The Haiku Game

[Sliska Zafir]

Now just fancy that,

Multi-colored contraption,

Invented by slime.

[Ventnor]

Invented by slime?
That explains the stickiness
Unusable bed

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Unusable bed
Flaming steel wool, bad sewing
My crazy father

True story.

[Sliska Zafir]

My crazy father

Did not think himself crazy

Just solipsistic.

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Just solipsistic
Cogito, Ergo Sum - that's
The one thing I know

[Ventnor]

The one thing I know
Is bed and breakfast - I guess
That’s really two things

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

That’s really two Things
They do the dirty work of
The Cat In The Hat

[Ventnor]

The Cat in the Hat
Had a big spat with the Rat
Over a blue mat

[Sliska Zafir]

Over a blue mat,

Wrestlers were compromised,

Surprise! Full Nelson!

[Sissyl]

Surprise! Full nelson!

Didn't expect that, didya,

Ellen Ripley's cat?

[Sliska Zafir]

Alien mice are

More fun to chase than Earth ones

Eeeeeeee! there goes one now!

[Cuchulainn]

Ellen Ripley's cat
Who would be afraid of him?
Alien mice are!

Quote:

Alien mice are

More fun to chase than Earth ones

Eeeeeeee! there goes one now!

E, there goes 1 now,

The Sesame Street featured
characters have left!

[The Amazing Vanzetti]

Characters have left
The props have been put away
All the world's a stage

[Sliska Zafir]

All the world's a stage,

Performers and portrayers,

Inside gilded cage.

[Tvashtri Abdul-Khasis]

Inside gilded cage
Mercury bonds to sulfur
Eureka! Fusion!

[Ventnor]

"You reek-a, Fusion!"
Review of a new night club
1 star out of 4

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

1 star out of 4
Really a satellite, warn
Astrophysicists

[Sliska Zafir]

Ass trophy is a cyst;

Donkeys don't appreciate

A disease award.

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

A disease award
For lifetimes of achievement
The bubonic plague

[JTDIII]

The Bubonic Plague
I remember it quite well
HA! I started it

[Ventnor]

Hoteye started it
Because his parents gave him
A stupid first name

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

A stupid first name
Didn't stop Smedley Butler
War Is A Racket

[Sissyl]

War is a racket
someone really ought to tell
McEnroe and Borg

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Ensign Ro and Borg
One shanghaied Captain Picard
One shanghaied herself

[Cuchulainn]

One shanghaied herself
Is that what it's called these days?
Slang terms keep changing

[JTD]

Slang terms keep changing
Did you know "cheap" meant "to trade"?
Let's cheapen our goods

[Ventnor]

"Let's cheapen our goods
By making them overseas"
Outsourcing defined

[Sliska Zafir]

Outsourcing defined,

Cheaper over there than here,

Corporations suck.

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

"Corporations suck"
Mantra of my old high school
History teacher

[Sliska Zafir]

History teacher,

Manipulator of minds,

Revisionism!

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Revisionism
An epistemic crisis
Han Solo shot first

[Sissyl]

Han Solo shot first
When that happens, a man needs
antidepressants

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

antidepressants
"Prozac" "Buspar" "Seroquel"
Shakespeare characters?

[JTDV]

Shakespeare characters
Haphazardly played by some
Out of work actors

[Sliska Zafir]

Out of work actors,

McDonald's is hiring,

Taco Bell is too.

[Cuchulainn]

Taco Bell is too
Expensive?! Dude, you're that broke?!
Cancel your Netflix!

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Cancel your Netflix
Never return to Facebook
Vanish from the grid

[Cuchulainn]

Vanish from the Grid
Solar cells and rain water
Don't pay your taxes

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Don't pay your taxes!
The wealthy don't, why should you?
Paradise Papers

[Cuchulainn]

Pair o' dice, papers,
Mountain Dew and some Cheetos
It's Saturday Night!

[Ventnor]

"It's Saturday Night!"
The intro to a well-known
Television show

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Tell a vision, "show
Me what I most wish to see"?
Doesn't work that way

[JTDV]

Doesn't work that way
She said when I had finished
Wish you spoke before

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

Wish you spoke before
It will come back to haunt you
Deal with the devil

[Ventnor]

Deal with the devil:
I will give you my soul, and
You give me a rug

[Cuchulainn]

"You give me a rug
To tie the room together,"
The Dude requested

[JTDV]

The Dude requested
that we just quit quoting him
And enjoy world peace

[I'm Hiding In Your Closet]

"And enjoy world peace!"
President Bernie Sanders'
Fond farewell address

[JTDV]

Fond farewell address
Amityville horror house
was where we once lived

[Vick Tim]

Was where we once lived
Built on a toxic waste dump?
My third arm says “yes.”