You know you're in trouble when you get to the table and...


Pathfinder Society

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Slightly back on topic:

-Your DM has a little tiger stripe on his screen for every PC he's killed.
-TPKs are commemorated with a thunderbolt decal.
-Every time he runs out of room and has to layer over the old stuff, there's a little skull and crossbones sticker along the edge.
-He's been DMing since second edition. The screen is so worn and battered, its structural integrity is derived solely from the layers upon layers of stickers.

1/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.

wrong wrong wrong, its gold stars... not thunderbolts

5/5 5/55/55/5

3 people marked this as a favorite.
RainyDayNinja wrote:
Chris Bonnet wrote:

Your GM'ing the Waking Rune for 7 players at high tier.

The low warden is the only one with knowledge skills...

I plan on being able to out-Knowledge bards through my Lore Warden's entire career, thankyouverymuch.

Pageant of the peacock says you're out of luck.

Shadow Lodge 4/5 5/5 RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 8

6 people marked this as a favorite.
Quirel wrote:

Slightly back on topic:

-Your DM has a little tiger stripe on his screen for every PC he's killed.

Players here take their deaths in stride. In the back room of our FLGS we tack up all the PCs that die in homebrew (or AP) content, with big sharpied proclamations upon them, offering praise to the Paizo gods of gaming.

"HANSPUR IS APPEASED" - For my cleric that drowned after falling from a bridge.
"ZARONGEL IS APPEASED" - For our wizard that was killed by a charging goblin, atop his lizard mount.

Etc, etc.

Scarab Sages 5/5

Muser wrote:

It's disheartening to see the fly spell being misunderstood by so many.

It is actually a very simple spell. Cast on an individual fly gives a decent fly speed with good maneuverability. This doesn't allow anyone to auto-succeed in their checks other than maybe the Dex-monster rogue, but there's enough speed in the spell to make some of the maneuvers included in the Fly skill(raising, making difficult turns, etc) not so painful.

Making sure you know the rules of the spell AND the skill in question can be a tedious chore after so many sessions of perfect maneuverability and auto-success yes, but there are good sides to the whole issue: flight-involved fights last longer, making enemies more survivable, the least interesting flying adversaries, air elementals, are no longer untouchable and dragons of all things start to look silly with their horrible skill check antics!

Yes, learning to fly was an undertaking, but it was worth it.

(topic diverge) How do you apply fly to animal companions - is it natural for them, or is it a push, or is there a trick for animals to be used to fly from spells?

Grand Lodge 2/5 *

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

You don't get the bonus to fly based on your maneuverability unless you can fly naturally.

"A creature with a natural fly speed receives a bonus (or penalty) on Fly skill checks depending on its maneuverability: Clumsy –8, Poor –4, Average +0, Good +4, Perfect +8. Creatures without a listed maneuverability rating are assumed to have average maneuverability." PRD


That surely can't be RAI - does the Good maneuverability granted by Fly do anything else?

Silver Crusade 1/5

ArmouredMonk13 wrote:

...the word Blackros is in the name.

...the word Blackros is in the venture captain's briefing.
...the word Blackros is uttered by a single individual within 10 miles of the venture captain's briefing room.
I have seen and had a lot of Blackros TPKs/near TPKs

...the scenario is titled ***SPOILER*** and you aren't the GM.

You are aware that you opened a spoiler and closed a URL [spoiler]like this?[/url]?

That...doesn't do anything. ;)


1 person marked this as FAQ candidate.
trollbill wrote:


...your life oracle whose cracked out for healing and buffing asks who the best damage dealer in the party is and the answer comes back, "You."

This one has happened Me being the oracle of life cracked out for healing granted we were fighting A LOT OF UNDEAD, but man channel smite OP

Shadow Lodge 4/5

Matthew Downie wrote:
That surely can't be RAI - does the Good maneuverability granted by Fly do anything else?

Note that the fly itself gives a bonus to Fly checks, so I think the distinction between natural and non-natural is intentional.

Dhjika wrote:
(topic diverge) How do you apply fly to animal companions - is it natural for them, or is it a push, or is there a trick for animals to be used to fly from spells?

No, yes, no but see the spell air walk(the write up includes a bonus trick that can be taught to them).

5/5

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Quote:
You know you're in trouble when you get to the table and...

... everybody just wants to talk about the Fly mechanic.

Dark Archive 2/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.

... the party sorcerer begins chanting Hastur, Hastur, Hastur, Hastur, Hastur as soon as you run encounter the Spawn of Yog-Sothoth in

Spoiler:
Carrion Hill

Grand Lodge 5/5

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...you hear the words "dinner party"

Dark Archive 2/5

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... you hear the words "Blakros Museum"

Silver Crusade 5/5

3 people marked this as a favorite.

you hear silence at the table when you ask " so can anyone use my character's cure light wounds wand?"

Shadow Lodge 4/5

Patrick Harris @ MU wrote:
Quote:
You know you're in trouble when you get to the table and...
... everybody just wants to talk about the Fly mechanic.

Sorry, I'll stop now!

It's just that I've been through hell! HELL!

Shadow Lodge

1 person marked this as a favorite.

.... one of the characters tries to hold his crossbow "gangster style" in the hopes that it grants a bonus on intimidate... to hit... damage.... anything really
... the party (or one member of the party) guts every animal we kill to see if they have treasure inside like in video games.
... someone asks with all seriousness how many hit points the tornado has.... then they ask how many the ground has
... the dwarf with int and wis as dump stats carves "this end twords the enemy" on all his weapons
... the creation of each character takes over 10 source books each
... the elf claims that he knows the vulcan neck pinch without stunning fist, and only has 3 ranks in heal
... one of the characters has exotic weapon proficiency, weapon focus, and weapon specialization (nuke)
... the same goes for siege engines if the character is level 3 or below

5/5 *****

Muser wrote:
It is actually a very simple spell. Cast on an individual fly gives a decent fly speed with good maneuverability.

While the Fly spell does call out good manoeuvrability arguably that doesn't give you any benefit. From the fly skill:

Quote:
A creature with a natural fly speed receives a bonus (or penalty) on Fly skill checks depending on its maneuverability: Clumsy –8, Poor –4, Average +0, Good +4, Perfect +8.

The spell does however give a caster level based bonus to Fly checks.

The addition of the Fly skill was one of the more bizarre additions in the transition from 3.5 to PF and really just served to make life more difficult for non spell casters given they will struggle to actually take anything in the skill.

*

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Lord Foul II wrote:
... the creation of each character takes over 10 source books each

Ughh! (..."but I dinnae bring them, they're at my parents house.")

Also

...after introducing your character by class the GM gives you a squinty-eyed stare and blurts "I HATE YOU!"

...the rest of the table gives you a squinty-eyed stare as if to say You've doomed us ALL!

Liberty's Edge 2/5

3 people marked this as a favorite.

...when a briefing turns into Ferris Beulers Day Off.
"Any questions? Any questions? Questions? Questions? Questions?"

Silver Crusade 4/5 5/5

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Zach Williams wrote:
This all comes down to tactics. High level play success is 65% tactics, 30% party comp, %5 build type

If the 5% party comp includes a 2W Fighting Dbl Barreled Pistol Gunslinger you don't need the other 95%.

Scarab Sages 5/5

Rorary Prisock wrote:
Zach Williams wrote:
This all comes down to tactics. High level play success is 65% tactics, 30% party comp, %5 build type
If the 5% party comp includes a 2W Fighting Dbl Barreled Pistol Gunslinger you don't need the other 95%.

unless the mod takes place entirely underwater, or attacks attack from second increment with their long bows

though I thought the weapon cord change took care of the worst of the overkill of that build.

------------

... everyone has their source books on pdfs, there are not plugs in the room, and its the third slot of the day.

Grand Lodge 4/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Someone insists on playing a 3rd or 4th level Investigator at a table of Bonekeep part 1....after that experience plays the same character at Bonekeep part 2.

Dark Archive 2/5

5 people marked this as a favorite.

... those tacos you ate before the game kick in.

Dark Archive 4/5 5/5 ****

2 people marked this as a favorite.

...a player proclaims that his character is a TWF double pistol pistolero mysterious stranger gunslinger using weapons cords to facilitate rapid reload.

Shadow Lodge 4/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens Subscriber
Dhjika wrote:
... everyone has their source books on pdfs, there are not plugs in the room, and its the third slot of the day.

And this is why the gods invented portable tablet batteries with 15 hours of charge. :3 Saved my ass at a convention once.

Scarab Sages 5/5

The Morphling wrote:
Dhjika wrote:
... everyone has their source books on pdfs, there are not plugs in the room, and its the third slot of the day.
And this is why the gods invented portable tablet batteries with 15 hours of charge. :3 Saved my ass at a convention once.

Such items are a blessing - I went on a 6 day sail on a ship with no engine (19th century schooner) or power ports and I kept my tablet, ipod and such powered with such things.

However, I forgot to taken them to DragonCon one year and regretted it greatly.

Silver Crusade

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...you hear the GM on the phone go, "Don't worry, I can meet you for lunch. This won't take long."

Lantern Lodge 5/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.

...one of your fellow players says "I want to go check out the room with the haunt, again."

True story...

Temple of Empyreal Enlightenment:
The group of first and second level PCs I took through were afflicted by the haunt more than once. Not to mention that they regularly had split parties, so only two people were there each time...

4/5

Your enlarged rage prophet is the only one able to fight two large mooks in a hallway constraining the fight to just those 3. The rage prophet can only be hit on a nat 20 so the rest of the party charges forward to the BBEG....
10 rounds later with the rage prophet out of spells(cast all heals) the party barely managed to survive a black tentacles and two Yeth Hounds, which made two other PCs flee the entire combat.

Shadow Lodge 2/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.

...someone immediately brags that, because he's been doing this since 1st or 2nd Edition, he doesn't have to listen to anyone else.

How That Turned Out:
I lock each one in masterwork manacles. "You have the right to remain silent, you have the right to a fair trial, you have the right to find someone to speak on your behalf."

-"Great! I coup de grace them as they're made helpless!"

"What the Abyss, man!?"

Liberty's Edge 3/5 Venture-Agent, Australia—QLD

in a rp heavy combat light scenario (in fact it had only 2 combats in it) you, as GM almost get a TPK against a full group of 6....... the only reason they live is you gimp your rolls or roll really bad when they needed it!

(This has happened to me)

or

the party spends 2 hours doing the rp component for a backstory of a scenario meaning that a scenario that should take 4 hours max...gets pushed out to 6 or 7 hours lol

Sovereign Court

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The party consists of 3 paladins, and a bard, and the only player willing to talk to anyone is your CHA 5 Dwarf. (happened at GenCon)

Dark Archive 2/5

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... the GM keeps trying to play footsie with you under the table.

The Exchange 4/5

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your playing your conjuring/ teleporting wizard and the dungeon is Dimensional locked. half my 4th and above spells are no longer good. :(

Silver Crusade 1/5 *

The Beard wrote:
... the GM keeps trying to play footsie with you under the table.

DUDE! I told you it kept feeling like there were spiders crawling on my leg. And you promised me you wouldn't tell anybody!


2 people marked this as a favorite.

"A vargouille kisses you and then nausea sets in!!"

5/5 5/55/55/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.
The Beard wrote:
... the GM keeps trying to play footsie with you under the table.

.... and they play golf.

Shadow Lodge 2/5

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...the Warhammer 40k players at the table told you PFS was yesterday.

Grand Lodge 4/5

3 people marked this as a favorite.
Kelly Youngblood wrote:
... your magus with a wand of Infernal Healing is the party healer.

... your magus with a wand of cure light wounds is the party healer.

Spoiler:
Unfortunately true. My magus, UMD of +5 or +7 at the time, is the only spellcaster at the table, except maybe for an Ezren, and is the only PC with any sort of healing available. Yes, one CLW wand. Got that 1 after 7 successes.

2/5

3 people marked this as a favorite.

... you're 10 minutes late and you're the first to arrive.

Liberty's Edge 2/5

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Jason Hanlon wrote:
... you're 10 minutes late and you're the first to arrive.

...your the GM, 20 minutes late, and everyone is there, discussing how awesome their character is.

:P

5/5 5/55/55/5

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Hello, I'm Troy Mclure. You may remember me from such adventures as "all the doors are trapped", "no there's no save for that", and "of course you're not getting a perception check" Today I'm sending you to the scenic caverns of...


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...your rogue in studded leather is wearing the heaviest armor in the party.

The Exchange 5/5

2 people marked this as a favorite.
BigNorseWolf wrote:

Hello, I'm Troy Mclure. You may remember me from such adventures as "all the doors are trapped", "no there's no save for that", and "of course you're not getting a perception check" Today I'm sending you to the scenic caverns of...

"No, you can't take 10 on a Perception check!" & "Taking 20 on Perception? You know how long that will take?!"

5/5 5/55/55/5

nosig wrote:
BigNorseWolf wrote:

Hello, I'm Troy Mclure. You may remember me from such adventures as "all the doors are trapped", "no there's no save for that", and "of course you're not getting a perception check" Today I'm sending you to the scenic caverns of...

"No, you can't take 10 on a Perception check!" & "Taking 20 on Perception? You know how long that will take?!"

Some perception checks you can't (usually the one that means you just stepped in a heaping pile of monster)

If they ask, you can tell them taking 20 on a perception check takes

perception check= move action= 2/6 seconds= 1/3 seconds 20= 1 minute.

The Exchange 5/5

1 person marked this as a favorite.
BigNorseWolf wrote:
nosig wrote:
BigNorseWolf wrote:

Hello, I'm Troy Mclure. You may remember me from such adventures as "all the doors are trapped", "no there's no save for that", and "of course you're not getting a perception check" Today I'm sending you to the scenic caverns of...

"No, you can't take 10 on a Perception check!" & "Taking 20 on Perception? You know how long that will take?!"

Some perception checks you can't (usually the one that means you just stepped in a heaping pile of monster)

If they ask, you can tell them taking 20 on a perception check takes

perception check= move action= 2/6 seconds= 1/3 seconds 20= 1 minute.

"what? nah, it's one round for each square - and if you don't like that, I could require different rolls for Traps, Loot, and monsters, oh! and a 4th roll for secret doors and hidden items. but I'm being nice and letting you cover all that with one roll. Yeah, and remember that that doesn't cover the wall - which isn't in the square it's beside it, or the roof - which is 10' overhead and so counts as a different 5' square. Looks like we could be at this all day."

really... (eye-roll)

2/5

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You know you're in trouble when you get to the table and the GM is explaining why taking 20 on a perception check will literally take all day long.

The Exchange 5/5

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Jason Hanlon wrote:
You know you're in trouble when you get to the table and the GM is explaining why taking 20 on a perception check will literally take all day long.

LOL! yeah, except it's normally after the first trap goes off ("you didn't check that square!") rather than as you sit down at the table.

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