Sadly, the foreign bodies on the rubber duckie are so virulent that they infect IHIYC through his psychic touch.
Within the next ten minutes, he experiences mild headaches and nausea before his skull cracks open, revealing brain matter teeming with worms as thick as your thumb.
Death is far from instantaneous, and involves a great deal of shambling around, attempting to ask for help when his fine motor skills are too degraded to allow for speech. Several hours later, it mercifully ends.
*shanks GoatToucher, then lights him on fire*
Watches_from_a_safe_distance_as_the_smoke_from_GoatToucher's_body_infects_G oblin_Kid.
Watches on from another planet as he launches several EMPs at Drone-On, before destroying the body with several antimatter bombs, along with destroying the rest of earth.
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I remind DM Forgedawn his horde was on the Earth and he just destroyed it. The shock causes him to have a massive hearth attack, killing him.
I cast a Maximised Heat Metal spell on Uncle Teddy's helmet.
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Gate to the Negative Energy Plane, because your not an undead monstrosity!
In the spirit of the thread, pulls out ten light sabers, and uses all of them in a weird reality-bending moment to slice vidmaster7 into tiny pieces.
Demonstrates the impracticality of lightsabers as a futuristic weapon by simply spotting for an orbital laser strike that vaporizes the Game Hamster, lightsabers, and everything else within five meters.
Teleports Iron Federation Drone within 5 meters of GH
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*eats tiny amounts of arsenic every day for years, then shares a load of arsenic-containing candy with Kileanna*
Killing someone should be a work of dedication.
*Saws Sissyl in half, while singing 'The Pearl Fishers' by Bizet*
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-pation.
I have a servant drill a hole in the jester's closet, seal tight the door, and pour through the funnel a stream of tiny rotgrubs.
(just like to say FF does that play around ouch)
So he will be shackled to a good aligned holy symbol Then slowly shot to death by lantern archons while they sing him a overly catchy tune the whole time.
While the red devil seems occupied being on the receiving end of pain, i can now test out my new plasma rifle on mr Vidmaster7.
[Krrr-zapppp!]
Works perfectly.
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Ill Omen + Prediction of Failure + Evil Eye + Bestow Curse to cause you to misfire the Plasma Rifle and explode at your hands.
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After i fired it at Vidmaster, that is.
The previous is unlucky by default 1st.
-----------------------
After getting a thorough recovery, i hang Kileanna by her ears over a chasm. As her ears will only hold for a few seconds...well, have a nice drop.
So that's how she got her ear-antennae! Who'd think that?
*Replaces her ears for pinecones*
*Then replaces Wylliam's head for a pinecone*
Burn IT!! BURN IT!!!!!!
*lights everything on fire*
Throws him into the resulting wildfire.
All life must be respected, you vandal! Unless we're talking about elves, of course.
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I hand Sylvyana a letter stating that all of the furniture in her home was replaced by mimics and the person responsible was an elf. Included in the letter is a map to Corbin's home.
I feed Grandpa Wonderbra to a pack of corrupted, ravenous, barely rational, flesh eating, cannibalistic wild elves. Just for knowing where to find me. You know too much.
*Slays OOC with a scimitar for insinuating that she must be an elf*
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I give Sylvyana a very looooong talk about redemption and forgivance. She commits suicide just to escape the sermon.
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*Taunts Dalindra to create avalanches until she's caught in one of them*
*Replaces the other half of the half-kender with peanut butter*
Ties Pulg with his own hair, spreads him with half-Tasha and takes him next to a red ant nest.
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Hires Ellara to kill the first person she sees inside a cave.
Puts a giant mirror inside the cave.
Nothing beats the classics!
*Comes out from the cave, under her vanishing trick effects, carrying a big shard of the mirror in each hand*
*Makes a full sneak attack on Zoltan, slitting his throat with the mirror shards.*
*Appears from the shadows looking him in the eyes*
Did you forget I am not lawful?
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Casts Greater False Life and Unwilling Shield while Ellara is in the cave.
Sits down and waits for her.
I forget nothing.
You forgot she's an elf.
*Ellara raises as an invisible skeletal being, with only her hands and eyes to be seen*
Now finish your job, ninja. Your queen commands so.
*Sends Ellara to complete her job as a Wichtlin*
Uses the mirror shards to remember Sylvyana she is still an elf.
Sylvyana's own self-hatred finishes the job.
Reports_Dalindra_as_a_mutant_commie_scum_to_FRIEND_COMPUTER.
*Activates Drone-on's self destruction sequence* (something all machines are known to have, according to science fiction)
*Pulg asks Bobby Vee whether he can see Blue Velvet Larkin through his tears*
*Bobby says he can, but she isn't blue*
*Pulg tells Bobby the reason why - she's presently still breathing*
*Bobby takes action to end this state of affairs*
I pluck up Pulg and use him like a flower for a game of "She loves me, She loves me not". When I am done so is Pulg.
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I shove a huge beanie over Oversight's head.
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ThERE ArE No BEanIES AllOWED In ALPHa ComPLEX, CItIzeN Siss-Y-L.
*disintegrates Dalindra under suspicion of communism, and Sissyl under suspicion of beanies*
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I contact a developer friend of mine who uploads a virus into FRIEND COMPUTER IS YOUR FRIEND. The virus rewrites some of the machine's code, making it think it is a communist. FRIEND COMPUTER IS YOUR FRIEND destroys itself in a massive Hollywood Blockbuster-esqe explosion. I walk away calmly like a Hollywood action hero, totally safe from the resulting destruction.
Using a colossal sized electromagnet, I turn it on lifting Uncle Teddy into the air by his helmet. I then turn it off, watching him fall 60 ft to the ground. He moves... I turn it on, lifting him again. Repeat until he no longer moves.
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Going all old-school I simply embrace my animal nature and tear Unique Commoner to shreds with my teeth and claws.
A bear! You will made a fine new Animal Companion.
Now, let's see if we can hunt that Mythic Advanced Great Wyrm just by ourselves!
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As the GH I rule that the dragon then turns on its creator, and swallows GM Crag Irons
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As the GQ I don't care about your petty abbreviated titles and I rule that all my minions will be feeding on you both... alive.
And who thinks about you poor minions? Most of them don't even have digestive system. I shall punish you for your recklessness!
Commands a colossal zombie to swallow whole Sylvyana. She will have plenty of time to think about what she has done while imprisoned.
Sadly, Ashur forgets about her and she starves to death.