... only writes in passive sentences.
(And...)
... uses multiple adverbs in each one.
... executes courtiers for not wearing chartreuse.
... executes courtiers for not wearing chartreuse.
- and he never tells them which one beforehand.
... marries pretty young princesses to farm implements against their will. (Think you got it tough, little princess that is married to an old, bitter man? That princess over there is married to a rusty old grain elevator!)
... hacks into people's message boards accounts and switches around its and it's; their, they're, and there, as well as your and you're.
... enforces encumbrance rules
... always puts paladins into moral dilemmas where they will always lose their powers.
... tells "your momma" jokes to the kids in an orphanage.
... sneaks up on sleeping people to shout "DON'T WAKE UP!!" into their ears. (which, as we all know, leads to massive cranial bleeding from the sheer paradox)
... replaces gherkins with cucumbers on hamburgers
... put nekkid women into violent computer games to corrupt innocent little children.
...actual had to father himself as no mere mortal could sire something so evil. Also had sever oedipal issues.
... teaches teenagers to chat in 733tspeak.
... asked out the girl you wanted to go to Prom with.
... left her an emotional basket case, so when she finally did go out with you, you spent the evening talking about what a jerk he was.
... convinced the network that Firefly needed to be replaced with more reality TV.
... switched your homepage picture for the one with the bad hair.
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...ate the 3rd edition worg and that weird thing that is supposed to be the worg as previewed on the D&D website came out!
Best. Thread. Ever.
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...wears bunny slippers... by shoving his feet into the mouths of real bunnies.
Wears bunny slippers ... but uses another route
...doesn't have room for Jell-O.
wrote, directed, and produced Dungeons & Dragons(1983) and Dungeons & Dragons(2000). He also used his powers to convinve TSR to hire Rose Estes.
Mike
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Contributor
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...wears bunny slippers... by shoving his feet into the mouths of real bunnies.Wears bunny slippers ... but uses another route
*shudder*
... is the DM.
...gave me the idea to castrate a paladin and hand the, you know, over to the main villain to use for scrying while whispering sweet nothings in my ear.
But now he never calls back.
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...is played by David Warner in the movie adaptation.
"No one created me! I am Evil. Evil existed long before good. I made myself. I cannot be unmade. *I* am all powerful!" -Time Bandits (1981)
...ate the 3rd edition worg and that weird thing that is supposed to be the worg as previewed on the D&D website came out!
WHAT IN THE LORDS NAME IS THAT THING- IT LOOKS LIKE AN OSQUIP-DOG!
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WHAT IN THE LORDS NAME IS THAT THING- IT LOOKS LIKE AN OSQUIP-DOG!...ate the 3rd edition worg and that weird thing that is supposed to be the worg as previewed on the D&D website came out!
Or a Runehound. Not a worg anyway.
... is a chronic close-talker.
And low-talker. And high-talker.
...ate the 3rd edition worg and that weird thing that is supposed to be the worg as previewed on the D&D website came out!
What the flying ****? "Wizards - making D&D different because we can"
... teaches teenagers to chat in 733tspeak.
Teetspeak? Sounds naughty.
... shot the deputy.
... framed Roger Rabbit.
... gives Nick Logue the creeps.
... Has created a spell powered by love. The BM-way.
... let the dog's out
... came up with SETI@home.
....always spells "rogue" as "rouge".
HEY!!!
... Made StarWars Episodes 1-3 as well as Matrix 2-3.
...but his MAGNUM OPUS was several sequels to Highlander.
... is Paris Hilton's publicity agent, and responsible for bringing Paris into our lives on a daily basis.
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...ate the 3rd edition worg and that weird thing that is supposed to be the worg as previewed on the D&D website came out!What the flying ****? "Wizards - making D&D different because we can"
...gave Wizards and/or Hasbro the idea to move 4e away from everything that WotC didn't directly invent so they can make more money off it with licenses.
...is the actual ghost writer of 4e.
...writes the code for Diebold' voting machines.
He invented the joke, "Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead prostitutes?"
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I've got this one.
I don't have a ferrari in my garage.
-Tarlane
Similar in spirit to the opening joke at the serial killer convention in Sandman: The Doll's House. Paraphrased-
A 911 operator get a call from a woman in hysterics.
"Help! Send the police! I'm being reaped!" the woman cries.
"Don't you mean raped?" asks the 911 operator.
"No," says the woman "He's using a sythe!"
... took the ram back out of the ram-a-lam-a-ding-dong
...eats jello pudding pops made from only the best parts of Bill Cosby
He invented the joke, "Whats the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead prostitutes?"
Reminds me of the "what's the difference between a Mercedes and a pile of manure?" one?
Or "What's the difference between a Motorcicle?" (the more horsepower it has, the vroom)
Back to old double-you-tee:
... he cheers for the bad guys. On the news.
... he frames people for petty crimes.
... in 1993 he devised the formula of how rare cards were distributed in Magic the Gathering boosters. When creepy old geeks cheated little kids out of good cards, he laughed and laughed.
... convinced Lucas to add Ewoks to RotJ.
Oh yeah, and the f~%!er's gonna pay for that one someday. Grrrr.
... he started the rumor about spider eggs being in bubble gum, and when the frevor died down, and people consigned to a mere urban myth, he went actually did it.
...hired Mothers Against D&D to campaign in the 1980s against the game that created him in the 2000s.
...hired Mothers Against D&D to campaign in the 1980s against the game that created him in the 2000s.
LOL!!
...tries to get all his friends to play a game called "Mazes & Monsters".