Gregor shakes his head at the thought, "I would hate to resort to treating with lifetime criminals, or overly illicit means of accomplishing our mission." He looks at Pai as if he's never bothered to take note of her physique until she just now mentioned it being a problem. "Shouldn't be a problem if they have any medium to larger-sized half-orc women amongst their ranks. You'll just have to strap down with bindings or something. There are plenty of big women that wear armor, you're no great oddity that it can't be done or hasn't been done before. They don't let it hinder them, so don't stress that it will hinder you overmuch."
"Believe me, I don't want to use fenced goods as much as the next good person, but we should consider it a last resort."
"And given that the Queen only recruited beautiful women into the grey Maidens, I doubt there being any half-orcs in their ranks.
Though we might get lucky, if some grey maidens are Ulfen.
As Ulfen women have the stature that's close to mine and I also have Ulfen blood.
The chest can be strapped down, but only, oh so much, otherwise it get's very hard to breath.
The problem will likely be the thighs and hip, as they don't compress much."
Crain doesn't say much, simply enjoying Pai talking about her more pleasant areas, with a goofy grin on his face. "It was just a suggestion, you don't have to get all grumbled about it," he defends his idea, still smiling.
He nods in agreement, even blanching somewhat, as she mentions half-orc women and the maidens being beautiful. He even looks at her once again gauging the concern of beauty "Don't worry that your looks will betray the disguise, your face should allow you to get by. If you're worried, just keep the helm visor down. As for your shape being an issue, though, the best I could suggest is doing calisthenic exercises more frequently to lose weight where necessary. That is a long-term result, but for the immediate future, we may have to resort to transmutaions."
He almost begins to crack a smile, then regains his composure, "I have a wand of grease, but I don't think it will be enough for what we need if the armor's size really becomes a problem."
Mai gives Gregor the angry look at the comment on her figure and exercise
"I do calisthenic exercises every day.......
I just happen to have inherited a curvy figure."
Donagar always knew Gregor needed a few drinks in him for his humor to show....
"Dark deeds err afoot when Gregor starts tah crackin jokes!"
Drakus laughs along with Donagar.
Gregor holds up his hands toward Pai in a calming move, "I was merely trying to offer suggestions. I know what the female guards do to maintain their form. I didn't know if you were so inclined. To be fair, I did not bring up your body's issues with armor, you did."
Turning to Donager and Drakus, he scowls. Whether he is more mad at them for pointing out his unintended joke, or himself for making it, is unclear. "I was not trying to crack jokes. It was a thought, that I should have quelled before I spoke, but alas it escaped me. I was just brainstorming and had the lapse in judgement to think it aloud."
"With all tha talk o gettin ladies into err out o armor an tha greasy wand it is plain wha plans were a brewin!"
Donagar heads to the bar for a refill.....
DM....
Donagar requests the bard sing bawdiest song he knows...loudly during the meeting, and the barmaid bring drinks and place them in front of Gregor....
Yuuki goes to the table
"Sis, can you give me a hand in getting one of the caravan guard customers who is now on the floor into his room?"
Yuuki points to the drunk patron on the floor.
Mai replies with a sour and relieved smile
"I would be happy to help you with the customer."
and walks to the out cold patron.
Yuuki says to Gregor
"Looks like you don't know things about women,
If a woman talks about her figure, never say anything that could be taken negatively, either say positive things, or nothing at all."
She quickly goes to the drunk patron and with Pai's help get's the drunk to his room.
You all see Pai and Yuuki return downstairs a few moments later without the drunk.
Pai goes into the Kitchen.
and you hear some words in Tein, in Pai's voice;
Aho, Baka, and Boke
"Bwahaha, Gregor. When I am the most diplomatic at the table, that's a good sign! Call her heavy again, and I'll start looking even better to both them tall ladies. I might have misjudged you earlier," Crain says with a laugh, gesturing for the dwarf to get him a refill whil ehe was up.
Drakus heaved himself to his feet and draped an arm around Gregors shoulder.
"Gregor, you are a comrade in arms and I love you as a brother. But if you was ever to take a drink, now is the time."
He takes a slug of his.
"Because, this order we've got, well I got no training for it, no regs to follow, nothing I've been or seen can help with this. Alla that's just a hindrance now. So we gotta create one we never had before. We gotta do what you was doin' earlier, brainstormin'!"
He took his hand off Gregors shoulder and threw it wide.
"I donno, maybe set the roof on fire with an alchemist' fire arrow and go in dressed as firemen!"
He nodded vigourously.
"Or, or fake some orders to the Hellknights, get 'em ta serve a warrent on some of the bigwigs there.
"Or! Or pretend its a casino an' find where the sewers go under it, then tunnel up in there that way!
"You know, stuff like that!"
Yuuki says to Gregor
"Looks like you don't know things about women,
If a woman talks about her figure, never say anything that could be taken negatively, either say positive things, or nothing at all."
Gregor huffs in irritation, "If she didn't want her figure talked about, she shouldn't have brought it up. I'm just speaking the truth as I see it. What is gained by lying? All that does is set up false expectations. Why tell someone they sing beautifully if they do not? Then they try to earn a living as a performer, when they are not suited to it, and next thing you know they end up destitute on the street. They could have been an excellent carpenter if someone had told them the truth instead of only worrying about their feelings, but instead they have to learn the harsh reality from the world instead of those that do it in their best interests."
"Bwahaha, Gregor. When I am the most diplomatic at the table, that's a good sign! Call her heavy again, and I'll start looking even better to both them tall ladies. I might have misjudged you earlier," Crain says with a laugh, gesturing for the dwarf to get him a refill whil ehe was up.
He rolls his eyes at Crain's presumptions, "I think diplomacy is best served by the truth as well. Why make deals and promises to someone you cannot or are not able to uphold? For your information, I did not call her heavy. I never even used an insulting term. I merely offered suggestions for overcoming what I thought she was stating as a possible problem to the task at hand. Nothing more."
Drakus heaved himself to his feet and draped an arm around Gregors shoulder.
"Gregor, you are a comrade in arms and I love you as a brother. But if you was ever to take a drink, now is the time."
He takes a slug of his.
"Because, this order we've got, well I got no training for it, no regs to follow, nothing I've been or seen can help with this. Alla that's just a hindrance now. So we gotta create one we never had before. We gotta do what you was doin' earlier, brainstormin'!"
He looks at Drakus, first disapprovingly, then grateful. "This still is not time for drinking, especially in excess. You are right however, that we do need to continue to bandy ideas about to develop a plan of action to attack this task head on."
He took his hand off Gregor's shoulder and threw it wide.
"I donno, maybe set the roof on fire with an alchemist' fire arrow and go in dressed as firemen!"
He nodded vigourously.
"Or, or fake some orders to the Hellknights, get 'em ta serve a warrent on some of the bigwigs there.
"Or! Or pretend its a casino an' find where the sewers go under it, then tunnel up in there that way!
"You know, stuff like that!"
Wincing at some of the ideas, he retorts, "Although I appreciate your enthusiasm in brainstorming, some of your plans may have issue. I would not risk setting it on fire, as there are presumably ill citizens inside. We are doing this investigation for the citizens of this great city. Risking their lives in the process of doing so seems counter-productive."
"The idea of getting the Hellknights riled up against them has some merit, but for all their force and rigidity, they have less authority here than we do, and we are given less than these Grey Maidens. Though they could cause quite a distraction."
"That said, the underground entrance has merit. If we could cause a distraction with the Hellknights, while we sneak in a back entrance, that could prove effective. We need to look into the history of the building they work out of, and if anyone knows hidden passages to gain entrance. I don't expect we will move in immediately, but we must not dally here with drink for too long."
"Aye Gregor! now thas a plan Drakus, Crain an I ken get real drunk and batter tha front door claimin were lookin fer a brothel while you an tha girls sneak in tha back!"
Gregor takes a deep breath, and lets out a heavy sigh, "No. You are not the distraction. We need an outside party to cause the distraction. Ideally one that doesn't even realize that its purpose is to distract in the first place. Clearly, there is more focus on ensuring you all get drunk and bedded, than on what needs to be done. I'll leave you all to that. Get it out of your system tonight. Meanwhile, I will be gathering any information we may need for this operation. I intend on preparing to use a Hellknight distraction, while finding a hidden entrance. If any of that does not prove fruitful, we will look into disguised infiltration, as a Physician and Grey Maiden."
He stands, smooths his uniform, pushes in his chair, and leaves coin on the table to cover his filling a seat while not purchasing anything. "I bid you all a good night."
Mai returns from the Kitchen
and notices Gregor is gone
"I'm guessing, you guys were focused on other things then the job and some of the problems.
And I just came up with a way to deal with getting the grey maiden armour.
And it's a simple answer; magic.
more specifically that disguise magic or shape change magic."
"Pretty and clever! But where do you plan on finding this magic? Most of the casters in town would sell you out for a copper, let alone if one of these Gray Maidens come knocking on their door."
"I was hoping someone within our group could cast it.
Or we'd need to go out of town to find someone who would."
"The best one of course would be a Hat of disguise.
or enchanting my armour to look like a grey maiden's armour on command."
"Though there is another option should we not be able to find those.
We'd go with Gregor's idea, but add in two cursed girdles."
"Sounds like I should hang back a bit an come in hard an fast if tha mission goes bad."
"Maybe Crain, Drakus an I should be waitin in tha alleyway in case yer stealthy mission goes awry."
When Gregor leaves the others to finish their mindless revelry, he sets about in trying to learn what he can. He uses his time and connection with the community to try and ferret out answers to some of the questions that existed when he left the bar.
1. The hellknights prefer to roam the city looking for trouble and deal with it on the spot. If someone attacked a hellknight they would consider seeking retribution but they don't ordinary pursue ordinary lawbreakers unless they have committed lots of crimes or very severe one. The only criminal they are actively hoping to arrest currently is Blackjack a local hero of sorts but seen as a force of chaos and a lawbreaker by the hellknights.
2. It seems very unlikely. All the Grey maidens have a similar build and they are all rather slim.
3. The building is one of the House Arkona Imports warehouses on West Dock that was purchased nearly four months ago and remodeled. It is said it was once a smuggler's den. However any secrets it might have would only be known to the nobles of house Arkona.
1. Hat of disguise (up to 3 of them at 2000 gold each)
2. Potions of disguise or alter self yes as many as you need (50 gold each for disguise) (400 for alter)
3. Adding glamour to armor (yes will cost 3000 gold and take 3 days)
*on a +1 armor
4. Girdle of gender swap. Yes one for 8000 gold. (permanent until remove curse is cast. Can only be used once per person.)
Pai replies to the group at the bar
"If we go the magic route, it's easy enough.
It'll change in cost pending on the method we take.
With some being a nice short-term use, others good now and later."
"You know, I think Mr. Gregor could fit in a suit of the Gray Maiden armor much better. More of a feminine build."
"He does have the stature to pass as a grey maiden, I agree.
But certain things would give him away as a man."
These are typical grey maidens in armor. Most seem about the same build with very few curves. When selecting grey maidens they go for small athletic women who are very beautiful and then they break them mentally and they scar their faces as part of the training.
"It's be a problem for me you use real Grey Maiden armour, since most are a foot shorter than me, and with less curves."
"So I would like your feedback onto which method we should take:
Magic items, Magic Potions, Illusion magic on my armour, or a cursed girdle."
"Let's just get you one of those magic hats so you can turn into whatever you want. Easy peasy, and we can get going on the job. The dwarf's eyes are going to be afloat with ale, if we wait around all day."
"Not so my lad, Iffen yer engineered with tha proper drainage."
Donagar points to the general area below his waist.....
"The hats are nice and re-usable.
And can be used to change appearance when needed.
So I do agree with the hats."
"So how yah lot gonna signal an let me know yer in troubles?"
I'm with Donagar.
Assuming you have the money you get a hat or two no problem.
Heading over there?
Donagar and Drakus find a good position outside where they can observe the windows of the (N, S, E, W) and watch for the signal/sign that the others are in trouble, or that everything is going well.......
Unless someone wants to set up a message spell among some of us, just not Gregor / Donagar!!!!!
"So we will take watch fer yer signal, I hope yah make it in an out likety-split"
"You too wait on me. I'd stand out like an auroch in a parade in there. I'm sure you two will enjoy the company!"