Opening the boxes that haven't yet burned, the goblins find a child's doll, 18 cloth diapers, four jars of moonshine, a sewing kit, six shiny white buttons, two more bottles of Magical Maggie's Miracle Medicine, and a fine kitchen knife .
In a lull in the screaming and singing, another sound becomes audible: the sound of a dog barking. It is coming from the interior of the farmhouse.
Poog's eyes glisten in fearful excitement. Death to barkers...
Reta stops scrounging through the shiny treasure as her ears perk up. She slowly turns her attention toward the sound and peers in said direction through narrowed eyes. Grinning wickedly, Reta grabs one of the medicine bottles and drinks a few draughts before placing it in her pack. She then grabs her club and readies her shield. she says in a sing song voice as she heads toward the farmhouse, keeping her eyes peeled in case of a surprise.
Chuffy takes a few steps back at the sound of the vile dog-beast-thing. He sees the feral glee in the others, however, and forces himself to go stand behind Reta.
At the sound of the barking, Smuz stops running in circles and snarls. He moves to stand beside Reta.
The young goblins approach the front porch of the farmhouse; the yapping is clearly coming from behind the closed door. Reta slowly opens it, revealing an open room with chairs and a wooden table. Several other doors are set in the walls, and an open corridor stretches away in the back left corner.
Reta makes her way in, looking around as she does. She then points to the door, she tells him, readying herself to pound on the animal with her mighty club.
Chuffy stands behind Reta ready to kill dog thing.
Smuz ponders only briefly over Reta's words. Their meaning is clear. He approaches the door. On reaching it, he takes his trusty knitting needle in one hand and with the other, reaches out and opens the door.
"No, Zarongul say doggie down that way," Poog pointedly stares down the corridor.
Reta looks in said direction that Poog points. She then waits a long moment, like, four seconds before raising a questioning eyebrow. She turns back and re-readies to kill the dog.
"Is cause it is dread doggie!" Poog shudders, "They be indivisbility and you only see eyes. And only when they bite."
Reta looking confused, she questions before her eyes go wide in anger. Reta looks all around in a near panic, never before having had to fight something she couldn't see. Reta puts herself in a defensive position as she keeps her eyes peeled for the unseen animal.
As Poog and Reta look for the dread doggie, Smuz, oblivious to their conversation, flings open the designated door. Behind it is a hairy, toothy canine creature with sinister moustaches! It lunges at Smuz.
From somewhere farther into the room, a voice can be heard: perhaps the voice of the dread doggie?
Poog. uh... seeks the tactical high-ground. On top of the table. Knees a-clatter.
Poog clambers atop the table.
Reta's eyes go wide at the sight of the dog. she says in her sing-song voice again. She then attacks it with her club.
Reta somehow manages to weave her club around Smuz and the edge of the doorway and deliver a heavy blow to the doggie, which yelps in pain.
Smuz yelps in pain and fear from the dog's vicious attack. He stabs blindingly quickly with his knitting needle, then hastily steps aside, nearly stumbling over the chair beside him.
Smuz's small needle punctures the dog's flesh, and it releases a piteous whine along with a gout of blood.
After Smuz steps to the side there is nothing between Chuffy and the dog. "Eek!" He quickly tosses a dart while he scuttles under the table to end up at H 23.
Dart
Chuffy's dart strikes the dog, and, with a yelp, it collapses into a hairy, mustachoied heap.
The Longshanks who had been partially concealed behind the door lets out a wail, grabs the canine body, and runs for the back door.
Feeling inadequate to the task of chasing, but fully equipped to defer the responsibility, Poog gestures grandly at the fleeing human. "Zarongoolee demands her head for harboring a dread doggie!"
Poog issues a fatwa.
Reta watches the longshank take off toward the door. Shrugging,
Smuz hesitates, trying to understand what Poog and Reta are saying and not having much luck. But noticing that neither of them are moving anywhere, he stays put too.
Chuffy gives chase, tossing darts at the fleeing longshanks.
Dart
Chuffy's thrown dart rattles off the door onto the wooden floor. The Longshanks pulls the door open and disappears out it, leaving it swinging behind her.
Chuffy will allow her to go. Mostly because no one else seems willing to go after her with him.
Poog looks what is on the table, besides him, so he can kick it off to make room for his celebratory dance. He beckons Chuffy join him (since Chuffy obviously the only one to follow Zarongel's decrees).
Chuffy does a dance like he's a character from the peanuts cartoon.
Reta watches the dance for about two and a half seconds before, She then proceeds to look through the house for anything of interest.
Poog and Chuffy perform the sacred Dance of Dread-Doggie-Slaying while Reta loots the farmhouse.
Reta ransacks the remainder of the farmhouse, cutting open mattresses and pillows. She finds a satisfying collection of wooden and metal kitchen utensils to prod, cut, and stab with.
Outside the farmhouse, the fleeing Longshanks encountered the rest of the Licktoad tribe and was felled, at the cost of a reasonable count of goblin casualties. Old Foofelah has taken possession of a bottle of the Longshanks's perfume, while Fat Slorb has hacked off the Dread Doggie's moustaches and attached them to his upper lip with the aid of some sticky mud.
Some clever goblin opened the animal pens, adding greatly to the chaos and distraction of the initial attack. Most of the livestock have either fled or are lying dead or dying around the farmyard, but one piglet made straight for the remains of the cake after it tumbled from the burning table and is now lying half-asleep and covered with muddy sugar-icing.
Slorb, stroking his pilfered moustache, announces, "Licktoads! Longshanks invaders is now defeated! Brinestump Marsh is being safe from horse-chimeras! Licktoad village is being safe from short Longshanks! Licktoads is winning! Licktoads is best!"
Unlike the piglet, soon to be christened Squealy Nord and led back to Licktoad Village, most of the goblins who overindulge in the cake end up sick, though some are only exhausted and sleep off the sugary meal in the farmhouse or on piles of straw in the barn. The color blue is quickly adopted by the priesthood as a sign of Zarongel's favor, and for generations, Licktoads will closely examine newborn whelps for patches of blue as powerful portents of both danger and opportunity. "Kettlehead," on the other hand, enters the oral lexicon as a vile insult for a lizardloving traitor.
THE END