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To put it simply whilst playing through RoTRL my PC (a TN tiefling ranger) has unwillingly and accidentally adopted a baby goblin. Now he doesn't like the idea of thrusting a 2 ft timebomb of puke, crap and tears onto anyone else nor does he like the idea of returning it to a goblin tribe so it can slaughter countless innocent dogs and horses.
Throw in the fact he isn't keen on slaughtering babies or abandoning them the only option left is to raise it himself, whilst adventuring. This is where the problem lies, also I fear the goblin has become too attached to my PC in this short space of time and the my DM will have introduced an extreme vulnerability to Puppy eyes for my PC.
how should my PC go about caring for a goblin baby in the setting of an adventure?
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Goblin babies love long lengths of chain. They also love deep bodies of water.
Tell your GM to let up or you're going to combine the two.
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I say sautee.
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This looks like a job for Create Demiplane and Summon Babysitter!
I was serious about the first. I thought of creating a demiplane for your little tyke to live in, free from external bad stuff (villain kidnaps your baby, cleric of Lamashtu gives goblin ideas.) And then someone of like-mindedness to watch over him. Hey, maybe there's a goblin paladin SOMEWHERE (heaven forbid how many times I hear people want to make a goblin paladin, there must be some.)
Just saying. I'm no parent, much less one of a goblin. I'm also not an adventurer doing saving the world or whatever shenanigans you do.
Aha forget to mention this, I also have an animal companion at this point so would any particular animals make exceptional baby-sitters? I was thinking a kangaroo (go for the obvious) but i'm guessing there are some more effective and or hilarious(-ly bad) alternatives.
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#1 : Find a sack.
#? : Teach the Goblin to be a Feral Gnasher Barbarian.
#2 : Put the Goblin in the sack.
#D : Learn the Deceptive Exchange Feat to gift the sack to an enemy.
#VI: Profit as baby Gob chews their face off
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Temples of Shelyn. They love ANYBODY. Tested and proven in a JR game, I was stuck with four of them.
What level are you and your group (if any)?
What level are you and your group (if any)?
We have a group of 6, all level 6 currently
This includes:My PC
CG Priest of Caiden Cailyn
LN Tengu Gunslinger
NE Drow Sorcerer
NG Half-Orc Fighter
LN Udine Inquisitor
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Once i watched this movie about Gandhi. A crying muslin came to him and said "Once, in a fit of rage i smashed the head of this hindu boy, now i fear i'm going to hell. What should i do?". Gandhi answered: "Yes you are going to hell. But i known one way to fool hell. You need to found another hindu boy that lost his parents. And you are going to raise him. But as a hindu, not muslin. Just then will you redeem yourself."
It was a long time and i didn't remember the movie very well but the essence was kind that.
How the baby came to your guard? Your character killed his parents? If so, then the just thing to do should be deliver the little guy to the nearest goblin village and hope that you wont have to face him on the field. If not (if you didn't killed them), why you shouldn't do that? It is because goblins are evil? Then a genocide on the goblin kind should be justifiable... but it isn't. Because they can overcome their natures, it isn't.
It's a tough question really. Sorry my english.
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I would see about maybe finding a druid to be am adoptive parent. Maybe even a goblin druid somewhere?
Another option would be to just raise the little bugger and eventually have him be your squire. And,honestly, it could be kinda fun.
"Hand me m sword!"
Goblin squire hands you a sharp stick he was using to clean his nose.
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I have a tiefling paladin who is dealing with this same problem. We destroyed a small "village" of goblins living beneath a large city we were in. After putting the goblins to the sword, we heard the crying of a babe. Ulrik, my paladin, immediately rushed towards the sound thinking it a kidnap victim or something of that nature. What we found was a tiny goblin infant, wrapped in tattered rags.
Our ranger, who despises goblins/goblinoids, wanted us to kill the child. As did our Sorceress, who had lost a lover to goblinkind. Ulrik ignored them and took the child into his arms and claimed that if any harm can to it they would suffer holy retribution. I had planned to take the child and give it to adoption, to find a suitable caretaker, but eventually Ulrik grew attached. He made a custom harness with which he could carry his "daughter". Between adventures he taught her of Iomadae's faith and that of the other goodly gods, disciplined her when necessary, and showed her the ways of civil folk.
Three years in-game have passed since they met and Ulrik adopted her. She has taken a strong liking to the teachings of Saranrae, and is being groomed to join the clergy.
Goblins mature very quickly. They're considered "adult" at 5 years. While I'm not sure what the time frame is for RotRL, that could play into your mental calculus, as well.
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All goblin babies need are love, kindness and teething rings. Lots and lots of teething rings.
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I say you need to watch the Lonewolf and Cub series.
And get that pram pimped!
The 1/2 ork says mmmmm Goblin Veal for dinner yummmmmm.
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I don't see how an adventurer can properly raise any infant/baby in that environment (delving into dangerous dungeons,ect). Thats akin to a Police officer or fire Fighter taking a baby while shooting bad guys or putting out house Fires while endangering the baby.
So far the best thing to do is to give the baby up for adoption via a clergy or Church, such as Shelyn as someone pointed out.
A Baby is not the same as an animal companion or co-hort through the Leadership Feat....
A compromising DM would let the baby stay for a while until the situation is fixed (i.e. a quest to get to the Church or orphanage willing to take the child, maybe a hermit witch that likes to train Golbins in a Circus,ect), but in the end the DM should force the player to recognize that carrying a little Golbin pukester baby in a backback is a bad idea for the player and for the party.
No more stealth checks.... Baby makes too much noise... Combat started? Baby cries.... Goodluck trying to get sleep every 3 hours that baby is awake and hungry..
Ohh and that Goblin is gonna love Torches in your backpack real soon and the flint and steel to light em up.
COHORT!!! A goblin cohort would kick a$$!
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Oh yeah, torches and campfires were definitely a hassle. Ulric had his fair share of fires he had to put out because of his daughter. It's actually how she got her name, Pyra. He eventually taught her to control her pyromaniacal urges, after much complaining from her and how fire was so "pretty", she began to realize that fire can hurt people so she want allowed to start them without him supervising. Now 3 years old, she is usually the one who starts our fire when we break camp for the night, much to her enjoyment.
There's ways to work around the goblin needs and fetishes, you just gotta find a way to keep the kid happy as well as safe.
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Awesomeness of Lone Wolf & Cub imagery applied to a tiefling and goblin babby aside*, there's probably going to come a point where you're going to have to find someone else to be able to take care of the child from time to time when you go into harm's way.
Considering all the AoE's, traps, enviornmental hazards, and any number of other things that could result in instant death for low level/HD beings even with high level folks watching over them, it would really be best for the child to have someplace safe to stay. Whether it's a good church or other organization actually worthy of being called good or a trusted NPC ally or cohort, having the child out of danger will be less stressful in the long run.
*It really is a fun visual.
Handy Haversack? Stuff the kid in during adventuring, break it out whilst at the bar and show off your nurturing, "soft side" for the ladies at the tavern, stuff the kid in whilst enjoying your new friend's company.
Maybe equip Gobobaby with a snorkel, which can protrude from the top of the bag to circumvent the 10 minute suffocation rule?
Oxen pulling a wagon with a baby seat in the back?
"I'll dig a ditch and bury the b@@#&!" said Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
"I'll dig a ditch and bury the b#~&+!" said Barnacle Bill the Sailor.
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well comparing adventurers raising children to modern day policemen is a bit off.
All people were not raised in cities or with permanent homes in the past.
The Jews wandered the desert for 40 years.
Nomads, bedouins, gypsies, most of the north american natives, all wanderers who taught their children at an early age things we would consider child endangerment today.
Heck they threw leonitus out in a loin cloth at age 10 to kill a wolf with a sharp stick!
Knights were known to take squires at age 10-12 and a page was as young as 6.
So there are many cases of children going out and facing the world.
Indiana Jones and Short round anyone?
Tarzan and Boy?
Your trouble I think will come with the first AoE you run into... poof no more baby goblin.
take leadership feat, have goblin be your cohort. mercifully forgo the army of other mooks you also gain.
have him take 3 levels in weapon bearer squire fighter and continue from there as a herald squire + standard-bearer cavalier. order of the dragon, naturally.
ultimate support minion (with banner and such it also acts as a mascot of sorts)!
this keeps your new goblin child from randomly dying in any AoE's he's caught in, as both classes have respectable hit dice and moderate saves, have him take his regular feats in toughness/improved initiative/iron will/lightning reflexes, etc. his fighter feats as power attack and catch off-guard, and his cavalier feats as furious focus and throw anything.
he can kill people with the weapon you hand him, or with the whetstone he sharpened your sword with.
your character dies? play your goblin, or perhaps a knightly type to take him under your wing from there.
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0wQhiptQBE
Show the baby a tiny weapon of your favored variety.
and show the baby a ball
"Chose the ball and you will join your mother in death"
What if it has a zesty session with the ball?
*It really is a fun visual.
hahaha
I just could not resist...
http://i.picasion.com/pic62/2f4ebc7d8f86b3997ffe6dd73776175f.gif
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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0wQhiptQBE
Show the baby a tiny weapon of your favored variety.
and show the baby a ball
"Chose the ball and you will join your mother in death"
Lone Wolf and Cub. Man, I did not expect to that see that in this thread.
Now I'm envisioning the OP pushing around a baby carriage made of awesome to fight dragons.
*It really is a fun visual.
hahaha
I just could not resist...
http://i.picasion.com/pic62/2f4ebc7d8f86b3997ffe6dd73776175f.gif
Made my day.
Let's hope!
I think that you are forgetting something about the RotRL goblins. I've made it to Thistletop and etc. so far, and according to everything we've heard, these goblins never bothered humanity, until recently.
So releasing it to the tribe isn't a bad thing as long as you have killed the leaders that are inciting the goblins to violence.
If however, you wish to keep the goblin, the best idea is indeed some sort of extradimensional storage space...although one could argue that putting it in there for hours at a time is inhumane as well.
I do applaud your bravery in not slaughtering the goblin. I had a group of players once who slaughtered the old, the sick, the women, and the baby goblins. All of them. In cold blood. Systematically exterminating the entire tribe.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E0wQhiptQBE
Show the baby a tiny weapon of your favored variety.
and show the baby a ball
"Chose the ball and you will join your mother in death"
Lone Wolf and Cub. Man, I did not expect to that see that in this thread.
Now I'm envisioning the OP pushing around a baby carriage made of awesome to fight dragons.
+1
Ring gates might be safer than a Haversack. Depending where the second ring is.
Reincarnate spell, make it something that isn't a pyromaniacal sadistic imp. Not a fan of the goblin baby dilemma.
I can take it of leave it, the goblin baby dilemma that is. My RotRL group eliminated the goblin pups without real hesitation. One character paused the others jumped on it.
I do like the most of the ideas here. Give it a few levels of Expert and a couple in bard then have it be your parties accountant. That would be my 2 cp.
Talk to your DM about casting an "aging" spell on it. This spell is used by the drow to "fast-grow" slaves to adulthood so that they can be productive immediately. This prevents the drow from having to take care of baby slaves.
The aging spell costs 50 gp in components, is a, shall we say...3rd level spell? The drow sorcerer would know of it. It only works on willing people, and ages them by 1d6+4 years or something. Now your goblin baby is an adult, mentally and physically.
Now give it a shield and a sword, make it your cohort (take Leadership), and boom! Useful goblin companion. Make sure to stress the "roleplaying opportunity" to your DM, along with the fact that it is "in character," and uses an "ingenious" spell.
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This looks like a job for Create Demiplane and Summon Babysitter!
I was serious about the first. I thought of creating a demiplane for your little tyke to live in, free from external bad stuff (villain kidnaps your baby, cleric of Lamashtu gives goblin ideas.) And then someone of like-mindedness to watch over him. Hey, maybe there's a goblin paladin SOMEWHERE (heaven forbid how many times I hear people want to make a goblin paladin, there must be some.)
Just saying. I'm no parent, much less one of a goblin. I'm also not an adventurer doing saving the world or whatever shenanigans you do.
I has Goblin Paladin XD
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I don't see how an adventurer can properly raise any infant/baby in that environment (delving into dangerous dungeons,ect). Thats akin to a Police officer or fire Fighter taking a baby while shooting bad guys or putting out house Fires while endangering the baby.
Pretty common in the movies. Watch the ending fights of Hardboiled.
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Well there's a few things to remember that are significant here.
1: Pathfinder goblins are not what you'd really call 'caring'. They lock their babies in cages/kennels when they're babies and sort of throw food at them now and then. (( Not all that often with goblin's endless hunger))
2: Goblins reach full maturity at about age 5 if memory serves. This would put their 'infancy' under a year, their 'todler' stage another year. "Child" stage at about 3, then 'Teen' years at about 4.. then 'Adult' at about 5.
So if your char keeps the 'baby' assuming it's a new born, it'll be walking and starting to talk by 1, by 2 it'll be like a 5 to 10 year old human in "mentality' (( not saying 'as smart' but roughly here)) That's well with in the "Here follow along and hide if stuff goes down" Area.
You start training it at roughly 3 years old and you're good to go after that.
I can't speak for other people's games but time tends to go by pretty quick. Especially in Pathfinder/fantasy games. When it might take you 2 or 3 months to get where you're going via horse, there's alot of hand waving of time. "You set out from Doofusvill on horseback, for once you're not molested on the trip but it takes 3 months to cross the Goober region and up into the mountains of Dork" and in one sentence three months have passed. (( Not that any adventuring party has ever traveled and NOT been harassed/attacked/tricked/trapped/or other wise molested on the trip, but you get the point))
So.. your 'Baby" goblin, won't be a "baby" for long. 2, 3 'years' in game at most. Add that to the fact that they're kept in cages like (Dangerous) pets till they become smart enough on their own to bust out and 'join' goblin society, riding around in a saddle bag or back pack of an adventurer, is likely a step --up-- from traditional goblin infancy. As babies goblins have to worry about the baby born 2 weeks before it, eating it if the parents forget to feed them for a week. An adventurer, that even gives half a care to keep the thing from being stepped on by a monster is going to be the best goblin parent ever.
(( As a side note. I love the Pathfinder goblins. I just love how they're presented/re-invented.))
and so what do you do when your neutral good bard has a neutral evil goblin child that you can't control?
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Well that goes back to the 'nature/nurture' debate. If the child is a 'neutral' evil, then it can likely be taught to be better.
But if your GM thinks that the goblins are just evil by... *Waves hand* Birth, and not growing up in the -highly- dysfunctional goblin society (( I mean... they're locked in cages like rats as babies... pyromania and sadism as societal norms?) Then there's not going to be much you can do. You should ask your GM Out of game how he sees the goblins.
Personally I've played a goblin PC before. It was all kinds of fun. We played it as if much of their insanity was learned, not inborn. still there's a good bit of fun to be had by playing them a bit zany.
To return to the question though, it depends on how your GM sees Goblins.
A) Evil by nature, not learned: Then you need to find some other goblins to give it to. As it's just going to bite off your face as you sleep
B) Evil is learned, therefore the goblin can be taught to be 'better'. Then have fun with it and training it. It'll likely still have some odd personality traits but there's no reason to just 'assume' that it'll slit your throat for your matches.
Well you cant simply demand an alignment for the goblin by saying "I raise it right" , then we wouldn't have any chaotic evil dwarves.
IRL we wouldnt have Charles Manson or other evil people (whose moms swear they raised them right)
So you dont just get to choose the alignment based on what you want because you found a baby.
I know a guy who got mauled by a bear he raised from a cub, he raised 4 bears and 6 or more wolves, had trouble with this one bear.... lost several fingers, an eye.... it was pretty nasty. Bears ARE instinct-wise wild, dangerous predators.... you can't control that because you bottle fed it.
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Goblins are sapient beings. You don't know for certain how they'll turn out after being raised in a better environment until you've tried.
If difficulties come up, it's a roleplaying challenge.
If the player's efforts are stymied at every turn no matter what they do, then the player and GM probably have very different expectations for what they want out of the game and are better off not gaming with each other.