Samen's eyes fix on the caricatures, his jaw set and his face tense. His expression is clearly one of anger, though exactly what at is not clear.
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”What’s this? Valta, Lumi, and Jack? Has no one been paying attention to me in all this? Am I just flying under everyone’s nose, literally, on a giant bat, without anyone even noticing? I mean, no offense Jack, of course you deserve to be caricatured, and circled in red, sure, all well and good for you, nicely done, but not even one tiny stick figure of me? Not even just my face, smiling perhaps. It’s insulting. I am insulted, as if this whole ordeal hasn’t been enough.”
Gate closes his shirt across his patchy chest and crosses his arms.
You notice a gilded chest near where the floor breaks off into the plane of air. It wasn't there just a moment ago.
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The boy laughs and mimics Gate's puffery.
"Methinks, Gateau, you think this song was penned for you. But no, twas writ for me, you see?" He loosens the laces on his shirt, puffing out his skinny chest as he turns his thigh outward like a popinjay.
He sings up a spell, scanning the chest for magicks.
There is definitely magic inside, of several schools, but you can’t tell which.
With a little cantrip, he attempts to open the chest from afar.
There is a sealed letter inside and five items, It doesn’t seem like the chest is trapped or anything insidious.
Samen cautiously approaches the chest and prods it with his sword. Assuming nothing unusual happens, he reaches down and picks up the letter.
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Samen sees that the chest contains a note. There are four items inside, along with a wand of Identify: a wickedly sharp cold iron punching dagger, a death mask, a crimson hip scarf, and a colorless silken cloak.
Dearest Guests of Ilmoitse he Enlightener,
It is wise of you to be cautious, but Ilmoitse the Enlightener would never place a mimic in the path of his esteemed guests!
Ilmoitse thanks you for the completion of your small task! The Belkers have been dispatched. Here is your reward, as promised — after all, is not Ilmoitse known throughout the multiverse for his generosity to his friends? He is. You will soon know this is true, for the value of these gifts far outweigh the difficulty of the task you have accomplished. Even Gate has not been forgotten (though he has pained Ilmoitse with his undue criticisms of his most gracious host).
Ilmoitse would be pleased that you use these trinkets from his treasury in your Quest to save Lumi — be rest assured that should you die or misplace these trinkets, they will return to my treasury instantly! Thus, Ilmoitse assures you that even should you fail in your mission and die screaming, Ilmoitse's little treasures will return home to glimmer and gleam on a shelf in his vault forevermore. They will glisten like stars in the firmament, to be admired by his guests for ages to come. Therefore, you may die with a sliver of happiness in your heart, and remember Ilmoitse.
In The Name Of Sultan Zafer Xxxviii, The Lord Of The Heavens And All The Stars Of The Mortal Void, And His Most Humble Servant, Ilmoitse The Enlightener, May The Wheel Of The Heavens Turn In The Firmament To Ever Smile Upon Your Quest!
"Well then, nothing to be worried about, huh? Jack, can you tell us about these treasures?"
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The wand has exactly 4 charges; the boy can identify each item using it and glean some of each unique item's history.
Dowager-Countess Hesperance, Intelligent +1 Cold Iron Punching Dagger
Aura moderate divination
Alignment Chaotic Good
Senses 60 ft., vision and hearing
Intelligence 10, Wisdom 8, Charisma 16; Ego 12
Skills Sense Motive +11 Languages telepathy, (Common [Klavek])
Dowager-Countess Hesperance was a legendary old gossip who graced the courts of Morsain with her entourage of courtiers who delighted in gossip. The Dowager-Countess had a stern side, however, and demanded that all those in the court act with complete and utter propriety in public. This was perhaps a way to obfuscate her vice for gossip. In the afternoons, she and her coterie loved nothing more than to sip delicate cups of black tea over little cakes, sharing the day's juiciest gossip.
Once per day, Hesperance can summon her ghostly entourage of 1d4+2 attractive socialites. These illusions cluster closely around Hesperance's bearer, constantly laughing at his jokes, stroking his ego, and fawning with flattery.
Hesperance sees Gate and admonishes him: YOUNG MAN — BUTTON THAT SHIRT! SCANDALOUS!
Every day, or upon picking her up, the bearer must make a DC 12 will saving throw or be forced to dress with utterly conservative propriety, following the antiquated fashions of a previous generation. Further, at some point that day, they must host a fancy tea party for all their friends and trade only the juiciest gossip.
This is the Death Mask of King Phinneas Ffynne the Inscrutable.
Phinneas Ffynne was a powerful Klavakian king who was brought down by a years-long Ragamuffin operation. First, his embarrassing fetishes were revealed and he was ridiculed by the general populace; next, his illicit opium use came to the fore and he was disowned by his mother; after that, his gambling habits were unfurled his daughters disowned him; finally, his embezzlement from the Klavakian tax vault was disclosed and he was hung in ignominy.
Splattered with rotting fruit and various offal, he died on the gallows — but ultimately, Phinneas thwarted the Ragamuffin agents who plotted his demise. Phinneas had the last laugh: legend has it that he maintained a cool aplomb through each stage of his disgrace, never giving his tormenters the one thing they wanted most: a sense of shame, a look of terror, or impotent rage at his fall from grace.
Even as he walked up the gallows — even as his neck snapped in the noose — Phinneas's face remained perfectly deadpan. The ragamuffin agents in the crowd were heard to scream with frustration — the one time in all of history the organization's agents lost their cool in public.
To this day, the colloquialism "I'm Ffynne as Phinneas" means that you're having a wretched day, but bearing it with quiet perseverance nonetheless.
This death mask was created shortly after the King's final moments, and shows a perfectly impassive face. It's almost smiling beatifically, but you can't be quite certain.
It functions as a Mask of Stony Demeanor, but against Klavakian royalty and gentry, the bonus to feint in combat increases to +10.
The scarf was once used by a king's favorite; he danced for the king and his court but always had eyes for another. This love was never fulfilled, and over the years the dancer poured all of his exquisite grief and longing into his art, until one day the scarf took on a sad life of its own.
The dancer died centuries ago, but his heart beats on — forever yearning — whenever the scarf is used in a sorrowful performance.
Not only is this useful as a piece to move cold hearts, but the scarf is harmful to one's foes. Once per day as a standard action, a bard or dancer can make a perform check to impart a fraction of the dancer's desire. All shaken or demoralized enemies within thirty feet must make a will save or catch on spiritual fire with the pain of longing, taking 1d10 damage. They must then make another save or the memory lingers, doing another 1d4 damage per round.
As a full-round action, you can change the color and length of the cape to match your mood or attire.
When using the derring-do 1st-level swashbuckler deed, the wearer adds an additional die when rolling either a natural 5 or 6 rather than just a natural 6.
Additionally, the cape grants a +2 resistance bonus on saving throws. This bonus increases to +4 for 1 round each time the wearer uses the charmed life swashbuckler class feature.
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"I must confess, to call me Jack seems wrong. Would you perhaps employ my former given name? I'll go by Birne, if you please." The boy known as Jack and Birne and something else picks up the wand and taps it on his brow.
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"Oh goody gosh, a scarf to set my lovers' (and my haters') hearts afire!" Abandoning his jaded barbs for a moment, the boy throws the scarf around his neck like a boa.
"Well met, milady Hesperance. Here stands your fated match, Gateau!'
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"Of course, dear Birne" Samen says, picking up the mask. "I shall confess, however, that the sound of it is still odd to my ears. Until quite recently, you understand," he says, placing the mask over his face, "I had not expected ever to hear it again."
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Gate picks up the up the punching dagger, smiling.
What’s that you said? Button my shirt? I’m being scandalous am I? Me, really? Finally someone has noticed.
Well! I Scandalized, Hesperance huffs and puffs but soon simmers down, cowed by Gate's strong will (for today…)
A few minutes later, she whispers to Gate: Whose the strange little boy? Why does he speak so, calling you "Gateau"? In my day, little ones knew their place! No one would dare give an adult a familiar nickname! This new generation, they don't understand discipline like we did — a good spanking — that's what's needed, I tell you. They respect you for it, they do, when all's said and done, even if you have to bend them over your knee time to time. Well, I'm sure you will tell me all about this strange Birne — we have lots of time to talk, you and I. And where are my old friends, the lovely courtiers of the castle? We absolutely must travel in appropriate style, with our entourage — it wouldn't do to be seen alone with riffraff such as those. (You feel, somehow, she is gesturing at the rest of your party when she says the word "those")
Samen spots a well-hidden vertical ladder along the Northern wall. It descends through the empty air almost a hundred feet.
Samen leads the way. When his feet touch the rung of the halfway point, the ladder suddenly teleports! You find yourselves hanging above the void, with the latter connected to a new room above. Far below you can see the other half of the latter.
You hold on tight and climb upwards again, knowing that getting lost here in the plane of air might mean you are lost forever…
You make it to the top of the ladder, and hear a screaming wind. Your hair and clothing whip about, as being pulled into a vortex.
This chamber is at 60 feet long and contains a cyclone laid on its side. If you move forward from the wall at all, you will be sucked insode and flung to the far side of the chamber. Luckily, the far side looks clear of debris or traps, and safe. There is a break in the wall near top of the whirlwind.
Samen spots a switch along the wall.
Birne the boy, he sings. Of sailors miraculously saved from a storm by nixies. Of caravans who found the oasis to be much closer than imagined.
"Wait! Wait. Something seems off here. Look, look where the whirlwind is funneling to. Do we really want to go where it's trying to send us?"
"Let me take a look at this switch, first." Samen slides carefully along the wall to the switch and looks it over. He examines it carefully for traps, then pulls it.
The switch looks safe — Samen pulls it and the whirlwind dies down. The room is still.
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Klaytal twirls the cape, then loosely ties it across his shoulders. It lengthens and takes on a beautiful shade of aubergine.
"Thank you very much, kind and masterful Ilmoitse the Enlightened, o' gracious host! It was a pleasure to help in our small way. I sure miss that guy's dates, they were pretty good."
As Klaytal looks over the yawning chasm, he peers closely to look for traps.
Shrugging, suggests, "I think BIrne's correct, let's hit it." and teleports to the other side.
The exit to the room opens out into the empty air. Hundreds of feet below, you can barely see a structure floating in the void — possibly another room. Far above, nothing but clear air.
There is a placard next to the exit.
Take a leap to show your faith:
Falling, whisper Zephyr's name.
Summer wings will land you safe.
"If you should whisper 'Tuulenvire', the breeze will guide you down. Or maybe bluster if you’ve air that’s hot within your mouth." Birne gives a sly smirk toward Gate before he leaps, whispering the name.
Gate leans out and watches the boy fall… Hesperance snorts derisively. Then the Boy slows, slowly coming to a stop and hanging midair.
Then he begins to ascend, picling up speed until he whizzes past the door he just jumped out of, gaining speed steadily as he ascends. He sees a bubble-like ceiling approaching… fast.
Samen waits for Klaytal and Gate. "Go ahead, I'll bring up the rear."
Klaytal and Gate jump!
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You slam into the ceiling at high speed and burst through; it feels like moving through a soap bubble.
You find yourselves in the town of Morsain. You have made it out of the dungeon alive!
Samen isn't with you. What do you want to do? Wait for him? Go to the castle?
”Oh, this place. So, we’re back safe and sound then are we? Wait, where’s Samen? Did he not jump?”
The boy leans against the wall. "He’ll come. He often takes his time to make a leap. And if it wasn’t so, he’d be a boy like me right now, if not a teddy bear."
He taps his toe. And taps. And taps...
”He’s still not here? I don’t know about you, Birne, but I’m starting to get concerned. Samen should have arrived by now, I would have thought. Klaytal is another matter, I’m never sure where he is. But Samen is the punctual sort, is he not?”
"You know the man called Samen just as well as I. The boy was one to look (and look, and look some more) before he leapt. That said, the lad I knew would not have traveled through that maze — not once, nor twice or more, as has the man. Let's wait before we press this lovely inn anon for drink and clues."
As you stand there chatting, Klaytal and Birne see a shadow moving on a nearby the rooftop. There is a man there, aiming a light crossbow at Birne.
Suprise Round — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 3
Sniper 4
Klaytal
Birne
Sniper 2
Gate
He sees he's spotted and shouts There he is, boys! Suddenly three crossbow bolts fly at Birne from unexpected directions — two striking true witj deadly precision, and last other clattering against the sidewalk (you hear a vile curse).
Luckily, the last sniper misses wildly!
Suprise Round — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 3
Sniper 4
Klaytal
Birne
Sniper 2
Gate
The arrows find purchase, causing the boy to erupt in a contralto shriek. He disappears from mundane view.
Suprise Round — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 3
Sniper 4
Klaytal
Birne
Sniper 2
Gate
Sniper 2 sneers ("coward"!) and fires at Klaytal, the only person he has a clear line of sight to!
He hits the flat-footed swashbuckler!
Having been spotted, he 5-foot steps back.
The snipers duck back behind the roofs quickly, trying to hide again!
Birni easily sees sniper 3. He can't get line of sight to spot the other two, as they are on the rooftop directly over his head.
It's suspiciously quiet on the rooftops.
Round 1 — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 3
Sniper 4
Klaytal
Birne
Sniper 2
Gate
The boy blinks back into sight and cackles in blood foam laughter before disappearing again.
OUCH. That is sure unpleasant!!!!
Klaytal moves as close to the base of the building as possible, trying to move up the backside and climb up to the roof.
As the boy blinks into sight, #3's ready goes off and he presses the trigger on his crossbow!
The bloody foam sprays even more voraciously his mouth as the crossbow bolt slams into Birne.
The man finds the sight of the boy spewing blood so funny that he drops his crossbow and falls to the shingles, laughing hysterically!
----
Birne teleports into a room on the second floor of the inn — the room is somewhat well-appointed and empty here — except for the chamberpot boy who has one hand in a dresser drawer, and a lady's unmentionable in the other hand hand. He pulls a purse out and looks around before slowly beginning to close the drawer.
Round 1 — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 4
Sniper 3
Klaytal
Birne
Thief of Unmentionables
Sniper 2
Gate
Klaytal shouts in fear as he sees the blood spurt out of Birne, but his face hardens as Birne disappears.
”... these are the cowards! Hiding behind the roof, attacking a boy in broad daylight! Now where the heck IS Samen??”
Klaytal continues running up to the house, and will try to climb up when he can.
[ooc]His climb is +9, Doug if you could roll if/when appropriate I’d appreciate it!{/b]
Klaytal fast climbs up to the roof, going after the targets he can see!
He doesn't see the other two snipers lurking about.
Thge Sniper sees that Klaytal can easily climb the roofs — he tries to high-tail it out of there by jumping across the main thoroughfare!
Bemusedly, Klaytal watches the man fall out of sight. He hears hear a crash of splintering wood and a scream. A cloud of chicken feathers billows up into the air.
Moments later, a voice from the past cries out: Ye dern skeeterin chickin' theifs! Stay in the skies, where ye belongs!
Round 1 — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 4
Sniper 3
Klaytal
Birne
Thief of Unmentionables
Sniper 2
Gate
Gate vanishes, teleports to the roof top, and attempts to stab sniper 3 in the gut.
”Surprise!”
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Gate strikes true! Hesperance screams: YOUNG MAN! First you refuse to summon my entourage, then you shove me into the filthy rags — and intestines — of the commonalty! SCANDALOUS!
Snipers 1 and 4 take pot shots at Gate. Unfortunately he is within their extended sniping range. Their readies didnt go off so they take full advantage of their hiding place, full attacking using rapid reload and rapid shot.
Sniper 1:
Sniper 2:
Sniper 3 tries to shake off the laughter…
… but now that Gate is also spewing blood everywhere, he continues to laugh hysterically.
Round 2 — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 4
Sniper 3
Klaytal
Birne
Thief of Unmentionables
Sniper 2
Gate
Klaytal moves into flank with Gate.
The sniper passes out, still gasping with laughter.
Round 2 — bolded may act.
Sniper 1
Sniper 4
Sniper 3
Klaytal
Birne
Thief of Unmentionables
Sniper 2
Gate
The boy reappears and gives the little perve a pained wink. "‘Tis not my favored fancy, but I applaud your verve." He sings of a princely egg who, after being shattered in battle, was reassembled by his vassals.
"Have you an yen for gold, or favor from a royal prince?"
After taking such a large burst of damage Gate struggles to keep it together.
But he succeeds!
GM Dennis
