But everyone knows that the person who declares goal forfeits all points to everyone else unless they play chopsticks on a piano made of blueberry pie.
New rule: Only people who're hopping on 1 leg can earn points!
I declare opposite day! All points gained are now points lost!
I hereby donate all my points to Charles Scholz.
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Wall Street lays an egg, Buddy can't spare a dime, the Nazis invade Poland, Leningrad survives, the atomic bomb is invented and used, China turns red, Sir is revealed at long last to have no shame or decency, everyone loves Lucy, the President is shot, the King has a dream, Mankind takes a giant leap, I is a crook, this is a bug-hunt, we never had it so good, it's morning in America, the Empire strikes back, the USSR collapses, "potato" is spelled with an "E," the economy is stupid, you've got mail, Bob Dole likes peanut butter, Al Gore wins the Presidency, I win the 20th Century.
BRAINS!!! *bites the ball*
While everyone has been sleeping, I have scored mega chicken points.
BBQ Sauce fowl! You weren't covered with sauce lose a flag!
Smurf attack! All non-smurfy folks lose 15 squirrels
Well Smurf!
Double smurf penalty for placing a rule after your last rule, lose 13.5 meters
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I mention that I ate square 12 so everyone is forced to draw their own square 12 on the sidewalk, but because the clown didn't catch me he has to voice record all those free personalized alternatives he cleverly devised on everyone's voicemail for the next hour and then draw his square 12 with lightning bug guts
*paints "Dungeon Master Screen'd!" on his forehead and thinks really hard about rolling 20's*
18!
7...
14!
14! Again...
3...crud
Nat Twenny!!!
3 points to the next chimpanzee that juggles itself.
10.....9.......8.....7...6..5..4..3.2.1
Time is up!
All chimpanzees are now non-juggleable.
All pancakes are double points. All trianlges are invalid. All rampant looting is punishable by tickle torture. The ball is no offsides when parallel to fourth big toe. I call shananagins on a Monday for extra sauce points.
I tag you with the calvin ball. The score is me winning to everyone else losing.
Yes, but thanks to the "Take your move back Monday" rule now your it. And I have the pudding of protection in my pocket so now you need at least two signatures in triplicate from the warehouse raptors before you can do anything.
Do signatures from the warehouse t-rex in a spaceship count?
Was it wearing sparkling tap shoes?
I didn't see. It was in a spaceship.
I roll the dice. 6 of ducks, 12 of hearts, -29231958123, a platypus, and 27. Hmmm. That means that I can pass go, don't go, do go, go left, go away, and gogo in one move. Because of the triple go cheating rule, I gain twelve ducks and 2 gold coins.
*WHISTLE* 4 minutes before Midnight! All play must cease for exactly one boomerang. Next shoe to be tied with one hand is awarded 2 eggs per loop.
Can I pay the referee two pinnacles to reverse the double chaining of the Zorg beast?
Thread necromancy! Triple points!
If I'm remembering my official rulebook correctly, all exponential scores must be expressed in the form of an interpretive dance. Let's see it.
Hm... I'll allow it.
Which gets me bonus points for acting like a referee while not being a referee.
Yes, but according to page 63 of the rulebook you're holding, "Every rule in this book is to be not used during play". I get bonus points for adding a paradox to the rules, as according to page 64.
Actually, we're playing by 2nd Edition Calvinball rules. No paradox modifiers, I'm afraid.
I could've sworn we had 86'' Mortimer adjustment.