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Sovereign Court

Guess it was a false alarm then. Carry on IHIYC.

*Wonders about how anyone could survive the closet, then thinks about Sissyl's closet and what horrors truly lay within, only to shudder at the thought.*


I had a temp job as a fur coat in Sissyl's closet once, and in my opinion, you're all making a lot of fuss about nothing. My stint as a tutti frutti hat was less enjoyable, but that's at least partially my fault.


She needs to take better care of her pokeballs too.


Heh. Admittedly. Still, it's a long way to FaWTL6 city gym, doncha know?


Its ok I learned entangle recently should be all good.


All right.

Oh look! A wild Pulg appears!

Vidmaster7, I CHOOSE YOU!

We gonna need some xp here.


Uh against Pulg? You know their is no way we will ever be able to get our hair untangled again?


I can always recall you. Worst comes to worst, you become a VidPulg.


I don't think I can properly express how much I do not want to become a Vidpulg (at least my names first). no offense Pulg


You would only evolve into a Pulgvid if it was Friday. Don't worry.


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lousy next gen mechanics muddying the water.


S
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h
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f
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m
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Right, Vid, let's see what you're made of.

{Takes off jacket, assumes pugilistic (pulgilistic?) stance. Telephone rings}

Excuse me a second.

"Ahoy ahoy? Oh, hello, GoatToucher.

Yes, that's right.

No. No, that is NOT what 'pokeballs' means.

I don't care if you do have video evidence to the contrary. However, I believe that the FBI are interested in having a little word with you on that same subject...

Yes, you too, and the goat you came in on."

So sorry. Now, let battle commence!

Sovereign Court

*Looks baffled at Pulg while he battles Vidmaster7.*

And you didn't delete his number/block him from contacting you why?

*Phone rings, answers it.*

"Hello? Ah, GoatToucher, how are you?"

"I'm sorry, what about the FBI? They want to talk to you?"

"You're going to be away for a while and need me to look after your workroom? OK, I can do that."

"You're quite welcome, take care now, goodbye!"

*Hangs up the phone, sees everyone's shocked faces.*

What? I don't have a problem with GoatToucher. Besides, he gave me a lifetime membership to all of his yoga classes.

Scarab Sages

*ClosetPhone rings, answers it.*

"Hello? Why, GoatToucher, how ever did you get this number?"

"Huh! I didn't know you could pray for those! But wait, weren't you defrocked...?"

"Ohhhh, that's what you mean...HA. Pact Magic. You sly dog."

"Frankly, I was wondering what took them this long. Listen closely, here's what you do: You take them, and Scotland Yard, and either the Bundespolizei or Carabinieri (but not both), and the MSS, and Grupo Alacrán and Detachment 88 if you can (neither is better than one in their case), and Shin Bet in any case just for good measure, and you set them all against each other!"

"Yes, believe me, they all have Closets...."

"What?"

*retracts phone from side of head, looks at it for a moment*

"Why, as a matter of fact, it IS a banana!"

"If you want to go figure that one out, I'm not stopping you."

*puts banana back on hook*

*Hangs up the phone, sees everyone's shocked faces.*

Scarab Sages

I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:

*Hangs up the phone, sees everyone's shocked faces.*

Ap-cray; ix-nay on the ypo-tay epeating-ray Ount-cay Eydrich-hay. Eriously-say.


*throws phone*

Just in case...


Count Reiner Heydrich wrote:

*Looks baffled at Pulg while he battles Vidmaster7.*

And you didn't delete his number/block him from contacting you why?

{Sounds of Deadley Combat}

SPLABLATT!

BRAAANG!

FIDDLYDUMPH!

WOOOF!

SPOOOO!

In answer to your question, have you any idea how difficult it is otherwise to find rubberwear in my size?


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* hands the Count a glass of fine wine *

Looks like quite a fight brewing.

* opens IHIYC's closet door and offers him a glass of fine wine *

Care to join us in watching the battle?


Count Reiner Heydrich wrote:
*Wonders about how anyone could survive the closet, then thinks about Sissyl's closet and what horrors truly lay within, only to shudder at the thought.*

When I came out of the closet, it was Sissyl's closet. Take that for what it's worth.

It was quite nice in there.

As for the phone calls, I have had some adventures! Come see what I have collected!

:Takes out two sacks bearing the emblem of what appears to be a grocery store, but the name is written in an alphabet you don't recognize, and looking at it too long gives you a nosebleed. He sets the sacks on a table, one with a metallic clatter, the other with a wet thump:

:dumps out the first back, spilling out several dozen FBI badges:

That was a fun afternoon!

:glances at the other bag, then looks at you conspiratorially:

Scrotums. Well, scrota if you want to be technical.

:glances about at a number of seemingly aghast observers:

Don't worry. I didn't kill anyone.

:lets that sink in a moment:

:reaches into a pocket, producing a Pokeball:

:flings the ball at VidMaster's feet:

Bulette! I choose you!

:there is an explosion of flesh and bone as the body of a two ton beast is released from a four inch diameter ball. The pressure was considerable, and those within a ten foot radius are covered with gore and peppered with bone shards:

He did -not- want to get into the ball, let me tell you.

Scarab Sages

Grandpa Wonderbra wrote:


* opens IHIYC's closet door and offers him a glass of fine wine *

*stretches arm out to ridiculous length, takes wine glass from behind Grandpa Wonderbra*

Over here, pal; I'm Hiding In YOUR Closet, not mine!


I'm Hiding In Your Closet wrote:
Grandpa Wonderbra wrote:


* opens IHIYC's closet door and offers him a glass of fine wine *

*stretches arm out to ridiculous length, takes wine glass from behind Grandpa Wonderbra*

Over here, pal; I'm Hiding In YOUR Closet, not mine!

* removes glasses *

Oh dear, these are filthy.

* cleans glasses and puts them back on *

Why so you are. My mistake.

Then who is that hiding in your closet?

Scarab Sages

GoatToucher wrote:


:Takes out two sacks bearing the emblem of what appears to be a grocery store, but the name is written in an alphabet you don't recognize, and looking at it too long gives you a nosebleed:

"Trader Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndropwllllantysiliogogogoch's"? I don't know, am I the only one who's bored with that place?


Grandpa Wonderbra wrote:

Then who is that hiding in your closet?

*GRAB*


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GoatToucher wrote:


As for the phone calls, I have had some adventures! Come see what I have collected!

:Takes out two sacks bearing the emblem of what appears to be a grocery store, but the name is written in an alphabet you don't recognize, and looking at it too long gives you a nosebleed. He sets the sacks on a table, one with a metallic clatter, the other with a wet thump:

:dumps out the first back, spilling out several dozen FBI badges:

That was a fun afternoon!

:glances at the other bag, then looks at you conspiratorially:

Scrotums. Well, scrota if you want to be technical.

:glances about at a number of seemingly aghast observers:

Don't worry. I didn't kill anyone.
.

THWOP!

WUBWUBWUB!

SKROINGGG!

AKH!

I don't know which surprises me more, that FBI agents have metal b@$*~$&s, or that their badges are wet and squishy. Still, every day's a school day on GoatToucher Island.

Oi, Vid, no biting or gouging.

Sovereign Court

Thank you for the wine, Grandpa Wonderbra, it tastes most exquisite.

*Enjoys a good, hearty sip.*

This is quite the match, indeed. Though I think Pulg needs to remember that in a real fight, it's anything goes.

*Watches the fight and reminisces about being in GoatToucher's workroom while the individual in question was away and recalls seeing the figure that was once Doktor Verruckte strapped to a chair and begins talking about it.*

And there he was: pale grey skin, mouth agape, eyes clouded up, hair all long and silvery, nails were elongated and he just looked dead, but I knew he wasn't. I inspected him (without touching him) and thought aloud to myself "at least he's clean". That was when I saw a tangerine on the tray next to him, as I was going to pick it up, I heard this silent scream coming from him before everything went quiet. Feeling a bit sympathetic, I left the tangerine where it was and I exited the workroom.


*BLAM*

*SNAP*

No gouging? How is that fair? That and biteing are like my main two moves I mean sissyl is my trainer after all!


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Vidmaster7, use GOUGE!!!


*uses GOUGE!!!*


Vid, that's rouge.

Never mind. I am looking a bit pallid.


Why, Pulg - have you been fighting? You are wounded! Come, let us soothe your hurts with epoxy resin and Bovril!


Ah, thankyou, my dears - you are too good to me, and who knows - while grooming my luxuriant pelt, you may happen upon three tickets to the 'Simply Red' concert tomorrow night!


*looks at sissyl confused*


Ah... but I am high enough level and I have the Banana split badge...

Well, another try.

Vidmaster7, use Outdated meme!


*Outdated meme attack!*


Pulg! Use Unrelenting Lavage!


Well, all this pine scented floor cleaner has got to go somewhere, I suppose.

Sovereign Court

*Recoils in horror, as if suddenly exposed to sunlight.*

Keep that floor cleaner away from me!

*Hops a chair, hisses aggressively.*

The smell! It's so horrendous, so revolting, so, so CHEAP!


I think he got distracted and wondered off...


You might be right.

I always wondered why I have never been attacked by vampires, and it turns out that I can thank the car air fresheners I'm festooned with for that. Who knew, eh?


Are they garlic scented?


Nope. All car air fresheners have a scent which is unique to them. Only a true connoisseur (hallo) can tell them apart.


You have quite the exuberant sniffer eh?

*attack with small talk*


Do Pulgs have blood?


I think if you get past the hair its just more hair.


I have liquid hair running through my veins. It seeps out of my pores and then solidifies on contact with the atmosphere.

Sovereign Court

Let me guess, when you get super cold, your liquid hair crystallizes inside of your body which causes intense pain.

*Hands Vidmaster7 a ray gun that shoots out beams of ice.*

With regards to the floor cleaner (and a few other things), it's not the substance itself but, the cheap quality of the product. Why else do vampires only associate themselves with finery?


Ha! Ha! Whatever doesn't kill me, makes me stronger!

Smell stronger, that is, pine scent notwithstanding.

*Reeks silently in a corner*

Scarab Sages

Pathfinder Battles Case Subscriber; Pathfinder Maps, Pathfinder Accessories Subscriber; Pathfinder Roleplaying Game Superscriber
Vidmaster7 wrote:
*Outdated meme attack!*

Your attack would have been better if you had only used this twist.


Well had my goal been to FWOOSH pulg then yes quite.

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