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Corrupt the Wish

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3,651 to 3,685 of 3,685 << first < prev | 64 | 65 | 66 | 67 | 68 | 69 | 70 | 71 | 72 | 73 | 74 | next > last >>

Granted! Well occasionally a horrified goat would escape.

I wish GoatToucher to have a rod that baleful polymorphs person to goat 3 times a day.

Yes but they are advanced giant goats with the devilbound template, and lust for blood.

I wish for the power to kill wizards with a snap of my fingers.

Granted, but when you kill them, they come back as mythic liches.

I wish that I had a better wish.

Wish granted! Thanks for giving me your wish! :)

I wish that wishes didn't screw people over all the time.

Wish granted, they now only screw people over most of the time.

I wish for more genies.

Granted. All the Genies are Efreeti and are welcome to show you their falchions.

I wish to be a Vampire immune to sunlight.

Wish granted, but you only get the immunity if you participate in a holy ritual that involves fully immersing yourself in running water for 5 rounds.

I wish to become a mythic vampire/mythic lich, who cannot be killed by anything.

Wish granted! You cannot be killed by anything, as you are already dead. However, a band of adventurers do destroy you and your phylactery not long into your unholy existence.

I wish that genies weren't so concerned with semantics.

Wish granted! They've decided not to grant wishes anymore.

I wish that I could wire my consciousnesses to the internet.

Confirmed. However your mind is hacked by doing so, and you spend the rest of your time as a vegetable.

I wish Paizo would put more easter eggs in their materials, the kind that are references, to be exact.

Granted your next order will be shipped with easter eggs as the packing material...

I wish everyone liked playing and DMing for kender.

Silver Crusade

Granted! Unfortunately, after hundreds of thousands of ruined friendships, all role playing is banned for the good of humanity.

I wish the "Homebrew Challenge" setting on the forums eventually becomes something publishable.

Wish granted! It ends up published by the same guys who made FATAL.

I wish that I had some awesome theme music.

Wish granted! You're theme music plays constantly, at all times, and nothing can stop it. It starts out quiet, but it just gets louder and louder and louder over time. You go insane from the constant noise that only you can hear, and finally, you go deaf. But that doesn't stop it. You can still hear the music, forever.

I wish that I was a magical unicorn.

Wish granted. However due to translation error, you are a single cob of corn that can cast prestidigitation 1/day.

I wish for UNLIMITED POWER!!! with no negative consequences.

Congratulations, you have unlimited power over the color of ketchup.

I wish for Limited Power, with all of the negative consequences.

Wish Granted! But I'm afraid not much has changed...

I wish I could see the far-reaching consequences of my actions.

Granted. Thoes strangers who keep pointing and laughing at you are time travelers from the future.

I wish to be able to buy the final season of Gravity Falls on DVD.

Wish granted! You are able to buy the final season of Gravity Falls on DVD. It is also the only thing that people will ever sell you now, even in places like the Grocery Store or concession stands.

I wish that evil outsiders would just stay on their planes of existence and never come to or interact with the material plane, both directly and indirectly.

Wish granted! All mortal life is now in Hell, Abaddon, and the Abyss. Now the outsides don't have to interact with the material plane at all.

I wish I could make the perfect wish.

Granted. Sadly, you only got the one, so...

I wish I was a beautiful princess!

Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Deluxe Comics Subscriber; Pathfinder Legends Subscriber

Granted. Unfortunately, all of your subjects are ogrekin and they all want to get to know you better.

I wish that my car was KITT from Knight Rider.

Wish granted. You are later killed by KITT's windshield wipers which, as everyone knows, are the most evil windshield wipers of all time! (It was a plot point that didn't come up on the show much).

I wish for a freshly killed thread to animate.

Wish granted! You manage to find a piece of living string, and kill it. You animate it, but something goes wrong, and the undead thread rips you limb from limb.

I wish that everything in this post rhymed.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Wish granted!

AwesomelyEpic wrote:

You manage to find a piece of living string,

And slay the unmoving wretched thing.

But the spell then goes horribly awry,
And you are torn from toe to eye!

And now what's left can fit in a petri dish,
However, I still did grant your wish.

As for my next wish, now keep this in mind:
I wish that everything in this post rhymed.

I wish to listen to epic poetry for the next hour.

Wish Granted.

I wish to be forgiven for posting in a matter that doesn't obey the OPs format if it's very worthwhile.
(There is a topic about artifacts that is being strangled by the OPs restrictions)

Scarab Sages

Paizo Superscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Comics Subscriber; Pathfinder Legends Subscriber; Pathfinder Tales Subscriber

Wish granted. You are forgiven after confessing to the Spanish Inquisition, just before your execution.

I wish for the Paizo Inquisition.

Not sure what to do with that: I suppose I didn't expect the Paizo Inquisition, so give me a sec...

Wish Granted. BTW, the actions of the Paizo Inquisition in an alternate timeline caused a massive flame war to the shunted to ours after it was "deleted." Long story short: all threads are locked, the riots have begun, and alas the ancient ways of the table top rpg are no more, lost to the ravages of time and marauding forum trolls.

I wish that peace and harmony would fall upon the land.

No one expects the Paizo Inquisition.

Wish Granted. The giant asteroids, Peace and Harmony, fall on the earth and create a new ice age that lasts for 2000 years.

I wish I were more evil than I already am.

1 person marked this as a favorite.

Wish granted! You have a monocle permanently affixed to one of your eyes that you can't ever remove, and grow a mustache that you must compulsively twirl at all hours.

I wish that it was possible to divide by 0.

Wish granted! The answer is Nyarlotep is summoned and tries to kill you.

I wish Comcast would unblock at least some of the channels.

Granted! You now receive GBC: GoatToucher's Boudoir Channel. It plays 24/7 at full volume, the set does not turn off, and you aren't allowed to leave.

Or look away.

Or close your eyes.

I wish someone would join me in my boudoir. I don't feel like going out to retrieve a new friend.

Paizo Charter Superscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Deluxe Comics Subscriber; Pathfinder Legends Subscriber

Granted. However, as this is an election year, all you get are lobbyists and politicians all trying to curry your favor. Just the mere thought of them joining you and ruining your fun causes you to run away in terror.

I wish the candy jar on my desk never runs out of candy.

Granted, but the candy inside tastes like rotten eggs, no matter if you refill the jar with something else.

I wish i could summon a tentacle monster to appear in the middle of Tokyo, and watch the chaos from a safe distance...the ever safe distance.

Wish granted! You summon a Tentacle Monster named Safe Distance, who promptly eats you. You have to watch the chaos from within it.

I wish that I had at my disposal a secret agency with a cool acronym.

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