Ambrosia Slaad |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
{twirls invisible mustache} The RAW. Do you know what the RAW is? It's the thousand Save-or-Dies of Gygax's enemies -- a game we agree to play with each other over and over, until we forget that it's a lie. (Possibly NSFW clip)
{pauses to gnaw on some random scenery} Chaos isn't a pit. Chaos is a ladder. Many who try to climb it fail, and never get to try again. The fall breaks them. And some, given a chance to climb, they refuse. They cling to the Lawful, or the house-rules, or optimization. Illusions. Only the ladder is real.
Celestial Healer |
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Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.
There may have been other contributing factors.
Wojciech Jaruzelski |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Bah! I survived Martial Law, soldiers and tanks as a three year old child!
[On the phone, circa 1981]
Excellent, excellent, you picked up Lech? Excellent, what about Kuron?
[Rubs hands with glee]
Excellent! What about Baby Drejk? What?!? He got away?!? Wtf?!? Get Brezhnev on the phone, we might as well give up now!
Patrick Curtin |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |
Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.
THE STARS ALIGN!
IA! IA! KRUELHULHU P'THAGN!
MissingNo |
Kruelaid wrote:Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.THE STARS ALIGN!
IA! IA! KRUELHULHU P'THAGN!
HUZZAH!! &j23b9& [!/va7 A*hdk& $<; uq7# 8$';ux #$78hn3ED7$j487j4?
Celestial Healer |
8 people marked this as a favorite. |
Pffft. Just generic punks who think they know how to fight. Bah. Let me tell you, kids, I am so f%$&ing hardcore I SURVIVED THE COLD WAR! And I was right in the MIDDLE of it. As a LITTLE KID!
Yeah. Spiked chain? Allow me to be slightly amused.
Yeah, but the Cold War's over.
You know why?
Because I won.
With my spiked chain.
Bill Lumberg |
Sissyl wrote:Pffft. Just generic punks who think they know how to fight. Bah. Let me tell you, kids, I am so f%$&ing hardcore I SURVIVED THE COLD WAR! And I was right in the MIDDLE of it. As a LITTLE KID!
Yeah. Spiked chain? Allow me to be slightly amused.
Yeah, but the Cold War's over.
You know why?
Because I won.
With my spiked chain.
*GOLFCLAP*
Face-Palm |
Celestial Healer wrote:*GOLFCLAP*Sissyl wrote:Pffft. Just generic punks who think they know how to fight. Bah. Let me tell you, kids, I am so f%$&ing hardcore I SURVIVED THE COLD WAR! And I was right in the MIDDLE of it. As a LITTLE KID!
Yeah. Spiked chain? Allow me to be slightly amused.
Yeah, but the Cold War's over.
You know why?
Because I won.
With my spiked chain.
*follows suit*
Bob Sothoth |
Kruelaid wrote:Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.THE STARS ALIGN!
IA! IA! KRUELHULHU P'THAGN!
Ia! Ia!
DungeonmasterCal |
Besides Vin Diesel...is there a single muscular/in-shape guy that is known to play DnD?
Is there a single MMA/UFC fighter out there that admits he plays DnD? It doesn't count if it was when he was a kid. Many UFC fighters train and learn to become fighters from getting their ass kicked as a kid.
One of my players is an amateur MMA fighter. I'm not joking.. lol.. he really is. He's won most of the fights he's been in, I believe. But he's the only one of us who'd stand a chance in a real fight.. lol
Bill Lumberg |
Marcus Jones was a professional MMA fighter who competed in the UFC. Prior to that he played seven seasons in the NFL for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. He has stated that he was an avid DnD player when he was young.
Drejk |
Pffft. Just generic punks who think they know how to fight. Bah. Let me tell you, kids, I am so f#*%ing hardcore I SURVIVED THE COLD WAR! And I was right in the MIDDLE of it. As a LITTLE KID!
Yeah. Spiked chain? Allow me to be slightly amused.
I was in the center too. Living all my life a kilometer away of a target for strategic nuclear bombing. Those Imperialistic Capitalists did not bomb it. Think about it.
Green Left Eye |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |
This forum has pictures disabled because the last time I talked about my fighting skills which you cannot be taught because I made them myself and they come from my personal power someone asked me to prove it so I posted a picture of the time I punched through three ninjas who were also robots and the picture was so awesome that a bunch of the users went blind from looking at it so you're all really very lucky that they disabled pictures because otherwise you would be reading this with your blind eyes.
Bill Lumberg |
Again, for Marcus Jones was he playing DnD when he was in the gym and playing high school football? Or before that when he was maybe getting beat up in Junieor High and realized he needed to make a change.
No idea. Although, it is likely that he was probably bigger than anyone else in his school, so I doubt he got beaten up much.
And what's the guy's MMA record out of curiosity?
4-2
kmal2t |
You'd be surprised how these guys change. They often start as the skinny runt who got their ass kicked then sprout up to be the tough guy. This has happened to many a MMA fighter/NFL player.
And 4-2 isn't enough to be really a seasoned MMA fighter unless he has previous fights in another league under his belt. Does he have any belts in a M.A. or boxing/wrestling background at least?
Kruelaid |
Kruelaid wrote:There may have been other contributing factors.Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.
I don't see how you're to blame... I mean what else were you going to do with all those degloved moose penises?
GeraintElberion |
Bill Lumberg wrote:*follows suit*Celestial Healer wrote:*GOLFCLAP*Sissyl wrote:Pffft. Just generic punks who think they know how to fight. Bah. Let me tell you, kids, I am so f%$&ing hardcore I SURVIVED THE COLD WAR! And I was right in the MIDDLE of it. As a LITTLE KID!
Yeah. Spiked chain? Allow me to be slightly amused.
Yeah, but the Cold War's over.
You know why?
Because I won.
With my spiked chain.
Golfclapping is weak sauce.
Real fighters golfwang (oh, so NSFW)...
GeraintElberion |
Guns don't kill people... I kill people... with guns...Probably NSFW for cursing?
Ooh, similar to this bit of ironicality from 2004.
_Cobalt_ |
The person who GMs my games has been trained by local police and can be called on in emergencies. One of the players has two knives on him at all times. Another is a Lacrosse player, and has broken people's arms playing that sport. One of my players I GM for is a semi-professional shooter, and sleeps with a machete beside his bed.
And all I know how to do is defend myself with a quarterstaff, fence a bit, and use a crossbow. :/
Bill Lumberg |
The person who GMs my games has been trained by local police and can be called on in emergencies. One of the players has two knives on him at all times. Another is a Lacrosse player, and has broken people's arms playing that sport. One of my players I GM for is a semi-professional shooter, and sleeps with a machete beside his bed.
And all I know how to do is defend myself with a quarterstaff, fence a bit, and use a crossbow. :/
Egad! Did this group come about by chance or do you just play in a really dangerous area?
meatrace |
Quiche Lisp |
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When I was 7 years old, I witnessed my granpa exercising himself in "la savate" martial art behind the Notre-dame cathedral ; he was getting ready to take on Hyppolite Hunchback, master of the famous Church Bell Piledrive maneuver.
When I was 12 years old, I was finally ready to take revenge on Hyppo for killing my beloved granpa ; I lost an eye in that fight, but he lost his head: a fair trade if there have ever been. Now they called me "Eyepatch Quiche".
But the French Royal Police issued a warrant for my head, and so I was forced to take refuge in the extended medieval underground cave network under Paris. There I rallied a tribe of Celtic-ascendancy warriors and restored their honor after defeating their master, the dread bloodsucker "Monsieur Nosferatu."
Then I discovered the insanity that is the Grapple maneuver in this newfangled RPG stuff they called "Pathfinder" ; I have incorporated it in my beloved savate and I am now on the fast track for world domination.
Ha ha ha ha !*
[french for "Muahahaha !"]
Celestial Healer |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Celestial Healer wrote:I don't see how you're to blame... I mean what else were you going to do with all those degloved moose penises?Kruelaid wrote:There may have been other contributing factors.Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.
My attorney has advised me not to answer that question.
Ethically Dubious Attorney |
Kruelaid wrote:My attorney has advised me not to answer that question.Celestial Healer wrote:I don't see how you're to blame... I mean what else were you going to do with all those degloved moose penises?Kruelaid wrote:There may have been other contributing factors.Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.
OBJECTION!
Ensirio the Longstrider |
Celestial Healer wrote:OBJECTION!Kruelaid wrote:My attorney has advised me not to answer that question.Celestial Healer wrote:I don't see how you're to blame... I mean what else were you going to do with all those degloved moose penises?Kruelaid wrote:There may have been other contributing factors.Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.
HOLD IT!
Ethically Dubious Attorney |
Ethically Dubious Attorney wrote:HOLD IT!Celestial Healer wrote:OBJECTION!Kruelaid wrote:My attorney has advised me not to answer that question.Celestial Healer wrote:I don't see how you're to blame... I mean what else were you going to do with all those degloved moose penises?Kruelaid wrote:There may have been other contributing factors.Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.
DOUBLE OBJECTION!
TAKE THAT!
Ensirio the Longstrider |
Ensirio the Longstrider wrote:Ethically Dubious Attorney wrote:HOLD IT!Celestial Healer wrote:OBJECTION!Kruelaid wrote:My attorney has advised me not to answer that question.Celestial Healer wrote:I don't see how you're to blame... I mean what else were you going to do with all those degloved moose penises?Kruelaid wrote:There may have been other contributing factors.Celestial Healer wrote:I thought Canada banned you because of that incident with the "sausages".Evil Lincoln wrote:The problem with the spiked chain is that it totally doesn't work as a weapon. If you knew about fighting like I do, you'd know that.Pfft. My spiked chain-wielding ability requires me to register myself with the US Department of Martial Enforcement as a lethal weapon, pursuant to the classified Exotic Weapons Protection Act of 1963. I am also barred entry in 12 countries, including Canada, because my spiked chain skills make me a clear and present danger.DOUBLE OBJECTION!
TAKE THAT!
NOT SO FAST!!
*throws the book at him*
Celestial Healer |
Paizo should totally hire me to be a consulting martial arts expert. I could make Pathfinder so much more realistic and cool.
Martial arts are weaksauce. Everybody knows wizards are better. That's why I gave up the spiked chain and went to the NSA's secret wizarding school in South Dakota and learned to be a utility caster.
I'm Tier 1 now. My top secret government security clearance says so.