Overheard at the Paizo office


Off-Topic Discussions

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Paizo Employee Sales Associate

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Gary: i had to give up self preservation when my last canning experiment went horribly, horribly wrong

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Cosmo: Nothing is ever funnier, sexier, dirtier or scarier than what you leave up to the other person's imagination.

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Gary: ...and with cosmo you get all of the above.

Former VP of Finance

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Cosmo wrote:
Gary: i had to give up self preservation when my last canning experiment went horribly, horribly wrong

Megan: What were you canning?

Gary: Botulism! Fresh, tasty botulism!

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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ORDER SYSTEM: This order requires a shipping method.

Sara Marie: IT HAS A GJDKSFDSHH SHIPPING METHOD!

Gary: Well there's your problem right there...

Gary: we haven't used GJDKSFDSHH for years.

...

Sara Marie: -_-

Dark Archive

oh so GJDKSFDSHH is out dated? :P

Paizo Employee Chief Technical Officer

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ulgulanoth wrote:
oh so GJDKSFDSHH is out dated? :P

GJDKSFDSHH.1 was released ages ago.

Liberty's Edge

Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber

I think this is my favorite thread, always fun to catch up with it every so often. Funny stuff!

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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cosmo: giggling like an evil schoolgirl.

sara marie: nervously Why are you laughing like that?

cosmo: The Corebook is "In winkelwagen"!

sara marie: confusion

cosmo: It's "In wikelwagen"!


Are there poodles in Cosmo's winkelwagen too?

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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gary: wait everytime we type cosmo in the work chat his computer dings?

red chris: yep

...

Gary: Cosmo
Ding!

Liz: Cosmo
Ding!

Sara Marie: Cosmo
Ding!

Liz: Cosmo
Ding!

Gary: cosmo cosmo cosmo
Ding!Ding!Ding!

Sara Marie: Cosmo
Ding!

Blue Chris: comso
Ding!

Liz: cosmo
Ding!

Blue Chris: cosmo
Ding!

Red Chris: cosmo!
Ding!

Gary: COSMO IC MAN
Ding!

Ross Byers stabs everyone.

Blue Chris: Cosmo!!!!
Ding!

Cosmo Eisele is going home now.

Ross: Can you turn off the speakers before leaving?

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Sara Marie: Is paizo.com broken?

Ross: It wasn't me!

Ross: I'm breaking completely separate things in a self-contained miniature universe.


Sara Marie wrote:

gary: wait everytime we type cosmo in the work chat his computer dings?

red chris: yep

...

Gary: Cosmo
Ding!

Liz: Cosmo
Ding!

Sara Marie: Cosmo
Ding!

Liz: Cosmo
Ding!

Gary: cosmo cosmo cosmo
Ding!Ding!Ding!

Sara Marie: Cosmo
Ding!

Blue Chris: comso
Ding!

Liz: cosmo
Ding!

Blue Chris: cosmo
Ding!

Red Chris: cosmo!
Ding!

Gary: COSMO IC MAN
Ding!

Ross Byers stabs everyone.

Blue Chris: Cosmo!!!!
Ding!

Cosmo Eisele is going home now.

Ross: Can you turn off the speakers before leaving?

I like how Ross didn't say cosmo so it did not ding again.

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Megan (to Ross): I'm sorry! I didn't mean to discover new levels of screwed up!


Sara Marie wrote:
Megan (to Ross): I'm sorry! I didn't mean to discover new levels of screwed up!

LOL!

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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<CONVERSATION REDACTED>

Gary: I am picturing vic and lisa in the diner at the end of pulp fiction.

Gary: The part of jeff alvarez will be played by samuel L jackson.


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Dark Archive

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Liberation Front From Llama Liberation Fronts

Paizo Employee Senior Software Developer

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Pretty sure nobody here has ever overheard anything related to llamas.

Spoiler:
Except that one time:

"Wow, that would make an awesome llama avatar! But we can't, because of that rule we have."

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Gary Teter has gotten hisself into a pickle

Gary:i made the mistake of saying i'd write a blog

...

Gary: anybody wanna write a blog post?

The Exchange

Gary Teter wrote:

Pretty sure nobody here has ever overheard anything related to llamas.

** spoiler omitted **

Well there was that push by Court Fool a few years ago.


Pathfinder Companion, Maps Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
Sara Marie wrote:

Gary Teter has gotten hisself into a pickle

Gary:i made the mistake of saying i'd write a blog

...

Gary: anybody wanna write a blog post?

Just write it in Left handed binary, Gary!

Scarab Sages

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:
Gary: anybody wanna write a blog post?

I do it, but I doubt anyone would want to read "Mrgh. Mmmmm....brainnnnsss".


Xabulba wrote:

Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front

Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Free the Llamas Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation Front Llama Liberation...

Severed Llama head for you!


Xabulba wrote:
Llamas need liberating!!!!!!

I would respond with something to effect that Succubi are much worthier of attention, except for the fact that succubi are already about as liberated as it's possible for any entity to get; well, that is to say about as liberated as it's possible to get excepting three demon lords (whom I won't name here), because - let's face it - when all's said and done succubi do have considerable self-respect too, and there's only so far you can take being the one without having to make substantial cutbacks on the other...


Ask a Succubus wrote:
Xabulba wrote:
Llamas need liberating!!!!!!

I would respond with something to effect that Succubi are much worthier of attention, except for the fact that succubi are already about as liberated as it's possible for any entity to get; well, that is to say about as liberated as it's possible to get excepting three demon lords (whom I won't name here), because - let's face it - when all's said and done succubi do have considerable self-respect too, and there's only so far you can take being the one without having to make substantial cutbacks on the other...

LOL! Oh really my darling.


Ask a Succubus wrote:
Xabulba wrote:
Llamas need liberating!!!!!!

I would respond with something to effect that Succubi are much worthier of attention, except for the fact that succubi are already about as liberated as it's possible for any entity to get; well, that is to say about as liberated as it's possible to get excepting three demon lords (whom I won't name here), because - let's face it - when all's said and done succubi do have considerable self-respect too, and there's only so far you can take being the one without having to make substantial cutbacks on the other...

Equal rights for Incubi & llamas.

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Cosmo: ...and that's why god invented apathy.

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Cosmo: Here's where I put on my Paizo hat...

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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gary: cosmo, do not put on your robe and paizo hat plz

The Exchange

Sara Marie wrote:
gary: cosmo, do not put on your robe and paizo hat plz

Does it cause ethereal interference with the website?


Crimson Jester wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
gary: cosmo, do not put on your robe and paizo hat plz
Does it cause ethereal interference with the website?

Well, it does be made of the tin and the foil.

And we should only be hearin' the words of the pirate from the Flag Ship Paizo today. Arrr......


Sara Marie wrote:
gary: cosmo, do not put on your robe and paizo hat plz

But isn't that what working from home is all about?


Ahoy. This be Paizo Customer Service. What plunder do ye seek this fine day? We be havin' a sale on adventure for the hearty. Arrr.

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Caineach wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
gary: cosmo, do not put on your robe and paizo hat plz
But isn't that what working from home is all about?

If only cosmo worked from home... sigh... I can dream I suppose.

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Cosmo: Tee!
Cosmo: Emm!
Cosmo: Eye!

Sara Marie: El!
Sara Marie: Oh!
Sara Marie: El!


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Sara Marie wrote:

You always know a call is going to go great when it starts out like this:

phone rings

Megan: Good morning, Paizo Publishing this is Megan how can I help you?

...

Megan: We are a Role Playing Game company.

...

Megan: We publish books.

...

Megan: No, we don't have pizza.


Hudax's wife: I want to help the llamas!

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Cosmo: <redacted>

Cosmo: Also... that is NOT for the Overheard thread!

Paizo Employee Sales Associate

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Sara Marie wrote:

Cosmo: <redacted>

Cosmo: Also... that is NOT for the Overheard thread!

...

*sigh*

Former VP of Finance

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Sara Marie: "look with my hands and not with my mouth"
Sara Marie: thats ... just... dirty
Chris Self: that sounds...unsanitary
Chris Self: and...invasive
Cosmo: I said "look with my EYES and not my mouth". Still dirty, of course, but not as much.
Chris Lambertz: ... o_O
Sara Marie: Cosmo refering to looking up answer on internet instead of just asking me
Chris Self: Uh huh

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Cosmo: Why do I get the feeling this thread is becoming a mounting repository of evidence for my future HR case?

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

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Sara Marie wrote:
Cosmo: Why do I get the feeling this thread is becoming a mounting repository of evidence for my future HR case?

Cosmo: How did I know that was going to end up here?

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

5 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
Cosmo: Why do I get the feeling this thread is becoming a mounting repository of evidence for my future HR case?
Cosmo: How did I know that was going to end up here?

Cosmo: Stop it!

Paizo Employee Customer Service & Community Manager

12 people marked this as a favorite.
Sara Marie wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
Sara Marie wrote:
Cosmo: Why do I get the feeling this thread is becoming a mounting repository of evidence for my future HR case?
Cosmo: How did I know that was going to end up here?
Cosmo: Stop it!

Cosmo: I see what you're doing over there!

The Exchange

Did someone forget to lock their computer?

Former VP of Finance

Crimson Jester wrote:
Did someone forget to lock their computer?

Nope. These are all real quotes.

The Exchange

Chris Self wrote:
Crimson Jester wrote:
Did someone forget to lock their computer?
Nope. These are all real quotes.

How often do they throw things at each other?

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