Isn't freedom of movement nice?
*gently taps on Kae's shoulder*
Mr. jester. Sorry to interrupt you, but I must express my admiration for a man with the courage to promise naughty things to a woman with the power to officiate mass or even marry people instantly before the eyes of her goddess herself. A man who isn't afraid of commitment is rare these days, so many of them are afraid to "lose freedom and their friends and their identity and their hopes and dreams". Kudos to you.
Furthermore, I can get a hold of my head priestess afterwards, for what Shellyn joins remains together even in the afterlife, it will be so pretty.
Allow me to recommend you some schools in Absalom which would be just perfect for your soon-to-come children. Also I heard Jordan's family is in the clergy as well, you'll love such pious people.
*whispers to Jordan afterwards how she knows a divorce lawyer that can get you an alimony based on your ex-husband's character level*
Can't be intimidated by that. You threaten me with laws, tradition and authority. They mean nothing to me.
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ohh don't worry Kae-dear... but before you touch me we will have just to officiate a corresponding marriage is the least that ask Iomedae of her faithful... *sights whispering to Joanne: Worst i know a cleric of Asmodeus who might do all the legalise or just disband it in a whim... the woman is scary, and she don't care mcuh about caos.. she just chain chaotic people and lash at them*
*sights whispering to Joanne: Worst i know a cleric of Asmodeus who might do all the legalise or just disband it in a whim... the woman is scary, and she don't care mcuh about caos.. she just chain chaotic people and lash at them*
Bondaging chaotic people in particular? That's a weird fetish... but to each their own I guess...
Sleeps thens... Sleeps until tasty souls come by...
Your Friendly Neighborhood Dalesman
"Bringing Big D**n Justice to the Bad Guys Since 1369 DR"
THIS IS A PRESENT FOR ALL THE PERVS OUT THERE (LIKE DALESMAN :P)
*snif* That's the nicest gift I ever got. How thoughtful *is moved to tears*
THIS IS A PRESENT FOR ALL THE PERVS OUT THERE (LIKE DALESMAN :P)
Awww - thanks for watching out for me, Snorter! ;D
Your Friendly Neighborhood Dalesman
"Bringing Big D**n Justice to the Bad Guys Since 1369 DR"
There are tentacled aberrations and then there are tentacled aberrations...
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There are tentacled aberrations and then there are tentacled aberrations...
arg!!!!! my eyes! my eyes!!!
arg!!!!! my eyes! my eyes!!!
Sorry about that, Montalve. But on that note, it wouldn't be very Lovecraftian if there wasn't some poor victim out there getting mentally traumatized- or physically traumatized, as the case may be. ;)
Luckily for all of us, to paraphrase the infamous Elite GameMaster Doug Douglasson, the tentacled aberration in question subsists upon a constant diet of... tuna.
*takes his eyes as the good doctor (Sam Neil) in Event Horizon* Where I went there was no need for eyes...!! arg!!!!
Y'know, it just occurred to me- Paizo doesn't make their products for the visually impaired, do they?
That means I'll probably get a beat-down from the Paizo golem for reducing the Superscriber population by one less...
<waves a blown up subject picture of the recent "Takin it Easy" contest thread in front of Montalve> Erm, guess you won't be needing this enlarged picture of Merisiel and Kyra in the Katapesh indoor hot spring if you won't be putting your eyes back inside their eye-sockets? ;P
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*finish putting Montalve's eyes back with duck tape* there... ok it will take a few days for they to be well again, but the promises of seeing Merisiel in the bath again gave him hope for the future... gee...
well... from now on... as doctor's prescription he has been prohibited to open all this twisted links... for his own protection.
There are tentacled aberrations and then there are tentacled aberrations...Disturbing...
Heh, looks like someone made their save (will?) vs. wanting to tear their eyes out. ;)
On another note, while it isn't quite the yuletide season yet, how's about some Lovercraftian Mythos Xmas Cheer*?
* Not recommended for those with a proclivity for sight-abuse.
this a cruel and monstruous thing... I recomment to check this thread... it esplains everything.
Funny that you should be mentioning that thread. ;)
Now the way's I "sees" it, the rogue in question should've taken the "Emperor's" severed head, added some juvenile devilfish tentacles at the end of said head, and have it dance around a bit on a stick- maybe hire a starving Illusionist fresh from that Conjuration Academy to do a bit with prestidigation to color the head and tentacle pinkish... have an unseen servant or mage hand make it dance around (bonus points and coins if the Illusionist could get a ghost sound in Minkai about vegetable juice)...
Okay, it won't exactly prevent an alignment change or anything- but it probably might inspire Salvatore Scream to new artistic heights. And that Laori Vaus chick might appreciate it, I think. ;P
the tentacled aberration in question subsists upon a constant diet of... tuna
hey I am just here to cure the ones damaged by your naughty videos not to get an opinion on monstruous aberrations... still time to go before anevil clown noticesmy prescense...
*heads out as silentas a sherman tank*
Guess you'll not be around to duct tape any evil clown eyes back into any evil clown eyesockets then? ;)
Maybe I've gone too far with the tentacled abberation thing after all- heck, who need tentacles... except for aberrations and invertebrates?
How's about this then... can I's interest anyone in a quasi-romantic story then? Nothing too out of the ordinary- apart from there being no translations- just a nice clean tale of this fishmonger lady and the man who tries to woo her, only that she ends up suplexing him and chasing him away with a sharp implement (my guess would be a scaling-knife, she is a fishmonger, y'know). ;)
So, what'd I miss?
So, what'd I miss?
Lemme see... off the top of my head- tentacled aberrations, pink tentacles with white suckers, vegetable juice, eyes falling out (or was it torn out?), wood-gnomes being replaced by wood-dragonborn and wood tieflings (and wood-trolls starve as a result of this), tuna, octopus ink, Event Horizon, carol of the old ones, more tuna, more pink tentacles with white suckers, naked elven lasses in a bath-house in Katapesh, alignment changes, impressing Laori Vaus by attaching juvenile Devilfish tentacles to Pilt Swasel's head and making it dance around, evil clowns, a quasi-romance story with the fishmonger girl doing suplexes and chasing away her suitor with a scaling knife, and- Oh yeah- Sherman Tanks no longer being around to duct tape eyes back into eyesockets.
P.S. And did I mention even more pink tentacles and seafood?
This thread is made of win! (and tentacles)
I have returned, having previously wandered away. I think I forgot one of my toys here!
the tentacled aberration in question subsists upon a constant diet of... tunaNow with 100% different illustrations plus additional translation at no extra fee- and it's the same song too boot.
Amazing! And I thought my sanity, having been obliterated long ago, could not be damaged further. Someone invented negative numbers for the sanity score! Yay! Insane Power of the Old Ones!
I can now even see the voices! And smell. The one that tells me to cover myself in pasta innards and sing naughty songs in languages I do not understand has a unwholesome, nasty violet smell!
hey I am just here to cure the ones damaged by your naughty videos not to get an opinion on monstruous aberrations... still time to go before anevil clown noticesmy prescense...
Excuse me, miss! I'm in desperade need of curing. If you come closer I can whisper into your ear exactly what ails me!
*heads out as silentas a sherman tank*
Aaaaah, the tap-tapping of small feet in heavy combat boots!
There is no such thing as enough tentacles... ever ...
More tentacly goodness
We likes our tentacles- soft, squishy, or hard. We even likes our tentacles with a level or two of bard.
I don't think the evil clown needan duct tape on his eyes... and I am not ready to duct tape him where he really wants
So, does this mean there is a place on the evil clown that you wouldn't mind duct-taping? ;)
Amazing! And I thought my sanity, having been obliterated long ago, could not be damaged further. Someone invented negative numbers for the sanity score! Yay! Insane Power of the Old Ones!
I can now even see the voices! And smell. The one that tells me to cover myself in pasta innards and sing naughty songs in languages I do not understand has a unwholesome, nasty violet smell!
Y'know, I'm sorry to say that I couldn't find anything with pasta- so would you, um, settle for something with deep-fried octopus balls?
This thread is made of win! (and tentacles)
We likes our tentacles in ways we can't say. We likes our tentacles in a galaxy far, far away.
There is no such thing as enough tentacles... ever ...
Once you'd have tentacles, you're never the same. You'll get tentacles invading your video game.
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I don't think the evil clown needan duct tape on his eyes... and I am not ready to duct tape him where he really wantsSo, does this mean there is a place on the evil clown that you wouldn't mind duct-taping? ;)
of course!
his mouth and his wrist behinds his back, where they won't do any damage of course *smiles*
Aaaaah, sooooooooooooooooooooothing noises!
A galaxy far away? Distance has no meaning! Space is just time at a right angle, and they can be so patient.
Time is but a passageway. The beginning of the end - and end that never was.
We are forever! Eternal prisoners in time!
*sights deeply*
didn't the naughty videos crippled your mind already beyond repair?
Crippled? No. Altered, maybe. Twisted, warped, changed, shifted, awakened. Freed from the fetters of the silly notion you call "sanity", which clouds the mind from what is really there.
Those videos feed my mind. They just make me stronger. More. Eager. Good, good.
I don't think the evil clown needan duct tape on his eyes... and I am not ready to duct tape him where he really wantsSo, does this mean there is a place on the evil clown that you wouldn't mind duct-taping? ;)of course!
his mouth and his wrist behinds his back, where they won't do any damage of course *smiles*
I, I see we have a naughty girl. Duct tape, eh? I usually prefer velvet fetters, but we can play your way this time!
Brought enough for *all* my wrists?
You know, that's not a hat I'm wearing on the picture...
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I, I see we have a naughty girl. Duct tape, eh? I usually prefer velvet fetters, but we can play your way this time!
Brought enough for *all* my wrists?
You know, that's not a hat I'm wearing on the picture...
I, I see we have a naughty girl. Duct tape, eh? I usually prefer velvet fetters, but we can play your way this time!
err... and this was areferenceI wa trying to forget...
maybe I can find some unbreakable chains... maybe therewassomething leftafter Saranrae imprisioned Roguubeast... I knowits not that the name...but its a bad name to call in this situations...
damn ... no chains...
mmm let me see... I think that is my queue for exit...see you... or maybe not!!!
I, I see we have a naughty girl. Duct tape, eh? I usually prefer velvet fetters, but we can play your way this time!
Brought enough for *all* my wrists?
You know, that's not a hat I'm wearing on the picture...
I, I see we have a naughty girl. Duct tape, eh? I usually prefer velvet fetters, but we can play your way this time!
err... and this was areferenceI wa trying to forget...
maybe I can find some unbreakable chains... maybe therewassomething leftafter Saranrae imprisioned Roguubeast... I knowits not that the name...but its a bad name to call in this situations...
damn ... no chains...
mmm let me see... I think that is my queue for exit...see you... or maybe not!!!
I like it when they get all flustered.
Come one baby, I can show you the stars... and how right they are.
...and a Black Tentacles spell with the "Living Spell" template from Eberron.Consider this idea officially stolen.
You know, funny thing is, I used this idea already. Grappled a PC's Figurine lion to dead mini-land. That was fun.
Then a PC druid rhino'd it. Darn rhinos and their massive grapple bonuses!
There are tentacled aberrations and then there are tentacled aberrations...
As a public mis-service, I give to everyone some
replacement tentacled abberations.Now with 100% different illustrations plus additional translation at no extra fee- and it's the same song too boot.
As another public mis-service, here's areplacement, sans translations.
You'll have to have Ms. Fenix see to your eyes with duct-tape though, unless you're an evil clown- then you're on your own... but their might just be some twisted romance in the air though. ;)
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You'll have to have Ms. Fenix see to your eyes with duct-tape though, unless you're an evil clown- then you're on your own... but their might just be some twisted romance in the air though. ;)
*mumble grumble*
what are trying to imply sir? *playing with a mace against her hand... which interesting as its not her goddess chosen weapon*
You'll have to have Ms. Fenix see to your eyes with duct-tape though, unless you're an evil clown- then you're on your own...
Feeble human! That which destroys your soul only makes me stronger.
I'm not evil, though. The concepts of good and evil mean nothing to me. They just detract from the wonderful, complex, intricate net of things and happenings the short-sighted are wont to call "chaos" and consider random.
You're right about the romance, though. She totally wants me.
*playing with a mace against her hand... which interesting as its not her goddess chosen weapon*
More interesting is its curious shape.
You're right about the romance, though. She totally wants me.
*playing with a mace against her hand... which interesting as its not her goddess chosen weapon*More interesting is its curious shape.
*mumbles* now.. what is wrong with this?
Erm, hold on... *goes to grab some electrical tape* ... might not be duct-tape, but it'll have to do.
So, about that mace... off-hand, I'd say, from it's position, that it kinda hangs a bit to the stage-left. *ducks*
Ma'am, is there something about that chaotic/not-good clown that's somehow rubbed off on you that you're not tellin' the rest of us? ;)
*ducks again*
getting back to topic... tentacle-smurf!
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Erm, hold on... *goes to grab some electrical tape* ... might not be duct-tape, but it'll have to do.
So, about that mace... off-hand, I'd say, from it's position, that it kinda hangs a bit to the stage-left. *ducks*
Ma'am, is there something about that chaotic/not-good clown that's somehow rubbed off on you that you're not tellin' the rest of us? ;)
*ducks again*
*swings the mace as Here4daFreeSwag ducks once* oh yeah I forgot crappy rolls... *prays a bit and now the mace begans to shine with a silver halo and now sings again barely hitting the man*
ok... now for a moment I was forgetting why is soo good to be a cleric... now... sorry time for me to get medieval... but don't worry weare just makingjustice for pity and surrender go to a saranreist *hits again and again*
Honey, you're not playing around are you? I thought fidelity was a big thing with you lawful types...
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Due to the excessive turn of violence that this thread has taken, we now preempt this regularly scheduled thread to bring you this important announcement.
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Maury Povich voice over
"Great Cthluhu ... you are NOT the father of Baby Squidbat!"
She-demoness runs wailing from her chair, exiting stage left to collapse in a sobbing heap. Great Cthluhu starts devouring audience members that boo'd him. The camera man finally loses his last vestiges of sanity, devouring his toes after liberal application of steak sauce. Povich, a minion of Nyarlathotep, sits there grinning. Baby Squidbat slithers across the floor to consolate herself with the kneecaps of a security mook.