What can I do with a Dire Crocodile head?


Advice


So - our GM pretty much just chucked a Dire Croc at our poor L5 party, and after some tug-of-war and much summoning of pony fodder, we managed to get through it intact.

My PC got super excited about the whole thing - and is now currently lugging around a massive Dire Croc head as a trophy. But, what can I do with it? Would the teeth be useful for something alchemical ingredients that I am missing out on, weird spell components, anything?

RPG Superstar Season 9 Top 16

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Sick hat, bro.


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Depending on your alignment, sell individual teeth in jewelry form as protection from outsider, grind teeth in to powder and sell it as an aphrodisiac, et cetera. If there are barbarian tribes in your game world see if you can barter the head for something useful, I can't think of spell or alchemical components off of the top of my head.

Or make up a back story and charge 1 cp to see the head of the demon/devil croc that you rescued a child from being eaten, or virgin sacrifice. Just a thought.

Scarab Sages

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Shave its back with a rusty razor,
shave its back with a rusty razor,
shave its back with a rusty razor,
early in the mor-ning!

What can you do with a crocodile,
What can you do with a crocodile,
What can you do with a crocodile,
early in the morning?

Grind it into a vile narcotic,
grind it into a vile narcotic,
grind it into a vile narcotic,
early in the...sorry.

Maybe you could offer to sell it to various pirate ships who could make it into one hell of a figurehead? Try to start a bidding war.


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Do a craft check to make it into a masterwork tool for Perform (puppetshow)?

That seems like it could get you money.


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If you somehow can make a construct, attach it as the head.


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In the Black Company books, two of the characters bought a giant croc head and made it into a headdress for their commander to wear to scare the crap out of local river pirates. With the use of some illusions and protection magic, he was breathing fire and shrugging off arrows. Be creative with it man. Make it into a crazy backpack and haggle with your DM that it gives you extra AC from behind BECAUSE IT'S A CROCS HEAD! Those things can deflect bullets! Or make it into a shield. Or a primitive but still effective half plate armor. Hook up with a gnome with a passion for tinkering and a sense of humor and get it mounted on a magi-tech submarine.

Scarab Sages

Paint it yellow and reanimate it as a beheaded - Woooockawockawocka!!!


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Decorate your beach side tourist shop?


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Animate object and you've got one that pretty much uses the original crocs bite attack instead of the standard construct slam, just without its BAB from the hit dice? If you can animate it as a beheaded it'd be just as deadly.
Unfortunately the hat ideas wouldn't work believably. After all, isn't it like, a meter long?


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Y'know, my initial idea was to use it as part of a chinese dragon-style thing, where you pop into the head and just walk around town. Nothing like giving the locals a show!

Based on my (admittedly) rather limited resources, I am leaning towards just hollowing the thing out as much as possible and making it into a backpack. Especially considering the size of it - the entry states that this thing is capable of eating horses with a bite, so the head is rather big and heavy (right now it still has brains etc in it, and is weighing like 300 pounds, hahaha) - it should just barely fit on my back.

That, and keeping it as a backpack should still retain the original form, so I can still animate it should I ever reach that high of a spell level! :)

Scarab Sages

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You could go all Monster Hunter with it and turn it into some thematic weapons/armor. People always make a big stink about harvesting things for alchemical components, but I often find that's more wishful thinking than anything else.

Alternatively, you could ask your DM about turning it into an improved version of a Bear Trap. It'd still be useful, and would let the poor croc keep doing his thing from beyond the grave without actually making him undead.


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Uh, a Dire Crocodile is 20x20. Its head is at least as big as a PC, and probably two. How are you even carrying this around?


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Level 5 party? And no one animated the thing and turned it into a zombie submarine yet?

We all live in a zombie submarine!
a zombie submarine
a zombie submarine


mplindustries wrote:
Uh, a Dire Crocodile is 20x20. Its head is at least as big as a PC, and probably two. How are you even carrying this around?

Definitely a point.

How about this. Strengthen the lower part of the head, add wheels and an axle, get something to pull it that is appropriately large, reptilian and fierce looking and you have an extremely intimidating, unique and stylish vehicle.


StDrake wrote:

Animate object and you've got one that pretty much uses the original crocs bite attack instead of the standard construct slam, just without its BAB from the hit dice? If you can animate it as a beheaded it'd be just as deadly.

Unfortunately the hat ideas wouldn't work believably. After all, isn't it like, a meter long?

Animate it and attach it to a building infrint of the door. People you want walk in the open mouth to the door. Salesmen get chewed...


Soup's on!

Sovereign Court

Could pull a metal gear solid. And wear it as a hat. Stealth + in water.
Spiked tower shield? Bone throwing daggers? Food for a dire wolf? Suit of crocodile hide armor


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Experiment 626 wrote:

Level 5 party? And no one animated the thing and turned it into a zombie submarine yet?

We all live in a zombie submarine!
a zombie submarine
a zombie submarine

You are a monster.

And I approve.

That's 2 votes for the zombie croc.


mplindustries wrote:
Uh, a Dire Crocodile is 20x20. Its head is at least as big as a PC, and probably two. How are you even carrying this around?

20 STR and Muleback Cords ;)


Pounce wrote:
mplindustries wrote:
Uh, a Dire Crocodile is 20x20. Its head is at least as big as a PC, and probably two. How are you even carrying this around?
20 STR and Muleback Cords ;)

I don't mean the Strength to carry it, I mean the leverage. You won't be able to keep it off the ground unless you have a cart or something. Your best case is probably dragging it around, which will pretty quickly destroy it.


Go get the body and animate it into a dire croc flesh golem.

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