I worry that Urgathoa beefing it leaves Team Bad Guy a little empty in the Core 20. Asmodeus, Lamashtu, Norgorber, Zon-Kuthon, and an imprisoned Rovagug is kind of a thin rogue's gallery.
Losing a more 'heroic' deity feels more interesting.
I wonder if Rovagug would drop out of the 20 core gods. Not that he isn't a big deal in the setting he is, but he isn't really one that players should be worshiping and one that basically is outlawed for good reason everywhere. I could make a follower of Nogober, Urgathoa, Zon-Kuthon, Asmodeus, or even Lamashtu that could be played and part of a group. Might be tricky and difficult to work, but it is possible. Rovagug on the other hand I don't think can really be done.
and to me the core 20 should be deities that the players look at having as patrons.
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I worry that Urgathoa beefing it leaves Team Bad Guy a little empty in the Core 20. Asmodeus, Lamashtu, Norgorber, Zon-Kuthon, and an imprisoned Rovagug is kind of a thin rogue's gallery.
Losing a more 'heroic' deity feels more interesting.
I wonder if Rovagug would drop out of the 20 core gods. Not that he isn't a big deal in the setting he is, but he isn't really one that players should be worshiping and one that basically is outlawed for good reason everywhere. I could make a follower of Nogober, Urgathoa, Zon-Kuthon, Asmodeus, or even Lamashtu that could be played and part of a group. Might be tricky and difficult to work, but it is possible. Rovagug on the other hand I don't think can really be done.
and to me the core 20 should be deities that the players look at having as patrons.
if you are playing in an evil campaign, Rovagug sure sounds pretty awesome as a choice of deity.
He's also literally 'central' to the Golarion setting, being that Rovagug is trapped in the core of the planet.
I have no idea how you would play an adherent of Rovagug who is not an actual maniac. But you're not killing Rovagug because of his centrality to the setting.
I have no idea how you would play an adherent of Rovagug who is not an actual maniac. But you're not killing Rovagug because of his centrality to the setting.
I mean, maniacs are pretty much what Rovagug is built for. He's the guy the Mad Max-style painted warriors on flamethrower diesel trucks would chant, the ultimate nihilism. If you want some more structured evil, you look elsewhere - Urgathoa or Lamashtu. But even then, you could argue Lamashtu and her followers fill an at least adjacent niche, rejecting society and its structures, comforts and strictures.
But yes, even if he drops out of the Top 20 I doubt Rovagug is beefing it. That kinda thing has to be a MAJOR event, possible an edition-closer like Tar-Baphon was for 1e, you keep that in your pocket until you need a real status quo shaker to close out on.
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Zyphus slips in the shower!
ok like, i do this ONCE and then everybody gotta make a whole "big" "deal" out of it. and THEN i gotta say some Curse Words to ph----ma about it and then i wind up sleeping over at urgathoa's for a few ages or whatever
not doin it again sorry. find someone else. like go look at ghlaunder dude maybe TAKE a shower for once in ur life, u stink bro
I think it's going to be Asmodeus. I've heard (secondhand, maybe it's in a post idunno) that designers said it wasn't going to be due to licensing issues and I'm sure it isn't, but he's like, almost the exact same guy across the street in D&D's settings. Many of the other archdevils could take his prominence in the setting without necessarily becoming gods and expanding deviltry to focus on the other archdevils would have some upsides.
I certainly think it would spice up Cheliax.
But there's a few of gods that (to me) seem like they haven't really...done much, like not appearing in adventure paths or having a following that pushes things along in the setting. Gozreh seems like you could knock out and just replace with a "nature" force.
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My bet is also on Asmodeus. Not because of licensing issues necessarily - I think I heard somewhere that whatever god it will be, it won't be because of that, but I can't attest to the validity of that statement and can't remember exactly where I got it from. But for one, I think Cheliax has kind of had its time in the sun - Council of Thieves, Hell's Rebels/Hell's Vengeance, etc. - and without spoilers, things aren't really going well for the forces of diabolic evil recently. Also, with the removal of slavery from Cheliax in 2e, and since some of the core elements of Asmodean worship involve slavery, giving him the boot wouldn't be out of the question.
And like Atavist said, there are plenty of other archdevils to take over! It happens all the time down there. Maybe we're in for a new era of Eiseth the Girlboss Queen of Hell?
If its Desna, Sarenrae or Shelyn I will cry ugly tears. Don't you dare, Paizo, don't you dare!
Addendum: It's awfully suspicious that Razmir's making moves right now with all this coming up. Replacement for the roll of God of Magic? He's also is famous for his mask, and being generally a sneaky, greedy, deceitful lil... uh, so-and-so. New Norgorber replacement? Or maybe he'll just fall in the pit. Please fall in the pit.
A few interesting pieces of the puzzle from
today’s stream: Lost Omens: Divine Mysteries is a 2024 book with a psychopomp narrator, aimed at bringing Gods & Magic into the Remaster and expanding on it. The cover shows a suspiciously alive-looking Arazni (stated to be joining the Core 20!) standing in front of stained glass depictions of Asmodeus (right), Pharasma (center), and Sarenrae battling Rovagug (left).Whoever dies, Arazni’s filling in their slot - and maybe getting to be less corpse-y. Pharasma giving her the Boneyard job? Urgathoa kicking the bucket as a middle finger to necromancers everywhere? Gozreh gifting a big burst of vitality as they beef it? I truly have no idea.
Okay I should have read this first. Scratch that. Also holy wow this is a reveal! I mean I adore Arazni - I'm running a party through Tyrant's Grasp at the moment and I can't wait for them to get into her situation. But... wow. Core 20. I'm happy for her. I hope I'm happy for her...
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Okay I should have read this first. Scratch that. Also holy wow this is a reveal! I mean I adore Arazni - I'm running a party through Tyrant's Grasp at the moment and I can't wait for them to get into her situation. But... wow. Core 20. I'm happy for her. I hope I'm happy for her...A few interesting pieces of the puzzle from
today’s stream: Lost Omens: Divine Mysteries is a 2024 book with a psychopomp narrator, aimed at bringing Gods & Magic into the Remaster and expanding on it. The cover shows a suspiciously alive-looking Arazni (stated to be joining the Core 20!) standing in front of stained glass depictions of Asmodeus (right), Pharasma (center), and Sarenrae battling Rovagug (left).Whoever dies, Arazni’s filling in their slot - and maybe getting to be less corpse-y. Pharasma giving her the Boneyard job? Urgathoa kicking the bucket as a middle finger to necromancers everywhere? Gozreh gifting a big burst of vitality as they beef it? I truly have no idea.
yeah... running TG as well, and I killed her off permanently.
I would like for the next PF campaign we run to take place in the same continuity, so might just have to tell my players that there's some differences w/ the new source material.
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Addendum: It's awfully suspicious that Razmir's making moves right now with all this coming up. Replacement for the roll of God of Magic? He's also is famous for his mask, and being generally a sneaky, greedy, deceitful lil... uh, so-and-so. New Norgorber replacement? Or maybe he'll just fall in the pit. Please fall in the pit.
Razmir will not be replacing mere godlings like Nethys or Norborger since Great Razmir is already the most powerful and most beloved of all deities.
yeah... running TG as well, and I killed her off permanently.
I would like for the next PF campaign we run to take place in the same continuity, so might just have to tell my players that there's some differences w/ the new source material.
;-; But Arazni my beloved....
I feel you though. We've played so many of the APs now and usually we don't have continuity problems, but like they happen. For example, Return of the Runelords
Also a friend ran a really good but reeeeeaally canon-breaky homebrew campaign early on in Absalom where we brought back Aroden, and we've come across so many things we've had to rework as a result that we instead retconned it a bit and made them a "new" Aroden made of Aroden-essence called Casroden. He's just buddies with Iomedae right now because he's new and a baby. Now we've gotta work out how Arazni feels about that >.>
My bet is also on Asmodeus. Not because of licensing issues necessarily - I think I heard somewhere that whatever god it will be, it won't be because of that, but I can't attest to the validity of that statement and can't remember exactly where I got it from. But for one, I think Cheliax has kind of had its time in the sun - Council of Thieves, Hell's Rebels/Hell's Vengeance, etc. - and without spoilers, things aren't really going well for the forces of diabolic evil recently. Also, with the removal of slavery from Cheliax in 2e, and since some of the core elements of Asmodean worship involve slavery, giving him the boot wouldn't be out of the question.
Well there is now 'Mandatory conscription' which can be a poTAto/poTATo situation. Bad idea to have s lot of mad halflings in your army. plus they are going to get ground up by Tarbaphon's armies.
I would like for the next PF campaign we run to take place in the same continuity, so might just have to tell my players that there's some differences w/ the new source material.
Considering how easy it is to resurrect mortals within the rules, and how there are no actual rules about divine mortality or lack thereof, it feels like "a God came back from what seemed like their death" is one of the easiest canon breaches to resolve. Like Aroden was prophecied to do this, and it was a surprise when he didn't. Arazni was his traveling companion for a while, so maybe she hitched the ride back that was waiting for Aroden. Heck, Arazni already died twice before Tyrant's Grasp and neither of those times took.
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I would like for the next PF campaign we run to take place in the same continuity, so might just have to tell my players that there's some differences w/ the new source material.Considering how easy it is to resurrect mortals within the rules, and how there are no actual rules about divine mortality or lack thereof, it feels like "a God came back from what seemed like their death" is one of the easiest canon breaches to resolve. Like Aroden was prophecied to do this, and it was a surprise when he didn't. Arazni was his traveling companion for a while, so maybe she hitched the ride back that was waiting for Aroden. Heck, Arazni already died twice before Tyrant's Grasp and neither of those times took.
BUT... I don't want to do that ;-)
nah, at my table, she DED. or as a helpful nosoi explained to the party, *POOF!*
nah, at my table, she DED. or as a helpful nosoi explained to the party, *POOF!*
Was that nosoi Umble? "She has "Poof!"ed with decidedly pooficious permanentatiousness!"
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nah, at my table, she DED. or as a helpful nosoi explained to the party, *POOF!*
Remember, a central premise of the "Age of Lost Omens" is that Pharasma's people are considerably less omniscient than they used to be.
After listening to the amazing Paizo keynote for GenCon2023, it has been confirmed that we are going to see the death of one of our core deities in real time. So, of course, I cannot help but speculate!
The existence of core deities in Starfinder gives them what I would consider to be plot armor, but given the announcement of Starfinder 2e coming in 2025, it is entirely possible that Paizo could pull a retcon.
The current core 20 that are shared in both games are:
-Sarenrae
-Iomedae
-Desna
-Abadar
-Pharasma
-Zon-Kuthon
-Cayden Cailean
-Calistria
-Asmodeus
-Lamashtu
I will point out that some of them aren't "Core" in Starfinder, so some might drop out of Core Dieties due to becoming less relevant rather than getting killed.
As for Asmodeus and the whole OGL/D&D thing, might be useful to remember this would hold true for a lot of Hell's power players (and some from the Abyss).
I said this in another thread a while ago, but if Paizo want to keep how Drow mechanically work, while dropping as much WotC-licensed material as possible, I think the Jinin offer a possible way to do that. In 1e canon, the Jinin stayed on Golarion by fleeing underground like the Drow, but avoided being twisted by Rovagug and instead popped out on the other side of the planet in Tian Xia. That history offers a lot of opportunity to justify an elven ethnic group with subterranean adaptations, culturally and visibly distinct, but with plenty of new history and culture to set them apart. IIRC, the lands of the Jinin lie in the shadow of mountains which might allow them to retain their darkvision aboveground. And Paizo's Drow differed from WotC's by being blue, rather than black or purple, but in this case I like the idea of Jinin as [I]painting[.I] themselves blue, like Celtic warriors, rather than being born blue. And all of that would be a lot more interesting than the brief 1e outline of "elf weebs so impressed by Fantasy Japan they became samurai."
I said this in another thread a while ago, but if Paizo want to keep how Drow mechanically work, while dropping as much WotC-licensed material as possible, I think the Jinin offer a possible way to do that. In 1e canon, the Jinin stayed on Golarion by fleeing underground like the Drow, but avoided being twisted by Rovagug and instead popped out on the other side of the planet in Tian Xia. That history offers a lot of opportunity to justify an elven ethnic group with subterranean adaptations, culturally and visibly distinct, but with plenty of new history and culture to set them apart. IIRC, the lands of the Jinin lie in the shadow of mountains which might allow them to retain their darkvision aboveground. And Paizo's Drow differed from WotC's by being blue, rather than black or purple, but in this case I like the idea of Jinin as painting themselves blue, like Celtic warriors, rather than being born blue. And all of that would be a lot more interesting than the brief 1e outline of "elf weebs so impressed by Fantasy Japan they became samurai."
I'm likewise deeply curious to see what these imminent Tian Xia books present Jinin as, because they should have that Darklands voyage as a key part of their society, and the 1e iteration was just so painfully messy.
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Drows never existing in the setting indeed opens up a whole lot of possibilities for the Jinin.
My own pet explanation for the elf samurai culture was that Jinin latched on the samurai ethic to stay as far away from the Drow corruption as they could.
With Drow never having been a thing, this holds no water anymore.
The Drow being absent doesn't change that much from the Jinin's perspective:
-A bunch of elves fled into the Darklands to survive Earthfall.
- Over time, these elves lost touch with each other since the darklands are large and magic was unreliable.
- The precursors of the Jinin noticed the corrupting influence of Rovagug, and decided to organize their society around self-discipline to avoid those effects and also to get out of here when it's safe.
The Ayindilar might be their distant cousins. Unspecified other groups of Darklands elves might also be their distant cousins.
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The Drow being absent doesn't change that much from the Jinin's perspective:
-A bunch of elves fled into the Darklands to survive Earthfall.
- Over time, these elves lost touch with each other since the darklands are large and magic was unreliable.
- The precursors of the Jinin noticed the corrupting influence of Rovagug, and decided to organize their society around self-discipline to avoid those effects and also to get out of here when it's safe.
The Ayindilar might be their distant cousins. Unspecified other groups of Darklands elves might also be their distant cousins.
Cavern Elf is right there in Player Core.
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The Drow being absent doesn't change that much from the Jinin's perspective:
-A bunch of elves fled into the Darklands to survive Earthfall.
- Over time, these elves lost touch with each other since the darklands are large and magic was unreliable.
- The precursors of the Jinin noticed the corrupting influence of Rovagug, and decided to organize their society around self-discipline to avoid those effects and also to get out of here when it's safe.
The Ayindilar might be their distant cousins. Unspecified other groups of Darklands elves might also be their distant cousins.
Which corrupting influence of Rovagug ?
Which corrupting influence of Rovagug ?
They've broadly intimated that since Golarion is Rovagug's prison, as you get further and further underground his rumblings become more and more noticeable. Darklands folks need to learn to deal with it somehow.
snip
I actually meant to post this in the Tian Xia thread, so apologies for being off-topic.
I worry that Urgathoa beefing it leaves Team Bad Guy a little empty in the Core 20. Asmodeus, Lamashtu, Norgorber, Zon-Kuthon, and an imprisoned Rovagug is kind of a thin rogue's gallery.
Losing a more 'heroic' deity feels more interesting.
I wonder if Rovagug would drop out of the 20 core gods. Not that he isn't a big deal in the setting he is, but he isn't really one that players should be worshiping and one that basically is outlawed for good reason everywhere. I could make a follower of Nogober, Urgathoa, Zon-Kuthon, Asmodeus, or even Lamashtu that could be played and part of a group. Might be tricky and difficult to work, but it is possible. Rovagug on the other hand I don't think can really be done.
and to me the core 20 should be deities that the players look at having as patrons.
if you are playing in an evil campaign, Rovagug sure sounds pretty awesome as a choice of deity.
He's also literally 'central' to the Golarion setting, being that Rovagug is trapped in the core of the planet.
I've always seen Rovagug being trapped in Golarion as the reason why it is so central in the cosmos. Why we have so many deities. Why the CARE about this planet and interact with it. Rovagug has the power to destroy the material plane and who knows what else. Anchoring him on Golarion elevates it to supreme importance, but that's the only reason it matters, galactically.
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I've always seen Rovagug being trapped in Golarion as the reason why it is so central in the cosmos. Why we have so many deities. Why the CARE about this planet and interact with it. Rovagug has the power to destroy the material plane and who knows what else. Anchoring him on Golarion elevates it to supreme importance, but that's the only reason it matters, galactically.I worry that Urgathoa beefing it leaves Team Bad Guy a little empty in the Core 20. Asmodeus, Lamashtu, Norgorber, Zon-Kuthon, and an imprisoned Rovagug is kind of a thin rogue's gallery.
Losing a more 'heroic' deity feels more interesting.
I wonder if Rovagug would drop out of the 20 core gods. Not that he isn't a big deal in the setting he is, but he isn't really one that players should be worshiping and one that basically is outlawed for good reason everywhere. I could make a follower of Nogober, Urgathoa, Zon-Kuthon, Asmodeus, or even Lamashtu that could be played and part of a group. Might be tricky and difficult to work, but it is possible. Rovagug on the other hand I don't think can really be done.
and to me the core 20 should be deities that the players look at having as patrons.
if you are playing in an evil campaign, Rovagug sure sounds pretty awesome as a choice of deity.
He's also literally 'central' to the Golarion setting, being that Rovagug is trapped in the core of the planet.
IIRC there is a mystery about why Rovagug was apparently very interested in Earth, Androffa and Golarion when the other deities decided to imprison it in the latter.
So, maybe not the only reason.
I would guess Rovagug's interest in Earth is probably related to Earth's ties to the Outer Gods, since those things exist outside of and predate the universe so presumably Rovagug cannot get to them easily in order to eat them which annoys Rovagug.
I've always seen Rovagug being trapped in Golarion as the reason why it is so central in the cosmos. Why we have so many deities. Why the CARE about this planet and interact with it. Rovagug has the power to destroy the material plane and who knows what else. Anchoring him on Golarion elevates it to supreme importance, but that's the only reason it matters, galactically.
At least in my campaign, the story of Rovagug is also a theodicy for why the gods don't intervene in world affairs. The last gods who really intervened on Golarion were Sarenrae and Aroden, and Sarenrae accidently created the Pit of Gormuz while Aroden up and died. Divine intervention, then, has severe consequences that both the heavens and hells are concerned about - even Asmodeus doesn't want Rovagug unleashed, since that would mean he has nothing left to rule. But both still vie for influence among its people, as they do on every world but Earth - they just can't do it directly, or else they'll end up with an escalating arms race that will almost inevitably lead to Golarion's destruction and the unleashing of the Rough Beast. The "Pax Deorum" is thus a reluctant stalemate between the two.
Is that how the canon setting resolves the Problem of Evil? Probably not. But it's a good excuse.
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Tangent, but thinking on how Golarion has been hidden away in the Starfinder setting makes me think there is potential for a post-apocalyptic setting. Rovagug got very close to getting out and trashed a lot of real estate, so the planet got moved into The Gap and so on. SO there still could be adventures on Golarion with the PCs being wandering custodians who make sure the new seals stay working and eliminate threats due to lots of Rovagug spawn running lose.
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Tangent, but thinking on how Golarion has been hidden away in the Starfinder setting makes me think there is potential for a post-apocalyptic setting. Rovagug got very close to getting out and trashed a lot of real estate, so the planet got moved into The Gap and so on. SO there still could be adventures on Golarion with the PCs being wandering custodians who make sure the new seals stay working and eliminate threats due to lots of Rovagug spawn running lose.
This reminds me of Hell on Earth TTRPG. Mixed with Shadowrun for the punk-fantasy feel but with the robust PF2/SF2 engine.
I would like such a setting.| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Tweet from the Paizo account saying to check the blog on wednesday to learn about the imminent change to the core pantheon...
I'm placing a not-at-all-confident bet on Gorum biting it, honestly based on nothing but gut feel.
My number one guess will stick with Torag.
Nethys...
I'd go for Sheylin. She pretty much only show up in relation to other deity when people talk about her, either as a member of the prismatic ray, or as ZK's sister, people rarely ever talk about how interesting she is on her own. And since peoples seems uninterested by her as her own godess, it mean that having her killed would have great impact to all the other deities that relate to her, without killing a godess that people are overly attached to.
Also, she have been noted to be the one good godess that even evil deity rather like, so her death starting off a massive war were everyone is involved would make sense, while the death of a god like nethys would leave most indifferent.
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How strange, I have the opposite perception, Shelyn has had more followers than any other deity in games I’ve played and Ran. She’s incredibly popular on her own.
So I guess just different circles have different deities they favor.
Probably yeah. In my experience, player who want to play an artsy and colorfull character are more likely to follow Desna as a deity, and those wanting a parangon of good almost always pick Sarenrae. And when I see people talking about lore on the internet, I seldom see mentions of Sheylin unless they are talking about the prismatic ray or her relationship with ZK, while I see mention of "accomplishment" of other gods quite a bit more.
Except for ascended gods (or Gozreh). I almost never see any mention of their accomplishment either. Probably the reason why I feel like those dying wouldn't have the same impact as the like of Sheylin, Asmodeus or Abadar. Cayden is a fun god, but Golarion wouldn't stop spinning if he was gone, and most of the pantheon wouldn't care much. I guess Gozreh dying would be interesting if it throw golarion's nature into havock, and since almost every druid/nature focussed character I saw played were either atheistic or followers of the green faith, it wouldn't sadden the players too much I think.
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Shelyn is actually my #1 favorite core deity, whilst Desna has always been "that one which people seem to like but I don't get why". And like, whilst the prismatic ray or Zonny might play a part, it's mostly because of her own character which really speaks to me. She superficially seems like an Aphrodite expy, both in design and the whole just "goddess of love & beauty", but then when you actually look at her details she's so much more.
She is a goddess of love, yes, but not just romantic / sexual. She's a goddess of all kinds of love, including things like familial love. Likewise, whilst yes she's a goddess of beauty, it's not just physical beauty, but also inner beauty with her teaching everyone to be the best them they can be and to make the world a better (and by extension more beautiful) place. She really is wonderful and honestly reading about her worldview has legitimately I feel been a positive impact on my own irl mental health.
Oh, and unrelated to that, I actually feel both her and Zonny pretty safe as whilst they say that Starfinder canon won't play a part on Pathfinder canon, the idea of Zon-Shelyn which they'll be doing after the War of Immortals event only is actually interesting if you have both Zonny and Shelyn in Pathfinder for you to compare the merged form to (otherwise it's just "A deity of tortured artists with a kinda neat backstory").
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OK, I was working on a list of how each deity might die but with an announcement tomorrow I better just put this up now. Can't think of how Abadar, Irori, Nethys, or Pharasma, might go, but oh well. Remember, this is 100% serious!
Asmodeus: Neglects to read the EULA on his new iPhone and just hits I Agree, thus leaving the entirety of Hell in the hands of Apple.
Calistria: Turns out that you can develop an allergy to wasps after multiple stings.
Cayden Cailean: Wanting to relive his adventuring days, he decides to try and solo a fun little dungeon he heard of called the Tomb of Horrors. Unfortunately, resurrecting a deity requires a diamond about the size of a planet.
Desna: Takes a left turn at Alberquerque and gets well and truly lost.
Erastil: Ignoring the warnings of his wife Jaidi that he'll shoot his eye out with it, Erastil has a few pops with his new Red Rider longbow in the backyard before a ricochet makes his "Old Deadeye" epithet much too literal.
Gorum: While strolling through another ravaged battlefield, Our Lord in Iron steps on a rusty nail, develops tetanus, and dies in bed.
Gozreh: Who? Never heard of him. Maybe you were thinking of Gorum, the god of warfare and iron? Nature? No, that's the Green Faith you're thinking of. Please don't invent fake gods just to rile people up.
Iomedae: Runs out of worshippers after dealing 20d6 sonic damage to anyone who fails a Religion check.
Lamashtu: The abyssal bureaucracy finally approves her retroactive maternity leave and she decides to take a few eons off to care for her 1,043,392,422 offspring.
Norgorber: Civil war. Father Skinsaw gets direly sick after drinking his post-slaughter cup of coffee and accuses Blackfingers of poisoning it. Blackfingers says that if he had administered the poison personally it wouldn't have left Father Skinsaw alive so the Grey Master must have stolen the poison and used it on him. The Grey Master says that sure he stole some poison on behalf of an anonymous buyer but that must have been the Reaper of Reputation for who else could hide their identity from a god. The Reaper of Reputation says that's poppycock, the Grey Master just didn't vet his client well enough, and anyway maybe if Father Skinsaw took his coffee black instead of with all those frou-frou spices and syrups then he'd have noticed the poison in it anyway. Father Skinsaw says you take that back you pretentious twerp, and it all devolves into a melee. When the dust settles, Norgorber is lying on the ground with multiple self-inflicted stab wounds while Thamir quietly tosses an empty vial into the bin before hopping onto the now-empty throne.
Rovagug: His cultists finally manage to open a crack in his prison only to find out that the other gods had forgotten to poke any air holes into it.
Sarenrae: After hearing about the dying-sun prophecy, she decides to hit the gym to make sure she can fight off whatever might try to kill her. This pushes her muscle mass WAY past the Chandrasekhar limit, causing her to go supernova.
Shelyn: Turns out she was dead all along. Zun Kuthon killed her when she tried to take the Whisperer of Souls, but the guilt made him re-imagine her as alive so vividly that he's been acting as both gods for several thousand years.
Torag: Passed peacefully in his sleep in his 232,398,492nd year. At his side were his wife Folgrit (nee Jones), his brothers Magrim and Angradd, and his children Kols, Bolka, Trudd, and Grundinnar (his ex-wife Dranngvit also snuck into the hospital room, but she was shown out). He will be remembered as a gruff but generous grandfather, skilled smith, ale aficionado, and absolutely not a war criminal in any way whatsoever. The family would like to thank all of the nurses, doctors, clerics, and alchemists at the Qi Zhong Hospital and Hospice for their tireless care in his final months. In lieu of flowers, please send donations to the Highhelm Heart and Stroke Foundation.
Urgoath/Orthagoa/Ur-geatho: With James Jacobs switching roles, there's nobody left on the lore team who can spell her name.
Zon Kuthon: Forgot the safe word.
LOL, fun stuff Jerdane.
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Shelyn: Turns out she was dead all along. Zun Kuthon killed her when she tried to take the Whisperer of Souls, but the guilt made him re-imagine her as alive so vividly that he's been acting as both gods for several thousand years.
All very funny but this one is a pretty cool idea on its own terms. Dunno if I really want it to be true or anything, but still cool.
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OK, I was working on a list of how each deity might die but with an announcement tomorrow I better just put this up now. Can't think of how Abadar, Irori, Nethys, or Pharasma, might go, but oh well. Remember, this is 100% serious!
Asmodeus: Neglects to read the EULA on his new iPhone and just hits I Agree, thus leaving the entirety of Hell in the hands of Apple.
Calistria: Turns out that you can develop an allergy to wasps after multiple stings.
Cayden Cailean: Wanting to relive his adventuring days, he decides to try and solo a fun little dungeon he heard of called the Tomb of Horrors. Unfortunately, resurrecting a deity requires a diamond about the size of a planet.
Desna: Takes a left turn at Alberquerque and gets well and truly lost.
Erastil: Ignoring the warnings of his wife Jaidi that he'll shoot his eye out with it, Erastil has a few pops with his new Red Rider longbow in the backyard before a ricochet makes his "Old Deadeye" epithet much too literal.
Gorum: While strolling through another ravaged battlefield, Our Lord in Iron steps on a rusty nail, develops tetanus, and dies in bed.
Gozreh: Who? Never heard of him. Maybe you were thinking of Gorum, the god of warfare and iron? Nature? No, that's the Green Faith you're thinking of. Please don't invent fake gods just to rile people up.
Iomedae: Runs out of worshippers after dealing 20d6 sonic damage to anyone who fails a Religion check.
Lamashtu: The abyssal bureaucracy finally approves her retroactive maternity leave and she decides to take a few eons off to care for her 1,043,392,422 offspring.
Norgorber: Civil war. Father Skinsaw gets direly sick after drinking his post-slaughter cup of coffee and accuses Blackfingers of poisoning it. Blackfingers says that if he had administered the poison personally it wouldn't have left Father Skinsaw alive so the Grey Master must have stolen the poison and used it on him. The Grey Master says that sure he stole some...
I absolutely loved Shelyn here and I also enjoyed Sarenrae and Zon-Kuthon a lot.
Well done.