GM Captain Trips - Rise of the Greenskins! - Goblin Adventure Path

Game Master Chad Newman

"Those will make a great start on a necklace... Good shot, Nurpus!" Mugmuff starts stripping the body of anything that looks valuable, making a pile of all the loot. "Nice bow... too bad it's so big... but might be worth something to someone."

"Who need healing? I knows you do, Bart. Comes here."

Gretcha pulls out her healy-wand, using it on herself first.

You rolled a 1 on your UMD, that wand is useless till tomorrow. :)

so two things how are we caring all this big ass stuff on our small frames and Gretcha i have the CLW spell i could use the wand and not have to do the UMD check if you'd like ^_^

edit

and i think a failed bonk on the head would knock him out lol

Kovak walk over to Bart as Gretcha is smacking him with the wand doing nothing "brights eyes it ok Kovak can help Bart be better" and Kovak slaps Bart in the face and his wounds begin to heal

CLW: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (5) + 3 = 8

Torch picks himself up angrily and sets the building alight. "There, that show stoopid building," he fumes.

Nurpus springs up, and holds his rifle over his head with both hands, and begins jumping up and down.

"Purpus, we show her! Good job. No explodes in face. Not one!"

After a few moments of celebration he stops in his tracks and looks around, as if just realizing there are others near him.

"Oh, good fight friends. We do good together. Let see what in her pockets..."

perception: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (20) + 14 = 34 checking for secret pockets, hidden things, even things she might have swallowed or otherwise organically hidden...

He checks her thoroughly and starts piling things up evenly.

'Ufff, Silly shanks thinks arrows can kill Biggest Bestested Headestest... Errr Bart."

Crap, I totally missed the 1. Okay so I got healed and Bart got SOME healing (only 5). Break out the potions!

The goblins descend upon the corpse, pillaging it of valuables faster than the blink of an eye. On the body they find a very nice looking longbow, some fancy studded leather, a masterwork shortsword, three potions, two vials of antitoxin, an amulet, a cloak, 14 arrows and 10 different looking arrows, a small bead, a wand, a backpack, a bedroll, a climber’s kit, flint and steel, a pair of manacles, some silk rope (50 ft.), three sunrods, some trail rations (4 days), a waterskin, a winter blanket, a wooden holy symbol, 8 pp, and 2 gp.

The longbow, studded leather, amulet, cloak, bead, wand, potions, and 10 arrows all radiate magic when checked.

spellcraft: 1d20 + 1 ⇒ (15) + 1 = 16

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Kovak takes a good long look at the amulet

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Crap, I totally missed the 1. Okay so I got healed and Bart got SOME healing (only 5). Break out the potions!

well I heald him for 8 so he's at 14 ; {

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Gretcha will cast detect magic and spellcraft all the things.

Spellcraft longbow: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (19) + 5 = 24
Spellcraft studded leather: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (1) + 5 = 6 <- no clue
Spellcraft amulet: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (6) + 5 = 11 <- probably not
Spellcraft cloak: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (20) + 5 = 25
Spellcraft bead: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (5) + 5 = 10 <-probably not
Spellcraft wand: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (13) + 5 = 18
Spellcraft potions: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (13) + 5 = 18
Spellcraft 10 arrows: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (7) + 5 = 12 <- probably not

So Gretcha can identify at least the bow, cloak, wand, and potions. I've put placeholders for them in the Loot Log and will update it when we get info on the items.

Thanks as always for keeping track of loots.

Gretcha will cast detect magic and spellcraft all the things.

[dice=Spellcraft longbow]1d20+5
[dice=Spellcraft studded leather]1d20+5 <- no clue
[dice=Spellcraft amulet]1d20+5 <- probably not
[dice=Spellcraft cloak]1d20+5
[dice=Spellcraft bead]1d20+5 <-probably not
[dice=Spellcraft wand]1d20+5
[dice=Spellcraft potions]1d20+5
[dice=Spellcraft 10 arrows]1d20+5 <- probably not

Composite Longbow +1 (+1 STR), Cloak of Resistance +1, Wand of Cure Light Wounds (24 charges), Potion of Lesser Restoration (2), Potion of Delay Poison, 10 Sleep Arrows.

what about my roll...for the amulet nvm I guess a 14 would not find that out lol

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what about my roll...for the amulet nvm I guess a 14 would not find that out lol

That would be correct :)

Recognizing the wand, Gretcha hands it to Kovak. "This another healy wand. You use it on Bighead and others that hurted."

She then holds up the other magic items. "Any yous use these? They all magicky, so we gets lots of chits and golds for them."

What deity is the holy symbol of?

"Me gots first pick last time... will wait maybe just take chits this time."

Kovak twirls the wand in his hand "Thaks ye" brights eyes Bart comes here Kovak will take away pain"

Wand CLW: 1d8 + 3 ⇒ (7) + 3 = 10

"that should be goods for ye' bart"

Unfortunately, Kovak, when you use a wand of CLW it's always 1d8+1 (cuz it's caster level 1) so he only gets 8 HP back. But that's pretty damn good!

Gretcha looks at the other items she wasn't able to identify. She shrugs and puts on the amulet, and holds the bead in her hand, concentrating on it and trying to make it do something.
UMD bead: 1d20 + 10 ⇒ (19) + 10 = 29

This could either be really awesome or really deadly. We'll see LOL. But it's what Gretcha would do!

oh ok good to know using a wand is another first for me lol and yes I have been playing for 14+years $_$

"Nothing good. Just gold for Nurpus."

Just so I'm sure, Getcha is trying to activate blindly correct? :)

that's what I got from it ^+^

Every now and then you get to have a little bit of fun as a GM. It's rare, but it happens.

Gretcha throws on the amulet and grabs the tiny bead, frustrated that she cannot make sense out of either item. Placing the strange bead on her head, she scrunches up her face, concentrating as hard as she can on the item. Sweat begins to trickle down her forehead as she focuses on activating the item by sheer will alone. Suddenly a bit of gas escapes her rear in a loud toot as the final shove of her mental activation is complete, and the bead suddenly turns into a two foot high pile of burning logs, which quickly come crashing down on her head, clubbing her and burning her as they tumble to the ground.

Clubbing Damage: 1d4 ⇒ 3 Burning Damage: 1d4 ⇒ 3

Obviously this is a Campfire Bead.

"Hah! Gretcha talk about be hot goblin. Now real hot goblin! Torch, she you type now? She on fire!"

"GRAA! STOOPID BEAD! WHY YOU TURN INTO LOGS?!?!?!"

Gretcha scrambles out from under the fire, patting her raggedy clothes to keep them from burning off of her.

I was sorta-in-the-back-of-my-head hoping something like that would happen. Because goblins. :-D

"Hey yous, use healy stick on me. That hurted." She points at Kovak.

when she started the fire
"eehhehe, that one way to start a fire"Kovak falls to the floor in a fit of laughter

when she asked me to heal her
Kovak is still on the floor laughing his guts out making fart noises with his mouth and laughing all the harder

Torch laughs heartily at Greta's antics.

Bart laughs at Gretcha before handing Torch a burning log from the pile.

kovak get up and stops his fit "ok ok here that beter?"

wand CLW: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (1) + 1 = 2

edit

lol min well your at 13 now

"no need more?"

"Need more, numb-head! You see this burns on face? Looks like I might need more, yathinks??"

"ok hehe ye' right ye' eyes not as brights as normally is" so kovak pokes her with his stick again

wand CLW: 1d8 + 1 ⇒ (5) + 1 = 6

so kovak pokes her with his stick again

giggidy

"Das better." Gretcha makes an obscene gesture involving the wand and her hand shaped into an "o" and winks at Kovak.

Here's hoping we have no children in this game :)

ah goblin innuendo lol

edit

so were to now?

Still laughing too hard to post anything sensible...

The goblins quickly sort out their plunder and bonk a few of their number with the happy sticks. Once they sort everything out, and Gretcha gags the group with her uncontrollable farting, they pick up and make their way further south. In a short time they come to a barricade loaded with goblins. Chief Ripnugget stands not far away, directing goblin archers and attackers as they strike against a similarly dug-in group of humans about 50' away. Every now and then a group of goblins will leap over the barricade, charging towards the enemy lines, only to be cut down by arrows and bolts fired by the humans. All around the scene, fires rage, the town being consumed by flame. Pillars of smoke rise high into the air as Sandpoint is slowly being burned away.

Ripnugget looks to you as you approach and raises his hands into the air, gesturing wildly. "Yous! Heroes come heres! he calls, his voice barely rising above the sounds of goblins and humans shouting and crying out in pain. As you move closer he hops down from his perch of boxes and draws you in close. "Yous need help break longshanks line. Dems defend good. Needs goblin ingu...ingini...inguin...needs smarts!" he barks, frustrated that his assault has been stopped. "Gobs bring fire chuckers and fireworks! Yous needs use dems on longshanks, break defense, make booms!" he explains, pointing to two wild looking contraptions that seem to be part catapult, part sling, part ballista. Next to them are small barrels with short fuses leading out of them. Also there is another barrel with several dozen fireworks and candles sticking out of it.

Mechanic of encounter: You will need to work together to use the fire-chuckers and fireworks to attack the enemy lines. Each fire-chucker requires two goblins to operate, one to load and one to fire. Loading the chucker is not without risk, as it is possible to drop the keg of explosives and cause an explosion. The fireworks work much line a ranged attack with a non-proficient weapon. Fireworks take one round to light and another to fire. To use either weapon you will need to be on the front lines, and it is likely you will be taking fire from the human side. Goblins will provide cover fire, and every "hit" by a goblin negates one attack that would have hit.

Determine who is going to fill which role. Kovak can also choose to focus on performing instead of directly participating, which will give all goblins a bonus to their actions.

Mugmuff, with his decent dexterity, offers to fire one of the catallistas... "Me's not bad with firing thingies. I will shoot ones." He takes his position at the firing mechanism, and hopes someone will volunteer to load for him.

Kovak get up and the back of some dead longshank and begins to tune up his violin

Gretcha sizes up her allies quickly.
"Nurp, you good at shoots things too. You take other big fire-lobber. Bighead, you help load one, Torchy, you help load other one. I take firework and use eye-starings at stupid longshanks, keeps them from shooty-ing yous."

Nurpus caresses his rifle in two hands, staring at the barrel as a man would stare at a beautiful woman.

"No worry Purpus, you still my favorite."

He then moves up and takes the controls of one of the fire chuckers.

Fire-Chuckers are considered Siege Weapons, and we don't have anyone proficient with those, so remember the -4 to your attacks. They take a full round action to load, but can be fired the same turn at the end of initiative. You are attacking squares with these weapons, not targets, so please indicate your targeted square with a color of some kind. I'll clear the targets after each round. They only have an accurate range of 30', so keep the range penalty for distance beyond 30' in mind. They have a max range of 120'. The AC to hit a square is 10 for the front line of the barricade, and AC 14 for anything beyond. The chuckers misfire on a roll of 1-3. They do 2d8 points of damage in a 5' burst from the square of impact.

For those loading, you will need to make a Reflex Save with each loading attempt. Failure means you didn't get the keg loaded properly, failure by more than 5 means there is a mishap. The DC is 12

The fireworks are a standard action to light and a standard action to aim and fire. Remember the non-proficiency penalty. They have a range of 40', so also keep in mind the range mod of -2. The good news is they are touch attacks that deal 1d6+4 damage.

All of the weapons you are using can scatter. So be prepared!

The map is now up!

Initiative!

Goblins: 1d20 + 5 ⇒ (15) + 5 = 20
Humans: 1d20 + 2 ⇒ (17) + 2 = 19

And the goblins are up!

Kovak begins to play

"Goblins sneak and goblins hide,
Goblins hunt when dark outside,
Goblins creep and Goblins crawl
Goblins come when babies bawl

Goblins sneak and goblins hide,
Goblins hunt when dark outside,
Deep in the forest, out of sight,
Goblins eat baby tonight.
"

not original but a goodin

Gretcha will stare evil-ly at the longshanks archer with the purple eye drawn on it.
-2 to saves and (more importantly) attack rolls for as long as Gretcha keeps staring at him.

She will then light her firework, ready to fire it at one of the longshanks in the no-man's land on her next round.

Gretcha will stare evil-ly at the longshanks archer with the purple eye drawn on it.

-2 to saves and (more importantly) attack rolls for as long as Gretcha keeps staring at him.

They are out of the 30' range. And the guys in the middle area are actually goblins heading towards the other barricade.

Bart loads the camtapult, cammapult, cattlepult GIANT BOOM-BOOM.

Reflex: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (17) + 7 = 24

to hit dc 14, -2 for range included: 1d20 + 6 - 4 - 2 ⇒ (11) + 6 - 4 - 2 = 11

Mugmuff fires, assuming his was loaded successfully, (at the square marked in magenta), but misses...

trips, please calculate where i actually hit thanks