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Okay so the point of this thread is purely fun... If you're paranoid enough to have an actual conspiracy theory about this contest seek help.
I'll start with some my more fun and plausible ones:
-Past top 8's write the good joke items knowing they won't win but will give some people pause and there's a secret board somewhere where they laugh at our snark and praise threads. They bet on who will get the most thinly veiled comments/references to their item. Season 8's winner was the popcorn staff.
-The reason we finish by Halloween is so they can run Season 10 after Thanksgiving and season 10 will have completely different rules!
-The random pairings are actually by an increasingly intelligent AI that is testing us.
To channel the creativity for the true superstars: The negativity generated by hundreds of failed attempts must be perpetuated and wrought through hundreds of suffering witnesses.
-There are no living RPG Superstars, they've all been harvested and replaced by human/reptile hybrids genetically designed to be good at human board games.
-The RPGSS HQ is a Legion of Doom-style fortress somewhere in the Atlantic
and one last non-Super Star theory:
-James Jacobs is the mastermind behind 4th Ed Dungeons and Dragons.
Think about it.
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Every 2-3 seasons the blood god demands tribute and his followers take to the contest to make as many blood based items they can think of in an effort to resurrect the careers of all those guys who used to make metal band cd art.
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I'm still working out the details with a set of grainy photographs, newspaper clippings, and postits tacked to the basement wall and connected by multi-colored strands of yarn but...
...I'm pretty sure the Stonecutters are involved. Stonecutters, you ask? "What do they do? What don't they do? They do so many things they never stop. Oh, the things they do, my stars."
In a future adventure path, they're planning to have Abadar send out a champion equipped with all of the most ridiculously OP items created here.
The creator of the virus that will bring on the zombie apocalypse is using RPGSS to see what people's attitudes are towards undead. And blood.
There is a secret Last Place prize where they give you a copy of the core rulebook so you know how the system actually works.
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In a future adventure path, they're planning to have Abadar send out a champion equipped with all of the most ridiculously OP items created here.
The creator of the virus that will bring on the zombie apocalypse is using RPGSS to see what people's attitudes are towards undead. And blood.
There is a secret Last Place prize where they give you a copy of the core rulebook so you know how the system actually works.
It's like a 100-something degrees outside but I'm glad you said that last one cause you just threw out some serious shade
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To channel the creativity for the true superstars: The negativity generated by hundreds of failed attempts must be perpetuated and wrought through hundreds of suffering witnesses.
Every 2-3 seasons the blood god demands tribute and his followers take to the contest to make as many blood based items they can think of in an effort to resurrect the careers of all those guys who used to make metal band cd art.
Oh stop it now, your generous tithes of schadenfreude, fremdschämen, and bitter sehnsucht are enough. Your sweet praise is going to make Him blush.
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The Illuminati actually make working versions of the winner's 1st round Item to increase their power.
The competition is secretly run by intelligent versions of the best joke items, looking for new members to bring into their fold.
Nanites man, nanites, they secretly run everything and they are so small you don't even know it!
The winners all have giant voting cabals and that's why they win. (Its funny cuz some people believe it)
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The winners all have giant voting cabals and that's why they win. (Its funny cuz some people believe it)
Wait...are you saying that one's NOT true?
O_o
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Back in 2007, Paizo accidentally summoned a demon that feeds on imagination.
They plopped it in front of a never ending stream of youtube videos but that wasn't enough to sate its appetite.
So they started this competition. They shovel our items down its throat until its belly is full and distended.
The demon, however, grows more powerful every year. That's why they had to move up the competition to August. Pretty soon, they'll be hosting two RPG Superstars a year. Then three. Then four.
Eventually, with its hunger growing exponentially, all of mankind will be unable to form enough creative material for the demon to feed. It will swallow the universe whole and live for eternity in loneliness.
Thanks Paizo!
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The King In Yellow.
But with, like, magic items.
-Past top 8's write the good joke items knowing they won't win but will give some people pause and there's a secret board somewhere where they laugh at our snark and praise threads. They bet on who will get the most thinly veiled comments/references to their item. Season 8's winner was the popcorn staff.
Nothing to see here, nothing to see here. Move along.
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The King In Yellow.
But with, like, magic items.
Yes he is super sneaky and shows up everywhere
[Rust Cole voice] Thang about the Superstar competition is that we're all just on this rock spinning and orbiting around an insignificant orb of fire. Gosh I like Lincolns. [/Rust Cole voice]
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Once you hit Champion voter, your item is auto-culled...
If, for some reason, you hit Champion voter but did not enter an item, are culled.
The top 32 must fight to the death, Hunger Games-style.
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Once you hit Champion voter, your item is auto-culled...
I KNEW IT!
The top 32 must fight to the death, Hunger Games-style.
I'd buy that for a dollar.
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The contestants begin the next round on pedestals encircling the (magic) item-filled corpse of a Huge crysmal.
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Formatting errors can't melt Superstar dreams.
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The top 32 must fight to the death, Hunger Games-style.
Are they forced to only use the item they submitted?
The top 32 must fight to the death, Hunger Games-style.Are they forced to only use the item they submitted?
I'd prefer the Battle Royale edition as well.
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I'm really James Jacobs' body implanted with SKR's brain!
*kidding*
:P
All threads eventually devolve into puns because of a certain notorious Kobold god from 3.5!
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All threads eventually devolve into puns because of a certain notorious Kobold god from 3.5!
Are you saying we should koBOLDly go, etc., etc.?
RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32
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Champion Voter Season 6, Champion Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Champion Voter Season 9
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Paizo is secretly working with a nearby college on a study of obsessive compulsive behaviors.
On that note, I just realized I forgot to eat breakfast this morning due to voting...
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The text of the Top 100 is compiled into a set of lyrics performed by a Vocaloid, then the judges play through it on Audiosurf to determine which ones "sound the best".
Edit: It's called playtesting.
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The King In Yellow.
But with, like, magic items.
Yes he is super sneaky and shows up everywhere
[Rust Cole voice] Thang about the Superstar competition is that we're all just on this rock spinning and orbiting around an insignificant orb of fire. Gosh I like Lincolns. [/Rust Cole voice]
{side-eyes little GM_Solspiral figure made from a Mountain Dew can} Great, now I'm hearing voices.
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The reason we finish by Halloween is so they can run Season 10 after Thanksgiving and season 10 will have completely different rules!
I can squash this theory officially. More big contests in a row would be very D:
Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9
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The text of the Top 100 is compiled into a set of lyrics performed by a Vocaloid, then the judges play through it on Audiosurf to determine which ones "sound the best".
Edit: It's called playtesting.
Well that would be ok...as long as it was Kagamine Rin. I don't want Luka or Miku anywhere near my item.
<shudders> And definitely not Kaito.
RPG Superstar 2015 Top 16
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Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka Rusty Ironpants
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I heard that the RPGSS staff has been infiltrated by robots!
The text of the Top 100 is compiled into a set of lyrics performed by a Vocaloid, then the judges play through it on Audiosurf to determine which ones "sound the best".
Edit: It's called playtesting.
Well that would be ok...as long as it was Kagamine Rin. I don't want Luka or Miku anywhere near my item.
<shudders> And definitely not Kaito.
It's Gumi.
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Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9
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It's Gumi.The text of the Top 100 is compiled into a set of lyrics performed by a Vocaloid, then the judges play through it on Audiosurf to determine which ones "sound the best".
Edit: It's called playtesting.
Well that would be ok...as long as it was Kagamine Rin. I don't want Luka or Miku anywhere near my item.
<shudders> And definitely not Kaito.
Deal.
At least we avoided Ia.
Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9
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The text of the Top 100 is compiled into a set of lyrics performed by a Vocaloid, then the judges play through it on Audiosurf to determine which ones "sound the best".
Edit: It's called playtesting.
Surprisingly enough, this has indeed been done before. Harking back to the year 2009, here is the Official RPG Superstar Season 2 Anthem.
The reason we finish by Halloween is so they can run Season 10 after Thanksgiving and season 10 will have completely different rules!I can squash this theory officially. More big contests in a row would be very D:
Maybe they intend to replace the burnt out "staff." Think about it.
;)
Paizo devs have a popcorn reel of submissions that were DQ'd before public voting even began
Paizo devs have a popcorn reel of submissions that were DQ'd before public voting even began
Thanks to the Popcorn staff they made after last years contest they never run out.
The reason we finish by Halloween is so they can run Season 10 after Thanksgiving and season 10 will have completely different rules!I can squash this theory officially. More big contests in a row would be very D:
Or maybe your higher ups "forgot" to tell you they will be replacing you with self-aware AI that evolved in the voting server to deal with...
Okay so the point of this thread is purely fun... If you're paranoid enough to have an actual conspiracy theory about this contest seek help.
(...)
-The random pairings are actually by an increasingly intelligent AI that is testing us.
Wait... I thought that those are supposed to be imagined conspiracy theories, not facts?!