Gobo Horde wrote:
While aging beef under controlled conditions does enhance flavor and texture, your average primate doesn't take well to the process, it just makes for a slimy, bitter meal and encourages parasites. No, if I'm eating peoplez, they need to be fresh, artfully prepared and properly cooked. Anything else would be uncivilized. Thank you, however, for the suggestion
and at risk of pushing my luck, I'd like to add this bit to my background matter
Ardra is, in her own mind, anyway, a perfectionist and an artist, and doesn't consider herself to be at all evil. Her one true desire in life is to reach the pinnacle of haut cuisine and share the experience with as many people as possible. She wants to connect and to belong, she's aware of her own talent and believes it to be the best if not only vehicle with which to achieve that. Her cannibalism stems directly from this, it has driven her down the foodie highway well past the last exit to gourmet avant-gardes.
She understands that society frowns upon the consumption of sentient creatures, but she believes that to be ignorant folly and an unreasonable deprivation of the senses, as the great side effect of intelligence is the huge range of emotion humanoids especially are capable of, emotions which, according to her research and experimentation, add a great deal of substance to the flavor of the flesh depending on what the meal was feeling when it was slaughtered.
She'd made tremendous inroads toward enlightening an entire culture before her talent got the better of her and caused the king to send his emissary and discovered her grand secret before she was ready to reveal it.
Her Preservationist archetype offers as much flavor, no pun intended, as it does mechanical diversity since it literally gives her access to fresh meat w/o the recently discovered difficulty of maintaining a a stockyard, although she'd still prefer to have the latter as emotionally preparing a meal before killing it is one of her greatest innovations. On the other hand, with the eventual addition of the planar preservationist feat certain meals which were previously unthinkable are within her reach, dishes like braised leg of glabrezu and angel heart scampi.
Her ultimate goal is to see a world where her accomplishments are honored and where food is not caged by petty, misinformed morality
excellent, thank you
this is a character I've spun out a few times and only been able to play once briefly. The concept may be a touch ambitious for a starting character, but I'm sure you'll tell me if I need to tone her down.
Meet Lady Ardra Pain de Veau, she's a Tiefling Alchemist: Preservationist who's been convicted of murder. Prior to her arrest, she was a kingdom famous chef and brewer at an acclaimed restaurant and tavern. She dedicated her life to the pursuit of the culinary arts, and though she was a horror to work for, her skill by itself was enough to draw would-be students and apprentices from across Talingarde and beyond. So meticulous was she that she sourced and raised her own livestock on a private farm. Ardra has even had the honor of preparing a meal directly for the members of the royal house Darius, who in turn bestowed upon her titles, if not lands, commensurate for the gratitude they felt to someone whose talent is surely a gift and blessing from Mitra herself, and no wonder, that night's tour de force menu included such specialties of hers as Warm Rocket and Soilent Green Salad, Long Pork Stew, Le Nourrisson Joues* with braised mushrooms and fennel and Honeyed Sweetbreads Pie.
Ardra's rise in fame and status seemed to have no limits until her private farm received a surprise visit from the king's clerk along with an entire regiment as an honor guard for the king wished to gift the land to her, a tax free estate. But when the clerk arrived, train in tow, he found the entire compound abandoned as though every hand had had simply vanished in the middle of their chores. Upon investigation, he found gardens and green houses full of every edible imaginable, but upon checking the stockyards, abattoirs, and smoke houses, the clerk began vomiting uncontrollably at one horror after the next. Hundreds of horse stalls housing not horses but humanoids, mostly humans, wild-eyed, naked and filthy, their teeth broken out and tongues removed (he would later find evidence that the tongues had been ground and used to make a sort of potted meat). Where the veal pens should have been, he found children and halflings bound to the floor, tubes attached to bladders forced down their throats so they could be force fed. He discovered sausage and bologna obviously made from the meat and organs of sentient species, and on and on...
Once he reported to the king that in all likelihood the Lady Ardra had fed him, his family, vassals and retainers and anyone who'd ever been to her establishment on the meat of sapient humanoids he was incensed and disgusted. He voided her titles, had all records of her visits to the palace destroyed, sent out proclamations announcing her crimes and immediately signed warrants for hers and all people associated with either the restaurant or farm's arrest.
open disclaimer:I am the guilty, guilty, guilty GM who left poor Keres among others high and dry two christmases ago. I won't bore you with details of my RL hardships, but, rather than being away from the boards a few days or weeks, it wound up being something like ten months, whereupon I promptly did not inform anyone I had finally returned... um, hi Keres... sorry, really.
So yes, I'm that guy and obviously I own the WotW AP. Between those two things, you may wish to disqualify me from applying, but if by any chance both these things may be forgiven, I've been playing PF for something like a decade, mostly tabletop but I have adequate experience with PBP. I prefer RP intense gaming, though combat and other game mechanic challenges are definitely good things.
Also, I have made use of 3pp materials and have no qualms there.
Anyway, I'll look for your 'yay/nay' before I take up any more space here, but I do hope you'll consider my personal and public shame punishment enough.
The Wyrm Ouroboros wrote:
By definition, however, paladins really tend not to be moody and angsty - or, interpreted, I wouldn't allow such a paladin to be a PC. (Nor is the minotaur race available at this time.)
you've ruined all my dreams... nevertheless, a convincing changeling paladin poses a reasonable challenge. I know you're anxious to get back into the swing so I won't ask you to wait for me, but if you can wait or, alternatively, can't find an adequate candidate in the meantime, I'll have one for you by Monday at the latest.
John Woodford wrote:
This should probably be in Rules Questions. Short answer is that you can have multiple archetypes as long as none of them have substitutions for the same class feature.
thank you, that's as I surmised, and perhaps some kind admin will transfer the thread to the appropriate forum.
if you insist: formerly a witch's familiar, Hashktiphugin, called simply Phu, is a shadow demon bound to the body of tortoise-shell marked kitten. After the death of his mistress, he refused to return to hell and now seeks redemption rather than suffer the horrors of that place. With his ability to take shadow form, natural curiosity, super senses and universal adorableness, he's a perfect spy.