The most annoying gamer in the world.


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Shadow Lodge

Ok, we've heard about the most intersting man in the world so what about the most annoying gamer in the world? Yes, I know. There are already a bunch of annoying player/gm threads out there for venting. Try to keep all your annoying gamer venting in the form of the most interesting man in the world Dos Equis commercials.

When he rolls a handful of dice...the GM asks, "what is your action?"

When his character has to prepare spells, he's always prepared... the right one.


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He always has a rules interpretation for feats and they are always wrong.


I wish my spell casting players were prepared with the right one. But noooo....even after over 25 years of gaming when it's their turn they're still looking up which spell to cast or what action to use. This makes them the most annoying gamers in the world!

Silver Crusade

1 person marked this as a favorite.

When in Foreign lands...he makes them speak Common.

Sovereign Court

Shows up to day one and says "I rolled a Drow noble."


Pan wrote:
Shows up to day one and says "I rolled a Drow noble."

Funny you should say that...


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Always does annoying voices for their character; an obnoxiously high-pitched and nasally voice for the gnome, a gravelly version of the gnome voice for the goblin, etc.

I am that player. I regret nothing.

Shadow Lodge

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When you tell him not to drink your milk...he drinks it.


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"I don't always play a Paladin...

... but when I do, s/he's an obnoxious prig."

Shadow Lodge

When he says, "Make a will save." You roll for yourself so as not to punch him in the face.


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When it's his turn, he takes a good ten minutes till he know what he wants to do.


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When he rolls to hit...he has to do the math to figure out his bonus to hit every time.

When he hits...he has to figure out the math for his damage bonus every time

When it is his turn...than he figures out what he is doing.

Sovereign Court

He read the feat description on the feats table and bases his rules interpretation on that, not on the actual rule.

Grand Lodge

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber

He advertises his game as Pathfinder...but uses 3.5.


He will argue a rules point for hours with no need to actually read the WHOLE DAMN PARAGRAPH!!!

sorry...I have to learn to let it go...he has stopped doing that mostly now...

Silver Crusade

Plays nothing but summoner/paladin combos.

Liberty's Edge

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After reading all of these posts, I see y'all are talking about me. :-P

Seriously though, the most annoying gamer is either:

He claims he's been playing since the days of the red box, but still doesn't know what saving throws are or which die is the d20

or

He opted for febreeze instead of a shower


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Adventure Path, Starfinder Roleplaying Game Subscriber

He pays more attention to his iPhone app game than any session he has been in, combined.

Liberty's Edge

KestrelZ wrote:
He pays more attention to his iPhone app game than any session he has been in, combined.

OMG! That one drives me absolutely bonkers!

Here's another:

Always plays a rogue who always steals from the party, doesn't understand why the other players get irritated.


He's the most vocal and picky about the pizza order... but puts in the least amount of money to pay for it.

Prepares for his turn... by having a loud and long-winded rules discussion about it with the GM during everyone else's turn leading up to it.

Liberty's Edge RPG Superstar 2013 Top 16

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"I don't always talk over the GM when he's reading box text... no wait, actually, I do."

Liberty's Edge

When rolling % dice, waits to see the results before saying what die is the 10s die.


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Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber
The Shining Fool wrote:
He opted for febreeze instead of a shower

Febreeze is preferable to Axe Body Spray.


When my players do that, I require they flip a coin, assigning tens to heads or tails, to see which die is which. Cures them of that habit very quickly—after the requisite whining, of course.


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber

After asking whether 3PP rules are in play, and being told "no," shows up with a cyborg lionfolk psion/white necromancer with a +3 chainsword of extreme gore. He then whines like petulant toddler when you tell him to make a different character.


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Haladir wrote:
The Shining Fool wrote:
He opted for febreeze instead of a shower
Febreeze is preferable to using Axe Body Spray.

Especially when they want your female NPCs to react as if it's an Axe commercial.

Sovereign Court

I have a long standing rule. No shower? No game. Bad breath is also unacceptable unless it is a medical condition.


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber

Thinking of gamers and personal hygine issues made me think of this story from 25 years ago.

(Note: Names have been changed to protect the guilty.)

Grand Lodge

Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber
Jaelithe wrote:
When my players do that, I require they flip a coin, assigning tens to heads or tails, to see which die is which. Cures them of that habit very quickly—after the requisite whining, of course.

A great idea, but I never have a coin to flip... :(

Silver Crusade

Pathfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

...When you ask him if his d20 game allows take 10 he says yes.. Then follows up with "You still have to roll... no freebies here".
He is the most annoying DM in the world...

Yes, I played under this guy at a con, STARGATE d20. Uhg.


Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Card Game Subscriber
TriOmegaZero wrote:
Jaelithe wrote:
When my players do that, I require they flip a coin, assigning tens to heads or tails, to see which die is which. Cures them of that habit very quickly—after the requisite whining, of course.
A great idea, but I never have a coin to flip... :(

I always rule that the white dice is the tenths and the other one the units and that 1) I get to choose the tenths if there is no white dice and 2) whoever rolls two white dice pays the pizza and is cursed for the rest of the evening.

Grand Lodge

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Pathfinder Adventure, Rulebook Subscriber; Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber
The Shining Fool wrote:

After reading all of these posts, I see y'all are talking about me. :-P

You'd drink a man's milk after he told you not to?

You monster.

Sovereign Court

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A guy who keeps insisting that I let him play a kitsune summoner (I don't do anthropomorphic animals or summoners in my setting)
And brings a kitsune summoner to the game and then whines and complains because he has to roll up a new character.


Pathfinder Starfinder Adventure Path Subscriber

I had to tell a kid at PFS this weekend that literally every interruption he made for 45 minutes of gameplay would be sufficient for me to declare his character wantonly evil if I were the GM.

The GM gave me a knowing look and nod.

Seriously, this kid was interrupting a diplomatic discussion with things like "I cut off her finger." He wanted to torture a helpless street thug out of frustration that he didn't get to kill anything during combat.


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He gets handed an interesting character concept based on what he said he wanted to play and then proceeds to do nothing with it because he can't roleplay even after over four years of experience in multiple systems.

He gets help from the entire party on what spells, feats, and class features to pick and then proceeds to be useless dead weight in combat.

He frequently gets lost in the relatively simple plot and forgets characters' names despite having a sheet with the names and plot importance of almost every character in the story right in front of his face.

He is...

The Most Annoying Gamer in the World.

"I don't always play tabletop games but when I do, I... wait what are doing here again?"

Sovereign Court

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I'm not often perplexed by how I should react to a thread... but when I am, this is it.

Sovereign Court

Serisan wrote:

I had to tell a kid at PFS this weekend that literally every interruption he made for 45 minutes of gameplay would be sufficient for me to declare his character wantonly evil if I were the GM.

The GM gave me a knowing look and nod.

Seriously, this kid was interrupting a diplomatic discussion with things like "I cut off her finger." He wanted to torture a helpless street thug out of frustration that he didn't get to kill anything during combat.

Yeah I have met this annoying player before in PFS as well.


Hama wrote:

A guy who keeps insisting that I let him play a kitsune summoner (I don't do anthropomorphic animals or summoners in my setting)

And brings a kitsune summoner to the game and then whines and complains because he has to roll up a new character.

Well to be fair Kitsunes are shapechangers....


When he adds his damage dice, its in short mental bursts...

"I do 34 points... No wait... 38 points... No wait... 40 points... No, no... 42. Yea, 42." (you move on) "Wait, I forgot to add the extra damage that my weapon does..."


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Randarak wrote:
"I do 34 points... No wait... 38 points... No wait... 40 points... No, no... 42. Yea, 42." (you move on) "Wait, I forgot to add the extra damage that my weapon does..."

There's at least one person in every session who does this throughout the game. And it's not always the same guy.

Silver Crusade RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32

DungeonmasterCal wrote:
Randarak wrote:
"I do 34 points... No wait... 38 points... No wait... 40 points... No, no... 42. Yea, 42." (you move on) "Wait, I forgot to add the extra damage that my weapon does..."
There's at least one person in every session who does this throughout the game. And it's not always the same guy.

Speedy arithmetic is not my strong suit. :c


Pathfinder Adventure Path, Lost Omens, Rulebook Subscriber

[After two other players have taken their turn, and the monsters are attacking...]

"Oh, wait! I forgot that I was flanking! I really hit AC 25 before! Does that hit?"

Shadow Lodge

2 people marked this as a favorite.
Haladir wrote:

[After two other players have taken their turn, and the monsters are attacking...]

"Oh, wait! I forgot that I was flanking! I really hit AC 25 before! Does that hit?"

I think I'll start playing this when that happens.

Sovereign Court

mechaPoet wrote:
DungeonmasterCal wrote:
Randarak wrote:
"I do 34 points... No wait... 38 points... No wait... 40 points... No, no... 42. Yea, 42." (you move on) "Wait, I forgot to add the extra damage that my weapon does..."
There's at least one person in every session who does this throughout the game. And it's not always the same guy.
Speedy arithmetic is not my strong suit. :c

That is why you add up everything beforehand. And make results for various buffs that you commonly use.

There is no excuse really.


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But that would make too much sense.

I always try to that very thing, and if I do happen to overlook a damage bonus I just let it slide. The players don't know any different. I just make sure to remember it next time.

Dark Archive

The most annoying gamer in the world doesn't have to bring his character sheet to the game - since he has his character memorized.

-------

In a game that awards xp for defeating monsters - the most annoying gamer in the world opens a door to a room infested with thousands of tiny mutated cockroaches - throws a grenade inside, closes the door and then giddily asks.....

"HOW MUCH XP DO I GET?!?!!!11!!!!!!1?"

Dark Archive

TMAG - The guy rolls to hit advises I got a 23 does that hit?

DM - No

TMAG - Wait 25

DM - No

TMAG - Wait 27

....yes and how do you keep adding +2?


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I never realized that 'incremental corrections to an attack roll as a means to find the ac of the creature" might be considered a disreputable trick. It is kind of dirty pool now that I think about it. My players have indeed used this. Dirty metagaming buggers.

Sovereign Court

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That is why I accept only the first number they say. If they then correct themselves, it's too late. Should have paid attention.


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He doesn't always play a new character, but when he does, he has no actual clue how it works.

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