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Man! Patrick . . . you are a machine! Rock on!
I need to get a Word doc going of all of these items and just go through and write my comments for all of them and then post all at once. There are just so many!!! Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
Well, I want everyone else to comment on my item, so I feel I should comment on everyone elses.
I'm up to Page 6 now, so I'm catching up. Maybe...
Scrollcaster
There's the germ of a good idea in here... but I have a lot of problems with it along the way.
A one inch by one foot burnished steel tube capped by knobby ironwood plugs.
This is a fine description! Stop here!
The plugs mesh with the threading on the interior of the tube compressing an oiled-cord O-ring - an excellent watertight seal. The plugs are non-magical impromptu repairs.
Noooo.... there's no need for this, especially the last sentence.
Each end opens into a separate fifteen cubic foot extra-dimensional space. One end is restricted to written materials, the other — writing materials.
This is kind of clumsy. I'd specify the capacity by page count, and only allow pages to go in.
The tube exterior has a self-maintaining written inventory, separated by category: "Maps, Wizard Scrolls, Information...." Upon command, the named material is legibly displayed as desired. A scroll thus presented can be read for casting -- consuming the scroll.
This part is nice! You could perhaps be a bit more specific about what sort of action it is to 'load up' the scroll, but the default for commanding a magic item is okay.
All those fabrication powers... lose them.
Unique scrolls disappear sometime after insertion...
No, no, no... it's just a bad idea.
Prerequisites: Mostly they look alright, although you should specify how many ranks of a skill are required (but I'd drop them anyway along with the fabrication powers.)
I do like the underlying idea for this one -- prune away everything that detracts from it and I think you've got a good item.
Cheers,
Roger
Thanks for a quick reply, Dark, I'm glad to know I'm not the first DM to feel like backpacks are too easy to get into, and during a melee, no less. I think you are probably right about my item getting nixed because of the "swiss-army knife" factor, which I kind of think is unfair, because if I was going on an adventure, I'd probably want to include an actual swiss army knife!
DD
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Here's my entry. I welcome any feedback.
Strawman’s Mask
** spoiler omitted **
I like this, but it is tied into the real world a bit much. If the wearer turns into a raven and joins the congress, how is he spotted (that is, how is it only 75% concealment)? Also, if part of the swarm, can the user do anything but move with the swarm? If so, then concealment should drop significantly.
Caduca’s Chewy
This item is made of a rubbery substance in the shape of a small hive. The chewy is dropped on the ground within reach of a target with a bite attack. The target must then make a Will save DC 17 to resist the compulsion to bite the chewy. A successful save allows the target to ignore the chewy and act normally. A failed save forces the target to use its bite attack against the chewy until it is destroyed, the chewy has 20 hit points. The target must remain immobile and may do nothing else but bite the chewy until it is destroyed. If the target has multiple bite attacks then only one is pre-occupied and the other attacks may be directed as normal.
faint enchantment; CL 6th; craft wondrous item, suggestion, armour; Price 1,200 gp
Note:
** I just realized that this is not my final version. Not sure where I have hidden that. LMAO anyhow this is an almost complete draft.
I assume my item's name and light hearted theme was the problem.
My good friend Jess takes it upon herself to entertain Loki my border collie at our gaming nights. She uses one of his rubber chewy to occupy him. Her character is named Caduca and I dedicate this item to her.
I think its a useful tool when entering a beast's lair. But a word of warning bring many if its a hydra's lair!
Hope it makes some of you smile!
Thurburner Stone
Over the next 24 hours it will slowly shrink until it returns to its one inch size.
This is a weird and hard-to-arbitrate effect. I'd almost certainly house-rule this into an instantaneous change after 24 hours if I were using it in my game.
The whole next paragraph about what it can do and who use it, etc etc... I'd cut it. I don't think it adds anything.
I think it's too expensive for what it is and what it does.
What I might be inclined to go for is an oil that can coat regular sling stones and make them into Thurburners as a one-time effect.
Yeah, I could definitely see making some use of that...
Cheers,
Roger
RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16
,
Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8
aka FaxCelestis
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Hooray! I've gotten the text to my item. Here it is:
Earring of Larceny
Plus it does way too much for free (+2 competence bonus, silence, invisibility, knock, nondetection, AND it does not radiate magic or require verbal command words). Make all the spell effect cost charges and remove the mindreading part and you might bring it under control.
See, I thought that having everything be thematically linked would make it a cohesive, yet powerful, item.
Thurburner Stone
This item appears to be a smooth rock one inch in diameter that is slightly heavier than expected. When thrown or fired from a sling, the rock grows to five feet in diameter in flight, maintaining its initial velocity and target, doing 6d6 in damage, DC 15 Reflex save for half damage. Once it impacts its target, it behaves as any other five foot diameter boulder. Over the next 24 hours it will slowly shrink until it returns to its one inch size. It will then be ready to be used again.This stone can be used to block passages or as impromptu artillery, although five foot diameter boulders indoors damage wooden floors and, if above the first floor, are likely to fall through to lower floors, damaging whatever they fall on. Halflings are the primary makes of Thurburner Stones as defensive items, but do not use them often – five foot diameter boulders are ideal for (surviving) attackers to hide behind.
Faint transmutation; CL 6th; Craft Wondrous Item; shrink item; Price 36,000 gp.
Things I forgot in my submission:
1) The Reflex save. The damage for the rock is based on the catapult in the SRD and I forgot to add the save in my submission. D'oh! (I added it here.)2) The xp cost to make the item. I just saw that.
3) The spark the winners had. Magic item creation is my weak point and reading through the winners, I see the spark the judges were looking for.
Because you reviewed mine, here goes:
Is the cost not to high, 36000 gp is quite a lot of money? Given that this is basicly a one-shot item.
I wanted to suggest to make it truely one-shot, which would reduce the cost, but then it hit me. This feels too much like ammunition, not like a wondrous item.
The XP cost is optional I think, at least the SRD does not list them?
Hey, Clark Peterson! ...or anyone!
Bash my item, please!
Call me ugly. Question my parentage. Anything for some feedback.
Cracked Arcane Healing Amulet
This amulet transforms arcane energy into healing power, like a weak
and flawed version of a Cleric's Spontaneous Casting.
The alabaster amulet's design is a curled dragon devouring its tail. A
large crack down the middle gives it a frail appearance. Those healed
by this amulet describe the experience as cold and unpleasant, as
opposed to the warm euphoria of divine healing. Researchers theorize
that the meager healing output and ability damage side effect are due
to the abuse the amulet has sustained. It is currently undetermined
how powerful it was when originally created, and unflawed.
Reproductions of this item invariably exhibit the same damage pattern.
To activate the amulet, the arcane caster sacrifices a spell (maximum
spell level 5th) from his prepared spells or 'spells per day', then
channels that arcane energy into the amulet as a full round action,
and must willingly accept one point of ability damage to CON, and then
touch the target. The amulet heals the target 1d4 hp per level of
spell sacrificed. Arcane casters without CON scores cannot use the
amulet. Divine spells cannot be sacrificed.
Moderate necromancy; CL 5th; Craft Wondrous Item, vampiric touch;
Price 8,000 gp.
self-criticism
I worry that "arcane magic should not be able to heal (at low level)" was a rule I broke with this item, and shouldn't have. Maybe the built in penalty wasn't high enough, or was too high?
Maybe it just wasn't useful enough. It sure could help prevent a TPK under the right circumstances, but might not be used every day.
The idea was that the item may have once been an artifact, was broken, but still has some use as a wondrous object in its broken form. Wizards could copy its composition, and try to achieve its original powers, but without the skill to create an actual artifact, the copies would turn out broken as well.
This item could be discovered relatively early in a campaign, and eventually restoring it to working...
Actually, I thought you were tough but fair with the previous critique. I know that some people might take offense, but I believe that the majority of us are grown up enough to handle it.
I'm all for the idea of having the individual item threads emailed out to their submitters, which would be a ton less work than manually commenting on each one.
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Diviner’s Chalk
I guess I wasn't the only one to do something with chalk:
Summoner’s Chalk
Often found in pouches, a typical set of Summoner’s Chalk contains fifty pieces of this chalk embedded with powdered silver. On command, a piece of chalk will fly out and inscribe a Magic Circle against Evil (either version) as per the spell except with a range of 30 feet. If using the second version of Magic Circle, a second command on a later round will add a special diagram to the circle (as per the Magic Circle description, but taking only 1 minute). Once complete, the special diagram creates a Dimensional Anchor effect on any creature summoned into the circle.
The Magic Circle and Dimensional Anchor effects consume one piece of chalk each.
Variations of this item exist that create Magic Circles against Good, Law, or Chaos.
Moderate Abjuration; CL 7th; Craft Wondrous Items, magic circle against evil, dimensional anchor; Price: 15,000 gp.
My inspiration was a trio of magic circles in the 1E DMG. I guess it's pretty pedestrian, but I like the image of wizards summoning demons inside magic circles, so I wanted something to make that easier. Also, as Wands of Magic Circle aren't a standard item, I figured this might be useful out in the dungeon as well. I priced it close to a 3rd level wand since the Dimensional Anchor aspect basically requires two charges.
Clark: if you decide you want to kick anyone else in the berries, feel free to make an example out of me, but I think everyone here should really take the point that sometimes it's better not to know.I can handle the truth as well. Bring it on Clark.
If you are going to do it: Goblin Gruel is mine.
Here's mine. I had to cut out quite a bit of it.
Scapular of the Heroic Slayer:
Cool item. I'd have gone with one or the other effects, not both in a single item. And the second use is better. I could see undead hunting groups creating these to avoid becoming the enemy if they die.
The second use is better, but in flavor only, since it only works once your character is dead. Game-wise, granting uncanny dodge and improved uncanny dodge against undead would see more use. And yeah, undead hunting groups would really want these items. If I had more words, I'd even make a gestalt effect for a Periapt/Scapular set.
Hey, Clark! Since you're offering your thoughts, I wouldn't mind you sharing some of your opinions on my item (Scapular of the Heroic Slayer).
I was fired up and probably submitted to early in the contest over word count with a simple slightly munchkinny utility item mainly hoping to see the Bracer of Summoning in print one day in some Paizo product as a useful utility item. Had fun entering the contest and learned a few simple valuable lessons if there is a contest next year.
Bracer of Summoning
This metal bracer is engraved with eldritch runes of power...
[snip]
Other Considerations
Once you have a final cost figure, reduce that number if either of the following conditions applies:[snip]
Mike,
There is nothing inherenty wrong with your ITEM. It was simple and mechanically sound. In our view it didnt stand out. What killed you, though, was your SUBMISSION NOT YOUR ITEM, if that makes sense. You probably know that by now.
We wanted a 200 word item and what we got was a huge book report.
Remember, you are submitting to industry guys who have dealt with freelancers before. Unfortunately, your submission gave us all horrid flashbacks of nightmare freelancers. Here was a part of my comments:
Clark said:
WTF? I think we all know this guy: The freelancer you asked to give you a 32 page module who gives you 180 pages of stuff with lots of notes and all the art notes and maybe some hand drawn maps of what the art should look like and trying to do everyone's job and is a total pain to work with. This was a 200 word wondrous item assignment. We got a book report. Reject
Actually, I'm not rejecting it to make Mona read it. He he! (and as a small aside, his open game license is all jacked up)
[Erik then read it, was pissed I made him read it and rejected it]
I'm glad you had fun with the contest. And I hope this process was instructional and will help you in the future.
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Well, after I just poked fun at the arquebus of pillows, figure I should put mine up here.
Scroll case of Armaxis
If I read this right, this makes all scrolls placed in the tube doubleshot and there is not limit to the number of scrolls that can be placed inside. This could get very abusive.
I'd drop the re-use power and set a limit to the number of scrolls that can be placed in the tube or perhaps the number of levels of spells that can be used.
I guess several of us had cephalopods on the brain...
Cuttlefish Clasp
(too much backstory is one fault)
Possibly also too busy. I like it though and would use it in my game. In fact, I think I will...
<_<
>_>
Thanks on both counts.
For what it's worth, here's mine:
Darklantern
This item appears to be a somewhat soot-stained hooded lantern. When it is lit, the lantern gives off a brief burst of darkness in a 10-foot radius, then burns with a steady black flame that sheds no visible light. It does, however, provide magical illumination for all creatures that were within 10 feet of the darklantern when it was lit, equivalent to that of an ordinary hooded lantern (bright illumination to 30 feet, shadowy to 60 feet). This effect lasts for those creatures so long as the lantern remains lit. Other creatures cannot perceive the magical illumination at all, making the darklantern suitable for stealthy investigation of unlit areas. The lantern’s flame gives off no heat, but does produce a strong, tarry odour that can be detected by scent (giving -2 to the DC of any attempts to track the bearer by scent).
Moderate transmutation; CL 7th; Craft Wondrous Item, darkvision; Price 28,000 gp*; Weight 2 lb.
*This item is tricky to price, the main referents being a lantern of revealing (priced in the SRD without the x2 multipliers for extended duration and no body slot) and goggles of night. This seems appropriate, but I’m open to suggestions.
I think it's pretty clear why this didn't make it - Silas McDermott's Lantern of Selective Perception beat it both in timing and in clarity of writing. Any comments appreciated, nonetheless!
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here is my item please comment if you would like.
** spoiler omitted **
More powerful than it should be for this category and required a new spell, which makes it non-SRD based and out you go.
Really, the bonuses this thing offers are near to over the top, especially taken together. And needing a limited wish to break one item to make another is well beyond the scope of the contest.
Ok, so I'm throwing my item into the mix. Thoughts? Suggestions? Severe issues?
Discerning Eye
Originally spun by powerful abjurers, these glass orbs have found more fame than initially planned. Designed as a magic locator, they have become invaluable to adventurers of all kinds and even more so to those whose jobs require that they daily discern the truth. These orbs detect any and all magic brought within 40 feet of them and shimmer slowly through each color as they encounter additional magical sources. The color remains constant should no new sources enter its area, but at least one remains. The most unique aspect of the orbs is that they possess the power to detect all magic regardless of any protections such as magic aura, globe of invulnerability or even lead.
As a free action you may specify targets for the orb to ignore or react to. Finally, 3/day the user may see as though under the arcane sight spell. While arcane sight is active in this way the orb ceases to respond to magic as normal.
Moderate divination; CL 10th; Craft Wondrous Item, arcane sight, permanency; Price 120,000 gp; weight 3 lb
Hey, Clark Peterson! ...or anyone!
Bash my item, please!Call me ugly. Question my parentage. Anything for some feedback.
[spoiler]
Cracked Arcane Healing Amulet
This amulet transforms arcane energy into healing power, [snip]
EvilT-
I hate to say it, but yours got rejected by Mona before I read it. We used a system where if two judges clearly would reject an item it is rejected without input from the third. While I wont quote the comment, the problem was essentially the balance issue with arcane magic to healing power. That is a pretty fundamental game balance issue for the classes. Now, you could say we let more egregious violators of balance in the top 32 (the anvil for instance). I would agree with that comment. But we felt that item brought something more with it. Had I had the chance to read yours, I would have agreed with Erik's comment about game balance issues.
And for the record, I am not calling you ugly or questioning yoru parentage. :)
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Bella Sara Charter Superscriber
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Clark said:WTF? I think we all know this guy: The freelancer you asked to give you a 32 page module who gives you 180 pages of stuff with lots of notes and all the art notes and maybe some hand drawn maps of what the art should look like and trying to do everyone's job and is a total pain to work with. This was a 200 word wondrous item assignment. We got a book report. Reject
Actually, I'm not rejecting it to make Mona read it. He he! (and as a small aside, his open game license is all jacked up)
[Erik then read it, was pissed I made him read it and rejected it]
I'm glad you had fun with the contest. And I hope this process was instructional and will help you in the future.
You are failing in your attempts not to set a trend with giving out comments...
;-)
And in that case, I'd be curious what you said about mine...
Does anyone know if Paizo posted a link providing the reason non-advancing items didn't make it. I got the impression some folks already knew why their item didn't advance. It would be nice to read this if such a link exists.
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Oh what the hell. Judge me, cruel peers!
Amaranth Martingale
Two things I think hurt me - too much flavor text, and low pricing, though I did this deliberately:
Make it available for lower level characters
Raise dead can be had for 5
I wanted it to be more in line with the MIC pricing
Wearing it can be dangerousOh yeah, and I managed to spell "Wondrous" incorrectly in my submission (SWEET!).
Actually, I don't think it was the flavor text at all. I felt the amount included was acceptible. What sunk you was cheap reincarnate and possibly the failure of items worn needing a save against magical fire. Add the save and you might do better, otherwise PCs stop fearing death.
I'm curious, how is wearing it dangerous?
Here's mine.
Cracked Arcane Healing Amulet
Too much back story.
I'd change the "must willingly accept" to "takes", but this begs the question "why is the caster taking damage?"
EvilT-
I hate to say it, but yours got rejected by Mona before I read it. We used a system where if two judges clearly would reject an item it is rejected without input from the third. While I wont quote the comment, the problem was essentially the balance issue with arcane magic to healing power. That is a pretty fundamental game balance issue for the classes. Now, you could say we let more egregious violators of balance in the top 32 (the anvil for instance). I would agree with that comment. But we felt that item brought something more with it. Had I had the chance to read yours, I would have agreed with Erik's comment about game balance issues.
And for the record, I am not calling you ugly or questioning yoru parentage. :)
Thanks for the attention. The mechanic was intended to go along with the flavour - the device is broken, and functions in a broken form.
Also, it seemed like a no-no to let arcane spells get swapped one-for-one with 1d4 of healing, so a penalty seemed to be required.
I thought 1 pt of ability damage was an acceptable trade off. It makes the item usable, but not abusable, especially since arcane casters tend to have low CON anyway.
In retrospect, I can see that the backstory might have been too much, but I really enjoy items with a history and a name, rather than just plain old +1 items, even at very low level.
What sunk you was cheap reincarnate and possibly the failure of items worn needing a save against magical fire. Add the save and you might do better, otherwise PCs stop fearing death.
I'm curious, how is wearing it dangerous?
Good call. Both were intentional, by the way (produce flame doesn't harm items, and I was opting for inexpensive revives). I thought about it beforehand, and said, well, it isn’t “RPG Status-Quo,” let’s shake things up. ;) I think I did fair for 10 minutes of work. The dangerous part is the fact that your corpse torches and you don’t get a reincarnate if you don’t meet the requirements. I wasn't worried about burning up their stuff; because chances are good in the hour given, they'd be carried off anyhow. Feedback appreciated!
I have the sneaking feeling Clark's post about altering game dynamics the other day was in regards to my item.
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Wow, I really wish this had its own forum - this is a bit too much of a mess.
Ah well, here's what I dashed out:
Reliquary of Saint Tyrion
What about faiths without saints? Whose fingerbone does it need to be?
The channeling a turning to extend the range and effect of a spell needs to be wordsmithed to more clearly state that.
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Bella Sara Charter Superscriber
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Thanks for the attention. The mechanic was intended to go along with the flavour - the device is broken, and functions in a broken form.Also, it seemed like a no-no to let arcane spells get swapped one-for-one with 1d4 of healing, so a penalty seemed to be required.
I thought 1 pt of ability damage was an acceptable trade off. It makes the item usable, but not abusable, especially since arcane casters tend to have low CON anyway.
In retrospect, I can see that the backstory might have been too much, but I really enjoy items with a history and a name, rather than just plain old +1 items, even at very low level.
Turnip - At first, the whole broken magic item thing seemed unworkable - what happpens when someone creates a fixed one? - but then you went on to explain that all duplicates were flawed and I really liked that idea.
But, then the magic item set up an expectation of a non-flawed version that could convert arcane magic to healing efficiently. That's a quasi-sacred cow, so I think the flawed magic flavor would have been better on a different effect that could be more powerful without being so game breaking.
On top of that, arcane healing is a pretty ugly thing to begin with. It has to be sub-par as compared to cleric magic or else you do kill the sacred-cow. That then begs the question of why you wouldn't just use any of the other classes that have more efficient healing abilities instead (of which there are many) instead of this item. In 2e, this item would have been much better because healing was much more limited.
Your item was almost like a sword for wizards to improve their combat efficiency. Such an item is already fighting an uphill battle because it doesn't really add that much value to the character. If I were a wizard, I wouldn't use this - I woudl sell it and buy healing potions or something to make my offensive spells more effective.
And, ultimately, the cost of the item and using it was very high. The cost of the Con loss will probably be much greater than the hp healed.
I hope that wasn't too harsh. I really loved the flavor, I just didn't get into the effect.
Edit: 8,000 gps would buy 320 potions of clw or 1760 hp worth of healing. Plus no Con loss. Just a quick thing to note.
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Oh well, what the hell. Here we go, my item (inspired by Stone of Alarm and Figurines of Wondrous Power):
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Murderbloom
Just because WotC did it, does not mean that it would be valid in this contest. Plus the stone of alarm is not a trap, but a security device - it alerts the owner, not kills random passers by.
Heck, if Clark is willing, after all the chatter I've done about this element of the contest, I'll take my licks as well. ;)
I confess the method and mdoe is more of interest to me than the result, but I'd happily take a public critique for solidarity. Though I'm betting Lilith mostly nailed it, as I let my writing fail to draw out what I saw as the item's benies.
On top of that, arcane healing is a pretty ugly thing to begin with.
It's not that bad... bards do it all the time.
Cheers,
Roger
Thanks, judges!
It is cool that you are giving some feedback to those of us who are asking for it. I'm wondering if you can give me some feedback on my item. I don't have a copy of the text with me right now, but it is called Communique of the Archmage. I realized after submitting it that I left out one fairly important piece of information. Just wondering what the judges thought and please feel free to post the text since I can not. Thanks again and hope you continue to search for talent in this fashion.
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This was mine...
Doreen's Delightful Dressing Screen** spoiler omitted **
I think the real issue here is the quick donning of armor and the duplication that it entails (the original is still somewhere). I would change this to clothing carried by the user (or hung on it or stored in it).
I like the items stored in it concept, but not that it is limited to armor and magic items. Adventurer's should be able to quick change into court clothes or formal wear as well as armor.
In fact, it should only work for sets of clothes stored in it. Hope their your size...
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I would hate to think I got disqualified on anything but the pricing, which was the iffiest part as far I was concerned.
Smirk’s Periapt of Inerrant Travel
Shrink the flavor text to just say something like "Smirk thought he could smell diamonds and kept getting his friends lost looking for them. A cleric made this for him."
I think this is a good item, but not necessarily a rockstar item. I'd include it in my campaign.
What the heck, let a lurker post his submission.
Tunic of Negative Energy Reversal:
The inside of this black long-sleeved tunic is so white that it appears to shimmer with its own light. It is a boon for both those allied with clerics who channel negative energy as well as those who make it their business to hunt them.
The tunic converts any negative energy damage sustained by the wearer from inflict spells and effects to positive energy, thus healing the wearer as if the spell was instead a cure spell or effect. For example, if the wearer is subject to an inflict light wounds spell, instead of taking damage from the spell he heals a number of hit points equal to the damage that would have been taken as if the spell was a cure light wounds spell.
Faint conjuration and necromancy; CL 3rd; Craft Wondrous Item, cure light wounds, inflict light wounds; Price 1,000 gp.
My own review:
1) Not enough flash
2) Name stinks
3) Possible question on the use of Inflict light wounds.
4) Description doesn't flow
Mechanically, my design goals were to make it simple. I like the Tunic aspect because there aren't enough items for that slot. I feel the price was right, as I wanted it accessable to low-level characters,and at high level it just doesn't make sense.
What it brings to the game is that it helps solve the problem of a player wanting to play a negative energy channeling cleric, but the rest of the players want a healer. This allows the cleric player to play the cleric they want, and puts the burden on the other players to do something to be able to receive spontanious healing.
Congratulations to all the finalists and I look forward to reading your future submissions.
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Probably not the best item I've ever churned out but I thought it was cool. I am posting it here in the event someone finds it useful for their game (and to inspire everyone to learn a little about Persian carpets - which truly are works of art).
Prayer Rugs of the Family Arahkshah
Flavor is OK, but the power could be breaking. The one use per day only means every cleric must have one, yes?
I'm not keen on maximized as a feat to begin with, especially without the level cost tacked onto the spell. Perhaps instead of every healing spell, the caster can choose just one. Also, what about healing spells gained by sacrificing another spell (the name of the mechanic escapes me at the moment...)? If these are covered as well, then this is a broken item. If only the memorized healing spells, not so much.
Thanks for the comments, Sebastian. I've learned a lot about game design from this thread and from the winning items!
Oh well, I took a risk on an item I thought was cool, and might want as a wizard player.
Thanks for the attention. The mechanic was intended to go along with the flavour - the device is broken, and functions in a broken form.Also, it seemed like a no-no to let arcane spells get swapped one-for-one with 1d4 of healing, so a penalty seemed to be required.
I thought 1 pt of ability damage was an acceptable trade off. It makes the item usable, but not abusable, especially since arcane casters tend to have low CON anyway.
In retrospect, I can see that the backstory might have been too much, but I really enjoy items with a history and a name, rather than just plain old +1 items, even at very low level.
Turnip - At first, the whole broken magic item thing seemed unworkable - what happpens when someone creates a fixed one? - but then you went on to explain that all duplicates were flawed and I really liked that idea.
But, then the magic item set up an expectation of a non-flawed version that could convert arcane magic to healing efficiently. That's a quasi-sacred cow, so I think the flawed magic flavor would have been better on a different effect that could be more powerful without being so game breaking.
On top of that, arcane healing is a pretty ugly thing to begin with. It has to be sub-par as compared to cleric magic or else you do kill the sacred-cow. That then begs the question of why you wouldn't just use any of the other classes that have more efficient healing abilities instead (of which there are many) instead of this item. In 2e, this item would have been much better because healing was much more limited.
Your item was almost like a sword for wizards to improve their combat efficiency. Such an item is already fighting an uphill battle because it doesn't really add that much value to the character. If I were a wizard, I wouldn't use this - I woudl sell it and buy healing potions or something to make my offensive spells more effective.
And, ultimately, the cost of the item and using it was very high. The cost of the Con loss...
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Oh well, here's mine:
Pillow of Comfort
"This soft white cushion is beautifully decorated with a sleeping elf in multicolored stitchwork.
3/day, the cushion allows any armor wearing creature to regain hit points as if it had rested a full 8 hours by only sleeping for 3 hours on the cushion. In addition to its restorative qualities, the cushion allows spellcasters to regain spells as if they had rested the requisite amount of time usually needed. If the cushion is used a full 8 hours (without wearing armor), it grants the restorative benefits of a full 24 hours of rest."
Moderate Transmutation and Enchantment; CL 8th; Craft Wondrous Item, Bear’s Endurance, Deep Slumber; Price 100,000gp
Price calculated (table 7-33, DMG p.285):
Spell effect: Use-activated or continuous – spell level (5) x caster level (8) x 2000gp = 80,000
Charges per day: Divide by (5 divided by charges per day) 1.6 = 50,000
No space limitation: Multiply entire cost by 2 = 100,000
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Here's mine. I think I know what's wrong with it, but I'll wait and see what others say.
Crafter’s Toolbox
Hmmm. I like this one, but I can see where it might be too close to a real world item. The craft bonus is probably too high for having the right tools, even magical ones. I'd recommend lowering it to +2.
One of my gaming groups would kill for an item like this at the moment.
Feel free to post your non-advancing items in this thread. We don't mind.Well, since the Man Himself has said so, I'll post mine. I welcome any input, especially from designers, but I expect the judges will decline since that request cannot fairly be made by everyone:
Prescience Pillow
Does too much and makes exploring not a hassle. Not any bounds or guidelines on how much trap info they get and the +2 bonus lasts too long and appears to be stackable, that is, on day 7 I can have a +14 stacked up and ready to use.
I saw this style of comment under the "Pet Peeves" thread, and I had some thoughts about that. In a world (like ours) without magic, many of the annoyances of daily life is dealt with by technology. Do you have a toilet in your house? Your grandparents (or likely great-grandparents) probably didn't. 100 years ago, people couldn't fly. Within the last ten years or so, cell phones went from bulky items only few could afford to iPhones, Razrs, etc. In short, there was a need for a device, and the need was met by technology.
However, what about the need for technology in a world with magic? Think about it. In a way, the fantasy world of D&D is more "advanced" that the 21st century. A person cannot fly without a bulky jet pack or more, let alone teleport anywhere else on Earth instantly. Any disease, injury, or even death itself can be instantly and completely cured. In a world like D&D, anyone with sufficient intelligence or wisdom (with experience) can cast magic. In a fantasy world, would an airliner or a car be invented? What about mass farming in a world where magic can create food? What about landfills when you could open a gate to the elemental plane of fire, etc. Why electricity when even a novice magician can create light at will?
If you compare magic items prices to other mundane items, magic items are bargain. Most characters are absurdly wealthy by the time they reach 20th level. Ergo, why wouldn't a wealthy person want to deal with the hassles of common life when he instead he could use magic to overcome the inconvenience. When was the last time Warren Buffet or Bill Gates flew on a commercial airline? A moderately powerful character has a dragon-slaying sword, a back pack that holds 3 times more than it should, but he's going to rough it? An adventurer makes his "living" by adventuring. An adventurer would buy whatever he could to make adventurer easier and less of a "hassle."
Gene Roddenberry had it right when he invented the transporter for Star Trek. One reason was the cost of special effects made shuttle landing sequences too expensive, but also no one wants to see how Kirk, Spock, etc. got to the planet...they wanted to see what they did when they got there. In other words, Roddenberry didn’t want the tedium of travel to interfere with the story. Now can being lost in the woods or desert lost, hungry, and tired a good story? Yep. Is it a good story for characters who teleport around the globe in a thought? No.
In the games I play, I don't like counting how many days rations I've got or gallons of water I'm toting. I want to get to dungeon and find the bad guy. After all, that’s why haversacks, bags of holding, and portable holes are so popular. They allow you for the most part to carry a lot of stuff (and loot) without worry necessarily about how much it weighs. I guess it is a style of play thing. Roleplaying out the tedious nature of daily life is boring; real life is tedious enough.
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Here's my item that didn't make the cut. In comparing it with the winners and with various discussions I think it is probably too expensive for what it does and the back story really does nothing for the item.
Anyway thanks for the chance to submit an item and any feedback is appreciated.
Steve
I like it and can see where it would creat a new kind of music (where the drummer accompanies himself). I think the method for determining time and bonus may be a little clunky and that might have scored against you. Perhaps it can be srtreamlined some way...
In the spirit of standing up and taking my licks like a man:
Bracelets of Alliance
Forged in sets of five, a bracelet of alliance provides a low-level awareness of the actions of anyone else wearing a bracelet from the same set within fifty feet.
This gives the wearer a +1 insight bonus to their initiative and attack rolls for each conscious ally wearing a bracelet within range. So if three characters in a party wore Bracelets of Alliance, each would have a +2 insight bonus to their initiative and attack rolls.
For each bracelet missing from the set, deduct 25% from the price. A single bracelet of alliance is worthless.
Moderate transmutation; CL 9th; Craft Wondrous Item, telepathic bond; Price 157,000 gp.
- Rubbish name. I mean, really. What was I thinking?
- I cocked up on the cost. Way overpriced.
- Just not Wondrous enough. All the winners had way more flavour.
Anything else, I'd love to hear. It'll help me get better.
And, as as aside, I just wanted to give props to Tallghost for the Portable Portal. I think that baby's just great.