Aura faint evocation (darkness); CL 3rd
Slot —; Price 600 gp; Weight —
Description
This shimmering black dust causes one creature to be coated in a layer of darkness for one minute. This grants the creature concealment (20% miss chance) in normal light or total concealment (50% miss chance) in dim or less light and grants bonuses to Stealth as if the creature was invisible. The darkness is thin enough that the creature can see out of it with no penalties.
There is no effect while the creature is in bright light, though a DC 20 Perception check allows an observer to notice that the user is in less light than the area around them. Creatures with darkvision see through the dustings of darkness as if it were normal darkness. Applying dustings of darkness to someone affected by a glitterdust spell, removes the glittering effect, but not blindness if still present. Casting glitterdust on a creature under the affect of dustings of darkness neutralizes the dustings of darkness.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, darkness; Cost 300 gp
So, it's like an anti-glitterdust effect. Interesting. A little more powerful than blur, but I'm still not 100% comfortable with all the illumination interplay here. That said, the designer is finding a niche that no one's touched in this way before. They were smart to widen the darkness-inducing effect to include more than that. And the countering of glitterdust is innovative in some ways. It's also a cheap consummable item. Well presented.
Weak Keep?
I liked this item especially for low-magic, or low-level campaigns. The designer did a great job of thinking through various interactions with other game design components. The interaction between the item and Glitterdust is a well-done touch.
I recommend that you vote for this designer.
Keep.
Simple, smart, useful.
Keep!
Welcome to the Top 32!
You created a lean, attractive, low cost consumable. That's not always the easiest thing to do, so, well done. I've witnessed more than one darkness argument and you've done an excellent job of catering for potential questions at the table. You managed to do all of this and include an anti-glitterdust effect. Impressive.
What I like:
Useful consumable items can be tough, and I think you did a bang-up job here of creating one that gives adequate bang for its (quite inexpensive) buck. Cheap enough that a low-level group might not object to having a packet or two on hand, while still remaining useful for higher levels as well.
What I love:
You could've just made darkness in a can; instead you really thought this one through and considered the variety of lighting conditions this could be used in and included them all in the items effect. Quite nice. And the glitterdust zapping is a really stellar idea.
What needs a little sumptin' sumptin'...
I don't really have a lot of flaws to find here; it's simple and innovative. Not the most drool-worthy item, maybe, but it's cool. If I have any nits to pick, I feel like maybe glitterdust should be in the construction requirements, maybe. Being used against a specific spell in that fashion, to me, feels more like it's counterspelling than using darkness in a new way. But that's just me & very, very minor.
All in all...
This is cool; like I said, maybe not the hottest of all possible items, but really tight design more than compensates for that as far as being a contest entry. And while there have been a few items that came in well under word count and made me think they could have used some of that empty space to fill in some gaps, I don't feel that way here; with 177 words you created something that's more or less perfect as is. Well done. Congratulations and welcome to RPG Superstar!
This is a simple, powerful consumable with a nice concept. The short (by non-combat standards) duration keeps the item’s power in check. The weird yet logical interactions with glitterdust give it that old-school feel.
Good low-level/disposable items aren’t flashy, so I don’t have a lot to say about this, except that I appreciate the challenge of this kind of design, and you dealt with it well. I can’t really make much of a guess about what sort of a designer you are more generally yet; I look forward to finding out.
I like this one. I would buy it if it were a real item.
I like this, a weak item, cheap, consumable, well thought through with the glitterdust counter (in both directions)... nicely done. I don't know if I buy the idea of anyone with darkvision being able to see through the effect, but it's a nice limiting factor.
This is just what superstar's about. An innovative item that makes me wonder why we didn't have something like it before.
Color me impressed. Or mauve.
Though it's not the coolest item I've seen in the competition, it does fill a certain niche that, as RonarsCorruption mentioned, I'm surprised hasn't come up before with how simple and elegant it is. Any stealthy character that I played would stock up hardcore.
Kudos!
Five hours, still surprised that I'm here. Thank you for your comments.
Originally, glitterdust was part of the item (it was conceptualized as a reverse glitterdust), but it increased it's price a bit beyond it's worth and I decided that the rule bending of magic items allowed me to fudge the effect without it.
Now how long until someone points out that format mistake that I noticed five minutes after submitting?
-Xander
I like this item. I also want to point out that this designer has the coolest last name ever :).
Ant Health Warning: this year, I really worked hard on technical execution of my item, so these reviews will likely reflect template use. Brace yourselves for the template fu - it can sting.
Template Use: 8/10
From this thread, it looks like you posted your title in the first box of the submission form but did not include it in your entry box of the submission form. I docked 2 whole points for that you naughty person.
Slot affinity: 8/10
As its not a slot item, I decided to give a gut reaction score here. I quite like the visuals, so you scored well.
Abuseability: 7/10
I had some unanswered questions on this item. Could gust of wind blow the dust off? What about weather - windy/rain - thus affecting outdoor use perhaps? So as there were questions I felt could crop up in game play, I knocked you a few points here.
I also wondered if there might be the opening for DM's allowing darkness to be made permanent (permanency) for use by nefarious nasties.
Desirability: 8/10
Wasn't sure on this one, I like it, I can see some uses for it both as a DM and a player, so I gave a gut score here too.
Originality: 8/10
Tinkerbell was the inventor of dust sprinkling dust magic, so you got tinker'd for a couple of points.
Ant Score: 39/50 (78%)
Hm. First I thought this as a simple spell-in-a-can darkness, but with little innovative work this came through as a mighty fine wondrous item. I'm not sure why everyone says that 600 gp is a cheap consumable, but maybe my characters are just always too poor in low levels =).
First of, congratulations on making it this far. Best of luck with your organization.
That said, while I like your item, it doesn't have me all that amazed. Your organization will have to show me a little more than a reversal of glitterdust.
|
. This grants the creature concealment (20% miss chance) in normal light or total concealment (50% miss chance) in dim or less light and grants bonuses to Stealth as if the creature was invisible. The darkness is thin enough that the creature can see out of it with no penalties.
Highlighted part mine. some munchkin-y sneak attackers might like this.
I like this item at first glance, but the more I analyze it, the more I question its details.
It's weird to see the [darkness] descriptor in an Aura. I don't think there's precedent for that. Even a gem of brightness doesn't have the [light] descriptor.
I don't like that this item interacts with illumination significantly differently from a real source of light or darkness. If you use darkness to pull down the illumination level from normal to dim (or whatever), I can whip out light to bring it back up. That's fair. But this item's effect is based on ambient illumination without adjusting ambient illumination, so there's nothing I can do to negate it unless I've got a spell that creates bright light... and before 5th level, I do not. Even if I've got a bad-ass magic lantern that locks the local illumination level at normal against all darkness effects, this darkness powder still works. I would have liked to see something more integrated into the existing system (e.g., the dust lowers the illumination level by one step in the user's square).
The second sentence suffers from unclear construction. I can't tell whether the +20 bonus to Stealth applies in both normal and dim light or only in the latter.
The pricing bothers me a a bit, too. You would basically use this dust for two things: A) concealment or B) stealth. But potions of blur and potions of invisibility both cost half of what this dust does, and both last three times as long. On top of that, this stuff is defeated by a relatively common 2nd level spell, by darkvision, and by a sunny day. The only time you'd want this dust is in precisely dim illumination that you can keep dim, or if you know you're going up against glitterdust. This is one of those nasty niche items that is only useful for specialized end-runs around a particular subsystem (in this case, illumination).
All that said, the concept is strong, the interaction with glitterdust is cool and the design is thoughtful. I'm really curious to see what you come up with in the next round, Xander. Congratulations.
This is really clever! Low level, fills a niche (sometimes it feels like everything has already been done), I'd buy it. You'd get my vote!
@John Bennett - You might be bias.
@Anthony Adam - First, slotless is awesome, everyone likes them, why don't you?
Second, do any of those effect a darkness spell (Or a glitterdust spell for that matter)? Once it's applied it's a darkness spell on your skin and it isn't 'real' darkness'. Maybe there should be a penalty for Heal checks while using it. And I don't think you can turn magic item effects permanent via that spell.
Third, the faeries I know are much more terrifying than Tinkerbell
@Salama - tell your GM he needs to give you more money. Don't tell him what you're going to spend it on yet. Unless you want to be attacked by kobold rogues using dustings of darkness to protect themselves.
@Luthia - One of the problems with one shot items is that they tend to be good, but not as exciting. Good enough that people will spend that much for them, but not so much they they fear using them. The wow factor for next round is prepping. Hopefully those gnomes I hired got it working properly.
@Cpt_kirstov - I play lots of rogues. Does it show?
@OwlbearRepublic - the descriptor is the mistake I noticed five minutes after I submitted.
Compared to similar spells: take into account it gives a better bonus than blur when used properly (say in a dungeon, or at night) and doesn't disappear as soon as you attack like invisibility. Someone might even waste an invisibility purge trying to find you. You could even have an invisibly spell on and the dustings to prevent someone from glitterdusting you.
Getting back to how you can't dispel it early on, that's why the short duration. A usual darkness spell at 3rd level lasts for 30 rounds, compared to the personal spell vanish which last 5 rounds (it always lasts five rounds because it's so powerful), and vanish ends if you attack. So I made it twice as long as vanish since any non human in the party can probably see through it anyway, it's not as dangerous as invisibly
@InVinoVeritas - Couple reasons. dust of twilight is an offensive spell while this effect isn't and secondly it would cost twice as much and be spell in a can.
@Cleaver - thank you!
And I have spent too much time in here. Off to found an organization.
-Xander
Hey Alexander, congratulations! Yours is going to be the first item other my own that I'll be commenting on. Brace yourself!
What I Like
This is great. I always look forward to the low level consumables that pop up each year. Remember that Pharasma-y wafer that keeps party members from rising as undead? I place this as being about the same caliber. It definitely has a wide range of applications, and you kept it simple. The game needed this. Good job!
Needs Improvement
The item is slick indeed. I've nary a nit to pick. The item doesn't have much flavor description, but it doesn't need it. It makes its own flavor!
How I Feel About You as an Opponent
I'm not sure yet. This item is simple, especially in the descriptive department, so it's hard to get a read on you just yet. I look forward seeing what you've got!
@Anthony Adam - First, slotless is awesome, everyone likes them, why don't you?
I didnt say I didnt like slotless, it's just my scoring this year looks at slot affinities as one of the components.
To ensure a fair comparable score, if the item is slotless, it would be wrong to give it 0/10 or 10/10 as that would skew the scoring. So when an item is slotless, I give a gut instinct score of first impressions instead, that way every item gets 5 marks totalling a score up to 50 maximum.
(Basically, I try to score based on themes I have seen discussed in forums for that year and the areas I have concentrated my efforts on. Where a theme is not applicable, I score an impression score to balance out the total scores for all items in a comparable way (for me that is).
That way I hope to be reasonably fair to all entries and hopefully learning myself in the process.)
Hope that makes it clearer.
p.s. I have failed to make Top 32 5 years running now, so you can ignore or look at my feedback as you see fit. I wont be offended if you ignore it as I may be just as wrong as right.
I really like this item from both a player and Gm standpoing. I've created an item similar to this on the fly without actually going through the rules, but it was based off the Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder from Harry Potter.
One of my players *always* prepares Glitterdust and I fervently hate that spell for my sneaky types, while he loves telling everyone it's his favorite spell. It's supposed to be the second level anti-invisibility equivalent, yet invisibility ends when you attack while the glitter in Glitterdust lasts until the spell ends or is disspelled.
My rogues are going to be carrying your Dustings of Darkness as a rule from now on. I look forward to seeing what else you come up with.
I like this item a lot, though I can only get so excited about consumables.
I have a question, though. Is the concealment sentence intended to be read this way (concealment)^(total concealment + invisibility) or this way (concealment^total concealment)+invisibility? I am nearly certain that it is the former by gut feeling, but the actual sentence structure implies the latter. (If it had been "grants concealment or grants total concealment and invisibility," I would understand it more than "grants concealment or total concealment and grants invisibility.") I feel it should have been broken into a series of conditionals for clarity.
The above is a very minor nitpick. I'd definitely grab a handful of these for any sneaky character.
This is hands down my favourite item. I think that coming up with a low cost item is very hard, and pulling it off well deserves some yays. So yay :).
I guess this is a "keep it simple stupid" item. Cool effect, I'd like to see a more powerful version. Would be cooler but I understand the lower-powered appeal of this one.
Good luck.
Okay, I know I've said it before, but congratulations again.
Time for a little more depth in my look on your item.
Initial reaction Okay, I'll admit I was no fan first of, partially because I don't like the name much. But your item has actually gone and grown on me. And, compared to many other items, I'm actually starting to like it. The effect is something that the game doesn't have yet. That's neat.
Analysis
Name: I've said it before, but I think I should explain. The x of y formula doesn't bother me. I like allitteration. So what bothers me so about this name? "Dustings". I can't help but wonder why you had to choose "Dustings". First, sure there's multiple particles, but we normally call that "Dust". Now, I get you, "Dust of Darkness", sounds done. I'm actually fairly sure there's a dozen items called that. But that doesn't make me like "Dustings" - first it's a plural of an -ing form of the verb "to dust" (which, I admit, is smart, since it also means to remove dust (noun)). It may be just me, who's not a native English speaker, but "Dustings" sounds weird to me.
Price: It's low, really low, even, but oh what, the effect actually seems fairly fitting for what it does. I'd maybe put it an inch higher for small reasons, such as the fact that it is one very cheap concealment effect. However, noone would probably buy it, if it was much more expensive, so I guess you've hit a decent spot for a low level consumable.
Template: I see one issue, the lack of title in the post itself. I don't like that much, but it's not critical. I'll let it slip for an oversight, especially since the rest looks good.
Effect: It's definitely not a SiaC. It does, maybe have slight SAK of stealth tendencies, but it works for me. I'm not bothered by it's multiple effects at all. If anything, I'd actually like a small Stealth bonus, added to the concealment (or, maybe replacing it) in darkness, but I guess that wouldn't be hard for me to add myself, as an impromptu bonus on the spot.
Originality: It does something well needed, both for GMs and players, and at a low level. It's original, it's useful, and while it'll probably go out of use at higher levels, it's a solid low level item. I can appreciate that.
Description: Looks good. Nothing seems to bother me and everything seems clear and easily understood.
Well done, good luck further on.
Clarifications, round two!
First thanks for all the comments, now...
@Chris Shaeffer - No flavor? It's dustings of darkness, not dust, so not dehydrated darkness, but the little bits of darkness left behind after the Sun dusts. Technically I could have called it dustbunny of darkness, but then I would have been an autoreject via #12 (item is a joke).
Nice visual though isn't it?
@Anthony Adam - Trust me, I am very good at receiving criticism and I know how it's meant to be taken. And I love salt. I'm still not sure how rating something that is slotless is different from any slotted item but it doesn't really matter as long as you rate all items the same, does it?
And if you think it deserves a slot, declare it a hat, since that is the only slot I can see a dustbunny holding.
@Tels - Peruvian Instant Darkness Powder was definitely in my head while creating this.
@Isaac Duplechain - This is almost verbatim from the darkness spell description. It reiterates the concealment rules based on ambient light. It's not total concealment + invisibility, it's total concealment = invisibility, ie, you might have to guess the square and even if you guess right you have a 50% chance to hit and can't do precision damage.
@Cassey - thanks!
@Ragwaine - the more powerful version would probably be a cloak (or a hat) and I'm not sure that anyone would want to give up those slots for an ability that really only works on humans.
@Luthia - I just didn't want to be another dust, so I looked it up and dustings, is a viable word(according to Google) for what ends up in your dustpan. Feel free to think of them as dustbunnies if that makes more sense (it makes me giggle every time I say it).
-Xander
I get your choice, and it is a viable word (and better than dustbunnies too). I might have liked "sand" or "powder" better, if we are to avoid the dust - which I agree with you on being a little overused. I think I'll mentally call it "Darkening Powder" from now on. I think I like that slightly more. Honestly, a word for what ends up in your dustpan is slightly less dignified than a powder. We are talking Wondrous items, after all, not "Everyday Household" items. Joke aside, it's more that it bothered me a little, and I can be nitpicky over such things at times. I might have liked just "Dusting" better than "Dustings".
PCs who rely on invisibility hate glitterdust spells. Almost all of them will love this item. (In fact, I have one player who I hope never reads this item's description!) Well played, sir!
Congratulations Alexander,
Darkness. Such a useful spell, a staple in fact and something every rogue asks the casters to prepare. This even touches a bit of Looney Toons nostalgia. I can see a thorough grasp of design in the writing too (concealement, darkvision, countering). Nice Job, I hope you go far.
I see a lot of people find issue with the name, and witht he effect of this item, maybe a more appropriate name would be Shadow Powder. You sprinkle it on, and hide in shadows.
Hehe, Flour Power!!!
I like this item, and it is always excellent to see inexpensive, lower level magic items. These are the sort of things that DMs love to be able to hand out in treasure hauls.
I know it isn't part of a typical wondrous item, but I can imagine what unusual materials the dust might consist of, or what it might feel like for a character to apply. A DM could have a lot of fun playing with a player's mind the first time the character uses the dust.
Thanks, Power Word Unzip and Curaigh.
I see a lot of people find issue with the name, and witht he effect of this item, maybe a more appropriate name would be Shadow Powder. You sprinkle it on, and hide in shadows.
Hehe, Flour Power!!!
I'm starting to think shadow sand. Honestly I didn't obsesses too much over the name. I don't think the judges have ever rejected something just because of it's name was crappy.
I know it isn't part of a typical wondrous item, but I can imagine what unusual materials the dust might consist of, or what it might feel like for a character to apply. A DM could have a lot of fun playing with a player's mind the first time the character uses the dust.
That's one of the things that make me not want to change the name. "you find a bag with something in it. The stuff is kind of sticky and greasy. Smells like then underside of your couch... Yeah, it magical."
-Xander
Contributor, RPG Superstar 2012
,
Star Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9
|
Congratulations, Alexander! A lot of times in this competition, the items shoot for the moon. It's great to see an item with a clear, concise theme which a 1st level character can use.
Good luck in the next round! I look forward to seeing your organization.
Threat Analysis
You could be serious competition because.... you were unanimously voted into the Top 32, and for good reason. You've designed an item that makes me wonder why such an obvious concept hasn't been done before, and done it using clean, simple mechanics.
You could become an even bigger threat in future rounds if... you start applying yourself to areas of the rules that are more exciting than the rules for illumination. Although, with your item, even those rules start to look interesting...
During my game Friday night I was arguing about illumination rules and all I could think was 'this is my claim to fame, don't argue with me!'
-Xander
OK, I'm starting to go through and try to make comments on everyone's items.
As others have said, you've got a nice solid lower-level consumable here. I really like the idea of the light basically dimming around you, and mechanically it's very interesting. It's a nice choice if you need to sneak a bit but don't want to use a potion of invisibility, and I could see my players enjoying this.
So I used your Dustings in my game on Sunday to great effect. I'm currently running Curse of the Crimson Throne and the party just finished History of Ashes and are a little behind compared to where they need to be to start the next book. To solve this, I had them start Seven Swords of Sin, kind of as training for comes up in book 5, Skeletons of Scarwall. There was a scenario with 4 fighter/rouges (after one they ran into in the marketplace managed to flee and alert the group to new players in the city) setting up an ambush that the party would normally have steam rolled through, instead became a fairly challenging encounter.
In the party, there is a dwarven rogue/shadowdancer that has received a lot crap because in HoA he was seriously out of his element and had a hard time really functioning to his maximum potential. They made fun of him a lot, despite that fact that at one point, the area was thrown into magical darkness and the dwarf was enchanted to fight anyone who tried to prevent him from reading some cursed writing, and he nearly accomplished a TPK while only having 1 hp at the time.
Up against the thugs with the dustings on, suddenly they were very glad to have someone that could see through the darkness. One of my players that shot 9 arrows and hit 3 times (a 50% miss chances effects him 66% of the time :P ) said he hated the item... but only because they had it and he didn't. :)
They now have two uses of the Dustings, and one of them is being held in reserve so the Mystic Theurge can reverse engineer it.
I like the attention to the different light conditions and interaction with glitterdust, though it does seem like a lot of mechanics for a consumable lasting a minute. That said, a few of my characters who dwell in darkness would love this item.
|
Contributor, RPG Superstar 2012
,
Star Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 9
|
So I used your Dustings in my game on Sunday to great effect. I'm currently running Curse of the Crimson Throne and the party just finished History of Ashes and are a little behind compared to where they need to be to start the next book. To solve this, I had them start Seven Swords of Sin, kind of as training for comes up in book 5, Skeletons of Scarwall. There was a scenario with 4 fighter/rouges (after one they ran into in the marketplace managed to flee and alert the group to new players in the city) setting up an ambush that the party would normally have steam rolled through, instead became a fairly challenging encounter.
In the party, there is a dwarven rogue/shadowdancer that has received a lot crap because in HoA he was seriously out of his element and had a hard time really functioning to his maximum potential. They made fun of him a lot, despite that fact that at one point, the area was thrown into magical darkness and the dwarf was enchanted to fight anyone who tried to prevent him from reading some cursed writing, and he nearly accomplished a TPK while only having 1 hp at the time.
Up against the thugs with the dustings on, suddenly they were very glad to have someone that could see through the darkness. One of my players that shot 9 arrows and hit 3 times (a 50% miss chances effects him 66% of the time :P ) said he hated the item... but only because they had it and he didn't. :)
They now have two uses of the Dustings, and one of them is being held in reserve so the Mystic Theurge can reverse engineer it.
It is so cool to see an item from the competition used in a game!
|
Congrats on Top 32!
While I like this item, I can see players in games I GM thinking that this is more powerful then it actually is, and can also see some possible arguments at the game table crop up from time to time if a player decided to invest in a few doses of this.
That being said, there are only so many words you can use to try to prevent or explain away things like that in a wondrous item description (I did my best to be as clear as possible with my item, and then after submitting it ran into the same problems I saw with yours in the above paragraph, so I can relate) with a word count limit, and you did a bang-up job of covering most of the details that would crop up during game play and even if there were arguments the answers are right there in the description.
All in all, I really like this item as this game could use more cheap consumables for low-level play, and this one adds variety and flavor to that wondrous item niche. Kudos to you, sir, and looking forward to the rest of your entries.
Thanks for the additional comments everyone!
@Tels, it's awesome that you added to your game. I'm a little paranoid that my GM is going to add them to our game (only two of us can't see in the dark).
-X
Aura faint evocation (darkness); CL 3rd
Slot —; Price 600 gp; Weight —
Description
This shimmering black dust causes one creature to be coated in a layer of darkness for one minute. This grants the creature concealment (20% miss chance) in normal light or total concealment (50% miss chance) in dim or less light and grants bonuses to Stealth as if the creature was invisible. The darkness is thin enough that the creature can see out of it with no penalties.There is no effect while the creature is in bright light, though a DC 20 Perception check allows an observer to notice that the user is in less light than the area around them. Creatures with darkvision see through the dustings of darkness as if it were normal darkness. Applying dustings of darkness to someone affected by a glitterdust spell, removes the glittering effect, but not blindness if still present. Casting glitterdust on a creature under the affect of dustings of darkness neutralizes the dustings of darkness.
Construction
Requirements Craft Wondrous Item, darkness; Cost 300 gp
Disclaimer:
Note:
Fair is foul and foul is fair supposedly . Basically, though, does this item have any useful application in a spa?
Hmm. I suppose you could sneak this into the hair-care vials of irritating ostensibly female devils attending the spa at the same time. Some of those products are sufficiently dark and oily the addition of generous helping of this dust would go completely unnoticed.
Assuming for a moment that it’s more convenient to pay taxes than to circumvent the system, does this item look likely to be a tax-deductible business expense for a succubus art-dealer?
No. Whilst a number of possibilities spring to mind, the duration is too short, at only a minute, and the applications are too limited in it only functions on creatures.
Is the item useful in a strawberries-and-cream-tea context?
As with the previous answer, pretty much no.
Other Comments?
If I empty a pot of black paint over someone, it doesn't make them any more difficult to spot, irrespective of lighting conditions (although I am a (very advanced) succubus, so can naturally see in the dark). Nevertheless, according to the description on the packet this item effectively empties a pot of black paint over someone, and somehow does make them harder to notice. Either the description on the packet is wrong, or this is something else pretending to be evocation magic...
Gollum Rating: