Last one to post wins


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No one steals from a rat and gets away with it.


Squeak.


People steal from rats all the time and get away with it. They're so tiny, and we have cats.


Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

Rats, cats, bah! The real money's on honey badgers.


Uncle Teddy wrote:
Rats, cats, bah! The real money's on honey badgers.

But he don't even care.


How about puting a rat, a cat and a honey badger down your pants and letting them fight it out?


Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

Sounds like something GoatToucher might try.

Sovereign Court

*Gasp!*

Don't even JOKE about that! You just know he'll do exactly that!


Squeak! *runs back to Grandpa, and hides in a jacket pocket*


*Sips his coffee, sitting in a comfy chair*


Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

Avatar, I think you're right. And that's just too cruel to the rat, cat, and honey badger.

Sovereign Court

Absolutely! I'm fine with pain and suffering, but even then, there are certain limits that you do NOT cross!


Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

I do apologize for that dark thought even crossing my mind. Seems my assistance in aiding the hunt against the vile creatures known as spammers has really gotten to me.

* grabs a bottle of Jack and sits down in a La-Z-Boy *

I need a vacation.


:walks in, a great tumult going on in his trousers:

For -science-!


I think not you vile whatever-you-are.

* using primordial magicks lost to even the eldest of gods I open a portal to a realm of absolute nothing and send GoatToucher through the portal while, at the same time, freeing the trapped beings within his trousers and sending them safely to their respective homes *

This ole man's picked up a trick or two in his life.

* pets John the Rat, who is tucked safely in one of my coat pockets *

Now, would anyone like some fresh-baked cookies?


I WANNA COOKIE!!!!


That was GT's life model decoy. All you've done now is to make him randier... Wait, there's cookies?


Yes you need to delete them in order for you computer to function properly

Sovereign Court

I would like a cookie or two, what flavour are they, by chance?


Ansjovis or spinache, take your pick.


:enters wearing a "I Was Cast Into the Void Beyond Space and Time Where Horrors Outside Mortal Reasoning Lie and All I Got Was This Lousy T-shirt!" t-shirt:

I introduced my rump ointment to Those that Dwell Beyond Sleeping. They found it soothing.


I have all sorts of flavors - chocolate chip, peanut butter, cinnamon, and many, many more - including flavors that are beyond mortal description. And no cookies for Molten Dragon or GoatToucher until they get rid of MBT permanently. Well, one cookie each - I'm not that mean - and then you get rid of Message Board Troll.


I'm afraid unless you find a epic level mod with the mythic banhammer there is no way to permanently get rid of Message Board Trolls.


AND EVEN THEN OTHERS RISE UP TO TAKE THE PLACE OF THE FALLEN!!! WE ARE LEGION!!! Now about that cookie.


Is it my imagination, or did the troll talk in an indoor voice at the end. I guess those beating he was getting worked. Keep it up.

Scarab Sages

Here, Message board troll, eat these. *hands over a box of candies labeled "Whizzo Quality Assortment"*


YUMMY!!! *eats candies box and all*


* grabs some cookies and a glass of milk, sits back in comfy chair, and watches all the fun *

Do you think we should tell him what's in those candies?
.
.
.
.
.
Nah.


Shh gramps, the effect will show in a minute.

*Sits back in comfy chair with a soda and chips, anticipating the splendor that is the unexpected effect*


URRRP!!! MY TUMMY FEELS FUNNY!!!

Sovereign Court

Batten down the hatches, maties, there's gonna be a 'storm' a coming!

*Yes, I got conscripted into Besmara's crew...again!*


Ooh, this should be fun!

* waves cane and casts protective wards upon everyone but MBT then offers TFF some cookies *

Try the snickerdoodles. I got the recipe from Asmodeus.


Well, *munch*, these are good as hell. I knew that of course already.
The hot flavor, the afterburn when you swallow the bite.

Now, can i offer you a glass of hot chilli whiskey? Be assured, the chilli is only a mild undertone.


That sounds delightful.

* takes the glass and quickly downs the contents *

That warmed up the ole bones. Where did you get it? I'd love to have a few bottles - strictly for special occasions, of course.


We have a special brand of chilli we grow down below.

I'm sure we can come to an arrangement.

Scarab Sages

I'll bet you can me something, Fiend Fantastic: Precisely which Archdevil was it who invented EULAs?

Oh, and what's this?
*reaches behind ear, pulls out Win*


Well, not me, sadly.

You'll have to thank mankind for 'inventing'. Us devils merely were brainstorming one night, on how to mess with mankind in new ways and decided to throw different ideas into a bowl and made a mixture of it. In the end, we sent it into a random human head....the rest is corporate history.

Sovereign Court

Yargh! That be a good tale worthy to tell across the seas! Oh no! I'm talkin' like a pirate now, I is!


You are under arest.
All pirating must be stopped.


Captain Spalding, dear, Avatar is merely talking like a pirate. If he really were a pirate he'd try to steal the Win from me and he would never do that.


But I Would!

Scarab Sages

Would, but didn't.

I did it 35 minutes ago.


:scene fades to 34 minutes ago:

:takes Win:

:scene flashes forward:

Nice.


*yoink*

Sovereign Court

Avast, ye goblin!Be relinquishing of yon booty, if ye don't wanna walk the plank and sink into the briney depths below!


winning


That's funny, so am I.


Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Companion, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Starfinder Superscriber

You were. I believe the win is currently in my possession.

Sovereign Court

Shiver me timbers! Land lubbers off the port bow!


Land lubbers? Where?

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