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I'm in hell.
A lot of the coaches at smaller schools tend to send their tournament invites statewide so that other small schools, even if it's a drive, can get involved. Normally, this is fine. I tell the kids about the close ones and ignore the rest.
Today, however, has been a going on 3-hour back-and-forth argument in reply-all about a joke one of the coaches made. It's like watching a couple confront each other about the dating app still on one of their phones, but they've locked all the doors so you can't escape.
I'm not even going to the tournament. I don't need to know. Aaaaaaaaaaah
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*fantasy I often have*
"Hi, I'm Quibblemuch."
"Hi, nice to meet you."
"So... what do you do?"
"I'm the guy who invented Reply All in email."
"SUCKER PUNCH!"
"Yeah, I get that a lot."
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*fantasy I often have*
"Hi, I'm Quibblemuch."
"Hi, nice to meet you."
"So... what do you do?"
"I'm the guy who invented Reply All in email."
"SUCKER PUNCH!"
"Yeah, I get that a lot."
It's well known among gremlins that Reply All was an incredibly subtle yet powerful invention by a particularly creative and forward thinking gremlin. It is sublime!
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ALIEN: You idiot! Take off Reply All.
OTHER ALIEN: S#&*! My bad, sorry.
*47 years of SETI silence and counting*
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I recall reading some years ago about an observatory that began receiving irregularly timed signals that lasted from one to five minutes at a time. They were in the microwave end of the frequency, and that's what led them to find out it was the actual microwave oven in the breakroom.
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"E...T... defrost... burrito..."
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Fantasy Monster: Gallows-wight
Hang them high!
Fantasy Monster: Gallows-wight
Hang them high!
To paraphrase Alice Cooper, "I love the undead".
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Fantasy NPC: Honorable Belzaine, The Pale Squire.
Not-a-vampire.
Fantasy NPC: Honorable Belzaine, The Pale Squire.
Not-a-vampire.
Amazing!
Fantasy NPC: Livya Arna, Failed Golddigger
Her prospects for marrying rich aren't particularly good right now...
Fantasy NPC: Livya Arna, Failed Golddigger
Her prospects for marrying rich aren't particularly good right now...
Neither are mine, but I'm sure the reasons are different LOL
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Student's research paper: "Marie Antoinette lived at the same time as the French Revolution."
"This is an understatement."
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Student's research paper: "Marie Antoinette lived at the same time as the French Revolution."
"This is an understatement."
I remember that episode of Out of Sight, Out of Mind! Helen Keller distracted Robespierre with her wiles, allowing Frankenstein's monster to punch his way to the guillotine and rescue Marie Antoinette. They then all traveled through time to 2010s NYC, where Marie opened a bakery with Mary, Queen of Scots. I think they were trying a back-door pilot for an odd-couple style spin-off called Mary, Marie, Quite Contrary, but the network didn't pick it up.
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I told my wife about that last post and she just shook her head and said: "This is why you don't watch TV and want to cancel all the streaming services."
She's not wrong.
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I told my wife about that last post and she just shook her head and said: "This is why you don't watch TV and want to cancel all the streaming services."
She's not wrong.
If I was a producer, I would totally make those shows.
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It's a little like this.
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Every time I tell Orthos about the random kid quotes like that, they just short-circuit for a minute and shake their head.
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Oh yeah, Orthos! They haven't posted in over a year. Hope they're doing well!
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I don't know what the Venn diagram here is on people who love Iron Maiden AND Blackadder, but I found this video this morning and it brings me joy.
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I don't know what the Venn diagram here is on people who love Iron Maiden AND Blackadder, but I found this video this morning and it brings me joy.
I cannot express how glad I am you shared this LOL
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A swarm of corpse-fed earthworms.
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"Remember, kids: if they ever go with a Gatsby theme for prom, you need to stand awkwardly in the rain, buy way too many flowers, and present your date with a scrapbook of at least a year's worth of their social media posts."
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"Remember, kids: if they ever go with a Gatsby theme for prom, you need to stand awkwardly in the rain, buy way too many flowers, and present your date with a scrapbook of at least a year's worth of their social media posts."
"And when you inevitably commit vehicular manslaughter on your way to the afterparty, make sure your date takes the blame."
Oh, they haven't gotten to that chapter yet.
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What chapter? That was just sound life advice I give to all youths...
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A construct made of force fields and dedication to hunting ghosts.
A construct made of force fields and dedication to hunting ghosts.
I love this. One of the most original concepts I've ever seen!
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A construct made of force fields and dedication to hunting ghosts.
Who you gonna call?
GHOST CUBE!
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So we’re about to fight this cultist of a horrific qlippoth lord.
MY CLERIC: She will pay for whoring after strange gods!
OTHER PLAYERS: Uhhh… Strange gods? You worship Yog-Sothoth.
ME: Yeah, but I don’t get paid and we haven’t gone all the way.
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Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
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Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
Thank you. I'm definitely putting it in my annual review. :)
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Fantasy NPC: Ragged Plantmann.
Do you have spare old clothing or at least some rags?
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I love this! To me, animated clothing, or hair (eesh) gives me the willies like nothing else.
I think it was in AD&D 2e, but there was a monster called a Ragamuffin. It was just clothing, arranged in the pattern like it was being worn, that moved in unpredictable jerking and leaping motions as if it were whipped around in the wind. That thing gave me nightmares. I loved it.
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There was a 3e version, I think maybe with a y? (Ragamuffyn, that is.) I think in the Monster Manual 2 from then.
If that sort of thing tickles your fancy, for horror, I take it you might hold some of M.R. James' ghost stories dear?
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There was a 3e version, I think maybe with a y? (Ragamuffyn, that is.) I think in the Monster Manual 2 from then.
If that sort of thing tickles your fancy, for horror, I take it you might hold some of M.R. James' ghost stories dear? ** spoiler omitted **
Thank you very much!!
I scurried over to my shelf and sure enough, 3.5's MMII has the Raggamofyn. Creepy as ever!
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So now when I walk around, I can think: Oh, no. My clothes are moving. And my skeleton.
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She was cursed to never enjoy sunlit gardens.
I really like this one!
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Sometimes you will siege a tower, sometimes a tower will siege you.
The Tower of Power!!!
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Welp, I'm jumping back behind the GM screen tonight. The guy who was GMing is leaving town, so I'm stepping in to the Return of the Runelords campaign. Gotta say, now that I've read it, I'm pretty disappointed I didn't get to keep playing--I was playing a loonie Elder Mythos cultist cleric of Tawil at Umr, and now that I know what's going on, there would've been sooooo many chances for her to shine. Oh well. I'm retiring her as an NPC, who may have to show up at strategic points to bail the party out, before forgetting why she is there and wandering off (which, honestly, is not so different from how I ran her as a regular PC).
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Well, dang it. I hate that you had to give up being a player!
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It's alright. I made a player wrestle a greased pig, so... achievement unlocked!
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To prep for wrestling the pig, the PC took a strength mutagen AND a potion of bull's strength.
ME: Ooo... I'm pretty sure the Greased Pig Anti-Doping Commission isn't gonna like that...
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Isn't greasing the pig a kind of doping, in a way?
Isn't greasing the pig a kind of doping, in a way?
For the pig, sure! But I'm pretty sure they weren't expecting a 'roided up half-orc to jump into the pig-wrangling ring and... if you'll pardon the expression... go ham on everyone.
Still, he impressed the 10,000 year old wizard he was trying to impress, so I guess a win is a win.
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and... if you'll pardon the expression...
I will not.
Paizo.com is now blocked by my work. :(
No more breaks talking about PF and PF-adjacent topics that last much longer than I intend....
Paizo.com is now blocked by my work. :(
No more breaks talking about PF and PF-adjacent topics that last much longer than I intend....
There is literally only one appropriate response.