I've been playing RPGs for many years, and had great fun in college. There was never a complaint about my style, and I had to turn players away because there were just too many some times.
I got married and moved to a smaller town and had kids, the only players eventually available were my stepson's friends. Things started well, we played for many years, but then two key very good players moved away (they grow up, they get lives).
Now, things have gone downhill. I've had a couple scheduled game sessions (I give at least two weeks notice in advance) where nobody showed up. Lately, there were games where players had a bender the night before and were not in the best of shape to play. My stepson alone shows up 4 hours late into the game and then sits and distracts those who did show on time while he updates his character.
One player (who use to be really good about showing up) who said she would play has now missed three games in a row....two other new players have really lowered the standards of chit-chat in the game, sexual innuendos (which I can forgive some of that), outright mocking of other players, etc. (and the female wasn't chased away because of the innuendos, she's just as bad as the boys).
Despite telling them my concerns about this, and telling some to change their ways or leave the game, it hasn't changed anything.
So, I'm getting a little tired of it, and I think it's time to just hang up playing. I know I probably won't find other players in this small town area (many of these players come from 30 miles or more away), I'd rather just disband it than continue to go through with this...
Just wanted to vent... thanks for your time.
Been there before, and I feel your pain. If you really want to keep playing, try doing it over the internet. That's what I did. Either way, good luck!
Been there before, and I feel your pain. If you really want to keep playing, try doing it over the internet. That's what I did. Either way, good luck!
Thanks, I think the thing that bugs me the most is I finally found this great space to play in, it's private, we even have a large flatscreen to put up maps and now it will go to waste because of these dorks.
Anyway, yeah, maybe I'll just join an internet campaign....
Sounds good. I'll give that try. Thanks.
Sounds like to tried to make people who went gamer into gamers when thr people who were gamers moved. It happens.
Time to check out pfs.
Yup, that's it exactly. My two confident, knowledgeable players could always keep the rest of the group in check. On my own, not so much.
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Having played with my core group of players (and some of the occasional ones) for nearly 30 years in some cases, I really don't know what I'd do if faced with problems like these. I've seldom played with anyone new.
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For some years I didn't play much, because I reasoned that no game at all is better than a game with people you don't particularly like, and/or who don't really want to play. I feel vindicated in that reasoning.
I, unfortunately, have been in groups like you describe. They are just too toxic to make work. If your gut says it's time to bail, then it probable is.
Don't know if youre still in touch with your old group, but what my group does is plan a yearly meeting in the summer. Friday though Sunday all the rpging you can squeeze in. You get to see old friends, catch up etc.
Some of my old group that's the only time they get to rpg all year.
Anyway just a thought.
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I'm starting to feel very lucky...at least as far as gaming groups go.
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I had some problems with players not showing up or having chit chat delay the game too much.
Turns out a lot of it was caused by the game. They didn't like the GM, they didn't like the adventure, they didn't like the system. But they didn't realize that they didn't like any of it. They were interested in hanging out, but not interested in the game itself. And it was kind of low on the priority list, so if anything else came up they would do that instead. Important things like sleeping or playing video games or dog-sitting for a family member.
We changed systems, changed GMs, and started a new campaign that they really got into. Now they're showing up early, staying longer, and making every effort to show up for game.
Same group, completely different attitude.
Maybe your players just need something new.
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I'm starting to feel very lucky...at least as far as gaming groups go.
Thanks, my old group is scattered across the states. Pulling us together even on a yearly basis would be next to impossible and they've moved on with their lives....
FORTUNATELY, I'm starting to find some new players and putting a whole new group together. I'm being careful in my selection, feeling them out before I invite them to my table. There may be hope here yet.
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My honest opinion Dug don't give up. Look for a new group. I had to branch out and leave most of my old group behind as well. With two withdrawing into the worlds of MMOs to hide from the reality of life. To another thrash talking about me behind my back to a good friend of mine. To the good ones of the bunch moving away. Don't give up on the hobby because of some rotten apples imo.
Important things like sleeping or playing video games or dog-sitting for a family member.
Maybe it's me but I don't consider any of the above important. With the exception maybe of sleeping. As sometimes ones has to work long hours. Now going to the hospital because a family member or friend is sick. Work. Spending time with the wife/girlfriend is important. Missing more than three session when I DM because of video games gets you banned from my table. You get three warning but after that your gone. I warn a player at the start of the campaign. After that I won't even said a invite by email or in person.
Joining a group is a commitment not a major one. Nor is anyone forced but neither does one show up whenever they feel like. If one cannot or will not commit some time to a campaign. Don't join one. Just like a personal time is precious and their own. So is everyone else at the table.
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I'm building a new group. I didn't think it would happen that fast. They're younger, but playing with someone who has never played the game before is a wonderful experience. Also, my kids can play and not have to listen to all that filthy language.
Maybe it's me but I don't consider any of the above important.
I was trying to be sarcastic.
Dug -- I feel your pain.
The group you got is not worth the effort you put into your game. Find a new group--maybe go to a weekend convention when you can.
Good luck. And no game is better than a bad game. Especially when you can load Baldur's Gate, Neverwinter Nights or Might and Magic and have fun at your own pace.
Thanks, GM Tribute.
I hear you, OP.
I ventured into the crazy world of Play By Post gaming to satisfy my itch to play. I liked it so much I wrote a guide. It's a very different animal, but a lot of fun once you get used to it.
There's a very active PbP community right here on the paizo forums. If it sounds like something you'd like, jump into the Recruitment forums.
Good luck!
I'm building a new group. I didn't think it would happen that fast. They're younger, but playing with someone who has never played the game before is a wonderful experience. Also, my kids can play and not have to listen to all that filthy language.
Yes. This. My best two groups yet were more than three-quarters or more completely new players. Never played an RPG in their life.
I am always up for inviting someone new to play.
A follow up... *sigh* two of my new recruited players were taken away by a younger DM (someone closer to their age). I ended up with one player. Another DM felt sorry me and played, but will not be able to play regularly as he has his own campaign.
So, I think that's the final straw. It's time to hang it up. I had a good 30 years of this. So, I appreciate all the great advice. Maybe down the road I'll join an online game, but for now I'm taking a big fat break from all this.
Thanks for the advice and support, guys. I really do appreciate it.
Use the time to read the guides about PBP.
Also, you can look at the homebrew section and suggest things you invented for your games. Also look through advice. You may get and give advice from experiences.
Will do. Thanks.