Chris Shaeffer RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Hodge Podge |
Robert Lazzaretti Cartographer |
Decent looking map reference here upon first glance.
There is a compass rose and scale present on the map.
Good use of page space.
I like this map idea, the colors get a bit heavy and dark, but still fairly easy to see whats going on.
Unique location idea, I like it.
I do recommend this map to progress to round 3
Crystal Frasier Contributor |
The Good
Another dungeon inside a dead monster. I love these things!
This is a very clean and well-labeled map turnover. I could easily turn this into a final map with no additional information.
It has a scale, key, and compass.
There's obviously some story going on here, and I want to know what it is.
The shapes are very organic and believable.
The Bad
Some of the encounter areas within the treant are a little tight for a full party
My Judgement
A fun idea, implemented and communicated well. I recommend this entry for advancement to the next round.
Owen K. C. Stephens Modules Overlord |
Drawing from my blog on maps, and the rules for the round, I’ll judge the maps on a number of questions.
Is It a Full Page Map?
Very much so! I especially appreciate that things of interest (a rift, a camp) are placed in space the treant crossing itself does not fill.
Does The Map Have A Compass Rose and Scale? Are They Used Well?
Yes, and yes.
Is The Map A Place I Want To Adventure?
Oh boy it is! I can just imagine the stories of the fight over the cracked rift of the giant treant bridge while avoiding falling through to the raging river below! That's a story people will tell over and over. It's a great choice for a map -- it would be hard to convey this properly any other way.
Is the Map Clear?
Yes, which is impressive considering how much is going on.
Is the Map Detailed?
Yes, which is impressive considering how much is going on.
Is the Map Imaginative?
It's a giant treant bridge, with a crack in it. A giant treant bridge is already a cool idea. Making it cracked and imperfect somehow makes it that much better.
I Strongly Do recommend this map to proceed to round 3.
John Bennett RPG Superstar 2011 Top 8 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8 aka John Benbo |
RJGrady |
This is just great. While the treant itself is not a huge area, it looks cool, and the presence of the humanoid camp tells me this is an interesting place. It's not precisely a combat map, nor really just an area map; it's an environment map. It gives me what I need for the PCs to wander around and do stuff.
Lucus Palosaari Star Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 |
On my first run through of all the maps, this one stood out to me. I liked it before I realized it was supposed to represent a super-sized treant (by my guess, it was 150+ feet tall and 40'+ wide in the middle?) For a half a minute that detracted from it, but then I realized I really just wanted a good reason for why this colossal treant was killed right here, and why its body is being used as an impromptu bridge, etc. I'd set this as my third favorite map of the round.
James Casey RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8 aka Jrcmarine |
Maurice de Mare RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka Darkjoy |
frank gori RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 aka GM_Solspiral |
Challenge: Is this map difficult to execute? Does it in my opinion demonstrate the characteristics of a Superstar designer?
Technique: Did the designer show some skill and consideration in the choices made on the map. Are the words used in the key wise choices that add to the overall utility of the map?
Utility: Can a GM/cartographer make sense of the map and make immediate use of it?
Overall:[b] I'll rate the Map as an A for strong recommends B for weak recommends C on the bubble D for weak rejects F for Do not recommends
Challenge: You made a dead creature that is also a structure, if that isn't superstar enough I don't know what is.
Technique: I'd publish this as is... This is excellent work with excellent use of color, artistry, and scale.
Utility: I'd print this and hang it on a wall, I would not try to draw this for fear of not doing this jsutice. I will use this in a game for sure.
Overall: +A for me as in this is bar-none my favorite map in the competition. I cannot endorse it more highly and I'm jealous as hell of the designer's talent... In fact vote it down maybe I can hire him cheaper if he doesn't make it to round 3 :P
Winterwalker Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8 |
Jacob W. Michaels RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka motteditor |
Another monster's body as location, which is a common trope, but you've mixed it up nicely. You're not just adventuring IN the body, but also using it as a bridge. I like that twist.
And, oh man, that poor treant. I feel bad for him. It's like the Giving Tree where something went horribly wrong. This tells a story and I want to know what it is.
With a fairy ring, a humanoid camp and a flaming rift, something strange happened here and I think the PCs could certainly want to know what that is.
Now, I don't think it's perfect. Like in Leviathan's End, there's actually a limited amount you can do in the dungeon, though that doesn't seem as egregious here. More problematic, I feel like the scale's almost too small. By having all this stuff within 300 feet, I feel like the adventurers would have to deal with everything in a single day instead of having it spread out a little more and making it take a week or so to find out everything there is to learn about this place.
Still, that's quibbling a bit. I expect to vote for this map and hope you bring it in the monster round.
Jeff Lee |
That poor treant. Vermin nesting in his head, a mad fey living in his leg, and those humanoids are probably hacking wood off of his corpse to keep their fire going. The indignity of it all...
There's a lot going on in this map that I really like. I agree with Jacob that everything feels a bit scrunched together, at too small a scale. I'm a little disappointed at the generality of the labeling. "Predator," "humanoid," and "fey" leave things vague. Why not go with specifics like "arumvorax," "hobgoblins" and "redcap?" Though I suppose if you're supplying the map that someone else may turn into an encounter in a later round, you're doing that person a favor and leaving them room for development. That said, there's enough of a story in this map that I'd be inspired to write up encounters for it.
Good job, and best of luck to you in this round.
Jacob W. Michaels RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka motteditor |
I'm a little disappointed at the generality of the labeling. "Predator," "humanoid," and "fey" leave things vague. Why not go with specifics like "arumvorax," "hobgoblins" and "redcap?" Though I suppose if you're supplying the map that someone else may turn into an encounter in a later round, you're doing that person a favor and leaving them room for development. That said, there's enough of a story in this map that I'd be inspired to write up encounters for it.
That's how I took it. It also means it could be scaled for different CRs.
Mark Griffin RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 8 , Dedicated Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Mark D Griffin |
My favorite thing: People using a treant for an improvised bridge is a cool idea.
Other things I like: You managed to convey the inside of the treant with multiple different types of encounters inside.
My least favorite thing(s): I'm about to nitpick a little bit here, but it's okay I still like this map
- the face is entirely too human and it bothers me. I see a nose, mouth, teeth (maybe), ear, chin, and eyes all about where they would be on my face. I like my treants a little less human looking.
-I don't see this as the kind of place I'd come back to more than once. It seems like a dynamic place to come upon on the way from one place to another. Given that, I think you've done too much here. I'm just going to cross bridge, so I see no reason to interact with that fairy ring or get that predator out of his cave or inspect that rift.
-The inside is a bit claustrophobic, and with all the vermin nesting inside it I think I'd rather crawl on top of it than go inside to cross the river
-The river should be wider, too easy to cross without using the treant at all.
-I imagine scaling this treant from the outside it not too hard, so I don't buy that chest being secret. I could climb up his arm and look down and see it super easy.
Will I vote for it: I realize I just said a lot of negative things about this map, but I liked it enough to spend a lot of time thinking about it. I will be voting for this map because it get's my 5th spot.
PFW1-K1 |
3 people marked this as a favorite. |
BEEP BOOP for more information PLEASE SEE
Treants, trees who are also people; fey, creatures with close ties to the First World; and humanoids, another word for fl̸̫͈̤ͅͅe̲̪̬̯͎̰ͅs̛h̲b͚̠͔̱͉̱̳a͓̯̩g͍s̫͓͎͉̼̱BZZT bipedal upright lifeforms that I would never accidentally kill!! under any circumsţ̞͕a̹̺̰̗͕n͎̜͓̗̻̝c͇͇͍̗e̢s̞̘̜͓͉̰whirrrrrCLICK.
Feros Champion Voter Season 6, Champion Voter Season 7, Champion Voter Season 8, Champion Voter Season 9 |
This is really great! There is a lot going on here, but it all is very clear and easily understood. This massive treant died and now his corpse is being used as both a dwelling and a bridge across a small chasm. The devastation on one side of the chasm conflicts with the forest and fairy ring on the other, adding another intriguing story element.
There is very little to complain about. In my mind the best of the lot. I will definitely be voting for this entry.
Crystal Malarsky RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 4 , Star Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Snowblossom |
KhaosKontrol Star Voter Season 8 |
That crack looks like it's right on the treant's... oh... oh, wow... how unfortunate.
Overall, a clever design. It's set apart from other "inside a big creature" encounters because it feels like more than just a map drawn in a big creature. If this was just a bridge it would definitely be less eye-catching.
Why the treant's heart would still be around is beyond me especially considering this thing is already inhabited / passed through, but hey.
The "flaming rift" in the lower right corner feels tacked on and unnecessary. The rest is interesting enough to be worth a session's time.
Solid entry! Good luck!
Jaragil Marathon Voter Season 8 |
The face of that treant. Cracks me up every time. Definitely could have used a bit more inhuman design to avoid hilarity.
Aside from that, this is probably my second favourite map. Very cool idea, clear layout, nice use of space and as a whole this will make for a memorable encounter. I also like that you're not too specific with the encounters, allowing for the idea to shine above others.
To nitpick a little, I'd say that the walls in the treant don't have to be so thick. Making them thinner would give the party more room to maneuver and allow for more varied encounters within the treant, which is the main thing in this map. The rift is also superfluous and prevents me from using this map in certain settings. Now I'd have to somehow explain that rift or photoshop it out. The rest of the elements fit into many different settings and themes.
Nevertheless, a fantastic map and a clear indicator of your ingenuity and skill. Definitely worth voting for.
Owen K. C. Stephens Modules Overlord |
1 person marked this as a favorite. |
Official Round 2 Note: On Map Resolution
We’ve had some comments on legibility of smaller type on the maps, and the contestants are (by the rules of the contest), not allowed to clarify anything, so I want to make a general statement about maps and resolution.
When we required all contestants to present maps at a specific dpi and size, we did so because in past years we’ve had some issues with maps (for the encounter round) being sent to us in different sizes, resolutions, and dpi, making it difficult to give them all a high-quality presentation for the contest. We found that asking for a higher dpi than we’ll use in the end allowed us to create a standard of presentation that kept all images crisp and clean. For encounter-round maps, this has worked well.
Unfortunately, since this round requires all text be provided on the maps themselves, many contestants used the dpi and size standards we required as the basis for making sure their text is clear, and otherwise tried to keep words as small as possible so as to not clutter their maps. This was done in the (reasonable) belief that the maps should look good at the size we asked for, rather than in any different size we might present on our website. When resized for smaller, high-quality images, this can result in words that aren’t clearly legible.
We’ve made a change to rescale everything to the higher end of maximum image size for uploaded images for all maps that were entered this round. This should allow for better legibility for voters when selecting their favorite maps to advance in the contest. It is our fault that this process was not properly communicated to our contestants, so consider this when adjusting or finalizing your selections.
Obviously, we’ll explain what is going to happen to the images of maps, and how to allow for it, more clearly in future rounds (and future contests). My apologies to any contestant with a map that has suffered as a result of how we handled scaling in this round.
James Raine RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Star Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8 aka FaxCelestis |
Thunderfrog Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 |
The face of that treant. Cracks me up every time. Definitely could have used a bit more inhuman design to avoid hilarity.
Aside from that, this is probably my second favourite map. Very cool idea, clear layout, nice use of space and as a whole this will make for a memorable encounter. I also like that you're not too specific with the encounters, allowing for the idea to shine above others.
To nitpick a little, I'd say that the walls in the treant don't have to be so thick. Making them thinner would give the party more room to maneuver and allow for more varied encounters within the treant, which is the main thing in this map. The rift is also superfluous and prevents me from using this map in certain settings. Now I'd have to somehow explain that rift or photoshop it out. The rest of the elements fit into many different settings and themes.
Nevertheless, a fantastic map and a clear indicator of your ingenuity and skill. Definitely worth voting for.
Haha, it looks like he's a Bart Simpson Treant eating a green skittle and cleaning out his ears at the same time.
That said, this is still in my top 3 maps. I loved the creativity of this author. I loved his frog armor too. I might have a favorite designer at this point. =D
Browman Dedicated Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 |
Mark Nordheim RPG Superstar 2014 Top 16, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Dedicated Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Dedicated Voter Season 9 aka Morphemic |
Here are my ratings for this map:
First Look: A
Really great looking map!
Interest Level of Location: A
There is a ton of interesting stuff to explore here.
Tactical Depth: C
Really cramped quarters. No room for tactical maneuvering. The stream crossing itself is the most interesting part of the map from a tactical perspective.
Adventure Potential: A
This map would make a very fun segment of an adventure.
Clarity: B
The different colors of floor inside the tree confuse me, and I could use some elevation indicators around the stream. Otherwise good.
Logic: C
There's just too much stuff crammed into a tiny space. Not only is it unrealistic, but all the encounters would run together in actual play.
Overall: B
Grumpus RPG Superstar 2014 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 |
Raynulf Star Voter Season 8 |
First off: Congratulations on making Round 2, and the best of luck in the votes!
Coolness: Do I look at this, and want to use it in a game? Does it provoke wonder or amazement? Does it hold potential for interesting encounters, adventures or roleplay? How much mileage does this map have in it?
Usability: How usable is this for me as a GM (being that GMs are actually the primary audience of most maps)? Is the legend clear and in logical order for play? Does it give me enough information to easily visualize the parts and wax poetic about the varied locations? Does it have the necessary details for me to run with it on the fly, or will it involve a lot of improvisation? Does it have any glaring oddities that stop me mid-breath to go "what the hell is that?!"?
Craftsmanship: Is it clear, legible and containing all the necessary bits and bobs? Does it make good use of the space? Is the scale appropriate for the detail (and visa versa)?
(I suppose you could also call them "Creativity, Functionality and Skill", but I like my terms better :P).
Coolness: A-
- Positive: The hollowed body of an enormous treant, bridging the narrow ravine between lush, fey-filled forests and scorched wasteland: Damn cool. The map is intricate, with a lot of fuel for imagination and adventure, and you can almost smell the woody decay mixed with the acrid stench of smoke.
- Negative: The overwhelming flatness of the terrain is a little offputting for a natural location; I'd expect a slope towards the stream on either side, and some undergrowth or similar terrain effects mixed in with the trees and ash. The big thing is the flaming rift; It doesn't make sense, and if I announced it out loud, it's weirdness would draw the attention from the actual centerpiece of the map.
- Verdict: Awesome concept, but the rift detracts more than it adds: A-
Usability: C+
- Positive: I've got labels indicating intent, a mixture of interior and exterior terrain and defined cues for encounters.
- Negative: It's really cramped for the encounter variation; the vermin nest is a few seconds walk from the camp, as is the fairy ring, and unless there is some form of congenial agreement with each to leave each other alone, it makes it hard to play without it seeming contrived. How deep is the stream (can it be forded, or does it require swimming)? The flaming rift is 10ft away from the ramp up the southern cliff, meaning it will affect play, and per my earlier comments, detract more than it adds in my opinion. It is also not clear whether the treant interior has a roof; i.e. is it a cutaway or a realistic depiction, because this will affect play. Are the trees intended to be bushy from the ground up and thus count as heavy undergrowth or impassible, or are they tall, and thus count as trees as per Forest terrain? How high is the treant (because players will climb on top of it)? Lastly, the 5ft boulders blocking off the arm from the head to form a 'secret area' is creative, but flawed given that characters can probably see over them and definitely climb over them.
- Verdict: It is gorgeous to look at, but in my opinion has sacrificed too much functionality in favor of aesthetics. Definitely usable (and cool enough to want to use), but I'll need to put my improvisation hat on to patch the oversights: C+
Craftsmanship: A
- Positive: Very clear and makes good use of the space available, with a concise key and perfect scale for an encounter map. This is a beautiful piece of work.
- Negative: The bottom-right corner needed a little more creativity than was shown (the rift feels like filler to avoid empty space), and the treant really needs to have clarification on whether the interior is open to the sky or not (cartographers can't read minds) – it looks like the intent is to be a cross section but it could easily be misinterpreted.
- Verdict: Other than a couple of niggling details, this is very well put together and presented: A
Overall: B+
Kiel Howell RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32 , Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Marathon Voter Season 8, Marathon Voter Season 9 aka theheadkase |
I am critiquing this without having read others' first:
Colorful and pretty professional looking at first glance.
Is this a fallen treant as a bridge?! Cool, I wonder if it is partly alive and if I could necromancy it to my control.
Vermin's nest, mad fey, human camp, fairy ring, and a flaming rift with corpses around it...interesting.
Oooo the heart of the treant.
River with stones and "predator's cave" (whatever that is).
Some secret door and chest. Feels a little weird, who would build that into a dead treant, has it been dead that long?
Overall, I quite like this map, but I'm not sure if I will vote for it. It is good, clear, and has interesting elements, and there's definitely a story here. But I must see the rest of the maps first to make a decision, this is bordering on my last vote at the moment.
Garrick Williams RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 16 , Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8 aka Cyrad |
I already have a soft spot for dungeons inside of giant creatures. Making it a treant that functions as a bridge strikes me as pure genius. Even better is that you fleshed out the area around it with interesting features, such as a camp, a monster cave, and a fissure. This looks like a fun place to adventure.
However, I'm very sad the interior rooms are really small and don't have any details to make them interesting encounter locations.
Lady Firedove Star Voter Season 6 |
Chris Shaeffer RPG Superstar 2015 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2013 Top 32, RPG Superstar 2012 Top 16 , Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7, Star Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9 aka Hodge Podge |
Hi everyone! I damn near killed myself making this, but I am still blown away by the positive response. Thank you so much. :]
Let me tell you all a story.
Just kidding, there is no story, and that is the point! I wanted folks to be able use this map as a "plug and play" sort of experience. Jeff Lee and Jacob Michaels had it right: the general labeling allows the story and CR to be flexible so that it could fit into most campaigns. But I did want elements of a story, and thought of some for each point of interest on the map.
The Treant
He sure is a big feller. Treants don't normally grow this large, and I can't help but think that it has something to do with that special heart of his. The vines grow down from the still-living heart down into the water to slake its thirst.
He probably would have been the guardian of the entire forest. I imagine him passing away while regarding that small tree near his hand - the last thing he saw. Perhaps he died transplanting it to the other side in an attempt to save it. But what caused the fire that brought him down?
The Mad Fey's Dwelling
This could be an nasty fey (or a troll, I guess) who pesters those who cross the bridge. Or perhaps he is diabolical, and wants the treant's heart for some reason? He might even be mad but misunderstood, defending the treant's remains from those who would despoil it. Could even be a dryad, if they're allowed to be connected to treants in your campaign.
After submission, I was thinking that if he was mechanically inclined he could have installed traps throughout the treant's innards, especially ones that would push travelers through the crack into the river, which would sweep them towards the predator's cave.
The Predator's Cave
Could be a bear or something more exotic. If it were something that could scale cliffs it would be extra dangerous.
The Humanoid Camp
This could be a band of orcs guarding the crossing, or a merchant caravan that can't get through because of the vermin. Maybe even a necromancer cabal after the treant's heart.
Maybe whoever is camped here caused the devastation across the river? Although, they would have had to be camped there a long time, because I was intending the time period to be a few months or years after the treant's demise. Never hammered that down precisely.
The Fairy Ring
If you were to find fey here, would they be guarding the treant's remains, or hunting the intruding humanoids? What might their relation to the mad fey be? Do they support or oppose him?
The Flaming Rift
What is this? A volcano? The deep effects of meteor impact? A portal to the elemental plane of fire or the burning hells? Whatever it is, it is either the cause or a recent effect of the devastation, and may even be threatening to eventually dam up or redirect the river with the molten rock flowing out of the cracks. That could be problematic for the treant heart, which gains nourishment from the river.
The Vermin's Nest
This is just the perfect place to set up a nice, cozy home for yourself. Plenty of squishy fleshbags pass through or over the this log to keep a family fed.
Could be spiders, giant moths, or something more exotic.
Now wasn't that a nice story?
Now then, on to responses to your critiques (in order of prevalence).
I do think the rift fits the theme of the map, but if I had more time I would probably shrink its size and significance. It may be just an offshoot of a larger rift or impact crater further to the south.
Also yes, this is a cutaway. I see now how that could have been made clearer by having a different color and/or texture in the cutaway walls, because right now they are the same color as the exterior parts that aren't cut away, like the left arm.
Overall, I was pleased with my map, despite the problems. I do plan on revising it eventually. Adding in some visual details, changing some names ("Treant's Heart" room -> "Heartwood Chamber"), and making the heart chamber harder to get to (by shifting the entrance down to the south so the crack becomes an obstacle), in addition to my comments above. So keep an eye out!
Thanks again, everyone. :]