goblin fodder's page

39 posts. Alias of baldwin the merciful.


"Can we eat 'um?" Another goblin inquires.

The goblin kicks the dirt after the lecture. "'kay, me no go chops dead h'ads off." He kicks the dirt again clearly disappointed.

Me...me go git h'ads....Gobluns eas h'ad to git...orcy not so much.' On of the goblins offers helpfully and he makes a beheading motion with his rusty dogslicer.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh." The goblins have heard an omen. A few come by and pat the drow on his back. One even offers him some of his goblin ale in condolence. A second lays a pile of lint in front of Nym's plate and third gives him a frog's foot on a twine.

There a lot of Ohs and Ahs. "Stuupppid. Heheheh."

When Kalim speaks quite a few townies look towards Felicitas wanting to hear a good story.

"O...O...Oh is there a goblun sorcerer in it? I like 'em" One of the golbin's add.

"How 'bout fire...gotta 'ave fire....fire fun." another chirps.

"What 'bout longshank demon horses...." There is a choir of hisses at the mention of horses.

"Guud eats too...delicious fuud like eagle eggs."

And the list and comments go on and on.

The feast begins. You find that the goblins are quite resourceful in hteir food preparation skills. Once you get past the sight of the goblins playing with fire and occasionally, scorching themselves they actually prepare a great roasted pig.

The festivities continue and for a few hours everyone finds a few moments of peace.

RD 1: Goblin Fodder

Kalim unleashes an attack on the mind flayer which is reflected back upon the sorcerer. This triggers a reaction from the goblins who rush towards the bard, cleric, and prone sorcerer. Desmond the red dot on your token represents that you are climbing up.

The goblins rush forward.

Flanking the prone sorcerer:
impr unarmed att, flank: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 4 + 2 = 24;damage: 1d2 ⇒ 1;precise strike if flanking: 1d6 ⇒ 6


impr unarmed att, flank: 1d20 + 4 + 2 ⇒ (18) + 4 + 2 = 24;damage: 1d2 ⇒ 2;precise strike if flanking: 1d6 ⇒ 1

Two attacks hit for 10 Hps of damage.

Attacking the tumor (non flanking):

D: 7

impr unarmed att: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (10) + 4 = 14;damage: 1d2 ⇒ 2


impr unarmed att: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (17) + 4 = 21;damage: 1d2 ⇒ 2


impr unarmed att: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (13) + 4 = 17;damage: 1d2 ⇒ 1

I'm not sure if anything else hits. I will assume that you put up mage armor as yoru normal morning routine before leaving the shop.

Attacking Felic:


impr unarmed att: 1d20 + 4 ⇒ (15) + 4 = 19;damage: 1d2 ⇒ 2

The goblin attacking Felic misses

RD 1 updated Map

RD 3: Goblins

The bardic goblins continues to sing it's horrid battle hymn that has his troops inspired. The two goblins near Meat'd attack,

short sword, bless, bull, IC: 1d20 + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (15) + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 = 28;damage ,bull: 1d4 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (3) + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 10

short sword, bless, bull, IC: 1d20 + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (12) + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 = 25;damage ,bull: 1d4 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 11

The big friendly oaf springs more leaks as his lifeblood seeps out of him.

RD 2: Goblins

Meath'd aOO, mag oil: 1d20 + 11 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 11 + 1 = 13;dam: 2d6 + 7 + 1 ⇒ (5, 3) + 7 + 1 = 16

dex: 1d20 - 1 ⇒ (5) - 1 = 4
He massive club slips out of his hands.

Three more goblins scurry up in front to the goblin bard, Two attack meath'd

short sword, bless, bull, IC: 1d20 + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (16) + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 = 29;damage ,bull: 1d4 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 11

short sword, bless, bull, IC: 1d20 + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (16) + 9 + 1 + 2 + 1 = 29;damage ,bull: 1d4 + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 ⇒ (4) + 2 + 2 + 2 + 1 = 11

The ogree gets stuck twice for 22 HP

RD 2: Goblins

A feeling of dread washes over the area as moves little goblin feet round the bend. the surviving goblin is singing a dark goblin Chant inspiring his fellows on.

I have to take the goblins actions later, I have there statistics at home.

Goblin reflex saves:

g1: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (17) + 3 = 20
made: No damage

g2: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (2) + 3 = 5

g3: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (2) + 3 = 5
g4: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (10) + 3 = 13


g5: 1d20 + 3 ⇒ (3) + 3 = 6

Meath'd RD 1 action is he stays put getting ready for the attack.

"Kill 'em...burn d'witch...burn the witch! Kill 'er guud, stick 'er, prick 'er, make 'er deader." Beady evil eyes galre at Felicitas.

A archer orders, "Fire on those not heeding The Almighty's command."

"Gimme filthy nightcrawler scum....yous fat one bring to me." He points to Karnog.

I put the initiative order up for when we need it.

One of the goblin ground commanders approaches, "So you bring back two filthy night crawlers....guud guud, his holiness b'happi with them in pits."

"Theys sealed the doors with magic." He points you towards one of the tunnels that slopes downward.

Map to Drow

You come to a door.

What are you going to do? I assume Desmond is front and center.

"Yes...yes bad magic blinded an acolyte, walls of fire and balls fo fire, but we kiltz one and theys only gots fouries left. Foul worshipers of spiders" He groans.

You all can gather they have some form of rogue by his description along with a cleric and wizard or sorcerer.

"Theyz be sneaky and bring cursed magic into these sacred halls." He lifts both hands upward. To emphasize his dislike he spits on the ground.

"Yesssss, yesss you be smart! Another intruder dark elvies sneaky up and got themselves caughtsies in a cave. Locks themselvies in with magic, yous go and kilz them alls but one, that ones yous bring backs for Lord Tribitz. Yous do that then Tribitz see you."

Around the 7th hour of waiting small retinue of hobgoblins approach carrying chest. The place it carefully on the ground. One goblin steps up and speaks, "Greatin' from the Almight Lord Tribitz, he send gold for job done better than others did." With that the chest is opened and sure enough it is piled to the top with gold. "Lord Tribitz much generous, he give you 12,000 shiny golds. One thousand for each head of fearsome hydra." He pauses and lets one of you inspect the chest to ensure it is in fact gold.

appraise checks if you have it.

"Almighty Lord Tribitz has special requesty befores yous git to meets him, yous need to be worthy of second special task."

Anyone is free to interact and chat with the goblin a this point.No need to have it all one one player.

After some effort everyone eventually makes it across the other side. This cave is guarded by a 1 goblin cleric and 8 goblin fighters. The western edge of the chamber is open and faces out to the lake. Two
rowboats are tied to a stone dock that juts off this side of the cave. A 10 ft. high natural rock platform stands in the southwestern portion of the cave. Two rope ladders are hung on the north and east faces of the platform, allowing for easy access to its top.

You are directed to wait. "Leaders come give direction."

The goblins take notice at the Rawrrrr, but they nod in unison when Kalim does his spear twirl. "You wait, we sent for priest; Priest decide if you fight hydra."

A 1...seriously?

The goblin guard studies you and frowns, "What makes you think we need your help?"

Assuming Felicitas isn't going to play a cruel joke on she'll get your disguises ready again before you set off.

You are eventually led back into the goblins city and through some areas that look vaguely familiar especially the fighting cavern. Xil leads you up to guard post where 3 heavily armed goblins stand at attention. they are not fidgeting or playing with themselves, they take their job seriously and appear proficient with there gear.

[b}No non-goblinoids beyond this point."[/b] The commander then proceeds to aske a series of questions. “Who are you?"

"Where are you from?"
" Why are you coming here?” and,
“How long will you stay?”

Updated Map

Grungsdi wrote:

holy hell. that ws a good trade! I was kind of expecting them to be worth like 10 silver or something.

my roll was good enough to know they weren't glass, but not to know for sure, I figure we get someone to explain to me their value.

"Hehehe stuupid dwarfy traded guud burn stuff for pretty pebbles that's everywhere."

Sparque Darktongue wrote:

Just waiting fore Burn to post to work out my awesome-awesome tactics….

If you want you can roll your awesome-awesome tactics and chief big-wig will try to fit in cinematically as practical when the time comes.


Initiative Order:

Zunk - moved forward hit for 9 HP
Stomp -tired to bite and stomp on Zunk but sadly missed.

Zunk stabbity it guud, but too guud. no crit confirmation.

Most of the tribe comes around as you pack you gear to praise you and slap you on your back, but mostly to inventory your sleeping locations. Who could blame them you are going on a death mission and well, some you had better sleeping spots and stuff then they did. "If yuu no come back, dibs."

Eventually, ready or not, you are pushed off for your big adventure.

The yummy cockroach potion seems to have settled your tummy. Your sickness is gone.

"C t'ld yuus guud fer belly."

Everyone stomps - mostly out of fear - when the barbarian begins his chant. "he be bestest, bedd'r than best." One enthusiastic offers at the end of the song. He clearly doesn't want to be on the receiving end of goblins punch.

The tribe is amazed at Sparque's good luck, not only does he get to picky a pocket, he gets a mouse! Some less than attractive goblinettes slither up to the Sparque, since he clearly has the the Chief's favor.

Biter notices quite a few goblins now have sticks and clubs in their hands, some polished others freshly pulled out of the swampy muck. You know this the goblin version of hide and seek. The dare-taker rushes off into the marsh without any weapons and attempts to find a good hiding spot. The other goblins try to find him, and if they do, the finder is allowed to whack the previously hidden goblin with a club.

As Biter runs off into the swamp he is absolutely convinced he has a a perfect hiding spot behind a old knotty stump.

DM stealth:

staelth: 1d20 + 6 ⇒ (4) + 6 = 10
goblins: 1d10 ⇒ 9

1d20 - 1 ⇒ (8) - 1 = 7
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (19) - 1 = 18
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (1) - 1 = 0
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (6) - 1 = 5
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (12) - 1 = 11
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (18) - 1 = 17
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (7) - 1 = 6
1d20 - 1 ⇒ (8) - 1 = 7

Suddenly Biter starts to get a bit jumpy as nine of his fellow tribesman snoop around his super duper swell hiding spot. He tries to burrow int0 the mucky mud a little but he is discovered by three gobos who shout with glee as they begin to whack the cleric.

dam: 1d4 - 1 ⇒ (2) - 1 = 1
dam: 1d4 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2
dam: 1d4 - 1 ⇒ (3) - 1 = 2

Hide or Get Clubbed:
Once the goblins start looking, roll
1d10 to determine how many goblins come close enough to the hiding goblin to attempt –1 Perception checks to notice the hiding goblin. If a goblin finds the hidden goblin, the resulting club strike automatically inflicts 1d4–1 points of damage. If no goblins find the hidden goblin, he wins a loan of the mystical Ring That Lets You
Climb Real Good (a ring of climbing)

You guys are are ruthless for the slow poster. pushing the other golbins out of line.

everyone laughs and claps at the excitement of someone dashing to bounce into the the rusty earbiter.

"No bad mojo? Guud mojo? the tribe begins to agree with the Chief as they lick the dirt due to the powerful Chieftain's booming voice.

However there is a dissident in the group. "But no sign of guud luck." One of the tribesman mutters. However, suddenly a tremendous Teeter Chair shaking rumble awes the crowd, as the Chief blesses the Squeally's death with his holy belch-fart.

"Guud Mojoi, guud mojo...we believe."

The gobos chatter:
"Bit'r's tight'r, gonna have an all-night'r."

There much merriment as the would be-heroes step up for the challenge.

As Zunk indulges of the apple treat there's a chant from others, lots of stomping and boisterous calls:

♪♫ ♪
"Zunk be guud
Zunk be brave.
Zunk don't care
if he go to grave."
♪♫ ♪

Just as you crunch the core you find a wiggle worm as a hidden treat...protein and good luck!

A few bystanding goblins nod when Friegaar's corrects - who is ugly and who is fat - most likely because of fear.