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110 - Raise them to be very literate, even encourage them to be wizards. Tell them anyone that is illiterate is their sworn enemy and to be shown no mercy. Let them adventure a few times to gain wizard levels. Sic them on other, traditional goblins and let them go to town.
(We read, and our words are killing words).
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A series of questions for such a world as bolded above:
1) Are paladins born LG or can one make a decision and become LG?
2) Paladins are born LG, is it then impossible for them to fall?
3) Are all their acts good by definition?If any of the answers are yesses, it seems like a world with very limited storytelling power (not just for lack of falling paladins, but for the implications for personal growth/tragedy).
If the answer to 1 is no:
a) Should you wear hard hats in case of falling paladins?
b) Why doesn't it apply to other sentients?
Depends on the DMs interpretation of the world and how the gods work to be honest.
I read a setting where Orcs where created by their god, who wanted them to be evil, nothing else. They are designed by a divine entity to be evil incarnate and cannot be changed by anything short of powerful divine intervention.
Humans were created by a deity who believed in free will, and therefore created them with the capacity to choose their path in life, even if it meant being evil.
In that world, humans could be paladins if they made the choices to do so, but orcs could never be one as they were literally incapable of being good.
As for what constitutes an act of good, that completely comes down to the perception of the god you follow. For example, Torag would have no qualms for a Paladin killing every goblin they found and torturing them for information on other threats (check the code for paladins of Torag in the gods books). I', pretty sure the goddess of redemption would be all up in a Paladins Grill if they did and belonged to her faith though.
For me personally, my favourite setting was Eberron. It was a complete shades of grey game the way we played it. Orcs and goblinoids had their own nations and weren't evil as a nation at all. Dark elves weren't evil either, but all races could choose to be.
Other things were inherently evil though, but even then GM's and nations could work with them. Even the churches had evil people high up in the game. Me and my players enjoy that style.
There's another way to play though, and that can easily be the immutable gods created them this way. I'm good with either as long as I understand it going in.
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Depends on the DMs interpretation of the world and how the gods work to be honest.
I read a setting where Orcs where created by their god, who wanted them to be evil, nothing else. They are designed by a divine entity to be evil incarnate and cannot be changed by anything short of powerful divine intervention.
Humans were created by a deity who believed in free will, and therefore created them with the capacity to choose their path in life, even if it meant being evil.
In that world, humans could be paladins if they made the choices to do so, but orcs could never be one as they were literally incapable of being good.
As for what constitutes an act of good, that completely comes down to the perception of the god you follow. For example, Torag would have no qualms for a Paladin killing every goblin they found and torturing them for information on other threats (check the code for paladins of Torag in the gods books). I', pretty sure the goddess of redemption would be all up in a Paladins Grill if they did and belonged to her faith though.
For me personally, my favourite setting was Eberron. It was a complete shades of grey game the way we played it. Orcs and goblinoids had their own nations and weren't evil as a nation at all. Dark elves weren't evil either, but all races could choose to be.
Other things were inherently evil though, but even then GM's and nations could work with them. Even the churches had evil people high up in the game. Me and my players enjoy that style.
There's another way to play though, and that can easily be the immutable gods created them this way. I'm good with either as long as I understand it going in.
When it comes to paladin conundrums and the like, I err on the side of "What's their deity?"
"Paladins gain power from the concepts of lawfulness and goodness themselves!" just comes across as a trite way to complicate the issue even more than it already is.
catapult
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113. Set up a carefully organized study tracking a large number of goblin infants as they are raised in a diverse range of potential childhood environments. Using the power of Science, settle once and for all whether goblins can be raised to become nonevil in your GM's campaign setting!
Publish your results widely in-character, so that future adventurers, i.e. your future PCs, will have a clear answer to this dilemma for all future time.
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114. Drop them on the doorstep of Father Not Your Problem Anymore.
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If the aliens aren't alien, if they don't think and behave differently than humans why have them?So people can play someone who doesn't look human.
And so that there's somebody to dual-wield all these scimitars.
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How would that happen? The half-breed I mean. With dragons it's because they can change shape out the wazoo. With a half-drow / half-frost giant, either the mother wouldn't survive (if drow) or the father would have had death by snu snu. (Frankly - I've always thought of half-giants being silly for that reason.)
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How would that happen? The half-breed I mean. With dragons it's because they can change shape out the wazoo. With a half-drow / half-frost giant, either the mother wouldn't survive (if drow) or the father would have had death by snu snu. (Frankly - I've always thought of half-giants being silly for that reason.)
Prodigous use of "enlarge"-spells should do the trick.
Use them as ammo for siege weapons!
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*sniff* Zizel remember cage sister. She was cowering with me when the soldiers found us. *Sniff*
The sword went through her, she squeaked and then gurgled. I was so scared. I closed my eyes, waiting for it to come my way as I heard it being takin' back.
"There, there. Your safe with me now. Safe with Amonima."
They said horrible things, that I was a halfling! A half wit halfling!! They dragged me out of the little hole we was in, and shackled me, led me to this awful place with it's walls and hallways.
"You will get used to them, Zizel. Hush, hold on to me and relax..."
Why? Why the babies? Why....
As a DM I would love to see such a character as this presented to me by a player, that is a brilliant background. More it offers an understandable moral outlook on the subject involving killing baby goblins, even it it is against the norm.
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121 no such thing as baby Goblins - they spawn fully formed from the bacterial ooze ponds/rubbish heap/Latrines.
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122. The goblin baby is inside a gazebo. Your move, motherf!**er.
It's a trick question, there are no goblin "babies" just smaller goblins, capable of arson and murder within hours of their unleashing.
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I meant DM not D&D, not sure how that happened... sighs I really wish there was a more open editing allowance, for members to go back and fix errors they see after posting but after the time normally allowed for editing.
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On topic I find this whole justifying killing baby goblins harmful to roleplaying in general, allowing for players to kill and slaughter while still thinking they are the heroes. Sure, in many times it is okay to justify the killing of monsters but goblins I never say as a race that should be inheritable evil and nonredeemable.
Sure in fantasy there should be absolutes for good and evil, but questions of morality and of right and wrong can still add for a enriched roleplay, counting whether or not one should kill baby goblins. A DM should just make sure players understand that using such a scenario isn't a bad thing in all cases. I have actually read an example where it was handled well.
It was where the party killed an orc and on searching the body finding a letter, or series of letters, explaining how the orc had a family and that how he had been trying to prove himself not an example of the evil known of his race. Having worked hard to prove himself, to not be discriminated against, that he had been working for a wizard in the dungeon that the party were in but how it was his last day working and he would be returning home to his family. The letter moved the players, and through such the characters, so much they went on a quest to make up for killing the orc though the details of such escape me.
Sighs, I wish I could find the source.
124. Take them adventuring with you. Send them off to play in the trap filled passageway.
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The one thing I don't get about the whole "make a race evil so you don't have to feel bad about killing them" is why it has to be a race. I mean there are well-established memes that killing Nazis is okay, so why not make the "always evil" guys an organization? It's at least a bit less unfortunate implications to justify that anyone who wears a Team Evil T-shirt can be offed without moral quandaries (even though realistically that's not the case).
Seconded hard. That's how it typically works in my homebrew.
And on a related note, %*#& the Thalmor.
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I find it funny how so many are saying their is no such thing as baby goblins, somehow I feel this is so they can justify killing them without bothering with the moral implications of such. I as a D&D, wouldn't allow a player to justify it in such a way.
Some of us play the game to escape the shittyness of the real world. It's is understood in our group that throwing moral dilemmas of this kind is not welcome in any way. So standard set up is there is no such thing baby Goblinoids.
If we want to get into anguish and dispair we play WOD
I find it bemusing that if a group of people want thier game to be beer and pretzels with lots of laughs, they are considered to be a lesser or lower order of gamers, compared to "real ROLE players".
Smells like elitism and snobbery to me.
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I find it funny how so many are saying their is no such thing as baby goblins, somehow I feel this is so they can justify killing them without bothering with the moral implications of such. I as a D&D, wouldn't allow a player to justify it in such a way.Some of us play the game to escape the s&~*tyness of the real world. It's is understood in our group that throwing moral dilemmas of this kind is not welcome in any way. So standard set up is there is no such thing baby Goblinoids.
If we want to get into anguish and dispair we play WOD
I find it bemusing that if a group of people want thier game to be beer and pretzels with lots of laughs, they are considered to be a lesser or lower order of gamers, compared to "real ROLE players".
Smells like elitism and snobbery to me.
It's not that they are lesser, they are less likely to take things so seriously. Or proceed to get riled up and say others are lesser.
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Some of us play the game to escape the s*%@tyness of the real world. It's is understood in our group that throwing moral dilemmas of this kind is not welcome in any way. So standard set up is there is no such thing baby Goblinoids.
If we want to get into anguish and dispair we play WOD
I find it bemusing that if a group of people want thier game to be beer and pretzels with lots of laughs, they are considered to be a lesser or lower order of gamers, compared to "real ROLE players".
Smells like elitism and snobbery to me.
I do not consider any roleplayers who like their games to beer and pretzels with lots of laughs to be a lesser/lower order of gamers and has nothing to do with this... at least I feel it has nothing to do with such.
I will say it is unwise and unrealistic to encouraging thoughtless killing and butchering because it is somehow funner or simpler. As a DM or player I would much prefer a game that lets me think and use my head, not just offer something for me to kill and treasure to collect.
Also moral dilemmas don't have to involving adding in the s@@~tynessof the real world or having the campaign be like World of Darkness, a game I actually like because of the richness of the setting, and I feel can actually enhance a game by having players think of their actions and consider the consequences for them.
Do not assume elitism and snobbery where such may not be the case.
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Well, my standard setup is "Goblinoids do have babies, but since you're not going to be slaughtering entire villages full of people, the crappy moral dilemma isn't going to come up."
If you do start slaughtering entire villages full of goblinoids, despite a lack of GM cues to do so, you'll have issues well before you get to the babies.
It does bother me that it's not uncommon for modules to be written such that the good and necessary thing to do is mass slaughter.
^ I agree with this, very much so.
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That moment when people get super serious in a joke thread.
125: Napalm them. Goblins love fire, so they approve.
Goblin Salsa
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127: Take advantage of their propensity for junk-sifting: create a simple Prestidigitation-powered Pavlovian magic item that rewards them with flavored food for correctly sorting your settlement's trash and recycling.
(for the philosophically Axis-inclined)
128: Use a permanent image of a fiendish advanced extra-scary horse constantly pursuing them to keep them running on a hamster wheel that powers your mad science clockwork automaton of doom.
(for the aspiring BBEG)
129: breast feed them
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Nazi Babies was, surprisingly, not the worst rip-off of Muppet Babies. That award goes to Transmetropolitan Babies, which was so bad it resulted in the development of time travel to go back in time and stop it from being made.
the most tasteless Muppet Babies rip-off goes to Sexy babies it was so tasteless they had to age them a couple years and rebrand it as Bratz
now you know.... the rest of the story.
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129: breast feed them
NO