"Oh, humans are awesome, they know how to cook, tell campfire stories of distant lands. We can all be friends. A single twig is a easy to break, but a bundle of them tied together, not so." Ziphora replies.
Yes, but the best part of all, about the humans, is that they have hands. With real, live thumbs. Have you got those? Tomorbataar bends down to inspect the lizards.
The lizardfolk do, indeed, have thumbs.
The lizard-chief's question sends Hothead into a bout of quiet introspection. "You know... I'm not really sure," he finally answers. "It's really funny, you'd think that I would remember... I'm sure we're being paid really well for this, though..." he falls silent once more before remembering that they were supposed to be, you know, negotiating and stuff. "Oh, where are my manners? I'm Hothead, pleased to meet you! The other blue heads are Ziphora and Tomorbataar, the one that smells a bit like a cat is Dru-Head, the one with a dull look in his eyes is Blockhead, and the kinda creepy one is called Hungry," he introduces everyone, trying to give the lizardfolk as good a first impression as he can manage.
The humans asked us to do stuff for them for food so we did stuff for them. Aaannd... that's it really. Weird.
The lizardfolk chief seems to relax a bit at your answers. "Ah, I see. Yes, perhaps we all be friends. There are problems we have you might help, and food we have to share. Now, I ask human, what soft-skins do here?"
"We just want to rebuild the road," Rorl replies, "So that trade may flow through here again. We don't want to bother you or your land."
Chief Kassmak thinks for a moment. "You come no close to swamp than old road?"
"We won't come any closer to your swamp than the old road," Sgt. Rorl agrees.
"Good, good," Kassmak says, turning back to you. "Now, I would speak of how we may be friends. But first, is time for feast!"
He claps his hands, and soon, a large group of lizardfolk comes into view from behind a thick tangle of vegetation. They're carrying a variety of foods--meats, berries, and vegetables--and soon set them before all of the parties in the negotiations. They set a plate laden with cooked meat in front of each of you heads.
"We talk more after we eat!" The chief proclaims, then digs in. Rorl shrugs slightly and starts eating. Behind you, even Mo has a plate.
Good, good, I'm famished. Please tell me, how long has the food been dead? Tomorbataar asks this nervously, sniffing at his plate while he does.
We've made an agreement with the humans, several, actually. Really it's like we've conscripted them to make our armor, and they've petitioned us to help them with a few of their little troubles.
"We should share stories while we eat. Humans do so. They call them campfire stories. We used to live in the forest before we heard some noises and we decided to check them out. Lo and behold, it was the humans!" She looks at Chief Kassmak inquisitively. "What's your story?"
Kassmak nods at the lizardfolk sitting at his right hand, who seems to already be done eating. He stands up and launches into a long tale, detailing how the ancestors of the Turessk tribe had come up the river and found a lovely swamp here, but had to fight the many dangerous creatures that already called it home for the land before they were able to build their village.
"Wow. Do you keep trophies of those you fought against? Can you show them to me?" Ziphora asks.
But...but...the swamp's not lovely. It's muddy and full of half dead things floating in the water...fermenting. Why would anyone want to leave a nice clear river for the swamp?
"Remember Tomorbataar, there is no accounting for taste," Hothead sagely opines before turning his attention back to his food.
What? Taste? Things taste good or bad, depending on how good they are. So all you have to do to account for them is find out how good the food is. Tomorbataar looks at the lizardman, how good is this food?
"Every chief must hunt a great beast before he is accepted by the tribe. These teeth are from the beasts so hunted," Chief Kassmak says, holding up one of the necklaces of teeth around his neck. "This was mine--an alligator almost as long as you are. He points to one of the larger teeth.
"The food is quite good, I assure you," he replies to Tomorbataar. "I would think you would understand better than the soft-skins the value of the swamp--how one can hide and hunt unseen within it, how it give the advantage to those familiar with it."
"No, things taste good or bad depending on what kinds of things the person in question likes. The only way to know for sure is trying it yourself, not asking someone else," Hothead insists.
While that stuffs going on Dru-head tries to find the lizardfolk that spoke with him from the water.
"Oooh! Food's here!"Ziphora tries the food.
Dru-head notices that the lizardfolk that spoke to him earlier... is still hanging out in the water, watching from a distance.
"Hey, guys, the food's good!Chief Kassmak, I would like to compliment your cook. Your food has a truly unique flavour."Between mouthfuls, speaking with her mouth full, "It's got this aroma I can't quite place. How does your cook do that?"
Dru-head realizes he can't wave and sulks.
There's not great hiding spots since they're all so wet and pasty. I'd rather wait out in the open, but really the only solution is to leave. The swamp's just no good. At least, however, there are some nice big animals lying about, waiting to die. With that, Tomorbataar reaches down and begins biting off chunks of meat. Good indeed, though perhaps a bit too squishy. Maybe if you burnt it more?
Chief Kassmak clearly had not been anticipating discussing the culinary arts with a hydra.
"I am not certain... I will tell of your compliments, however," he says. He does seem gratified by the compliments, at least.
Well, I suppose your chef is the expert here, so I shall respect his decision.
Once you're done eating, Chief Kassmak waves, and some of the other lizardfolk come forward and take the various platters away. Once everything has been cleared away he speaks again.
"Now, as I say, we speak of helping each other. For long time we have lived here, but not many days ago, bugbears come to valley. Already they hunt in our lands and attack my people whenever see them. So far none of the Turessk die, but several hurt badly before they escape. Soon bugbears be problem for humans, too, I think."
"So, I ask, if you help with bugbears, what you want from us in return? Much food, or something else?" He looks at you expectantly.
"Well, that depends," Hothead answers, looking a bit nervous. "Are we talking about bug-sized bears or bear-sized bugs? That would kind of affect how much you would have to pay,"
"Hmm...I'd like to learn different ways of cooking things from your cook." Ziphora comments.
Blockhead, who had been unusually quiet up to this point, suddenly gets excited... excited enough to smash the ground before speaking.
"Oh! You gots a raptorbunny?"
Chief Kassmak looks confused. "A... raptorbunny?" He looks over at Rorl.
"Big, scaly thing. Big teeth, small arms, but still has claws. Stands on its hind feet," Rorl explains, patiently.
"...No, we do not," Kassmak replies after thinking over the Sergeant's explanation.
"You sure?" Blockhead asks, giving the lizardman a suspicious look.
"Yes, quite sure," the chief responds.
Blockhead looks rather disappointed.
Yes, it seems the nature of the bug bears would affect our payment. They can't be too dangerous, though, if they haven't killed any of you yet, so I suppose a rather light payment is in order. Tomorbataar straightens himself up and looks around the swamp, considering his surroundings. Have you got any scrolls? Books, perhaps, or other things that were written?
"Few things we write," Kassmak replies, "But find others. Not many, only small number. But we can share."
He frowns and looks over at Rorl. "Is not bugbears word in human language?"
Sergeant Rorl nods his head. "It is." He looks up at you. "Bugbears are... well, they're like bigger, hairier humans... not as big as Mo, but still bigger. They're mostly known for killing people, burning villages down, and enslaving the survivors."
"Have you tried talking to them yet? Do you know what language they speak? We can try to negotiate with them." Ziphora suggests helpfully.
Well the, I suppose that is a good agreement. We shall nip at the bugbears and see what they have to say for themselves, and you shall give us several of your books. Tomorbataar finishes his meal, looking around for something to clean his spotless mouth with. Is there a pool of clean clear water around? He asks, absentmindedly.
"No, no, no. We talk to the bugbears, see if we can reach an agreement so we can get them to leave both lizards and humans alone. We do NOT start nipping first." As if picking up quirks from Blockhead, she thumps the ground, like a judge would bang his gavel.
Nipping, talking...I hear Blockhead has a good way to do one of those things from far away. Tomorbataar looks quite pleased with this comment for a moment, then turns to Blockhead perhaps a fraction of a second to late,
That's not an invitation.
"Bugbears can speak Common," Rorl responds before Kassmak can reply, "But they mostly use it to taunt people while they're slowly killing them. Maybe you can get them to talk instead of fight because you're much bigger than them, but humans have never had much luck without an army."
"If bugbears stop raids, we give you of our food and what writings we have find," Kassmak says, after the sergeant has finished speaking. "Is agreed, yes? I tell you how find their camp. Is about a day travel for my people up stream by two great willows. Maybe one of scouts show way?"
One of the lizardfolk that brought the food sets a large pot of water that looks fairly clean near-ish to Tomorbataar.
Interesting. Would they negotiate better or worse if we ate some of them?
Tomorbataar reaches out to inspect the pot, smelling it deeply before dunking his head in and swishing it around. He withdraws sparkling and wet, shaking his head somewhat. Well, that was sufficient. I think we should sleep first, and then follow your scouts.
"Obviously worse."Ziphora snaps. "How would you like it if I ate you up, then once you regrew, started negotiating? Negotiations should commence before any kind of hostilities. In fact negotiations were for preventing hostilities."
"We'll talk to them nicely, Chief Kassmak, to persuade them to stop the raids." She assures Chief Kassmak.
"So long as raids stop," Chief Kassmak agrees. "My scout find you in morning."
The lizardfolk send you off the next morning with another delicious meal, though the Chief doesn't participate this time. Once you've eaten, the lizardfolk scout arrives to lead you onward.
"I should go report to Sir Torlgrith," Rorl states as you prepare to go. "I don't think me being there would make much difference against a bunch of bugbears. Not with you and Mo."
"Don't worry. We can handle it, we'll be perfectly fine."Ziphora proclaims confidently, sticking her head up straight.
Me liking it wouldn't be the point, we don't want the bugbears to do what they want. They clearly want to hurt things, but if we eat a few, then they have to do what we want or get eaten more. That's...the real beauty of life. Tomorbataar stares off into the distance philosophically.
Tomorbataar enjoys his breakfast thoroughly, once again washing himself, this time insisting that the water be boiled first "to kill the little things".
Interesting. But Rorl, you know how to write things, don't you? Perhaps you could draw up a contract for us to get them to sign before you go?
"Oh oh! Why didn't I think of that? A contract! So that they can't go back on their agreement later because we have it in writing!"Ziphora exclaims, excitedly. "That's a great idea, Tom. Mo can hold the contract. We'll also need to provide them writing materials so they can sign it."Ziphora muses thoughtfully.
"Ummm..." He looks over at the lizardfolk scout, who looks back impassively. "I don't have anything to write on..."
"Leather? Charcoal? Really nothing at all?" Ziphora asks.