Pathfinders Against Humanity

Black cards:

The next Mendevian Crusade will be known as the ___________ Crusade.
The local language is __________.
The party was chased out of town cause the ___________ tried to ___________.
I failed a __________ check and was _________ed.
___________ is now leader of the ___________ faction.
___________ got drunk and founded the __________ faction.
__________ passed the Test of the Starstone and became a living god of _____________.
Why I’m not allowed back at the Heidmarch Manor.
Why I was excommunicated from the Church of Razmir.
Razmir is really a __________.
How the Worldwound was sealed.
Chase Scene: Pass a 10 DC _____________ check or a 20 DC ___________ check.
Right before he died, the bard yelled _________.
The party’s real healer.
The final encounter in the scenario was ___________.
The entire party died fighting _______ and ________.

White Cards:

A level 20 goblin commoner
The Silver Mount exploded
Cleric of Aroden
Sorcerer with a Wand of Lesser Infernal Healing
Goblins
More Goblins
5 Paladins and a Bard
A Young Ancient Dragon
Advanced Giant Dwarf

White cards...

Edition wars.
Trolling the Paizo messageboards.
The random prostitute table.
Hitting on the GM.
F.A.T.A.L.
Pleading for mercy.
A succubus with a rope of entanglement.
James Jacobs.
Rappan Athuk.
Psionics.
Pesh addicts.
An evangelist of Arshea.
Max damage.
Farting at the game table.
Killing it with fire.
Hero points.
Asheia, the Sword of Lust.
A severed head.
Staking a vampire.
Boning the barmaid.
Spelljammer.
Demons.

People are double doing some things, so I'm going to try this without reading the topic.

Black cards
My last campaign was derailed by
A god can be killed by
The big bad figure will be represented by

White cards
A dire Wraith
A critical fumble(That's rolling a 20, then a 1)
Game Balance
Everyone had to move far, far, away
People getting a life
They ascended to a plane you cannot understand
The Wormlord
Hasbro's Copyrights
A half dragon kobold sorcerer

I can't read people's black cards without thinking of more white cards!

A Poo Golem
Your daughter's Ponyfinder character
Your creepy uncle's Ponyfinder character
A gazebo
A Grazebrou misspelled as a Gazebo

Thanks for all the help!

I have my draft set ready for printing - anyone else wanting a copy should be able to find it by following this link

https://drive.google.com/file/d/0B6dCbf89CkdXSnFMOVNINmVJY0U/edit?usp=shari ng

Looks like all black cards.

this is similar to the fnorder...
a ratio of 10 answers(White) to 1 question(Black).

WHITE
> one more Prestige than I have
> (that was) banned 3 days ago on the Additional Resources page
> not PFS legal yet
> just repeating what a *notable* designer said 6 years ago in the message boards
> (that's) totally RAW
> 'cause it's just too awesome!
> don't be a jerk
> goblin baby diapers
> razmiran pleasure barge
> (a) pile o Bards
> honest peasant in the world wound
> rule lawyers make better lovers
> slightly pregnant has no mechanical impact
> casting without being noticed
> calistrian virgin
> worship 3 deities for no mechanical benefit
> my Vanity is a Portable Potty
> Bag of Devouring & Regurgitation
> Spellbook of the Neophyte
> Two left Boots of Dancing
> chocolate coated Miracle Pill with added fiber
> faster than Play By Post
> it's never too late!

Black
Inside the chest is...

White
A bag of instant water pills
MY MOM!
The holy hand grenade
An admantine butterknife
A spellbook with Summon Adventurer 1-9 in it(In Golarion, monsters summon you!)
A tiny coffee golem
A crate full of twinkies
A barrel containing only a potion of cure light wounds
10000 copper pieces
A sombrero of disguise

Black:

Caldey Cayden went sober after seeing_____
_______ was the only thing the shadow lodge body recovery team found
_____ was written on the birthday cake.

White:

A message board clarification
an FAQ
rules as intented
rules as written
RAW steak and eggs
a yellow tengu
a masterwork diplomacy tool
a six tailed kitsune
a disney character knock off
an x men character knock off
someone elses intellectual property
a heist mission
a breath of life scroll
a potion of fly
a potion sponge
a four pound brick of pesh
Flayleaf
a pot zombie
a pot zombie swarm
candiru
table variance
a rules lawyer
a short rules lawyer
a short rules layer eating doughnut holes

Black
The Dark Mysterious Stranger appears and...

White
Only available at conventions
Tries to slap you with a tuna
Fires a magic missile wand at you
Gives you the plot hook you missed before
Does the hokey pokey
Offers everyone a swig from his little brown jug
Summons a Shogoth
Tries to interview everyone
Drops a rolled up map like a microphone in a rap battle
Delivers a package from a long dead oracle

Black:
He tried to kill me! With a _____!

A _____ approaches you, but it turns out it's actually Drandle Dreng.

Why did Zarta keep you late last night?

Grandmaster Torch wants me to _____ if I want his _____.

The new Order of the ______'s Edicts are to ______, defend ____ to the death, to never under any circumstances _____, and to always act in the best interests of _____.

I just don't understand why ______ is considered an Evil act....

We Be _____, You Be ____!!!

Unchain the _____!

I can prove it objectively, because _______.

Chriz Lambertz chastised us all for __________.

The ______ are way too _____!

The new book's influences include _______, _____, and _____, as well as ______, which earned it a lot of unfair complaints.

Why is there no "______" feat?

_______ has had a visibly corrosive influence on gaming as a whole.

NO, you CANNOT use the _____ spell to _______!

I wonder what Comrade Anklebiter would think about _____?

I wonder what Caesar Slaad would think about _____?

What happened to Mikaze?

What happened to DM Under the Bridge?

What really happened to Ihys?

White:

punching out a camel

Self Destruct Code 0-0-1

blatant anachronism

subtle anachronism

plausible anachronism

milk

Constitution-based magic

Poog

liquefied onyx

Razmir

the deeply disturbed mind of an Ancient Osirian architect

The Loving Place

a Fighter in a bathtub

the iterative attack system

5th-grade pre-algebra

Eric Mona's Theosophic literature collection

the Pesh Addict trait

Quatloos

players too young to remember the Clinton Presidency

players too young to remember the Reagan Presidency

players too old to have been influenced by Pokémon

players too old to have been influenced by the Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers

players who have never seen a single episode of My Little Pony

the Anime-niacs

invalid comparisons to real-world events

wholly valid comparisons to real-world events

the smartest person at the table

our local Venture-Captain

a grumpy response from James Jacobs

Hiding In Your Closet

Groetus

an entire party of vigilantes
a social identity
the red raven
a candle
zombie powered rickshaw
half of an adamantine greatsword
clear spindle ioun stone
a paladins detect evil
overwhelming evil
troll autoharuspicy
a murder of tengu

any reference to dalphine affair.
pathfinders at weddings.
clw wands.
delectable flesh morsel/puppet
carydid column. misspelled I am sure.

I attack__________

(best answered by)
The darkness

Also acceptable: the gazebo.

it's ALIVE! It's alive... hahaahahaahahaaa

Black cards:

The final boss fight was ______
______ has been "disappeared"!
Curse your sudden but inevitable ______
The Devil We Know, part 5: _________
Janira Gavix told us to do ________

White cards:

Adril Hestrom
a beheaded faction leader
a traitor within the Pathfinder Society
Paracountess Zarta Dralneen
Ambrus Valsin
(for that matter, all the faction leaders, past and present, should be in here)
5 prestige for body recovery.
The Blackros twins
GM not following the tactics as written
Explore, Report, Cooperate
Riddywhipple

White Card:

Baron Jacquo's Teapot
Zarta's Whip Collection
A trunk full of Colson Maldriss's dead prostitutes
Ambrus Valsin's moustache wax

Black Cards:

nosig derailed the latest thread on ___________ by bringing up Take 10.
Explore, Report, Cooperate, _____________!
The newest scenario's hard mode gives the final boss _______________.
The thing I miss the most about Kyle Baird scenarios is _____________.
________________!, Roll for initiative.

White Cards:
An out-of-character discussion about the last scenario you played in
Con Crud
GM Convention Rewards
Aasimar Bloat
Scotty's Brewhouse, the day before GenCon
Buggernaughts
The Young Template making a fight harder.
The Pickled Imp
Cayden Cailien's Lost Loincloth
Parani Akar, Right Behind You
The Unkillable Delnario Teppish
Beaky III
An Alignment Discussion
Temmel Passad
Literal Murderhoboes
Profession (Torturer)
Your Backstory
Darkness Rules
ACG (Advanced Class Guide)
ACG (Adventure Card Game)
ACG (Adventure Card Guild)
Shax's House of Pain
The Aspis Consortium
The Kortos Consortium
Putting the Aspis Consortium alongside the Kortos Consortium in an evergreen scenario.
Joe Caubo's Dead Cleric
Okay People in Real Life that Annoy the Crap out of You On the Forums
Bees?

Black Cards
Things that destroy the game or game world
What should we, what can we, do about all these cultists
When you plant a bean, this grows from it

White cards
Vigilante registration act
Inception Sleep Spell(Stacking of course)
Devil fruit powers
Homebrew Mutations
Homebrew Rituals
No homebrew rule
Papers and Paychecks
Jumanji
The Cleaves is complete and needs playtesting!
Greater Curse
Greater Enlarge
Greater Haste
The Extraordinary Raise Dead Pill
"Hang in there baby" Kitten poster
The power of friendship
The lost parts of friendship
Satiric Cutie Mark
Ink Blot Test
Portable Sun Lamp
Portable Moon Lamp
Lama Milk Vision Potion
The Troll Bridges of Madison County
Dragons and Unicorns living together
Competitive Monster Summoning

Squealy Nord!

Worth a lot of XPs

White card: The entire party, disguised as six Drendle Drengs.
(true story)

Black:

I can't believe the dm let you fit a _______ in a spring loaded wrist sheath

_____ does not provide a circumstance bonus on __________

_____ was instrumental in getting our second prestige point

Colson Maldris had us kill someone over _________

The glee in the paracountesses eyes when we brought her ________ made me a little nervous

White

a dog wearing a pig costume
Clown school vanity
an opera
a business
a caravan
knock spell
the take 10 rules
alternating current
a potion of see invisibility
hard mode
easy mode
caster martial disparity
lightning rod
Magnimar
Absolom
The petals district
The rose quarter
The puddles
The coins
the docks
The bears
5 pounds of bat guano
Sovereign glue
Universal solvent
Goblin fertility statue
Magical chest
Monks robes
Beads of force
an adamantine shovel
a mithral waffle iron
an entire dojo of monks
a kavetch of magi
a school of wizards
a troop of fighters
a league of vigilanti
a seance of spiritualists
a circle of occultists
a meme of spiritualists
a gagle of sorcerers
a band of bards

Black:

Great. Just what we needed...A ___________.

Funny...she doesn't look ______.

You enter Grandmaster Torch's chamber while he is playing with a _______.

No, sir! I didn't catch you _________ again, sir!

A _________ that had been on display at the Blakros Museum has ________!

To become a Hellknight, you must _________.

_________ will see this insult repaid in kind!

We found this in some Numerian ruins. We think it's called a "______," and it's intended for ________.

________ endorses the practice of ______, whereas ______ violently opposes it. ______ tries to seek a "middle ground" on the matter, while _______ ceased the practice years and years ago.

___________, let down your ________!

_______ your ______, Sir William, I cannot wait 'till _____!

If I said you _______, would you _______?

My ______ is full of _______.

...and then _____ said, "That was no ______, that was my wife!"

White:

bachelor snuff

a brain in a jar

the night life on Aballon

a non-Evil Assassin

several mint-condition copies of Elves of Golarion

Dhampir Trail Rations

a suspiciously similar concept published about a year earlier in a book by 4 Winds Fantasy Gaming

Bleached Otyugh

an obscure monster from pre-Roman Iberian mythology

a Human ethnicity with no clear real-world counterpart

a 70-year-old Elf

the Kundalini Chakra system

backwards-compatibility

the Witch spell list

an obscure Monty Python reference

a sly nod to the Furry community

rich parents

Alchemical Power Components

intellectual property disputes with Wizards of the Coast

The Dog Pharaoh

Andoran's rightful monarch

a Luckstone

a Jingasa of the Fortunate Soldier

a Traveler's Any-Tool

a Chaos Emerald

norms of sexual behavior in Golarion

the Esoteric Order of the Palatine Eye

some connection between Rovagug and Groetus

some connection between Rovagug and Asmodeus

some connection between Rovagug and Desna

Comrade Lenin's class levels

We Be Goblins, you be ________ !

With the Bards on strike, we'll all have to make due with Inspire ______ !

In this round of the Ruby Phoenix Tournament, the Pathfinders will face off against ________ !

Aroden's last meal: ________ .

The secret true reason behind the Lirgen space program: _______ .

Mike Bramnik wrote:

I attack__________

(best answered by)
The darkness

Also acceptable: the gazebo.

But...but that's not a Dead Alewives reference!

White cards
Dead Alewives on the shore
Opened Heart Chakra(So Hum)
Always open your Heart Chakra first
Opened Base Chakra(Shevum Shantie)
Opened Groin ChakraMono Ramun)
Opened Solar Plexus Chakra(Rom)
Opened Opened throat Chakra(Aim)
Opened Brow Chakra(Pragna Sukanunum)
Opened Crown Chakra(Om Arhum Nama)
The teachings of Robert Mitra
The Thought Forms Plane by Ledbetter
Beyond coincidence: one man's experiences with psychic phenomena by Alex Tanous, Harvey Ardman.
Pearl of Wisdom that gives good advice
Pearl of Foolishness that gives bad advice

white

I can't believe its not _______
Nobody doesn't like ________
________ really killed aroden
Aroden will return for ____________

BlacK

elven
dwarven
a skulk of kitsune
a trunk of wayang
a smithy of dwarves
a prance of elves
a bask of nagaji
a murder of tengu
a quiet of halflings
an inn of adventurers
a herd of half orcs
a garden of gnomes
a gift of Magi
shocking grasp
Captain andor's returning shield
Thor, warpriest of Thor
a synthesist summoner
a brute alchemist
anti fungal ointment
a purchased spellbook
hair of the dog
master of trade
discount alchemist fire
Kyra clone 47924
a cloning vat

BlacK

I can't believe its not _______
Nobody doesn't like ________
________ really killed aroden
Aroden will return for ____________

white

elven
dwarven
a skulk of kitsune
a trunk of wayang
a smithy of dwarves
a prance of elves
a bask of nagaji
a murder of tengu
a quiet of halflings
an inn of adventurers
a herd of half orcs
a garden of gnomes
a gift of Magi
shocking grasp
Captain andor's returning shield
Thor, warpriest of Thor
a synthesist summoner
a brute alchemist
anti fungal ointment
a purchased spellbook
hair of the dog
master of trade
discount alchemist fire
Kyra clone 47924
a cloning vat

Fixed that in spite of you. :p

Black
Fnord means

White
Fnord

Master of the Fallen _______
The Many _______ of Grandmaster Torch

generic masterwork tool
Ekkie the goblin
necklace of fireballs
maggot covered body of a dead raven
kobold at the opera
unpronounceable gnome names
goblin race boon

________ and pfs
this years specail is all about ________
year of the _________
_______ and _________ slash chronicle fiction
Eando Clines lost chronicle was really about ________
The password was_______
________ for life
The list city of _______________________

diplomat
diplomancer
bluff check
swim check
light and darkness rules
Stealth rules
Pheasant under glass
emergency force fear
Druids For the Ethical Treatment of Animal Companions
Barding
Animal companion item slots
A nagaji paladin
The annual checkers tournament
Paracountess Bingo
A waterproof bag
A severed head
6 and a half severed heads
shave and a haircut
The shadow lodge

Ok, Lucas Servideo and I are going to modernize this process. Please place your submissions here:

Black Card Idea Submission Form

White Card Idea Submission Form

Once submitted, they will be edited, compiled, and made into a bunch of awesome cards. At that point, we'll release the PDF to everyone on this forum, free of charge as a community use project.

Thanks for your contribution, and I think we're all really going to enjoy this!

Can we still see submissions posted here after they're submitted to your form? They've been hilarious reads.

Hmm

Ok, Lucas Servideo and I are going to modernize this process. Please place your submissions here:

Black Card Idea Submission Form

White Card Idea Submission Form

Once submitted, they will be edited, compiled, and made into a bunch of awesome cards. At that point, we'll release the PDF to everyone on this forum, free of charge as a community use project.

Thanks for your contribution, and I think we're all really going to enjoy this!

I tried to submit Poo Golem and it wouldn't let me enter any text.

Andrew Hoskins wrote:

Ok, Lucas Servideo and I are going to modernize this process. Please place your submissions here:

Black Card Idea Submission Form

White Card Idea Submission Form

Once submitted, they will be edited, compiled, and made into a bunch of awesome cards. At that point, we'll release the PDF to everyone on this forum, free of charge as a community use project.

Thanks for your contribution, and I think we're all really going to enjoy this!

I tried to submit Poo Golem and it wouldn't let me enter any text.

I submitted a couple of test items just now in anonymous browsers and it worked. Try again?

The submission thing is a white box on a white background. Takes a little clicking to get it to go off

I had to click on where it actually says enter your suggestion. The box below that is an illusion.

Black Card
You awaken from a dream about...

White Cards
Getting lost at school
Getting lost on your way somewhere
Running from bullies who are giants
Rapping Drow
A musical about death
Your past life as a monster
A possible TPK in your near future
Meeting your dead Mom and trying to hug her
A dream, within a dream, within a dream,...
Your dead father who can't seem to answer any questions

White cards:

a dragon zombie pretending to be alive by wearing a hat of disguise
a CR 13 encounter in a level 1-5 adventure

Black Cards
(Blank) in the title means (blank)
Trueseeing reveals

White Cards
Chaos gods
Warhammer first edition conversions
Squid headed monsters
Arkam house really owns it
Carnivors with displacement
Floating Eyeballs
Pulp Science Fiction
YDKJ
Computer Game Title
Suggestions welcome
Strike that, reverse it
A Harpy wearing a hat of disguise
A Lamia wearing a mask of humanity
A seven percent solution potion(of morphine)
A succubus wearing an amulet of non detection
Polymorphic sentient rocks
Aunt Grandma
Everybody's Uncle Grandpa
Narlotep's true form
1D6 sanity converted to mythos

Auntie Baltwin
Robots in a medieval fantasy setting
a grippli alchemist throwing bombs from above

White
Undead that do not know they are dead
Androids that do not know they are androids
Machine envy
Humans cosplaying as monsters
Deiphobia

Black
An invitation to...

White
A dog eating festival
Goblin fertility rite
Dwarven drinking contest
Hearts and Hooves day
A dying paralel timeline
My nightmare
The suburban jungle
A vampire lord's annual funeral
The Mummy's day parade
The Gnomish Baseball Plain's series.
The 1000th strip Rusty and Co.
+1 Bart Simpson

Black

> Grandmaster Torch always has 2 big halforc bodyguards in his bath for ______.
> Zarta Dralneen just jilted ______ in favor of ______.
> Immediate actions can take place during the ______ action.
> Your supplication to marry a Blackros is ______.
> _______ was the latest ban request.
> Min/Maxers ain't got nuthin on my ______.

Black
The next Glory Con will include_________.

White
Template stacking contest
Homebrew monster fashion show
RPG superstar finals
A LARP about a treaty meeting between the 3 kingdoms
Adventure path that includes one clue about Aroden
Charity auction including artwork from Rise of the Runelords
Foam rubber dogslicers
Foam rubber starknives
Gameroom with Pathfinder card games
This game you are playing right now
Filk only karaoke lounge

Aroden was actually killed by ______

Auntie Baltwin

Robots in a medieval fantasy setting
a grippli alchemist throwing bombs from above

wow... I made it to a card!

Aroden was actually killed by ______

Game Developers

And here I thought I would find camaraderie here among non-humans in working to halt the human infestation of Golarion.

Black
The ________ infestation of Golarion

White
Human
Goblin Barbarian
Drop Bear
Sasquatch
Anime Catgirl
Hardliner Drow
Murder Hobos who embrace the stereotype
H***** cultists
Thin skinned heterosexual elves
Far Right Dwarves