. When rolling random encounters, roll the die with the result obscured. Pause, doing a double take. "Oooh." Roll a second time. Purse your lips and proceed.
79: Check your notes, look quizzically at them, stare at the players appraisingly for a moment. Shake your head, grab a pen and strike something out.
80: Same as above, but grab a calculator and start scribbling things down as you say "times ten, then that one times five, then definitely that one AT LEAST times two...".
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83. Make a number of rolls, then look worried and tell them that you need to take a break.
53. when they roll for Perception or Sense Motive saying, "you didn't perceive or sense anything amiss, nothing 'seems' to be there or they don't 'seem' to be lying.70: Related to this one...just a different way to do so...
When the PCs make a Sense Motive roll or a perception check...'As far as you know the barmaid is telling the truth.' or 'As far as you know the door is cleared of traps.'
Man, I thought that, "she seems to be telling the truth," and "you detect no traps," was standard operating procedure. :)
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84. "How do you open the door?"
85. Tell the PCs that the woods seem more silent than usual. Then ask for percception checks when they set up camp.
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86. "The good news is I rolled a 2. The bad news is - what's your AC again? Yup, that's still a hit."
87. "I need to know what buffs everyone has up right now."
88. "Say, did you all get separate rooms or did you just get one room?"
89. "Let me know as soon as any of you eat any of the food. I'll need you to make a perception check."
90. "Did you use any protection?"
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93. Player: "I'm going to put this artifact in my Bag of Holding so it can stay safe and nobody will know about it."
GM: "Well, that's fantastic, a really smart decision! I'll just mark it down on my sheet over here that you have your artifact in that Bag of Holding so it doesn't draw attention-AAAAND it's gone.
Player: "...What?"
GM: "The artifact in your Bag of Holding, it didn't do too well, it's gone."
Player: "What do you mean, I have the artifact!"
GM: "Not anymore you don't. Poof!"
93. Player: "I'm going to put this artifact in my Bag of Holding so it can stay safe and nothing bad will happen to it."
GM: "Well, that's fantastic, a really smart decision! I'll just mark it down on my sheet over here that you have your artifact in that Bag of Holding so it doesn't draw attention-AAAAND it's gone.
Player: "...What?"
GM: "The artifact in your Bag of Holding, it didn't do too well, it's gone."
Player: "What do you mean, I have the artifact!"
GM: "Not anymore you don't. Poof!"
If I was the player I'd take that bag and start an artifact disposal service.
"Got an artifact you can't seem to get rid of? For a mere 50,000 gold I'll let you put it on my special Bag of Holding and it'll disappear for ever! Guaranteed!"
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93. Player: "I'm going to put this artifact in my Bag of Holding so it can stay safe and nobody will know about it."
GM: "Well, that's fantastic, a really smart decision! I'll just mark it down on my sheet over here that you have your artifact in that Bag of Holding so it doesn't draw attention-AAAAND it's gone.
Player: "...What?"
GM: "The artifact in your Bag of Holding, it didn't do too well, it's gone."
Player: "What do you mean, I have the artifact!"
GM: "Not anymore you don't. Poof!"
This example seems less about inducing paranoia and more about being mean-spirited. I would be more angry than paranoid, at any rate.
Anyway...
94.) Are you sure you don't want to buy a 10-foot pole? They're on a discount in the local general store...
95.) You suddenly notice that the corpses of those orcs you just killed are no longer there.
Man, I thought that, "she seems to be telling the truth," and "you detect no traps," was standard operating procedure. :)
53. when they roll for Perception or Sense Motive saying, "you didn't perceive or sense anything amiss, nothing 'seems' to be there or they don't 'seem' to be lying.70: Related to this one...just a different way to do so...
When the PCs make a Sense Motive roll or a perception check...'As far as you know the barmaid is telling the truth.' or 'As far as you know the door is cleared of traps.'
Well I go that extra mile for my players I guess. ;)
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93. Player: "I'm going to put this artifact in my Bag of Holding so it can stay safe and nobody will know about it."
GM: "Well, that's fantastic, a really smart decision! I'll just mark it down on my sheet over here that you have your artifact in that Bag of Holding so it doesn't draw attention-AAAAND it's gone.
Player: "...What?"
GM: "The artifact in your Bag of Holding, it didn't do too well, it's gone."
Player: "What do you mean, I have the artifact!"
GM: "Not anymore you don't. Poof!"
This example seems less about inducing paranoia and more about being mean-spirited. I would be more angry than paranoid, at any rate.
Anyway...
94.) Are you sure you don't want to buy a 10-foot pole? They're on a discount in the local general store...
95.) You suddenly notice that the corpses of those orcs you just killed are no longer there.
Of course, one could always think that the Artifact is actually an Intelligent Item that's claustrophobic, plus comes with a runspeed and can cast Invisibility at-will. If the PCs couldn't properly identify it (most Artifacts can't be, given their stupid-high DCs), telling them that it goes "poof" either provides false information as to what the Artifact actually does, or they think putting the item in a Bag of Holding was actaully the means to destroy the artifact. I only made it in reference to the video link, which I find is a prime example of messing with people.
At any rate...
96.) As the final blow was dealt to the BBEG, he says "You may have beaten me, but your princess is in another castle!"
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98: "Did any of you happen to bring soap?"
Fitting that we get the "whoops, tougher than I thought" joke on the 102nd idea. XD
102b. Have an arbitrary number of d6s ready when the NPC mage casts his spell. Pick them up, pause. "Oh, s@!$, I just remembered this isn't enough. Pass me that dice bucket there."
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Did this once, about 30 years ago:
We were leveling up at the end of a long session. A player with a wizard reached a level where he could replace his puny starting familiar with something cooler like an imp. I told him I was working on an expanded table with lots of extra monsters from the many source books I had. We'd roll on the chart next week.
I got one of the other players in on the gag. Oh, and there was no chart. I knew what he wanted (a faerie dragon) and I was going to let him have it - but I certainly didn't tell him that...
Next week, at the start of the session, I opened my 3-ring binder to some random page and then told the wizard player to roll. Of course, he couldn't see the page, by my accomplice was watching over my shoulder. The player rolled something boring, like a 40, so I said "Ooh, cool, you get a sub-type chart" and flipped the page, then told him to roll again. He rolled an 08.
I looked surprised. Then I laughed and pointed (at the empty page) so my accomplice could "see" the result too. He said "No freaking way!" in his most surprise voice. All pre-arranged, of course. I said "Yep, look, it's right there." He asked "Why is he even on the table?" to which I answered "It's a sub-table of the special table, I just wanted to be thorough. I didn't think anyone would ever roll it, it's a million to one."
Of course, the wizard's player was getting all excited. He thought he'd hit the jackpot.
My co-conspirator asked "You aren't really going to do it are you?". I asked if he thought I should make him roll again. Then I asked the wizard's player if he wanted a re-roll, but said he'd stick with his roll.
So I closed my imaginary familiar table and said "OK, you finish your ritual and nothing happens at first, but then a small warp appears in the air near your feet, about the size of a grape. It seems to suck light into it as it pulses and expands. You feel heat radiating from it, and soon some greasy black smokes begins to pour out and fall to the ground, then spread out and rise up, forming a pillar, and then shifting to take on the approximate shape of a man. Head, arms, legs, torso. It becomes more distinct and then it solidifies into the form of a large man, about 8 feet tall with cloven hove and horns and red skin, a pointy black goatee, and fiery red eyes. He blinks, looks around for a moment and then fixes his fiendish gaze upon you. Raising his intricate mace and pointing it at you, he demands 'What is the meaning of this?'. He seems angry. What do you do?"
The player, very confused, asked "Is that Asmodeus?"
"Of course I am Asmodeus, mortal!" he boomed. "Why have you brought me here? I was just summoning a new familiar to serve me in hell and suddenly I find myself here, in the prime material plane of all things? What have you done?"
The player tried to explain that he was just summoning a familiar, not trying to summon Asmodeus.
Asmodeus looked him up and down, disapprovingly, and then finally said. "What rotten luck. Here I was, summoning a new familiar, hoping for an Erinyes with a big rack - no, I don't mean the torture device - or hell, I'd even settle for a Succubus or even a Marilith. But no, I had to get YOU as my familiar?"
The player actually looked horrified at this point. So did the rest of players, including my accomplice. He said "Wait, I am your familiar?"
Asmodeus said "Well, I sure as all my nine Hells am not going to be yours. So it looks like I'm stuck with you for a year and a day. So be it. Come along and try to make yourself useful." And then he opens a gate and pulls you through it with him.
Then I said "I'm going to need your character sheet. I'll give it back in a year, give or take a day. You should really try to summon a familiar that is closer to your level next time."
The poor guy actually asked my accomplice if he really rolled that and my accomplice went along with it fully, even convinced him that he saw it with his own eyes.
Of course, after a moment of everyone looking around the table in shock, I finally confessed that I was just kidding, none of that really happened, and I handed the wizard's player the pre-generated faerie dragon familiar, and everyone had a good laugh about it.
To this day, that player (and the other friends of mine who were there that day) still brings up this little gag.
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48c. Use two different colors of paper. Choose who gets which color completely arbitrarily. :)
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104 Comment on some random inconsequential event (ie: a mouse crosses your path)
107. On a random encounter d% roll of 99 walk away from the table, circle around, and come back with a look of disgust and say "I hope at least one of you survives this"
108. Have a copy of a notoriously evil sourcebook that's visibly in your stack of books. Especially if it's from an earlier (and over-powered) edition of the game. Something like Book of Vile Darkness, Fiendish Codex I, or Lords of Madness in a Pathfinder game.
Pull that book out, flip to a page, and seemingly study it for a moment. Smile evilly, snap the book shut, and go on with the game.
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109. "It appears safe" is a favourite of our GM.
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110. Bring a bunch of grapes with you. Do not share. Eat one grape every time a player rolls a d20. Look at the players with increasing pity in your eyes as the grapes start running out. Eat the final grape with a sense of grave finality, and take a solemn pause to look carefully over your materials before continuing.
111b: Hand a note to the player whose character always stands in the front. Tell him to move to the rear and say nothing to anyone.
111c: Hand a note to the player whose character has Sneak Attack...
111c: Hand a note to the player whose character has Sneak Attack...
111d: Hand a note to the player whose character has Sneak Attack. Make sure a noticeably larger amount of material is written on that note, so that everyone sees him spending a bunch more time reading it.
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115. Ask vague and/or harmless questions about your PC's characters, like "Are you an only child?" or "What are your undergarments made of?", then respond with a "mhmm" and roll a d100.
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It's fun when the BBEG is an illusionist and you creep them out enough about a room that they want to leave. Then you ask how.
"...Through the door?"
"What door."
Ha ha, these are great. Dotting to read later.
118. When first preparing for the session, 'accidentally' leave the beastiary open to the Mimic page.
119. Frequently ask the players if they want to make a perception check. Then consult your notes while muttering "Interesting, interesting."
120. "What is your Perception modifier again?" ... "Oh, okay. You don't notice anything."
121. "You just have a feeling that you missed something important."
122. Roll a d20. "Hey, rules-guru, if someone fails a save against Dominate Person, do they notice it?" "No." "Okay. Thanks."