Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7
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Upstart
I really like this. I'm not a person who plays a lot of non melee characters, but the sheer pizazz of this character makes me think it would be a blast for RP.
My only concern is the loss of mutagen really downgrades the Alchemists combat capabilities, so much that I'm afraid you might have hand-cuffed your archetype to early level players, because even with a Intel of 20, you're talking about Fort saves for a decently built fighter, barbarian or paladin that don't need much better than a 10 on the roll to save against. Though concealment would be really good with a dip into rogue.
Upstart Aesthete (Alchemist)
This is really cool, love the Pitax tie and I may well steal this when I get to the appropriate time in Kingmaker...
Here goes my submission as sent ~
Aldori Rascal (Rogue)
Most Aldori exiles take pride on their deadly swordplay and enjoy the formal insults prior to a duel, the Aldori rascal on the other hand, takes pride on her ability to infuriate and fluster opponents prior to and during a duel, enjoying the swordplay as a side-dish.
Craven Strike (Ex): An Aldori rascal focuses her ability to deal sneak attack damage against foes she has angered, embarrassed or shaken. When she makes a sneak attack against an opponent who is demoralized by her Intimidate skill check or under the effect of the Antagonize feat, she uses d8s to roll damage instead of d6s. For sneak attacks against all other opponents, she uses d4s instead of d6s. This ability is identical in all other ways to sneak attack, and supplements that ability.
Nuisance (Ex): At 1st level, an Aldori rascal learns to exploit her natural talents at mocking other creatures. Every day she gains a pool of mockery points equal to 1/2 her Aldori rascal level (minimum 1) + her charisma modifier. These points refresh at the start of each day. Before making a Bluff skill check to deceive someone or spread a rumor with the rumormonger rogue talent, she can expend 1 mockery point, and use an Intimidate skill check instead, forcing them to believe her or spread the rumor. This ability replaces trapfinding.
Antagonize: At 2nd level, an Aldori rascal gains Antagonize as a bonus feat. This ability replaces evasion.
Harassment (Ex): A 3rd level Aldori rascal can expend 1 mockery point before she makes an Intimidate skill check to demoralize an opponent, or infuriate a foe with the Antagonize feat, extending the duration of the effect by 1 additional round. For every six levels beyond 3rd, the effect lasts 1 additional round, to a maximum of 3 additional rounds at 15th level. This ability replaces trap sense.
Frustrate (Ex): At 8th level, an Aldori rascal can expend 2 mockery points before she makes an Intimidate skill check to infuriate a foe with Antagonize. If successful, the foe is Flat-footed for the duration of the Antagonize feat and provokes an attack of opportunity from the Aldori rascal when making a melee attack against her, so long as the creature is within her reach. Frustrate does not allow an Aldori rascal to make more than one attack for a given opportunity. This ability replaces improved uncanny dodge.
Rogue Talents: The following rogue talents complement the Aldori rascal archetype: befuddling strike, guileful polyglot, offensive defense, slow reactions, and strong impression.
Advanced Rogue Talents: The following advanced rogue talents complement the Aldori rascar archetype: crippling strike, defensive roll, knock-out blow, and rumormonger.
Star Voter Season 6
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Uringen Sentinel (Paladin)
With parts of their city at risk of being whisked away, the citizens of Uringen needed something unwavering within their walls and the Uringen sentinel represents that drive. The sentinel pledges his life to Uringen proper (and more specifically the Unstuck District). This dedication gives him some measure of control over effects meant to sever this bond, but at the cost of his restorative power.
Unstuck Resolve (Su): Beginning at 3rd level, a Uringen sentinel can consume one use of his lay on hands to grant himself a morale bonus equal to his class level plus his Charisma bonus (if any) on all rolls against effects that would knock him prone or forcibly move him, to include combat maneuvers, mind-affecting or teleportation effects. By choosing to consume additional uses of lay on hands, he can affect one adjacent ally per use expended. In addition, anyone under the effect of this ability becomes distorted and all attacks against them suffer a 20% miss chance as if they were under the effect of blur.
At 8th level, the sentinel need only expend one additional use of his lay on hands in order to affect all adjacent allies with this ability.
At 13th level, the sentinel can grant himself immunity to these movement effects, but must expend two additional uses of his lay on hands to pass the morale bonus and distortion effect onto his allies. The distortion that surrounds those under this effect now grants a 50% miss chance as if under the effect of displacement.
At 18th level, whenever targeted by one of these effects, the sentinel may choose to end this ability as an immediate action to reverse the effect back against his foe as if the sentinel had been the one to initiate the effect. This does not provoke attacks of opportunity and the sentinel must still roll the appropriate check, but adds the morale bonus as a bonus to the check. The sentinel’s target is treated as flat-footed for all effects related to this ability.
This ability lasts a number of rounds per day equal to the amount of bonus granted. As with lay on hands, this ability is a standard action, unless the paladin targets himself, in which case it is a swift action.
This ability replaces the paladin’s mercy class feature.
Ageless Sentry (Ex): At 20th level, the Uringen sentinel no longer ages, remaining in his current age category forever. If he should die via another means, he spontaneously comes back to life (as true resurrection) 24 hours later.. This ability replaces holy champion.
Ok so I guess I need to work on my writng chops...
The idea was getting the benefits of both a familiar and a bonded item whcih is restricted to weapon, ring, wand, or amulet. The familiar and item are the same and can magically shift back and forth from an item to a familiar.
For example if you chose viper as familiar and dagger as bonded object you could throw the dagger into someone then it could turn into the viper and get a bonus to bite. Alternately lets say you chose a hawk and an amulet, the hawk could fly over to your neck and turn back into an amulet.
I think that was clear, Solspiral. I think what wasn't clear is HOW. Why is an animal becoming an object. It's just a strange concept, I think. Again, I could see if you have the animal's essence going into the item, but that's not what you've got going on.
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Here's a start to these.
Fine print: I'm far from an expert on mechanics. These are just my general impressions.
OK, the RK tie-in definitely feels tacked on, though I like how you did it. I think making Hymbria part of the first sentence would have made it feel more integrated.
Adding in the dimensional agility feat tree makes sense -- though it does give me bad flashbacks to my monster last year. Still, part of me says it's so obvious that you should take that chain that it almost feels like it should be brought in some other way to me, I think. Maybe a power that lets you use the feat power with just far step, so you could still decide if you want to take the whole feat tree for other abilities? Otherwise, I think you'll get every one of these feeling a bit the same.
Following step's interesting -- I could see a smart NPC -- one who's had time to study a waystrider's tactics -- using this to lure him into a trap.
I like escaping step too.
All in all, I think it seems like a nice strong take. I know everyone else loved it, but the red adder magus felt like an odd fit to me, since I don't really see mixing poison into my sword and spell warrior. This archetype fits in more with how I think I'd want to see a magus changed.
Turin, your Neidan alchemist is clocking in at 878 words. I think I’m going to focus on your cultist.
Which is interesting. I love the area you’re playing in, probably in part because my RRR players just got to Candlemere. I was surprised none of the official entries really tried to play on the Kingmaker Adventure Path, since it seemed like an obvious area to me to meddle in.
I like a lot of your intro text: “the masses of blind sheep ignorantly bleating along in their miserable lives” is wonderfully evocative.
I think I like your central conceit – swapping channel energy for two domain spells. I’m not sure that’s balanced, but my gut feeling is it’s correct. I don’t think I like as much that they can then spontaneously cast cure and inflict spells as it seems an odd choice.
I think limiting domains (if I’m reading it right) to trickery is a problem. Allow for some choice. My bigger problem is I can’t quite figure out WHY your central conceit, which again I think is pretty cool, allows two domain spells. I’m just not seeing the connection to the Old Ones, which I associate more with driving folks mad in their dealings with them. I’m also not sure why you’ve upped the skill ranks per level.
Interesting. I have to admit, I didn’t quite get River out of this until you pointed it out, though at that point, I can see it.
I liked the raised hackles ability, probably my favorite.
I think where it falls apart a little is it doesn’t really tie together. Smell fear is a neat ability, but nothing builds off it. I was expecting something that would let me take advantage of those things I found and it never quite came together for me. Instead, I have another ability that makes me shaken frequently instead of fatigued, which I’m not sure isn’t a big boost for this barbarian, since shaken’s a lesser effect than fatigued.
Interesting name, though I don’t think it’s super evocative. I leap to the conclusion I’m getting a jack of all trades sort of character.
I think you’re playing around with some neat mechanics, but I’ll defer to others on the balance. The inspired courage seems like it needs a typed bonus. Is there anything that prevents me from taking this multiple times?
You’ve got some style issues that are throwing me. Feats should be capitalized. That’s important so I know what you’re talking about with Gunsmithing and Rapid Reload.
I’m also not quite clear what you mean by alchemical munitions? I can use my bombs as bullets? I *think* that’s what you mean, but it could also be things like tanglefoot bags and alchemist’s fire. I like the hurtling blast power.
However, I think it indicates you need to clear up the writing a little more. Having to use examples indicates your actual stated power is confusing. I’d work on making that more clear.
I like the idea of combining the alchemist and gunslinger. They feel like natural fits together, and I’m actually playing a multiclassed character like that in a S&S campaign. I think this would be an archetype I’d use, but again, I want a little more clarity on what you’re trying to do with it.
Also, the name’s not really evocative. It’s just … gunner.
Great name, DQ. This name makes me want to play this archetype.
I can’t decide if I like the pick-your-own mechanic for weapon proficiencies and class skills. I haven’t seen anyone do that (though don’t read a lot of archetypes) but guess it makes each character more customizable. I’m also not sure I like a siege weapon being part of this. That doesn’t feel very barbarian to me.
Ambush sense feels like a big power up from trap sense to me (though again, I don’t claim to be an expert at mechanics). I like the power, though.
I like inspiring warrior a lot. It feels like something this type of class should do. It does break Sean’s rule, swapping a defensive ability for an offensive one, but I’d totally steal the concept for the very slightly similar archetype I haven’t posted yet.
Oooh, I like secular authority. Very neat power, though I suspect it’s probably more limited than the domain ability. Nice thinking outside the box with it.
But then I’m left with nothing until level 20, which is really disappointing. There’re tons of things to change in inquisitors, so only really getting two (plus proficiencies) has me wanting more.
Doesn’t really feel very intrinsically tied into RK, but it didn’t really have to. This could certainly fit there.
Whoa. I like the idea of the boasts. That’s a fun system and very imaginative. That said, I think doubling the remaining rage rounds per day seems REALLY powerful. It also makes it some that’s far more effective if you use it at the start of the day vs. the end, and scales really badly. If I’m a 10th level barbarian, I can end up with basically endless rage easily. In part because there are no real requirements to my opponent. What’s to stop me from boasting to a squirrel. Or, heck, have a henchman who I boast that I’ll do first blood with first thing every morning?
Oo, exciting! I'mma review all of these, but let me get mine out there first :P
Wyvern Tamer (Cavalier)
Many rulers claim the lands of the River Kingdoms, but the wyverns own the skies. Nesting in the Tors of Levenies amidst the rolling wilds of the Kamelands, wyverns mark a territory of their own: one where they are kings and everyone else is prey. Taming these terrors requires cunning and ruthlessness, two things the folk of the River Kingdoms have in spades.
Class Skills: A wyvern tamer gains Listen (Wis), Spot (Wis), and Stealth (Dex) as class skills.
Weapon and Armor Proficiency: A wyvern tamer gains proficiency with whips.
Ambush Charge (Ex): At 1st level, a wyvern tamer can perform an ambush charge, which deals 1d6 extra precision damage against flatfooted opponents, with an additional +1d6 precision damage every three levels thereafter. Additionally, his mount can share his Stealth check results. This replaces challenge.
Dragonlore (Ex): At 1st level, a wyvern tamer learns Draconic and treats dragons as suitable mounts. This replaces his order.
Ruthless Whip (Ex): At 2nd level, a wyvern tamer learns the Whip Mastery feat (Ultimate Combat), and deals double damage with whips when riding a charging mount. As a free action he can whip his mount (maximum damage) for a +5 morale bonus to Ride checks for one round.
Wyvern Mount (Ex): At 8th level, a wyvern tamer obtains the service of a wyvern. Some tamers bribe, others threaten, but the result's the same. Customarily, one feeds the wyvern their previous mount as a show of good faith. The wyvern becomes his new mount, albeit at a -7 effective druid level. While mounted, he can make Ride checks in place of his wyvern's Fly checks.
Aerial Combatant (Ex): At 9th level and every three levels thereafter, a wyvern tamer learns one of the following aerial gambits. Gambits require his wyvern to attempt a Fly check using the specified action type. These replace demanding challenge.
- Bolt from the Blue (Swift, DC 50): This gambit is used before a charge. The entire charge is treated as a ranged attack for sniping, as long as it ends in concealment or cover.
- Dead Drop (Full-Round, DC 25): This special charge can only travel straight down. The target of the charge is treated as flat-footed.
- Flutter (Immediate, DC 40): This gambit moves the wyvern 5ft., but only such that it grants her rider an attack of opportunity against a target he otherwise couldn't reach.
- Sudden Sting (Immediate, DC 30): The wyvern can use this gambit after a successful ambush charge to make an immediate sting attack against the same target.
- Swooping Charge (Swift, DC 20): After a successful charge attack, this gambit allows the wyvern to change her angle of attack to up to 45 degrees upwards.
Hey, look, I made yet another Uringen archetype. I think that I might have missed the precise flavor of what is happening to the town since it is not really time traveling but only blinking into and out of existence. The main problem is that this is mostly just a generic chronomancer which I branded for Uringen to fit the twist.
Uringen Chronologist (Wizard)
For those wizards obsessed with the study and manipulation of time, there is no better place to journey than the temporally displaced town of Uringen. By experimenting with the strange magical effects there, some of those wizards can learn to weave similar effects into their magic, shifting time from place to place, stealing time from the future and even merging past, present and future.
Arcane School: An Uringen chronologist may not select either Transmutation or Divination as prohibited schools. These two schools of magic are too vital to the study of time to be neglected by the erstwhile chronologist.
Lend Time (Su): At 5th level, the Uringen chronologist gains the ability to effectively shift time from location to location. As a swift action, he may choose to be affected as by the spell slow with no save allowed. While the Uringen chronologist is under this effect, he may designate a single ally within 60ft. This ally gains the benefit of the spell haste. This ability may be used for up to ten rounds per day. These rounds need not be consecutive.
This ability replaces the 5th level Wizard Bonus Feat.
Borrow Time (Su): At 10th level, the Uringen chronologist learns to steal small moments of time from his own future and use those moments to interrupt the prresent. He may cast a spell with a casting time of one standard action or less as an immediate action. After casting this spell, he takes 1d6 points of nonlethal damage per level of the spell cast and is staggered for one round as the timeline rebounds into its proper place. This ability is useable once per day at 10th level and one additional time per day for every four levels thereafter.
This ability replaces the 10th level Wizard Bonus Feat.
Other-Time Aspect (Sp): At 15th level, whenever the Uringen chronologist prepares spells, he may choose to draw upon the potential of the past, present or future. This acts as the spell threefold aspect except that once chosen, the aspect cannot be changed until the Uringen chronologist prepares spells again, at which point he may choose another aspect or no aspect at all.
This ability replaces the addition of a new 5th-level spell slot to the character’s spells per day— from this point on, the Uringen chronologist has one fewer 5th level spell slot than other wizards.
Here's a start to these.
Fine print: I'm far from an expert on mechanics. These are just my general impressions.
** spoiler omitted **
** spoiler omitted **...
Happy to reply in appreciation of the feedback.
Neidan alchemist is an expansion of the internal alchemist concept to what I understand as the pinnacle of internal alchemy from Taoism: Enlightened Immortality. The immortality capstones in the game thusfar are sorely lacking. This is my attempt to express this as a purely alchemical source rather than the excellent material on the subject done by the Jade Oath 3pp line. My hope is that this hits close to the mark.
Candlemere Cultist adds parts of the Trickery domain, a higher skill point allowance and great er domain spell access in trade for reduced combat capability. Not all of the Old Cults are centered around madness. Most are long term generational affairs - in Golarion they're very much underground. Channel energy in massive bursts of power decidedly does not fit in with these guys. Had I my druthers, these guys would drop to d6 HD/poor BAB which is something archetypes are expressly forbidden from. They work from behind the scenes with lies and stealth to attain their aims (depending upon the particular cult) while blending in with the locals. The intent is to capture the benefits of the expanded scope of knowledge. The cure/inflict ability is to reflect that ability to deceive Inquisitors and those of their ilk by being able to pose closer to arcane casters that have similar power (bards especially).
Again, profuse thanks for the feedback!
I knew uringen would be popular this year.
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Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7
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Thanks Jacob,
I just put the first draft up. The final version which wasn't properly formatted and was over word count (which I would have spent the three days editting lol) changed penalties and rewards around.
I was looking into just giving them their bonuses for the rest of the day vs giving them a penalty an incurable shaken effect for the rest of the day.
As far as the type of opponent, I never even thought of that, I just assumed no DM would let them declare their boast against a squirrel lol. Something to keep in mind.
I think Uringen's one of the more flavorful areas of the RK. I'm not surprised it inspired a lot of people. I certainly considered it; just couldn't figure out something I liked.
RPG Superstar 2010 Top 32, 2011 Top 16
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Marathon Voter Season 6, Marathon Voter Season 7, Dedicated Voter Season 8, Star Voter Season 9
aka Boxhead
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Fairly rough draft, but it would have looked something like this:
Outsea Aquanaut (Alchemist)
Some alchemists raised in the uniquely aquatic realm of Outsea have grown resentful at the discrimination against air-breathers, thus developing a distinctive style of alchemy that allows landlubbers to function underwater, at least temporarily.
Class Skills: An Outsea Aquanaut gains Swim (Str) as a class skill.
Steam Bomb (Su): An Outsea Aquanaut can use his bombs underwater, including throwing them from air into water. When a bomb travels through water, its range increment is reduced to 5 feet. All of his bombs (above or below water) have their damage reduced by one die step (i.e., 1d6 becomes 1d4). This ability otherwise functions as and replaces the bomb class feature.
Deep Sea Mutagen (Su): An Outsea Aquanaut can create a special type of mutagen that grants him the ability to function better in aquatic settings. Instead of altering his ability scores and natural armor, this mutagen causes him to gain webbed fingers and toes, as well as gill slits in his neck. This grants an effect equivalent to water breathing and gives him a +8 bonus to Swim checks. However, his ability to breathe air is compromised while using this mutagen. After 1 minute out of water, he becomes fatigued until he spends at least 1 round under water. This ability otherwise functions as and replaces the mutagen class feature.
Hard Water (Su): At 2nd level, an Outsea Aquanaut can use some the same magic that allowed the original settlers of Outsea to cross dry land. As a standard action, he can cause existing water to gain a stiff consistency that can create bridges or walls. He can affect a 5 foot by 5 foot by 1 inch section of water per alchemist level, causing it to harden to a substance with the same hardness, hit points and general consistency as wood. This area must be continuous and cannot be moved. This effect lasts for 1 round per alchemist level. This ability replaces poison use and poison resistance.
Walking Tide (Su): At 6th level, an Outsea Aquanaut use a standard action to move an area of hard water up to 10 feet. This moves the entire rea as a mass. This ability replaces swift poisoning.
Marching Tide (Su): At 10th level, an Outsea Aquanaut using walking tide can move the area up to 30 feet. This ability replaces poison immunity.
Discoveries: The following discoveries complement the Outsea Aquanaut: confusion bomb, feral mutagen, madness bomb and strafe bomb.
I would have put more time into the name, especially (I was leaning toward Aquamancer instead of aquanaut) and I'm not convinced about the balance, per se.
Re: the Branthlend witch:
Agreed it definitely needs a line linking levels of the Branthlend witch to the vengeance incarnate ability. I thought I'd added that, but perhaps it got lost somewhere.
Hampered Casting: Yowza! If I read the archetype as a whole, I get this. If I read this first though, it could turn me off of reading the rest. Maybe put this in after Vengeance Incarnate so people don't get discouraged from reading the rest upfront.
Reasonable idea certainly. It seems like most of the examples had the depowering right at the start but I don't have strong feelings about this.
Vengeance Incarnate (Su): Ooooo. Self evolution points. This. Is. Awesome. Eidolons and Summoners are a tough class to build properly, but this seems straightforward and so cool. 4 + Int seems a bit much, especially as she gains 2 more per X levels.
Thanks. This was the big swing, obviously. As noted, I spent a lot of time wondering about duration on this. I thought eight rounds of combat at first level (if you have an 18 Int, and you're likely not to if you're using point buy as it's a fairly MAD archetype) didn't seem excessive. I feel like that's a couple combats and especially in a dungeon, you're likely to see more than that.
Dying Wrath (Su): Again, cool and flavorful. This ability is spot-on themewise. Mechanically, again I like the sticking point that they have to be aware.
Thanks. I thought this was a slightly strange one, considering it only works when you get knocked out, but I thought the flavor was perfect.
Grand Hexes: The following grand hex complements the scorned witch archetype: death curse, dire prophecy, eternal slumber.
Methinks you had a different name :)
Whoops. *blush* That's embarrassing.
Overall, this is super cool. Mechanically and thematically. Makes me want to play this witch.
Again, thanks.
This is a very, very rough draft. I abandoned it when the Top 32 were revealed. Any thoughts would be appreciated. I hadn't rounded out the abilities yet. I felt like it still needed a lot of work.
The Moonshine Golem was potentially going to be the monster, depending on the twist(which I know now would have killed it). I'd envisioned a Golem that was less durable ( a Junk Golem, if you will) with a breath weapon/flamethrower powered by a tank of moonshine. Alas, it will make its way to my homebrew.
Backwater Builder (Universalist)
Part engineer and part moonshiner, the Backwater Builder is a tough and individualistic wizard who specializes in potion making, construction and eventually, the building of Moonshine Golems from cast-offs and junk. They are resourceful scroungers who prefer the freedom and independence of the River Kingdoms to the order and conformity of other lands.
Brew Potion: At first level, the Backwater Builder gains the Brew Potion feat. This replaces the Scribe Scroll feat at 1st Level.
Class Skills: A Backwater Builder gains Craft:Brewing(Int) in addition to the Craft a wizard already receives. This replaces the Fly(Dex) skill.
(Ex) Jury-rigger/Scrounger: At 1st level the Backwater Builder gains a +2 to all Knowledge/Engineering checks. At 10th level, this bonus becomes +4. In addition she pays 20% less on materials for potions, structures, scrolls, wondrous items. This replaces the Universalist Hand of the Apprentice ability.
(Ex) Crackerjack Creator: at 8th level the Backwater Builder can take the Craft Construct Feat, needing only the Craft Wondrous Item feat or the Craft Magic Arms and Armor Feat as a prerequisite. If they have both, they gain a 20% discount on the material and spell component cost of the construct. The Golem has -2 hit dice than its usual type when the discount is used. The Backwater Builder may choose to pay full price for full hit dice. This replaces the Universalist's Metamagic Mastery they receive at 8th level.
Isaac, whenever I see your name, I wonder if we're doing parallel design again. There was an item that was similar to mine in this year's competition and I spent the whole time wondering if it was yours. : )
I like powerful swimmer but I'm less sure about favored terrain. Seems like it's violating Sean's advice. Yeah, you're giving two terrains, but you're telling your players what they have to take, when those are probably the terrains they'd take anyway.
Hunter's bond seems to do the same thing though you do make the animal a touch more powerful for that limitation.
Underwater fredom fits your theme, but I think your mechanics are a bit odd. Why not just say he can move and attack normally for x rounds per day? Invoking a free action and one-round limit seems like unnecessary choices.
Watery ambush is also a nice effect.
I think this has some nice ideas, but may have suffred (as some of the Top 32 did) by being TOO tied to the water. Maybe that's a problem all the Outsea characters would have (well, the brinebinder didn't and I think that'd have let it advance if Ziv hadn't somehow managed to bury his main power), wher eyou're only going to play them if you're in a very specific type of campaign.
I like it being a Galtan. I thought playing around with the surrounding kingdoms was a fertile area to consider.
I like your new performances. Very interesting. I think normally replacing inspire courage especially is a choice most people would just reject, but I could see people taking this and acting as a debuffer instead of a buffer.
More alchemists. Obviously a popular area, and one that was very successful in the competition.
I don't know that I like cursed crafting, though. That feels very much like an NPC ability. Am I really going to worry about giving cursed items to enemies that I'm expecting to kill momentarily? Furthermore, can I safely handle the cursed item? It doesn't say I can.
OK, think that's it for me tonight.
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i'll most likely regret saying this, but i'm going to try to critique every archetype that gets posted here...
While praise is nice, criticism is useful. None of this is meant personally, but is only meant to help strengthen your designing skills in the future.
Thrice Bound- i like your idea but the execution needs work. it would probably work better if you let the wizard get both bonds (with no transformation) then added either a free improved familiar feat or a bump to the item around 8th (players choice, can't be changed). the companion one is problematic... you need to define how you bond (what type of action does it take? how long does it last? what do you have to do to change it?), and it's far too powerful to replace just a feat- being able to use monstrous physique iv (just for example) on the party fighter or barbarian is huge.
Waystrider- i probably would have voted for this one. i like the idea and think you did a pretty good job balancing it. my one complaint is how fast they can get into/through the DAg feat chain (DAg and assualt at 5th, dervish at 9th...)- it may have been better if instead of making a blanket 'counts as dimension door' thing you replaced new arcana at specific levels with the feats or abilities similar to them.
Branthlend Witch- wow, that is bold. i applaud your risk taking but i would have trouble voting for this one. i think your balance might be a little off... not necessarily compared to a standard witch but you've created a way for a smart fighter/ranger/etc to take a quick dip (2 levels, only lose 1 BAB and 4hp) and pick up 3 natural attacks and pounce! that's not really my main objection though- i think your idea is clever but, for me, you've really moved beyond what an archetype can do into alternate class territory.
Neidan Alchemist- that is borderline an alternate class. more importantly its directly derived from someone else' work. that is not superstar. your other idea seems like it has an interesting concept but obviously hasn't been fleshed out (also, why 5 skill points? no class has an odd number of skill points, that's just weird and off-putting)
Spirit-vexed Barbarian- i like raised hackles. the tic thing seems odd... i don't care for the whole will save mechanic- it slows down play, makes the problem worse for some than others, and ensures that at higher levels it's no longer relevant (if that's what you were going for, just have the penalty decrease over time). there's a feat (i think its for orcs/half-orcs) that let's you smell fear- you should have used that instead (the whole detect thoughts thing really muddies the water, and makes fear too subjective- stick to defined terms like "anyone suffering from a fear effect" or stop after "shaken, frightened, or panicked"). contortion is interesting but it should really scale with your level like damage reduction does (maybe use the amount of DR you would have had as the bonus).
The Jack- an interesting starting point... it reminds me a bit of the chameleon from 3.5 but limited by who you're with. it looks like they'd all be day long buffs... if you replace all the musical abilities what will bards do when they have enough rounds to mimic everyone and have rounds leftover? or when they're traveling alone?
Gunner- the first archetype i sketched out after making my item was a firearm-alchemist. i ditched it right away when they revealed the twist. yours is interesting but i feel like its a bit sloppy- i might be a little bit more critical because i built one though. rapid reload is too good to get just for poison use, and you could have saved a lot of word count (and tightened up your mechanics) but using/giving the explosive missile discovery.
Warlord- this is pretty decent work. it seems pretty well balanced and has a clear theme (though i'm not familiar enough with RK to see much tie-in). the weight reduction thing is kind of sloppy- it's far too arbitrary. you would have been better off just having a static bonus to str for determining carrying capacity, or steal the mechanic from the pathfinder chronicler's deep pockets ability.
Avid Skeptic- i appreciate what you're trying to accomplish. the secular authority power is interesting, but it seems like you haven't changed very much for a divine casting class that's now anti-divine. i really don't like the capstone ability- a 'suppress all divine abilities' power is cool but having it permanent and not reversible is totally broken (so if you get lucky against the 20th level high priest of Gorum, what? they just hire someone new cause he's screwed? worse, what happens when the pc cleric runs into one of these guys? sorry everyone, i need to make a new 18th level character, this one can't ever cast spells again...)
well, that's all i have time for right now. my archetype is handwritten on a legal pad somewhere, but i'll post it when i get a chance (its a ranger, directly tied to the 6 freedoms- so it would have been in some crowded design space)- that way you can all 'return the favor'.
Neidan alchemist was never meant for Superstar. Candlemere Cultist is supposed to be weird.;-) Thanks for the feedback!
Cursed Peddler (Alchemist):
More alchemists. Obviously a popular area, and one that was very successful in the competition.
I don't know that I like cursed crafting, though. That feels very much like an NPC ability. Am I really going to worry about giving cursed items to enemies that I'm expecting to kill momentarily? Furthermore, can I safely handle the cursed item? It doesn't say I can
Thanks for the feedback! I didn't realize Alchemists would be so popular!
You are right on Cursed Crafting. I had thought about it being NPC like but I also thought it was an underdeveloped area. I guess i had visions of using the compulsion aspect and the debuff aspect to make combat easier.
And I had the word count so I totally should have mentioned it being safe to handle. Although I do like the idea that a crafty cursed Crafter would build in something only they know about...
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Thanks for the feedback, P33J and Solspiral! I'm glad you like my Upstart; it was a random idea that just sort of popped into my head out of nowhere when I was reading up on different regions in the River Kingdoms, and nothing else I could come up with seemed as interesting.
I agree that Alchemist's Vermillion isn't as strong as a Mutagen, especially considering that there's no real way to improve it over time, but I really wanted some kind of magic paint to be at the core of the archetype, and I was determined to avoid making it anything like Marvelous Pigments. Plus, I think the concept best fits a bomb-throwing specialist, who would hopefully not be hindered too much by the lack of a mutagen.
Here are some quick thoughts on a few of the other archetypes I've seen here:
My biggest problem with this archetype, however, is the lack of fluff; I get no sense of who these Wizards are or what their place is in the world at large. Even the name seems vague and generic, and doesn't really make sense until you get the Companion Bond feature at 15th level, which doesn't really seem to fit conceptually with the other two features of the archetype.
Still, I'm impressed that you decided to take on the challenge of making an archetype for the Wizard, a class without many "fixed" features to replace and very few archetypes in publication. Although it does replace some of the features granted by a specialty school the archetype clearly isn't a new school in disguise, and I feel that the replacement features are more elegantly integrated with the core class than the features of some of the published Wizard archetypes I've seen.
It's somewhat hard for me to judge Vengeance Incarnate, which is obviously the core of this archetype, but I do think it may be at least a bit overpowered. The Natural Armor bonus is pretty impressive, but not necessarily out of line with what a mutagen-focused Alchemist might be able to get. The bonus on attack and damage rolls actually puts the Branthlend Witch a little ahead of the 3/4 BaB classes in terms of her ability to hit with weapons or natural attacks (assuming my math is correct), but at first blush that doesn't seem to unreasonable since her spellcasting looks roughly analogous to that of a Paladin or Ranger.
However, while this Witch's casting level may be hampered, and while she may not get her spellcasting until 5th level, she will quickly outstrip a similarly-leveled Paladin or Ranger in terms of casting ability. Furthermore, the vengeance pool seems like it could potentially be at least as useful as most of the features those classes get, and the Branthlend Witch gets her normal hexes on top of that.
Nevertheless, it's a really creative and surprising take on a Witch archetype. I honestly wouldn't know where to tweak it to bring it more in line with the base classes, since it doesn't work quite like any of them. That it comes fairly close to being balanced is a pretty amazing feat in and of itself, and I would probably have voted for this archetype if you had been in the top 32.
Behold my Conquests looks a little wonky as well; I'm not sure I can think of any published class ability that actually takes the total CR of an encounter into account. It would probably make more sense to use the hit dice of the most powerful hostile creature, or the total hit dice of all opponents, or some such. Conceptually, making it a Knowledge (History) roll doesn't make much sense to me, either; it seems like a Bluff roll might make more sense, but that could just be me.
All that being said, I would really love to see a revised version of this archetype. Barbarians can be a bit boring in play, and giving them a mechanic that lets them gamble bonuses and penalties on their performance in combat is a really inspired idea, especially considering that their class abilities are already so tied to their self-confidence and emotional state.
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I'll cheat a little and use my very first draft, which is over word count but contains an ability that I found interesting, though I had to cut it in the next version. You'll have to put up with the head-hurting first sentence though.
Unknown Knight (Cavalier)
Although his fighting spirit is strong, his honor as bright or domineering spirit as black as those of any cavalier, his family, though of good breeding, may be exiled or disgraced, or the unknown knight himself pursued by murderous enemies or accused of dishonor or felonious acts. The knight may instead be of common birth and have earned by brave deeds a place as squire to an older cavalier, a mentor once experienced in war but now almost as obscure as himself. In constant hope of restoration to his rightful status, the unknown knight hides his identity and forges his destiny in wild border marches or foreign lands, developing abilities that befit him to succeed in adverse conditions.
Class Skills:
An unknown knight adds Appraise and Survival, but does not gain Diplomacy, as class skills.
Robber Knight (Sp): As a move action, an unknown knight can examine an item that he can see within 30 feet for arcane design or traces of occult energies. On a successful Appraise check (DC 20), he discerns its magical properties, if any, as if he had viewed the item for three rounds using detect magic, and can identify its function using Spellcraft if in his possession. The unknown knight can examine one item per day, plus an additional item (with the same or a different action) for each eight levels. This ability replaces the skills granted by his order.
Trail-Claimer (Ex): From 3rd level, the unknown knight and his mount may charge in a line that is not straight, provided their path always progresses towards the opponent and does not pass through any square impeding movement or containing a creature. This ability replaces cavalier's charge.
Covered Escutcheon (Ex): By keeping on his person a token depicting his personal coat of arms, an unknown knight and his mount receive a +3 morale bonus on saving throws against fear and a +1 morale bonus on attack rolls made as part of a charge. At 10th level, and every 5 levels thereafter, these bonuses increase by +1. At 14th level, the unknown knight and his mount also gain a +3 morale bonus on saving throws against charm and compulsion effects, and the unknown knight can spend a standard action to clutch his personal token, gaining an additional saving throw at the original DC against any one spell or effect in place upon him. The unknown knight may give any distinctive item to one other person, granting him the same bonuses on saving throws if he can see the unknown knight within 100 feet. This ability replaces banner and greater banner. An unknown knight may decide at any time to acquire the banner and greater banner abilities at their normal class level and lose all effects of covered escutcheon by raising and displaying his banner as a full-round action. Once made, this choice is permanent and irrevocable.
Ford-Holder (Ex): An unknown knight of 9th level and his mount may charge through up to chest-deep mud or water despite impediment to their movement. This ability replaces greater tactician.
_So to be fair, here is draft 11 of my archetype as it existed before I found out I didn't make the top 32. I won't defend my design decisions yet since the superstars didn't get to. The template is a part of my submission and word count.
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449 - words
Mechanists blend the super-science of the Silver Mountain with magic. Exiled by the Technic League who feared their power, the Mechanists moved their practice to The bordering River Kingdoms. Finding kinship with outlaws and exiles, Mechanists often hire themselves off to pirate crews.
Class Skills: The mechanist gains Disable Device as a class skill.
Mechanical Genius (Ex): A mechanist uses Intelligence, rather than Charisma, to determine all class features and effects relating to the summoner class, such as the Spells and Summon Monster class features.
Mecha Eidolon: At 1st level the summoner's Eidolon becomes enhanced by the Summoner's blending of conjuration and super-science. The Eidolon gains the mechanized template.
This replaces Life Link as well as the Eidolon's Evasion, Devotion, and Improved Evasion.
Automaton Summoner (Su): At 1st level Creatures summoned by the mechanist's summon monster spells and spell-like abilities gain the mechanized template if they would normally gain the celestial or fiendish template.
The Mechanist removes elementals, and outsiders from the lists of what he can summon with his Summon Monster spell-like ability, adding the following to those lists:
Summon Monster: Clockwork Spy**.
Summon Monster II: Animated Object (Small).
Summon Monster III: Clockwork Servant**.
Summon Monster IV: Animated Object (Medium).
Summon Monster V: Animated Object (Large), Clockwork Soldier**, Gearsman Robot†.
Summon Monster VI: Animated Object (Huge).
Summon Monster VII: Alchemical Golem*, Animated Object (Gargantuan).
Summon Monster VIII: Animated Object (Colossal), Myrmidon Robot†.
Summon Monster IX: Clockwork Leviathan**, Iron Golem.
* Bestiary 2
** Bestiary 3
† Inner Sea Bestiary
Annihilator Class Allies (Su): At 19th level, a Mechanist adds Adamantine Golem*, Annihilator Robot†, and Clockwork Goliath** to the list of creatures he can summon with his Summon Monster spell-like ability.
Mechanized creatures dwell in Axis, their living bodies made partially or entirely out of component parts. Mechanized creatures are summoned by the summon monster spells of a Mechanist
A mechanized creature's CR increases by +1 only if the base creature has 5 or more HD. A mechanized creature's quick and rebuild rules are the same.
__Rebuild Rules:__Defensive Abilities: gains Mecha-Resiliance (Ex) resistance or immunity to Mind affecting effects, necromancy effects, paralysis, poison, and stun effects as noted on the table; gains Para-constructed (Ex) For the purposes of effects targeting creatures by type (such as a ranger's favored enemy and bane weapons), this creature counts as both it's own type (such as animal, humanoid (giant), or outsider) and construct.; A mechanized creature gains Constructed (Ex) (see inevitable subtype, Bestiary2, page 307) if the base creature has 11 or more HD; Weaknesses Vulnerable to Electricity.
Hit Dice__________Mecha-resiliance_________________Hardness______Special_______ _______
__1-4_______________+4_________________________---_________Para-constructed _______
__5-10______________+8_________________________5__________Indefatigable____ ______
__11+______________----_________________________10_________Constructed_____ _____
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Avid Skeptic (Inquisitor)
Secular Authority (Su) : At 1st level, the avid skeptic has the ability to suppress certain divine spells for a number of rounds equal to her inquisitor level (minimum 1). As a swift action, she can create a personal barrier centered on her self that acts as a counter against the bane, bless, and sanctuary spells. This ability does not dispel these spells, but it also does not allow enemies to gain the benefits of these spells against the avid skeptic. These rounds do not have to be consecutive and maintaining the barrier is a free action.
At 5th level, she adds consecrate and desecrate to the list of spells this ability can counter (at 11th level, she adds hallow and unhallow).
At 8th level, she can extend this barrier 10-ft. feet from her to aid her allies (and then 20-ft. at 15th level).
This only functions while the avid skeptic is conscious, not if she is unconscious or dead. Similar spells may be countered with GM permission. An avid skeptic can not have a domain, even from another class. This ability replaces domain.
That's funny. I made several attempts to get something very much like this to work as a wondrous item (a book), but then decided that it was better suited for an Inquisitor archetype. If I'd made it through, I'd have had something along these lines!
forgot to include that Mechanist is a Summoner Archetype
Ok this is a very abstact idea I was working on. Over all game mechanics this dreaded idea has never been revealled because it is at the heart an evil concept. Therefore my idea was to provide a Archetype option for NPC's or characters DM's allow to play the Archetype. Keep in mind this is extensive and I am giving it to you as I have it written. This thing started small but because a monster as it grew (no pun intended). Feel free to do what you will with it. Hopefully you will enjoy the idea as it is at its core sinister and untouched.
**The Ravagers**
Barbarian Archetype
The typical Barbarian knows well about the savagery of the Ravagers. They are the hounds of the darkness and the sources for which Barbarian men tell their children about to scare them. They are the source of nightmares to those which survive a confrontation with one or worse a whole tribe of them. Deep in the darker places of the world, in the deep jungles, vast dark forests or driven cold streaked tundra the Ravagers seek out their living prey.
No matter where you will find a Ravager they will all share the core belief that the power of their enemy can be consumed and absorbed into them by the eating of their enemies living flesh. It is this core belief that brings fear into all that combat the Ravager because they know that death will be a cruel end at the teeth of this truly wicked Barbarian. Those for which have survived battles with them note that during battle these men often appear as animals or superhuman beasts, fearless and violent in all actions for which they take. They adorn themselves with the bones of those they slain, the skins and hollowed heads of animals and paint themselves with dark colors to accent their yellowed eyes.
Role:
Much like their Barbarian brothers the Ravagers role is a one of the most violent of front line fighters you could hope for in a party. They fly into battle knowing there is power to be gained by the strongest of foes and will normally attack only the strongest opponents. This blind lust for power is also normally their undoing as they often find themselves over matched but stand firm in hopes of a victory.
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Hit Dice: D12
Class Skills:
As a traditional Barbarian
Skill Ranks:
As a traditional Barbarian
Class Modifications:
Level 1:
• The Power of Flesh (Replaces Rage)
The power of Flesh is unique to the Ravagers archetype as it provides advantages to the character based on what they are have consumed. A Ravager gains a storage point for every pound of flesh eaten and based on the HD level of the Humanoid/monster from which it has devoured, based on Table A below (It is assumed for game purposes that each kill yields only 3 maximum pounds of desired flesh, then whatever properties it contained is lost or destroyed with age. The Ravager can then spend those points to gain benefits from the stored power points based on table B below. The Ravager can conserve their stores for up to 24 hours (X.05 levels of Ravager) to a maximum of 96 hours. The maximum number of stored points they can possibly manage at once is equal to their constitution/2 plus the characters Ravager level. Once the points have been expended they cannot be used again. The duration of the power events last for the duration noted in the Power Events description. Additionally 1 Power Event point can be spent for each level the Ravager has achieved.
Table A
HD of creature consumed- Storage Points applied for powers from consumption
• -6 below current level- provides 0 points
• -5 below current level- provides .5 points
• -4 below current level- provides 1 point
• -3 below current level- provides 1.5 points
• -2 below current level- provides 2 points
• -1 below current level- provides 2.5 points
• Even HD- provides 3 points
• For every HD above the ravager add .5 / maximum of 7 points.
Table B
Sacrificing 1 storage point to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Hone Skill
Description: This event adds a small bonus to any skill the Ravager seeks to intensify. By using the stored power to focus or channel directly into that skill.
Application: Adds +1 to any designated skill for the duration. Other skills can be improved at the same time.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Battle Skills
Description: This event adds a small bonus to hit for the Ravager, by using the stored power to focus more intently on the battle at hand.
Application: Adds +1 to hit with any identified weapon type. Other weapon types can be improved at the same time.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: A Pound of Flesh
Description: This event adds a small bonus to one of the Ravagers Saving Throw bonuses. By using the stored power to prevent harm to the body.
Application: Adds +1 to any designated Save for the duration. Other Saves can be improved at the same time.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Replenish
Description: This event allows the Ravager to heal a small amount of personal damage they have sustained.
Application: Allows the Ravager to heal 1 point of damage taken and stop them from bleeding.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Total Aggression
Description: This event adds a small damage bonus to their physical damage ability. The Ravager sacrifices some of the power of their enemy to strength them.
Application: Adds +1 to damage with any physical weapon for the duration.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Nibble as a Cat
Description: This event adds a small dodge bonus to the Ravagers AC bonus. By using stored points the body can react with lightning speeds.
Application: Adds +1 to the characters Dodge bonus.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Sacrificing 2 storage points to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Totally Alert
Description: This event allows the Ravager to become totally focused on what is going on around them.
Application: The Ravager no longer can become flat footed for the duration.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Strength Surge
Description: This event adds a small amount of Strength from the stored power of their victims to trickle into their body.
Application: Allows the Ravager to gain a +1 temporary increase to their Strength Score. This will affect all Strength Related skills or ability increases.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Endurance Surge
Description: This event adds a small amount of Endurance from the stored power of their victims to trickle into their body.
Application: Allows the Ravager to gain a +1 temporary increase to their Constitution Score. This will adjust saving throws and hit points based on the added endurance for the duration.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: War Machine
Description: This event allows the Ravager to seem to power threw weakness and fatigue to continue to fight on.
Application: The Ravager is immune to the affects of Fatigue and Exhaustion for the duration.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Sacrificing 3 storage points to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Purge the Body
Description: This event will purge the body of Harmful diseases or toxins.
Application: Allows the Ravager a new saving throw against any Disease or Toxin each new round until purged.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Temper the Mind
Description: This event uses the stored spirit of others to prevent mental attacks against the Ravager.
Application: Allows the Ravager a +1 to resisting mind affecting spells. (Illusions, Fears, Controls and such)
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Great Leaps
Description: This event allows the stored power to be used to make incredible leaps.
Application: Allows a temporary +10 to jump checks and doubles the distance and height of jumps.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Increased Speed
Description: This event allows the stored power to be used to increase the movement of the Ravager.
Application: Allows +10 to movement for the duration.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Sacrificing 4 storage points to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Gorge
Description: This event allows the Ravager to perform a coup de grace on a fallen foe adding gained points within the same round of feeding. Typically it takes 1 turn to eat a pound of flesh unless this Event is used.
Application: Replaces the feeding time from 1 turn to 1 rd.
Duration of the Event: 1 Round
Name: Epic Strength
Description: This event adds a greater amount of Strength from the stored power of their victims to trickle into their body.
Application: Allows the Ravager to gain a +5 temporary increase to their Strength Score. This will affect all Strength Related skills or ability increases.
Duration of the Event: 1 rounds/Level
Name: Epic Endurance
Description: This event adds a small amount of Endurance from the stored power of their victims to trickle into their body.
Application: Allows the Ravager to gain a +5 temporary increase to their Constitution Score. This will adjust saving throws and hit points based on the added endurance for the duration.
Duration of the Event: 1 rounds/Level
Name: Mind of Madness
Description: This event masks the mind from alignment checks, making the Ravager appear to be Chaotic Neutral.
Application: Allows the Ravager the ability to trick those trying to read their thoughts and learn their secrets.
Duration of the Event: 1 Hour/Level
Sacrificing 5 storage points to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Wrap in Shadows
Description: This event allows the Ravager to gain the ability to Hide in Shadows provided that Shadows are present to hide in.
Application: Gains a +10 chance to hide in normal shadows.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Lost in the Fog
Description: This event masks the Ravager from device detection abilities. Like Crystal Balls, scrying, or magic spells which normally would allow the Ravager to be seen.
Application: Only normal sight can detect the Ravager as they appear to vanish to scrying and magical devices that try to locate them.
Duration of the Event: 1 Hour/Level
Name: Eye To Beast
Description: This event allows the Ravager to gaze directly into the eyes of any Beast or Animal and inform them of their inner strength. Forcing the beast to see the Male Alpha power possessed.
Application: Adds +10 to Handle Animal checks with regards to calming, control and getting beasts or animals to do as the Ravager wills.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Sacrificing 6 storage points to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Eye on the Vitals
Description: This event allows the Ravager to make a Sneak Attack on a vital area of the opponent’s body as if they were a Rogue of the same level. The requirements for the Sneak attack do not change.
Application: Sneak Attack ability for the duration of the event.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Regeneration
Description: This event seeks to regenerate a lost limb or part previously removed by some form of attack. This regeneration takes time and it is not something that happens immediately.
Application: Provides a limited form of Regeneration. Will allow re-growth of lost eyes, nose, mouth, nose or ears within 10 rounds while growing larger limbs in 20 rounds. Additionally heals 5 lost hit points per round used.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Extended Life
Description: This event adds Temporary hit points to the Ravager of which any damage done to the Ravager is removed from the Extended life total and not their true hit points. Once the duration ends the lost hit points do not count against the Ravager.
Application: Adds +10 Temporary hit points.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Sacrificing 7 storage points to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Lucid Movement
Description: This event allows the Ravager to seem to become blurred as if not totally in 1 place.
Application: This allows the Ravager to gain the benefits of a Blur for the duration of the ability.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Name: Flash of the Beast
Description: This event allows the Ravager to gain an additional attack to use on their enemies.
Application: Adds 1 additional attack at the highest BAB.
Duration of the Event: 1 round
Name: Dreaded Bite
Description: This event extends the teeth into sharpened knives allowing the Ravager the ability to bite for extreme damage.
Application: This adds a Bite ability for 1D8 plus strength bonus and the Improved Bite ability.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Sacrificing 10 storage points to perform any of the following Power Events:
Name: Form of the Beast
Description: This event transforms the flesh of the Ravager into a strange beast giving them enhanced size, strength, endurance and speed. This event summons the Wendigo which will last for the duration.
Application: +4 to Strength, Endurance and Dexterity. Gains Bite at 1D8 plus strength bonus and Claws at 1D6. Regeneration of 1 point per round, Added Damage Resistance of 1 point and Dark Vision. Can use Leap Attack and Rend Attack Abilities and gains a +10 to Jump and Grapple checks. Add +1 Size Category and reduces AC by 2.
Duration of the Event: 2 rounds/Level
Level 3:
• Intimidation Bonus (Trap Sense is replaced by Intimidation modifier equal to the Trap Sense Bonus acquired at third level).
Level 11:
• Rush of the Wendigo (Replaces Greater Rage)
• Adds +2 to Strength and Constitution scores for 1 rd per level of Ravager. Adds +2 damage bonus to the Animal Fury ability.
• Last 1/rd for every 2 levels
• Can be performed 1/day for every 2 levels.
Level 20:
• One with the Beast (Replaces Mighty Rage)
• Adds +4 to Strength and Constitution scores for 1 rd per level of Ravager. Adds +4 damage bonus to the Animal Fury ability.
• Add 1 size category and reduce AC by 2.
• Lasts 1/rd for every 2 levels.
• Can be performed 1/day for every 4 levels.
Rage Power Group:
(Only the following Rage Powers are available to this Archetype)
• Animal Fury (Received at level 2)
• Scent (Received at level 4)
• Improved Natural Attack (Bite) (Received at level 6)
• Terrifying Howl (Received at level 8)
• Fearless Rage (Received at level 12)
• Powerful Blow (Received at level 14)
• Strength Surge (Received at level 16)
• Rousing Anger (Received at level 18)
• Summon the Wendigo (Received at level 20)
All other Barbarian abilities are as noted with the exception of Rage abilities.
RPG Superstar 2012 Top 32
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Ok this is a very abstact idea I was working on. Over all game mechanics this dreaded idea has never been revealled because it is at the heart an evil concept. Therefore my idea was to provide a Archetype option for NPC's or characters DM's allow to play the Archetype. Keep in mind this is extensive and I am giving it to you as I have it written. This thing started small but because a monster as it grew (no pun intended). Feel free to do what you will with it. Hopefully you will enjoy the idea as it is at its core sinister and untouched.
**The Ravagers**
I think you are missing the point of this thread. You should have posted an RPG SS archetype that you would have submitted with a 450 wordcount. Not a poorly formatted monstrosity better suited for the Rules & Homebrew forum.
Hi all
I have my archetype - I was wondering about saving it for a Wayfinder maybe, but as you have all posted yours, I am considering sharing mine - but have reservations on posting it because...
a) it's ANOTHER ranger
b) it's ANOTHER river theme
So, would you like to see it or are you fed up with water based rangers now?
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Pen2Paper, I think you might be over wordcount there... : )
Maybe it was cast in part using illusory script - those words don't count :P
Post it and I'll critique it, Anthony. :-)
This is an archetype I haven't quite polished yet, but reflects the general idea of what I wanted to do.
The Marked Guardian
(Monk Archetype)
Searing Mark
At first level, Marked Guardian can place a divine mark on a corporeal opponent after making a successful unarmed melee attack. The opponent marked gains a -1 penalty on all attack rolls against Marked Guardian and his allies. This ability can be used number of times equal to half his monk level + Wisdom modifier.
At 4th level the marked opponent glows as if under the effect of a faerie fire spell.
At 8th level the attack penalty increases to -2 and incorporeal opponents can be marked as well.
At 12th level all allies get +2 to all saves against the marked opponent.
At 16th level the marked opponent is unable to use teleportation effects unless he passes a Will check (DC 10 + half monk level + Wisdom modifier).
At 20th level the Marked Guardian and his allies gain true seeing for matters regarding the marked opponent.
When one of the abilities is activated its effect lasts for 1d6+1 rounds per four monk levels after which the mark is expended.
This ability replaces Stunning Fist.
Divine Disciple
At forth level The Marked Guardian gains access to the paladin spell list. He is treated as paladin of the same level for those purposes.
This ability replaces ki pool.
Sliding Step
At fifth level, as a swift action, when an ally is threatened with an attack of opportunity, The Marked Guardian may choose to move himself over the distance equal to half his move speed towards the threatened ally. This ability is usable number of times equal to his Wisdom modifier and doesn’t provoke attack of opportunity.
This ability replaces High jump
Spellbound Mark
At seventh level the Marked Guardian may choose to place a mark imbued with a spell from the paladin spell list after he makes a successful unarmed melee attack or on a willing target or object. The spell remains inert until the monk chooses to activate it, or after he has regained daily spell slots.
This ability replaces Wholeness of body
Mark of the Heavens
When an ally has been dropped below zero hitpoints, the Marked Guardian may expend any Spellbound mark he has placed on the ally and convert it into a cure spell of the same level.
This ability replaces Abundant Step
Bane of Worlds
By expending a spell of the highest level, the Marked Guardian can perform a banishment spell. If he has placed a Searing Mark on the foe, he can expend it for a +2 bonus to the caster level check to overcome the target’s Spell Resistance. He can choose to place banishment as a Spellbound Mark.
This ability replaces Empty Body.
*sigh* I'd just written up a response to some of the witch comments (which I still really appreciate) and the forums ate it.
Short version of those comments:
Perhaps making the bonuses scale up every 4th level would be better? My concern was she's got to be able to work as a front-line fighter at 20th level and the core class already has low HP and BAB, plus she likely won't be wearing armor. By making it a morale bonus, she also won't get the iterative attacks for the higher BAB classes.
Now obviously she can boost all of those with her vengeance pool, so maybe I was giving it a little too much weight.
I did think about multiclassing, though that's something I very rarely do. Having the most powerful ability come at first level did give me pause, but again, I was trying to use the summoner as a comparison. I think dipping into one level of that would probably be more useful since then you get the additional aspects of the full eidolon instead of just the evolution pool.
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Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7
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Pen 2 Paper
This is a lot of math for us smashers.
That said I think the kernel of your idea is cool.
What if you took away rages until they killed, for each hit die they kill they get two rounds of rage, with a scaling max. Then they can spend 1 round of bloodied rage to use any rage power their level allows, this eliminates their rage powers and their uncanny or trap sense.
Now you've can take those other things you created edit it down to 5-10options and charge rage rounds to use them.
P33J
Thanks for the feedback. I had planned in the beginning to make this very slim. But like I said it grew into somethign more homebrewed. You get to a point where the creative process blows out what your intending at the start to do. I had no way to (in a nutshell) remove rage to account for flesh consumption points. Trying to do a streamline canabil is a huge task. As you see it failed to be simple. I had no back up plan if I had made it so this thing would have been hacked massively apart and the over all meat (the Rage being removed for the Flesh Points) would have had to get killed. I like your idea though.. this really would be a simple approuch. I do however like that they can use these points to power themselves up super naturally. (which I had not been able to accoutn for in that presentation. Again thank you for taking an honest look at it.
I think you should throw that over to the Homebrew forum P2P :)
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I see that the Lonesome Rider made the top 32, which I was pulling for. Mostly because I did this archetype and was my second choice over the cavalier archetype I submitted. They have a similar theme with the mounted gunslinger thing. I was worried that the gunslinger was an unpopular class and three friends I had shared it with supported this thinking. They don't like the gunslinger class and to tell you the truth I'm not crazy about it either. The western/fantasy match up doesn't quite sit well with me, and this archetype steps up the cowboy theme. Crazy thing is, my three friends live in Montana and Wyoming so maybe they are biased since they see the theme all the time.
Anyway, I really like the abilities here. The Break Broncs is tough. I wanted it to be good because it does nothing in the dungeons, but I don't want it to be so good that all cavaliers will take a level of gunslnger to gain it. I was thinking that it would add the Advanced Creature template, but then I wanted it to work for horses that already have it. A +2 bonus to each ability seems too weak considering it requires holding a grit and can only be used on horses (and usually can't be used in a dungeon). It also replaces Gunslinger's Dodge which is one of the stronger deeds. I had it replace that deed so that other archetypes could be taken at the same time (Pistolero and Mysterious Stranger, I think). What does every one think about this ability? What is the best way to balance it? Maybe just a +4 to STR and not DEX, so it still combos with Roping later?
Range War Wrangler (Gunslinger)
Artume livestock barons often employ gunmen, skilled at horsemanship, who protect their herds from thieves and predators. These range war wranglers are often rustlers themselves, openly stealing the cattle and horses of rival barons. This can lead to range wars, where, when the gun smoke clears, only the best are left standing.
Deeds: A range war wrangler swaps a trio of deeds for the following.
Break Broncs (Ex): At 1st level, if the range war wrangler has at least 1 grit point, she can mount any horse or pony, bending it to her will and improving its combat abilities. Any such mount is considered combat trained while she rides. An equine mount already so trained, gains a +4 morale bonus to Strength and Dexterity and an additional 10-feet to speed as long as the range war wrangler is mounted and has at least 1 grit point. This deed replaces the gunslinger's dodge deed.
Unmounting Shot (Ex): At 7th level, the range war wrangler can spend 1 grit point before rolling a firearm attack against the steed of a mounted enemy. Her shot cannot be negated with the Mounted Combat feat, and if it hits, she makes a trip combat maneuver against the target as a free action with a +4 bonus. This trip attempt does not provoke an attack of opportunity and the range war wrangler cannot be tripped in return. This deed replaces the targeting deed.
Roping (Ex): At 15th level, as long as the range war wrangler has at least 1 grit point and at least 15-feet of rope, she may prepare a lariat as a move action. The lariat is a ranged weapon, with a range increment of 10-feet, and a maximum range equal to the length of the rope (max. 50-feet). A Medium size lariat deals 1d2 bludgeoning damage, plus Strength bonus, while a Small one deals 1 damage, plus Strength bonus. The lariat has the grapple, nonlethal, and trip special qualities, and the range war wrangler can spend 1 grit point to activate the grapple special quality on a standard hit. If mounted, she may replace her own Strength bonus with her mount's for CMB on trips and grapples made with the lariat and for damage while in the grapple. She may also use the mount's movement for moving the grapple. This deed replaces the slinger's luck deed.
Barreling Turn (Ex): At 12th level, the range war wrangler may spur her horse or pony mount to make a single turn of up to 180-degrees while taking a run or charge action. Each 45-degrees the mount turns costs it 5-feet of movement. This ability replaces the bonus feat gained at 12th level.
Please let me know what you think of this archetype. I think it is a given that I should have submitted this over the Oathlorn Cavalier, but tell me what you think. Thanks.
Waystrider (Magus)
I think this is really cool and pretty well done. I had similar ideas when I read the Sevenarches background, but I failed to tie my brief ideas to a character class. Magus is perfect, but I just forget about it most of the time. I really like the Following Step idea, but it is risky to use as the waystrider doesn't know where he is going or what threats are there. That makes it kind of cool, but maybe too risky to use. Maybe he can also bring his allies? Anyway, really cool idea and I could have seen this making the cut to top 16.
Ok, seems peeps would prefer sharing so here you go... water ranger #76564853 :P
Title Box... ;) (showing title after preview :P)
Submission Box... (showing the resulting post, not the mark up :P)
Mistwalker (Ranger)
Born of the waters of the Sellen or the Lake of Mists and Veils, the mistwalker is a mysterious protector of the waterways of the River Kingdoms, appearing from the morning mists when needed, lending his aid, and fading away at day’s end.
Class Skills: A mistwalker gains Knowledge (local) as a class skill and does not gain Knowledge (dungeoneering) as a class skill.
River Pirates’ Bane (Ex): Starting at 1st level, a mistwalker observing acts of piracy (attacking waterborne vessels, pillaging settlements, or enslaving) gains a +1 circumstance bonus, that stacks with his favored enemy bonuses, to attacks against favored enemies committing these acts. At 11th level this bonus increases to +2. This ability replaces wild empathy.
Water is Life (Ex): Starting at 3rd level, a mistwalker develops gills behind his ears allowing him to breathe in fresh water indefinitely and can detect fresh water streams and rivers within 200 feet. This ability replaces endurance.
Misty Vapors (Su): Starting at 8th level, a mistwalker may assume gaseous form (as the spell) twice per day, for one minute per mistwalker level. He may only become ground mist, cannot fly but can reach his running speed over a fresh water surface. This ability replaces swift tracker.
Water Top Dancer (Ex): Starting at 9th level, a mistwalker, wearing light or no armor, gains the ability to traverse the surface of fresh water leaving no trace of his passage on the surface. He must move at least 10 feet every round or sink immediately. This ability replaces evasion.
Waterfall Surge (Su): Starting at 12th level, a mistwalker may assume a body of fresh water instead of vapor once per day, lasting for 2 minutes per mistwalker level. Submersing in fresh water renders him invisible. A mistwalker who takes a single move action in this form to reach enemies in the same water, or on an open deck or waterside bank within 10 feet of the water’s surface, can make a leaping attack out of the water, reverting immediately to his natural form. This grants him automatic surprise, a +2 circumstance bonus on his initial attack and his initiative. This ability replaces camouflage.
One with the Flow (Su): Starting at 16th level, a mistwalker gains the ability to enter fresh water in either of his mist or water forms, dispersing completely. On the next round, he reforms anywhere the fresh water flows or is connected to. The distance traversed is restricted only by the extent of the connected fresh water courses. He cannot leave the water course into seas, oceans or other salt water regions. He can use his Waterfall Surge leaping attack when reforming. This ability replaces improved evasion.
That is very cool from a swift read-over.
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Dedicated Voter Season 6, Star Voter Season 7
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Anthony Adams
OOOOOh Waterworld Ranger :D
RPB
I'm confused. Is this a +1 against pirates, that stacks with favored or is it an additional +1 to favorite when they're pirates? It's cool, just a bit confusing as written.
Water is Life
Yep, might have liked some bonus to fighting underwater as well, but this is solid and thematically solid.
Mighty Vapors
Yikes, this might be a little unbalanced in the trade. It's cool, but trading it for Swift Tracker seems highly advantageous to the player.
Water Top Dancer
Cool, love it, and its a solid trade with evasion, maybe even a bit of a downgrade.
Waterfall Surge
Cool, and I'll take three levels of rogue to make this money.
One with the Flow
Feels a little bit of a waste, specifically, I think you could have made this a part of Waterfall Surge, like an upgrade to the power at level 16
In all I think you could have saved a little bit of copy and made Mighty Vapors, Waterfall Surge and One with the flow, 1 power that uses up Swift, Camo and Improved and just called it Freshwater Form, and given the player the ability to be vapor at one level, waterfall surge the next and then one with the flow for the final or any variations you felt fit.
But very very cool, thanks.
PJL
okay- here's my archetype. like i said, i know this ended up being pretty crowded design territory (though, i feel like it would have held up pretty well against the competition... i may be a bit biased though). looking forward to hearing everyone's feedback. i think the wordcount is pretty close but i'm not positive (it was, after all, handwritten on some paper until i typed it here, lol).
Freeman (Ranger)
Most rangers are rugged individualists, bound only by their own sense of right and wrong. In the River Kingdoms, however, there are some who hold so tightly to the Six Freedoms that the code shapes not only their choices but the powers they wield.
Say What You Will (Ex): Freemen gain a bonus equal to half their level to all saving throws against [language-dependent, mind-affecting] effects. This ability replaces Track, Wild Empathy, and Swift Tracker.
Oathbreakers Must Die (Ex): Freemen gain a +2 bonus on weapon attack and damage rolls and to Will saves against targets who break an oath. At 1st level, a Freeman gain this benefit against anyone who willing gives him a written or verbal guarantee (such as a pledge, promise, or vow) and violates it. At 5th level, he gains this benefit against anyone he witnesses breaking an oath, regardless of to whom it was made; at 10th level the Freeman gains it against any target that he has reliable evidence of having broken an oath. This bonus increases by +2 at 5th level and every 5 levels thereafter. This ability replaces Favored Enemy, and functions as it for the purpose of determining eligible targets for Quarry, Improved Quarry, and Master Hunter.
Walk Any Road (Su): At 4th level, a freeman gains the granted powers of the Liberation domain as a cleric of his ranger level -3 and adds the 1st-4th level domain spells to his spell list. This does not grant him any additional spells per day. This ability replaces Hunter’s Bond.
Courts Are For Kings (Su): Starting at 7th level, a freeman always count as being neutral on the law-chaos axis when determining the negative consequences of any alignment-based spells or effects. He can still gain any appropriate benefits based on his actual alignment. This ability replaces Woodland Stride.
Slavery Is An Abomination (Sp): Once per day, a freeman of 9th level or higher can attempt to free another creature from magical oppression. By making a level check (1d20 + freeman level) against a DC of 11 + caster level of the effect, he can use this ability to end any [compulsion] effect or any transmutation effect which normally allows a save to resist. Alternatively, he can use this ability on a possessed creature, forcing the possessing entity to make a will save (DC 10 + 1/2 the freeman’s level + his Wisdom modifier) or be expelled. This ability can be used one additional time per day at 13th and 17th levels. It replaces Evasion.
You Have What You Hold (Ex): At 16th level, a freeman gains a +4 bonus to his CMB and CMD for disarm and steal attempts. He does not automatically drop held items when stunned, panicked, or suffering from similar effects. This ability replaces Improved Evasion.
on an unrelated note- i think i should have some more time this afternoon for some more reviews.
OK, I figure I'll post my second archetype, see what kind of feedback I get on this one (though I still would love any other feedback on the witch too). I'll keep working my way through these as well.
Uncrowned King (Paladin)
Many Riverfolk, from exiled nobles in Gralton to Brevic explorers in the Stolen Lands, believe they deserve a throne. But only a few, favored by a god, truly have a divine right to rule.
Alignment: An uncrowned king's alignment must match her deity's. Her code of conduct requires her to protect people she believes she is destined to rule and always work to gain her throne.
Symbol of authority (Ex): At first level, an uncrowned king begins play with a symbol of authority at no cost. The item, which may be an amulet, armor, crown, ring, shield or weapon, is always of masterwork quality and can function as her holy symbol. If lost or destroyed, it can be replaced after 1 week in an 8-hour ritual that costs 200 gp per paladin level plus the cost of the masterwork item.
Once per day while wielding or wearing her symbol, an uncrowned king may use the powers from any domain her god grants as if she were a cleric of equal level. At 4th level, and every three levels thereafter, she gains an additional use of a domain power.
This replaces detect evil and smite evil.
Alignment aura (Ex): The power of an uncrowned king's aura for detect alignment spells is equal to her level.
First follower (Ex): At 4th level, an uncrowned king gains Squire (Knights of the Inner Sea) as a bonus feat. This replaces channel positive energy.
Spells: At 4th level, an uncrowned king can cast divine spells. A good uncrowned king uses the paladin's spell list; an evil uncrowned king uses the antipaladin's spell list. A neutral uncrowned king must choose the paladin or antipaladin's spell list; once picked, this cannot be changed.
Divine Bond (Su): At 5th level, an uncrowned king forms a divine bond with her symbol of authority. Depending on the symbol, this ability functions as a normal paladin's; a divine defender's; a sacred shield's; or a sacred servant's bond. This modifies a normal paladin's divine bond.
Aura of Influence (Su): At 11th level, the area in a 10-foot radius around an uncrowned king is treated as if it had strong planar alignment traits of her alignment. This replaces aura of justice.
Aura of Sovereignty (Su): At 14th level, an uncrowned king can change the planar magic traits in a 10-foot radius as a standard action. The ability functions only while the uncrowned king is conscious. This replaces aura of faith.
Aura of Authority (Ex): At 17th level, an uncrowned king's auras extend to 30 feet. This replaces aura of righteousness.
Royal Decree (Su): At 20th level, an uncrowned king may use greater command at will. This replaces holy champion.
I thought playing with Kingmaker was a really viable option for this challenge, since it's such a popular Adventure Path. I was surprised more of the official entries didn't try to do that.
I was however SLAMMING into the word count HARD on this one. It was really just killing me, to the point I wasn't sure if I'd have been willing to submit it with all the trims, even though I thought it was mechanically safer than the witch, as I didn't know if it worked without most of the fluff. I was never thrilled with the aura of authority power -- though I did like extending the auras, and might have tried to do it earlier in the leveling process -- but it was a nice SHORT power set.
The main conceit was obviously changing the alignment, which I thought worked with the real revisioning of what this character would be (King Arthur, among many others). I didn't realize that would be quite as controversial as it seemed to be in the Green Knight, but I still feel like it works here, as the uncrowned king really isn't meant to be a good holy warrior, even though it plays off the class.
Anyway, once I changed the alignment, that basically informed everything else I had to change. I had a version that played it a bit safer -- basically the paladin bonuses were the same but only in the character's home region (which wasn't really defined) -- for example, "At 14th level, an uncrowned king's weapon is treated as +5 for purposes of overcoming damage reduction while in her home kingdom. This otherwise works as a normal paladin's aura of faith.". I thought that was pretty dull, however, so tried the above instead.
Some other things I'd have considered if I could have: Giving a boost to Sense Motive to replace detect evil. Instead, it just had to get discarded along with smite evil. That's probably a power drop.
I also was REALLY sad to lose some of the fluff. Aura of Influence should note that the uncrowned king begins being able to command the very area around her (or something along that).
And first follower was originally much longer: First follower (Ex): At 4th level, an uncrowned king gains Squire (Knights of the Inner Sea) as a bonus feat. This is often an older family retainer or even a protective parent, rather than a knight aspirant. At 7th level, when the feat graduates to Leadership, the retainer may retire, to be replaced by a new cohort using the normal Leadership rules. This retirement does not affect the uncrowned king's Leadership score. This replaces channel positive energy.
Lastly, I'd have loved to play with the kingdom building rules a bit in this archetype too, but again, word count just stopped me cold before I even was able to look into it. (I also wasn't sure that would be as well received, in case someone ends up playing this and never actually getting her own kingdom.)
Heh heh, my crown as king of clumsy phrases is retained but it does seem to be slipping - you only got confused by one paragraph - a big achievement for me :P
In answer to the pirates bane query, yes, it's an additional +1 that only applies when the pirates are also favored enemies. (This restriction to offset the swap and not over-power favored enemy bonuses too much, in earlier drafts, there was some scaling.) - so this was definitely me trying to ensure that it wasn't a dip into archetype. Hope that is clearer.
Misty Vapors - yes, it was very powerful on first draft as it was just gaseous, but I wanted a better river tie in, a stronger thematic link, so I took away flying and restricted it to the mist theme in the archetype lead in description, and in turn having taken away flying which didn't fit the theme, allowed running speed over river surfaces instead.
I toyed with merging the last two a lot, back and forth quite a few times, even swapping the order, I just couldn't make up my mind. I think I went this way in the end because I had removed evasion earlier on, so it made sense to replace the improved evasion and the other power linked so nicely as a camouflage effect.
There's my design thoughts on the feedback thus far - glad you like it, it means I'm on the right track.
Ok Anothony: Misty vapors to one with the flow are all essentially the same power expanded (or they can be) consider combining them in an elegant fashion and saving yourself some word count. Presentation here can be slicker. Consider revising this " to attacks against favored enemies committing these acts" it's worded extremely awkwardly. Despite crowded design space this is actually fairly original with the form changes and what not. Good job overall.
Ed LAnge: IT would have held up fine, but it would have been middling, I'm misisng an innovative power that gives the archetype a wow factor. I really like the travel domain choice but it doesn't highlight your design skill. Most of the rest are just bonuses.
a quickie, during lunch...
Boastful Champion- i like your idea for the boasts, its creative and pretty well done; i think you should have clarified the shaken effect though. (all day unless removed, or it can't be removed? what if she's already shaken?) i'm not a big fan of replacing uncanny dodge with a feat- its not a great trade and imp. initiative doesn't seem that thematic for the archetype. behold my conquests is an interesting power, but why would you need a know[history] check to remember your own exploits in battle? maybe if it was to recall your ancestors' or tribes' accomplishments... but this also gives a barb an Int based class feature which is odd, increases MAD, and means that this ability can't be used raging.
Outsea Seeker- for me, this isn't an exciting archetype but it seems pretty mechanically sound. i could see this being in a published supplement (with just a little more tweaking). i'm guessing that the ranger level -2 in hunter's bond is a typo (should be -3), if not you should point out that its an intentional change from the standard ability.
Anarchist- i can't put my finger on it, but htere's something i like about this. that said, i do think there are some mechanical issues... deceitful purpose needs to have some limitation on bluff (like "and to bluff checks to convince others of the thruthfulness of a statement"), othewise it makes them outrageously good at feinting, which makes the ability way unbalanced with the one it replaces. spread dissention can't prohibit triggering readied actions (after all, enemies trigger readied actions all the time- its just a matter of what condition you set to trigger it). instill treachery is interesting but since anarchy/chaos is such a big part of the archetype it might make more sense if the creature just became uncontrolled (possibly with the stipulation that it viewed the caster who summoned it as an enemy).
ok, i'll try to get to some more later this afternoon.
Thanks for the commentary, guys! I was originally considering the class as an alternate class for the bard, not just an archetype. Maybe I'll keep moving in that direction.
@only the lower level abilities - Yes, I know it's only the lower level abilities. I got sidetracked when I was originally was working on it, and never even got the first full draft done.
@bardic music use versus bardic performance rounds - this is the sort of mistake I can only blame on myself. And the reason I'm trying to wean everyone I know off 3.5e, so I can stop confusing the rules to myself.
@nothing else to spend bardic music on - that was part of my concern with the class as I had put it together, but I decided to leave it while posting, instead of editing it. Glad to see that fret wasn't misplaced.
@A Jack by himself - the idea is jacks don't travel by themselves. They're followers, or at least leaders. Not loners.
@Jack of all trades - That's exactly where the name came from, as well as the Jack in a modern set of cards. (king, queen, jack..)
@Inspired Competence - hmm, those are some really good points I hadn't even noticed. Especially a Jack being able to use it on themselves.
@Jack preparing spells - What is it called when a spontaneous spellcaster spends an hour to regain spells, then? just regaining them? Seems like a weird way to say it.