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So I know I'm kind of late with introducing myself as I've been somewhat active on other parts of the message boards, but I figure I should do so anyway.
I'm a bisexual male gamer, age 26. I sincerely believe in my Roman Catholic faith, though not the people in the upper echelons of power. You could say I've become wise to how something with a good core can become twisted by people into a mockery of its professed values. I don't really have any interesting bits of personal life to share as I'm not really "out" about my bisexuality nor do I particularly feel a need to be.
I would write down Polish proverb about three grades of truth
Could you PM me the original Polish saying? It sounds like an interesting one that I haven't heard before.
Welcome to the thread!
Also, it should be noted that until very recently, the law required anyone who juridically transitioned should be sterilized (even if there where no medical issues with them getting kids) and any saved eggs/sperm be destroyed:O
That's an absolute abomination. What was the medical or ethical rationale used to even vaguely attempt to rationalize that? That's horrific. :(
The rationale was basically "well if you're trans you shouldn't want to be able to have kids" or something to that effect. There was actually quite intensive lobbying against it not only by reactionary christians (and other reactionaries like the neo-fascist Sverigedemokraterna), but also from a group of trans men who claim to represent trans people in general.
But Sweden has a long and large history of forced sterilizations (and things like lobotomy etc), this was (I believe and hope) the last remnant of it.
I'm a bisexual male gamer, age 26. I sincerely believe in my Roman Catholic faith, though not the people in the upper echelons of power. You could say I've become wise to how something with a good core can become twisted by people into a mockery of its professed values. I don't really have any interesting bits of personal life to share as I'm not really "out" about my bisexuality nor do I particularly feel a need to be.
If I may make a suggestion, there are reasons why you may want to be out, even if you don't expect to be in a same-sex relationship in the future (e.g. you're already married or otherwise in a committed relationship you expect to last).
You may be the only person within the LGBTQ spectrum that some of your family members are in contact with, and coming out will help them understand that LGBTQ people aren't the family-destroying monsters the Family Research Council make them out to be.
You may not expect to be in a same-sex relationship, but life has a way of laughing at our expectations. If you do find yourself in one, it will be easier to say, "Mom, dad, this is my boyfriend," than "Mom, dad, I'm bi and this is my boyfriend".
Women may find a bi guy attractive, for instance, my wife enjoys appreciating sexy men (and women) with me. Finding such women will be easier if you're out, rather than closeted.
Health: Out gay people have been studied to have lower stress hormone levels than either closeted gay people OR straight men. Both closeted gay men and straight men are stressed out attempting to be seen as straight, and afraid of being perceived as gay or effeminate. Coming out will make you less stressed, statistically.
I get what Paladin of Baha-who is saying, and they make some good points, but I think each individual person is the best judge of whether they should be out or not, or the degree to which they're out. For example, I'm glad I made the decision to be an out trans person, and it's been a good thing for me, but I can't say that the same decision would work for another trans person (safety issues, etc.).
So i cant let my Fiance speak for me when i'm to shy or paranoid to? I have high paranoia and bipolar disorder. So i cant always bring myself to talk and he talks for me when i'm to paranoid about speaking. -lets out a sigh- I dont even get to see the responses either.
Not everyone is a strong enough person to always speak for themselves....
I just wanted to say that for someone like me especially if it has to do with me. I would be more comfortable knowing what was said before it was removed....
I dont know if i will speak up again in the forums knowing how paranoid i am and that i wont be accepted. Especially since me and my fiance like to keep our accounts as something that is you know seperate. Especially since he phrases things differently then i do and so forth.
It took me alot of courage to even create my own account and speak up and ask questions. Not knowing what was said but knowing something was said about something having to do with me. It doesn't make me feel comfortable and welcome. Infact it makes my paranoia quite high wire.
I wish everyone a nice and happy day and life for i dont know if i will be posting anymore in the forums. I hope relationships surgeries or whatever you do to make you happy goes smoothly and well and inevetilbly lead to what will lead you to a better life.
Methinks I'll be bowing out of this thread for a while, like I originally planned to. It does not feel good to have a couple hour discussion with your fiance whom you're living with, and spend the better part of an hour writing a more eloquent way of putting her thoughts in an attempt to make it as least abrasive as possible (Like I've said before, she's a very blunt and to-the-point woman)... And it gets removed.
Thanks for trying to cheer her up guys. I'll be lurking around the rest of the forums myself. Either way, did email the community@paizo about it asking for at least a transcript of what was removed. Hopefully they can get me one so I can nip her paranoia in the bud.
So, yeah. Luck to all, best wishes, merry Christmas/happy Hanuka/happy Kwanza/whatever you celebrate.
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Hey Artemis and Tarinia, I sincerely apologize if this was taken as a personal slight. There's been some misinterpretation on our part and we'll be responding to you via email with further clarification as soon as we're able so as to not derail the thread further.
I am extremely disappointed. I have no better words to convey the level of disappointment I feel for this kneejerk reaction. I know for one I felt a little better after being heard, and now I feel dirty about it. If "we" won't try to hear and understand others, what right do "we" have to the same?
I'm out to for a while. I've little left that I can think of contributing to this thread right now. Good luck everyone.
Artemis/Tarinia, feel free to continue PMing me to talk about this stuff if you want to.
Ashiel,
Given that Chris has said the posts that were deleted were deleted due to a misinterpretation, and that Paizo is reaching out directly to both of them via email, I think it's best to wait and see how things go at the moment. Leaving the thread like you're doing seems to compound the misunderstanding, in my opinion. Obviously, you should do as you see fit, but, respectfully, I'd still suggest waiting a bit before moving on that.
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Ashiel,
Given that Chris has said the posts that were deleted were deleted due to a misinterpretation, and that Paizo is reaching out directly to both of them via email, I think it's best to wait and see how things go at the moment. Leaving the thread like you're doing seems to compound the misunderstanding, in my opinion. Obviously, you should do as you see fit, but, respectfully, I'd still suggest waiting a bit before moving on that.
I'll wait and see I guess. It still bothers me though. This is the reason that I don't touch the flagging button most of the time. Short of someone being all like "**** you and **** your mother, brother, and dog too, you lousy **** ****** piece of **** **** *** ~!31 ** 43*!!@!#D:<" (and then probably if it's directed towards someone else and not me :P), I'm very hesitant to flag stuff because I may not have understood it. Even when someone is being insulting to me personally, I generally let it slide (I'm quicker to flag something insulting someone else, but generally I think the right thing to do is call people on their misbehavior because that's how social development works).
All too often I feel like the flagging system just gets abused to stifle conversations, to censor things that aren't innately terrible but the flagger doesn't agree with, like, or makes them personally uncomfortable (and let's face it, we can be made uncomfortable by virtually anything if we allow ourselves to be).
In this case I saw someone who was actively trying to better understand and explain where their position was. Some commented they weren't sure if it was trolling or not (because some of the questions were potentially hot topics), and I even said "No it's not trolling, let's give it a chance" and that was all for naught. Maybe I should have been like "This post is legit, I've got PMs asking about things from a similar vein, and can even see where some of the feedback I provided ended up in the post addressing everyone," but hindsight is 20/20 as they say.
It's one of the reasons I generally steer clear from stuff like this. I'm not fond of the "us" and "they" mentality and I might have been slipping into it here. I don't know. I just feel maybe it would be best for me to return to the "neutral observer who points out what s/he feels is logical problems in heavy discussions". It might just be easier to have a real conversation with people if I don't identify as anything. It often gets me painted as a bigot but at least I know I'm not representing people other than myself.
Anyway, good thread overall KSF. Best of wishes now and forever.
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I really appreciate everyone involved in the last few pages. I've been away from the boards for a while because of work, but I still check this thread from time to time, and I really appreciate all of you for being so vocal about something that I'm still figuring out myself.
That said, I've been out to myself, my wife, and my therapist for the last few months; if I can manage to get them out of their house, I'm going to come out to my mom and sister at lunch tomorrow.
Thanks to all of you, I'm confidant that I'll be able to handle all of their awkward and well-meaning-but-really-offensive questions.
Despite that, wish me luck D:
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Good luck!
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Best of luck to you, pumpkin head.
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I hope it goes really well=)
@ Tarinia and Artemis please don't go away, sorry if we made y'all feel uncomfortable.
For myself nothing that was asked or said offended me(though I will admit to being really confused by the last long post by Artemis that got deleted)
I invite you to stay and ask your questions.
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Good luck, Tirisfal! Hope it goes well!
I'll wait and see I guess. It still bothers me though. This is the reason that I don't touch the flagging button most of the time. Short of someone being all like "**** you and **** your mother, brother, and dog too, you lousy **** ****** piece of **** **** *** ~!31 ** 43*!!@!#D:<" (and then probably if it's directed towards someone else and not me :P), I'm very hesitant to flag stuff because I may not have understood it. Even when someone is being insulting to me personally, I generally let it slide (I'm quicker to flag something insulting someone else, but generally I think the right thing to do is call people on their misbehavior because that's how social development works).
All too often I feel like the flagging system just gets abused to stifle conversations, to censor things that aren't innately terrible but the flagger doesn't agree with, like, or makes them personally uncomfortable (and let's face it, we can be made uncomfortable by virtually anything if we allow ourselves to be).
In this case I saw someone who was actively trying to better understand and explain where their position was. Some commented they weren't sure if it was trolling or not (because some of the questions were potentially hot topics), and I even said "No it's not trolling, let's give it a chance" and that was all for naught. Maybe I should have been like "This post is legit, I've got PMs asking about things from a similar vein, and can even see where some of the feedback I provided ended up in the post addressing everyone," but hindsight is 20/20 as they say.
It's one of the reasons I generally steer clear from stuff like this. I'm not fond of the "us" and "they" mentality and I might have been slipping into it here. I don't know. I just feel maybe it would be best for me to return to the "neutral observer who points out what s/he feels is logical problems in heavy discussions". It might just be easier to have a real conversation with people if I don't identify as anything. It often gets me painted as a bigot but at least I know I'm not representing people other than myself.
Anyway, good thread overall KSF. Best of wishes now and forever.
Ashiel, I understand this feedback and it's definitely got to look "off" from the outside. However, we are humans here and flags don't inherently mean we'll respond to a post. Sometimes we misstep, and we keep striving for better and more open communication on this front. This is one of those cases we could have done better. If you have ideas for areas we can improve on, or suggestions for what we can do differently, please drop us a line at community@paizo.com or post to the Website Feedback forum. Let's get this thread back to it's topic though :)
Aaaaannnd my confidence was for nothing :/
I couldn't get them out of the house, and this was the only day off I was going to have for a while >:(
Still, thank you all for the support <3
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Aaaaannnd my confidence was for nothing :/
I couldn't get them out of the house, and this was the only day off I was going to have for a while >:(
Still, thank you all for the support <3
You could also try writing a letter. That's what I did. Wrote it out, sent it in the mail, then called my mother and brother and let them know there was an important letter on the way and I'd call them in a couple days (or however long it'd take the letter to arrive for you).
Just a thought.
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This could be big news. The Supreme Court will hear the Louisiana same sex marriage case.
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This could be big news. The Supreme Court will hear the Louisiana same sex marriage case.
This is big news: [SCotUSblog] "Court won’t add to delay of Florida same-sex marriages"... so, barring something unexpected, Florida clerks can start issuing same-sex marriage licenses starting January 6th.
Florida. Here? Here. Holy s!$&!
Holy s!&& is right; what're you going to say when mom starts hinting about you getting married?!
{PANICS}
Holy s%!+ is right; what're you going to say when mom starts hinting about you getting married?!
{PANICS}
So the excuse not to get married went down the drain? ;)
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Hey, just to briefly introduce myself: I'm Pete, a gay male gamer and writer. I've loved Pathfinder for a long time, and now I want to get more involved in these forums.
I noticed you talking about the state of Gay Marriage laws in the US. It's clear that SCotUS is moving towards getting gay marriage legal all over the United States. It's an exciting time. Now I just hope other LGBTQQIAA issues don't take as long to see their day in the legislative/legal spotlight.
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Holy s!~% is right; what're you going to say when mom starts hinting about you getting married?!
{PANICS}
Stand up, spontaneously burst into song and dance, and keep it up until she forgets the topic.
I've gotten out of eleven marriage discussions, six arranged dates, three baby showers, two weddings, and a very uncomfortable Christmas dinner with family I hate that way.
Though, I was tempted with that last arranged date. The guy was just that cute. Sadly, he spent more time spelunking the waitress's cleavage than paying attention to what was going on, so I kinda suspect he had no idea why he was really there.
Hey, just to briefly introduce myself: I'm Pete, a gay male gamer and writer. I've loved Pathfinder for a long time, and now I want to get more involved in these forums.
I noticed you talking about the state of Gay Marriage laws in the US. It's clear that SCotUS is moving towards getting gay marriage legal all over the United States. It's an exciting time. Now I just hope other LGBTQQIAA issues don't take as long to see their day in the legislative/legal spotlight.
Welcome!
Actually, for civil rights, gay marriage proceeded rapidly for the U.S. Both civil rights and women's right to vote were being fought for from the late 1700s. Gay marriage, as a fight, hasn't even lasted fifty years yet. So I'm hoping that is a sign of us being in an era where rapid change on a societal level actually is possible and everything else will advance as well.
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This could be big news. The Supreme Court will hear the Louisiana same sex marriage case.This is big news: [SCotUSblog] "Court won’t add to delay of Florida same-sex marriages"... so, barring something unexpected, Florida clerks can start issuing same-sex marriage licenses starting January 6th.
Florida. Here? Here. Holy s$!%!
Holy s&~~ is right; what're you going to say when mom starts hinting about you getting married?!
{PANICS}
Maaybe you could say you've sworn never to wed anyone who cannot best you in single combat? (nb: I'm aware that there may be a couple of tiny flaws in that plan...)
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Holy s!~% is right; what're you going to say when mom starts hinting about you getting married?!
{PANICS}
Stand up, spontaneously burst into song and dance, and keep it up until she forgets the topic.
I've gotten out of eleven marriage discussions, six arranged dates, three baby showers, two weddings, and a very uncomfortable Christmas dinner with family I hate that way.
Though, I was tempted with that last arranged date. The guy was just that cute. Sadly, he spent more time spelunking the waitress's cleavage than paying attention to what was going on, so I kinda suspect he had no idea why he was really there.
That sounds like me. Have we met someplace once upon a time?
I'm so totally clueless and my eyes wander everywhere. Disadvantage of being bi is that it's relatively easy to piss of both gay men and straight women and not even realize it. My wife laughs at me all the time when she catches me eying up some guy I haven't a prayer of ever meeting let alone getting involved with.
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What do you do if the medusa tells you "Eyes up here, mister!"?
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"I can't... My spine calcified in this way."
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I've been aware of this thread for a while as I've been more or less lurking on Paizo since 2008. But, when I entered Superstar this year, Chris and the wonderful CS folks were able to change my account name so now I'm more comfortable posting. :D
Hi, I'm Karyn, and I'm transgender. :D
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Welcome!
RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 32
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Welcome, vgmaster 831 and Kiraya!
Since it's been blowing up around on Tumblr I figured I'd ask here, for those who watched a good portion of the show how did you feel about the series finale of Legend of Korra?
Great, because it's canon as hell. I'm so down with this ship, I'm basically the band on the Titanic.