Wuss. Wait till you trustingly let a female friend apply a waxing pad to the region just above your waist-line, telling you it's a form of heat-pack to deal with your strained back, rubbing it in .... then rips it off with great force, leaving you white and gasping for air on the ground as every male in the room winces and every female laughs long and loud.
2 months on, I still have a rectangular bald-patch on my back...
See, if only you could have acted like it didn't hurt, then stood up and looked at all the jaw-dropped women, and said "what?"
My little sister has threatened to do that to my face if I didn't shave before. I tend to bust out the razor at that point.
But yeah, hair + really sticky stuff = PAIN!
You both have my sympathies.
Let her know that she'll receive a Nair head shampooing, if she ever thinks about making good on that threat.
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Cosmo...you're not supposed to give them context!cosmo: Mountain Goats: "this Year"
robot chris: ooo
robot chris: Mountain Goats
...specifically: The Mountain Goats - "This Year"
Enjoy! :D
Yeah, but that was context worth sharing!!!
Cosmo...you're not supposed to give them context!cosmo: Mountain Goats: "this Year"
robot chris: ooo
robot chris: Mountain Goats
...specifically: The Mountain Goats - "This Year"
Enjoy! :D
Ah, but this is Cosmo. We don't know if that was the real actual context or a feint/misdirection to throw us off.
{sips Pepsi One} Ahhhh- wait, do I taste iocane pow- URGHK! {slumps over}
Cosmo...you're not supposed to give them context!cosmo: Mountain Goats: "this Year"
robot chris: ooo
robot chris: Mountain Goats
...specifically: The Mountain Goats - "This Year"
Enjoy! :D
Ah, but this is Cosmo. We don't know if that was the real actual context or a feint/misdirection to throw us off.
{sips Pepsi One} Ahhhh- wait, do I taste iocane pow- URGHK! {slumps over}
Hey -- you're not related to Pasta Slaad, are you? We went to high school together, and I've lost track... if you ARE a relative, please say hi for me. Thanx!
Well, hi there Alitan! My niece said you said 'hi'
Cosmo...you're not supposed to give them context!cosmo: Mountain Goats: "this Year"
robot chris: ooo
robot chris: Mountain Goats
...specifically: The Mountain Goats - "This Year"
Enjoy! :D
But, but Cosmo likes us.
Yeah I know, what was I thinking.
| 6 people marked this as a favorite. |
Chris Self: [redacted] uses Stack of Contracts on Paizo's Bank Account! It's super effective!
Crystal: Paizo's Bank Account's defense fell sharply
Chris Self: I'm checking its hit point total right now
Robot Chris: Chris Self has feinted. [redacted] takes half his money. Chris Self wakes up in hospital.
Erik Keith: Paizo Bank Account thrashes about violently, critical hit!
Erik Keith: Paizo Bank Account is injured in the process.
Crystal: Paizo's Bank Account is confused
Gary: I hate waking up in the hospital and they've taken all your weapons and you have to go outside and jack another car
Robot Chris: Paizo's Bank Account hits itself in confusion!
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Ryan Dancey: A lot of people would like to take a shot at me. I'm tempted to let them pay to do it.
I think we've discovered what Paizo's Kickstarter may be...
Ryan Dancey: A lot of people would like to take a shot at me. I'm tempted to let them pay to do it.I think we've discovered what Paizo's Kickstarter may be...
If Kickstarter looks like this, would this make into Shotstarter?
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Ryan Dancey: A lot of people would like to take a shot at me. I'm tempted to let them pay to do it.
The Man with the Golden OGL, starring Ryan Dancey as Scaramanga?
Me: ...Is that Rage Against the Machine, Gary?
PMG: ...Yes...
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Robot Chris: I have my check book...should I buy Girl Scout cookies?
Me: Yes. The Girl Scouts are awesome. It is known.
Robot Chris: Well, when you put it like that...
Mmmmm.....Thin Mints....
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Cosmo I look *great* in a leather skirt!
It's not a skirt. It's a kilt!
It's not a skirt. It's a kilt!
Not when Cosmo wears it, it isn't.
It's not a skirt. It's a kilt!That's not a kilt. It's a PTERUGES!
...it goes with my linothorax.
They have a cream for that
RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32
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It's not a skirt. It's a kilt!That's not a kilt. It's a PTERUGES!
The "s" is only for the plural, I believe.
Director of Sales
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| 6 people marked this as a favorite. |
.
.
Red Chris, The Robot: I'm tempted to add "Check the fridge for civilizations" to my calendar as a monthly appointment :\
Erik, The CS Algorithm: would they revere us as gods or would they fear us and plot our downfall...
Red Chris, The Robot: well, as a robot, these things are interchangeable
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Software Test Engineer
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| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Relevant video commentary
If I recall that very episode was brought into question during the discussion, but was quickly dismissed. I don't think I could concentrate on working if that was the thing responsible for the noises I hear in the air ducts once the sun goes down.
| 7 people marked this as a favorite. |
Re: News Post.
Sarah: God, who's going to get us pizza now!? We've hired Liz, and Mark, and now Daigle!
Pizza, who needs Pizza... How about a nice salad? Or maybe Lenten soup?
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Re: News Post.
Sarah: God, who's going to get us pizza now!? We've hired Liz, and Mark, and now Daigle!
Me ::looks solemnly at platinum Discover Card:: Gulp, can I get a side-order of imagination, skill, and just plain-old professionalism? No, no, send the breadsticks to Paizo. Yeah, that's right. Better make two sides of professionalism for me though.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
CONGRATS ADAM!
About time. I'll have a drink waiting for you at PaizoCon.
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Gary: If I ever write a parenting book, it will be called Blood and Screaming.
Ah, childbirth. That time when the husband is holding his dear lady, she turns around, looks tenderly into his eyes, sinks her nails into the flesh of his arms and screams "YOU DID THIS TO ME!"
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| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Re: News Post.
Sarah: God, who's going to get us pizza now!? We've hired Liz, and Mark, and now Daigle!
That's about the funniest thing I've read in a while!
Gary: If I ever write a parenting book, it will be called Blood and Screaming.
It should be subtitled things that can't be unseen.
| 4 people marked this as a favorite. |
Robot Chris: What if your friend gets stabbed in the ass? That's hospitable!
And potentially hospitalable.
Robot Chris: What if your friend gets stabbed in the ass? That's hospitable!And potentially hospitalable.
Oh very young
What will you leave us this timeYou're only dancing on this earth
For a short while
And though your dreams may toss
And turn you now.
They will vanish away -
Like your Daddy's best jeans
Denim blue fading up to the sky
And though you want him to last.
Forever you know he never will
(You know he never will)
And the patches
Make the goodbye harder still.
Crystal: >.>
Crystal: <.<
Crystal: He's going ape over it
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Crystal: >.>
Crystal: <.<
Crystal: He's going ape over it
CosMo JoJo?
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Senior Software Developer
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| 22 people marked this as a favorite. |
It lies in wait for the unsuspecting once again...
Soda Machine
XP 9,600
NE Large construct
Init –5; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision; Perception +2
Aura fear aura (5 ft., DC 10), frightful presence (5 ft., DC 25),
Defense
AC 26, touch 6, flat-footed 26 (+20 armor, +2 deflection, –5 Dex, –1 size)
hp 130 (+30)
Fort +13, Ref +9, Will +12
; Immune acid, cold, electricity, fire, poison, sonic, construct traits
Offense
Speed 0 ft.
Melee fall 24 (3d20+4/18–20)
Space 10 ft.; Reach 0 ft.
Special Attacks Dispense Soda, poison, rock throwing (0 ft.)
Tactics
Before Combat
Once filled, the Soda Machione lies in wait for unsuspecting Paizo employees
During Combat
Soda Machine uses its Dispense Soda attack whenever a Paizo employee puts a quarter in the slot and presses a button.
Morale
When bereft of all soda, Soda Machine will stop using its Dispense Soda attack.
Statistics
Str 16, Dex 1, Con 18, Int 1, Wis 14, Cha 1
Base Atk +0; CMB +4; CMD 11 (can't be tripped)
SQ compression, no breath
Special Abilities
Poison (Ex) Soda; save Fort DC 14; frequency 1/round for 6 rounds; effect 1d4 Con; cure 2 consecutive saves.
I am done with my development pass....
Jason
Soda Machine CR 10
XP 9,600
NE Large construct
Init –5; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision; Perception +2
Aura frightful presence (5 ft., DC 25),
DEFENSE
AC 26, touch 6, flat-footed 26 (+20 armor, +2 deflection, –5 Dex, –1 size)
hp 101 (13d10+30)
Fort +4, Ref –1, Will +6
Immune acid, cold, electricity, poison, sonic, construct traits
OFFENSE
Speed 0 ft. (can't move)
Melee fall +20 (3d10+12 plus poison/x3)
Space 10 ft.; Reach 10 ft.
Special Attacks Dispense Soda, poison, soda throwing (20 ft., as rock throwing, but only soda)
TACTICS
Before Combat Once filled, the Soda Machione lies in wait for unsuspecting Paizo employees
During Combat Soda Machine uses its Dispense Soda attack whenever a Paizo employee puts a quarter in the slot and presses a button.
Morale When bereft of all soda, Soda Machine will stop using its Dispense Soda attack.
STATISTICS
Str 26, Dex 1, Con —, Int —, Wis 14, Cha 1
Base Atk +13; CMB +22; CMD 27 (can't be tripped)
SQ compression, no breath
SPECIAL ABILITIES
Poison (Ex) Soda; save Fort DC 14; frequency 1/round for 6 rounds; effect 1d4 Con; cure 2 consecutive saves.DEVELOPER NOTES
- This stat block was really sloppy with numerous math and formatting errors. I am not even sure I caught them all in my brief pass.
- Send not to author asking what the intent was of the dispense soda special attack. As a note, I am not sure the compression ability is doing what the author intends. I mean, it has a compressor and all.. but thats not really the same thing.
- I do not recommend that we use this author again...
| 5 people marked this as a favorite. |
I have to wonder what Jason's doing to that machine to make it throw sodas 20 feet.
Can we just favorite the Jason's comment and ignore Cosmo's part?
