| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
I've been reading and looking over the Prophecies of Kalistrade and a bizarre idea brewed in my head: could the Prophecies of Kalistrade been created by none other than the polar opposite force, the Savored Sting Calistria herself?
How could this be a conclusion, you might wonder. After all, the kalistocrats and their doctrine are as lawful and ascetic as you can get while Calistria is hedonistic and spontaneous as all hell, but here are my arguments:
1) The Prophet Itself: Kalistrade is shrouded in mystery. Nothing is known save his gender and the fact that he was an eccentric mystic who recorded what he dreamed. Such a nebulous originator leaves so much for interpretation.
2) The Name: Pretty self-explanatory. Kalistrade and Calistria share a lot of letters here. I know, I know, by itself this is tinfoil hat territory but hear me out further.
3) The Symbol: Look at the symbol of the Prophecies of Kalistrade. Now look at the holy symbol of Calistria. A circle overlapping three points. Suspicious in its thematic similarity, isn't it?
"But Al," you cry out, "this still makes no freakin' sense. Assuming these are all true, what possible reason could Calistria have to form the Kalistrade?" Here are my theories.
1) Calistria desired it. Calistria is Kalistrade, or Kalistrade was one of her worshipers. The Prophecies adhere to no god in particular, instead focusing on money and ownership. Calistria may have created the prophecies from any number of reasons, but my favorite is this: it's a honey trap. The prophecies are antithetical to Calistria, and therefore she'd hate anyone who would follow them. That said, most who do would go to Abadar instead of the Prophecies, meaning their souls would belong to him. How do you deprive a god of worshippers? You create an alternative. There was no way Calistria would convince these uptight money-lovers to worship her, so instead she made them worship a false ideal with no god, promising immortality for accomplishing a goal when there would be nothing but oblivion and purgatory at the end of it. The alternative is that maybe she was bored and wanted to create an 'opponent', something for her worshipers to trick and tempt or, if they fail and the Kalistrade achieves its goal of total domination, Calistria will have manufactured the perfect target for a vengeful sting, revealing that the Kalistrade was nothing but a farce, that immortality would not be granted, and that they have no one but themselves to blame for falling for such a lie. The Kalistrade is Calistria's secret toy, one she will enjoy toying with until it's time to play with.
2) The Prophet misinterpreted. Kalistrade recorded what he saw as a dream - possibly one sent by Calistria - less as a vision of what life should be and more as some kind of astral temptation to overcome. He had visions of wantonly wasteful spending, so he penned that wealth should be hoarded. He saw hoards of men and women in orgies, and rather than feeling aroused he instead was disgusted, penning that sexual abstinence and minimal physical contact resulted in purity of body and spirit. He saw a poor-looking drunkard enjoying life and heading for an early grave, but instead of taking it as a sign of how short life is and how it should be relished, he took it as dire warning and a promise for immortality when enough wealth was accrued. The fact that the prophecy is noted for being independent of divine connection means it could be either the mad rantings of a disturbed mind taken to logical extremes or a wrongful translation of an actual deity's will.
So many possibilities, but remember: it's just a theory. A tabletop theory!
Now I'm wondering how often prophets get the wrong vision.
Do they have tin foil on Golarion?
Actually, possibilities #1 and #2 are not mutually exclusive -- Calistria would probably have a good idea of how the prophet she was sending the visions to would misinterpret them, and play him along for a fool to create the honey trap.
The possibility that she tricked the Prophets of Kalistrade into creating and training themselves in a prestige class so lousy that nobody in their right mind would enter it is just icing on the cake.
One comment on # 1 - no "oblivion or purgatory" for followers of the prophecies. They just go to the alignment appropriate plan - since it's ostensibly a LN philosophy, followers who are doing it right would just go on to Axis.
Calistria may well find the results of the prophecies hilarious though.
True, philosophy IS taken strongly into account when deciding the fate of a soul, but most of the Kalistrade divorce themselves from deities. If even a few of these unfortunates were to be tossed into Groetus or forced to spend eternity pondering their egocentric hubris in the dull vastness of the Boneyard, Calistria would find it hilarious. If those souls end up in Axis, it's no big deal, really. They were going to end up there anyway, and Calistria, like most deities, would know not to feel spited by Pharasma's judgment. The fact that she has a possibility of sending them somewhere else is nevertheless enticing.
@Mudfoot: I'm certain it's not in widespread use, but tin foil is just flattened aluminum with traces of iron and silicon. I can easily imagine it being found as part of some specialized or professional tools such as alchemist kits. And who knows, with psychics now a thing, it's only a matter of time before someone creates a magical tin foil hat to give themselves a resistance to their abilities.
@UnArcaneElection: Yep. I thought about that, too, and I was going to put that as my third theory, but I figured "they can math it up, and this post is getting long anyway."
It really needs the ultimate campaign downtime rules to be something semi-useful. This will give you the capital you need to make use of the class's gold-dependent spells and abilities.
|
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
@Mudfoot: I'm certain it's not in widespread use, but tin foil is just flattened aluminum with traces of iron and silicon. I can easily imagine it being found as part of some specialized or professional tools such as alchemist kits. And who knows, with psychics now a thing, it's only a matter of time before someone creates a magical tin foil hat to give themselves a resistance to their abilities.
Too late. Go to the PRD for Occult adventures and look for Tin Cap.
Holy crap, it really does exist. That's hilarious!
@ Aldrius - Rejecting deities isn't what gets your quarantined in the Boneyard. Pharasma generally only cares about your faith to the extent it helps with sorting you out (because going to a divine realm can get very different results from just going to the alignment appropriate plane. For example, the duergar are a LE society that follows a NE god who lives in the Abyss. So a faithless LE duergar would go to Hell while a faithful LE duergar goes to Droskar's Abyssal realm. Which I think is hilarious.)
Rather, rejecting the afterlife itself is what results in getting quarantined in the Boneyard.
So a prophet of Kalistrade would actually need to tell Pharasma and the psychopomps to sod off. While many Rahadoumi actually do just that, I can't picture the Dhumans doing that.
Based on the River of Souls article, getting quarantined is a voluntary act.
@Zhangar: if that's the case, then the Kalistocrats are doing just that. After all, the main goal of the Prophecies is to gain immortality through material wealth, thus shunning the afterlife. We also know that the Kalistocrats claim their teachings are divorced of the gods, thus granting them immunity to the current age where prophecy is uncertain. This is plenty of reason for Pharasma, the goddess of the afterlife, death, and prophecy, to view the Kalistocrats as arrogantly defying the natural order.
One of the funny things about the Prophets of Kalistrade is that Prophets of Kalistrade who quit being Lawful Neutral or who violate the dietary and sexual prohibitions set forth in the Prophecies of Kalistrade lose class abilities and cannot progress in the prestige class unless they get an Atonement . . . Which is NOT in their spell list, so they can't get it from a faithful Prophet of Kalistrade, but have to go to a Cleric, Druid, Oracle, or Inquisitor, or get a Wizard, Sorcerer, or Psychic to duplicate it with a Limited Wish. Calistria must be rolling on the floor . . . .
It's all a cosmic joke. Then again, this class literally seems to be the "get someone else to do it" kind, with features focused on making deals and receiving and using capital to further empower himself. It'd be useful for a businessman. Very much an NPC non-adventurer class.
At least until someone does a campaign where the whole point is to cause internal economic collapse specifically caused by the Kalistrade's strict code. I'd call it... "The Bankrupt Prophecies".
@Zhangar: if that's the case, then the Kalistocrats are doing just that. After all, the main goal of the Prophecies is to gain immortality through material wealth, thus shunning the afterlife. We also know that the Kalistocrats claim their teachings are divorced of the gods, thus granting them immunity to the current age where prophecy is uncertain. This is plenty of reason for Pharasma, the goddess of the afterlife, death, and prophecy, to view the Kalistocrats as arrogantly defying the natural order.
To clarify, merely seeking immortality doesn't count. From Pharasma's perspective, "immortality" is very relative. Being immune to death from natural causes just means you'll die from something weirder or nastier some time down the road.
And Pharasma's as old as the universe. Needing to wait a few tens of thousands of years before you're getting judged doesn't bother her. (Unless you became undead, in which case you fall under her general "all undead must be destroyed" mission statement.)
Rejecting the afterlife doesn't mean seeking immortality in of itself.
Rather you need to die, go to the Boneyard, then reject being judged and becoming a petitioner.
Then there's no point in marut inevitables existing, as their primary goal is the extermination of people seeking to bypass the natural order via unnatural means such as magic.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
There's not a lot of point in Human Resources Managers existing either, but still they exist.
Inevitables don't work for Pharasma...
Inevitables don't work for Pharasma...
This. The inevitables of Axis represent a faction that's completely separate from Pharasma and the psychopomps of the Boneyard.
Then allow me to present another, much more relevant servant of the balance: Moriggnas.
As assassins, morrignas retrieve those seeking to escape inevitability—escaped petitioners, powerful undead, would-be divinities, and other mortals too clever or foolish to die naturally. Many spend years or even decades among mortals gathering information, following leads, and maneuvering ever closer to their often-powerful targets. They are the personal deaths nipping at the heels of mortals audacious enough to live beyond their years.
Pharasma does not merely twiddle her thumbs and wait for the 'inevitable' death by violence. Her servitors take active roles to ensure that when a mortal's time is up, it's up and it's time to go.
I'll concede one thing, though: just because the Kalistrade believes in and hopes for immortality does not mean they are actively acquiring it (although they are attempting to achieve it.) How Pharasma perceives and judges this wholehearted pursuit to avoid her judgment is up for individual interpretation. In the end, it can't be good for their afterlife PR.
That said... would you mind citing your source that states that it is the rejection of judgment that brings about condemnation, Zhangar? The more I think on it, the more I wonder if Pharasma would even let someone have a choice in the matter, especially since her psychopomps, quote, "care little for the histories or personalities of the souls that pass them by, concerned only for the efficient and unvaried processing of each spirit to its final unremarkable eternity. Damnation and paradise are the same to them, as are heroes and villains, and no psychopomp cares one jot for great deeds left undone, other fates hanging in the balance, or bribes worth even a world's ransom," (Bestiary 4, pg 217)
I think you're reading a bit too much intent into the text on Morrignas- their focus is on "escaped petitioners, powerful undead, wannabe deities and other would-be immortals," sure.
But Golarion is lousy with Undead, Sun Orchid Elixir-using life forms, Razmir, Monks and Druids who basically laugh off the ravages of time.Then, you know, there's the whole test of the Starstone potentially bestowing divine immortality.
Suffice to say, the Morrigna seems to be more "inscrutable reasons dictate that THIS person needs to be dead right now" rather than blanket condemnation of such activities as a steady concern- more in the intersection of Pharasma's death and prophecy concerns than just pinwheeling their arms and going "seeking immortality bad!"
For the most part, Pharasma seems to be the sort who just... waits. You'll get to her eventually. Just ask Aroden.
I get the impression that activist psychopomps like the Morrigna are for special cases.
But Golarion is lousy with Undead, Sun Orchid Elixir-using life forms, Razmir, Monks and Druids who basically laugh off the ravages of time.Then, you know, there's the whole test of the Starstone potentially bestowing divine immortality.
All of which are hunted. Some are just too powerful to touch, like Razmir or, better yet, Baba Yaga (though she has fate itself on her side, something the goddess of fate would not deem to interfere with). Others, like monks and druids, stop taking penalties but still die of old age (see: Timeless Body (Ex), Core Rulebook). Yet others are successful, but we never hear about those because the psychopomps aren't obligated to tell us the time of day and indeed they can't be bother with anyone who isn't their charge. As with all hunts, they sometimes succeed, sometimes fail, but never, I presume, do they deem it worth announcing to anyone but their superiors and relevant co-workers that they did either, because as mentioned before, they are only "concerned only for the efficient and unvaried processing of each spirit to its final unremarkable eternity," not to serve the interests of the living.
Allow me to present you an example, though spoilers are ahead for Mummy's Mask:
Suffice to say, the Morrigna seems to be more "inscrutable reasons dictate that THIS person needs to be dead right now" rather than blanket condemnation of such activities as a steady concern- more in the intersection of Pharasma's death and prophecy concerns than just pinwheeling their arms and going "seeking immortality bad!"
From the aforementioned Carrion Crown passage:
Morrignas dedicate their existence to wiping out any forces that circumvent or corrupt the natural cycle of death and judgment.
That seems to be a pretty clear-cut reason that is not in the least bit inscrutable. Immortality is bad because it disrupts the cycle and flow of souls, just as the soul trade and undeath do.
For the most part, Pharasma seems to be the sort who just... waits. You'll get to her eventually. Just ask Aroden.
On the contrary, she's probably the busiest deity in the entire pantheon. I can't quote the entire article, but just read her entry in "Inner Sea Gods" and you'll see that on top of judging every soul in the multiverse, she actively encourages her worshipers to action, shows her dis/favor through omens, etc. Her cold, detached demeanor and seemingly 'passive' role as just the ticket booth at the end of the yellow brick road of life by no means detracts from how unbelievably essential she is not only to the defense against the forces of undeath but the very fabric of the planes themselves.
I get the impression that activist psychopomps like the Morrigna are for special cases.
Show me evidence.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
I strongly recommend reading the River of Souls article in The Pyramid of the Sky Pharaoh. That article goes into some detail as to how the Boneyard works. Interestingly enough, Occult Adventures also has a page or so about the Boneyard.
I'd expect that morrignas have broad discretion as to what they feel warrants their attention.
Someone who's bought a couple thousand extra years with sun orchid elixirs (Artokus) is very different from, say, someone who obtained immortality through the blood sacrifice of an entire city (Sorshen).
From said article:
"In her capacity as the goddess of fate, Pharasma knows which souls are and aren't done with life, including those destined to be to be called back to the Material Plane via magic."
She's okay with souls yo-yoing in and out of the Boneyard, I think she can handle the idea of mortals trying to stave it off forever- especially since she knows when they're supposed to be "done."
Psychopomps, being individuals with consciousness, obviously exercise their own discretion in the execution of their duties, but when every reference to Pharasma's judgments includes an aside about how nothing is set in stone and she makes seemingly weird, random calls every so often? Safe to say not every Morrigna is going to make it a point to hunt down every cretin who thinks he can cheat the reaper by buying longevity potions.
Also- I don't know where you get the idea that she personally judges every soul, when every mention of the Boneyard brings up all the lesser courts that handle the bulk of mortal passings.
The natural cycle you cite is wrapped up in the fates which Pharasma knows of and which she directs her servants to fulfill.
Occult Adventures probably has the article to give it access to players who don't have the adventure path. It's a pretty major piece of information, after all.
Someone who's bought a couple thousand extra years with sun orchid elixirs (Artokus) is very different from, say, someone who obtained immortality through the blood sacrifice of an entire city (Sorshen).
To psychopomps? Not really. "Damnation and paradise are the same to them, as are heroes and villains".
To Pharasma? Still not really. From Inner Sea Gods: "she makes no judgment about the justness of a particular death". She sends them where they're due to go in the afterlife, assuming their immortality was not pre-ordained by her or they didn't try to shirk their time when the psychopomps came knocking (which I do not doubt they would have if they were approached.) Actually, Artokus might be the one who's severely punished out of the two. Mass-murder would condemn you to an evil plane, but that's in line with the cosmic order, but giving not only yourself but OTHER people the means to cheat death by old age? That might earn you a ticket to a painful afterlife even if you're a fundamentally good person or have a god you serve, or even oblivion at the hands of Groetus or the Grave of Souls. Pharasma's judgment is absolute, after all, and no one may contest it once she's given a final verdict.
End of the day, I guess we just have to up and declare "mysterious goddess is mysterious and nebulous." DM discretion and all that.
Bottom line of this whole discussion: it complicates s++& for what would otherwise be a standard open-shut case of "I'm lawful neutral, therefore Axis". Calistria probably doesn't know or understand everything Pharasma looks for in a soul, but she probably figures mudding their devotion to something other than a deity and whose goal is immortality through money can't be favorable for the Kalistocrats.
^And the first 2/3 of this is why Pharasma is one of the members of the Pathfinder Campaign Setting pantheon that I hate the most -- Neutral in name, but actually one of the greatest of its forces for Evil. I hate over-deities on Earth, and I hate them in worlds of legend.
"You can't trust those Neutrals with their non-aligned intentions?"
^Yeah, a mail-sorting machine . . . That is VERY activist and sends out agents to snatch up souls to keep up business. I don't much like Calistria either (Evil labeled as Neutral and all that), but I can appreciate her conspiracy to trick Pharasma and Abadar out of their desired parts of the soul business.
| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
The gods are all businesses trying to get souls, selling ideals and afterlife insurance. Pharasma's kind of like the government: too powerful and necessary to the established economic function for any individual god to really do anything about it save lobby for favors. Urgathoa's that one business that said "screw you, I'm not paying taxes" and invented her own currency with undead, which Pharasma hates because that ain't kosher.
Your gods! I need to adjust the threads on my conspiracy billboard!
Just a minor point....the number of worshipers and souls that gods in Golarion have don't effect their deity power level at all.
Though your theory is still sound because the conspiracy would effect the god's influence on Golarion through mortal agents.
| 2 people marked this as a favorite. |
Honestly, if Calistria did it just to tweak Abadar's nose and make more work for Pharasma, I could see it.
She's capable of being remarkably petty.
| 3 people marked this as a favorite. |
Plus, it was probably fun to do.