KahnyaGnorc gets out of speeding tickets all the time by speaking like a cricket.
JDTV, because he did something really, really horrible in a previous life, has been reincarnated as the executive producer of the latest smash hit show on the GoatToucher Channel, 'America's Next Top Back Door Burglar - In Space!'
To his credit, JTDV really keeps the production values high on that show.
Much like a housecat, Pulg expresses his displeasure with unwelcome variance from routine by defecating on the floor.
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IHIYC self-identifies as The Hopes and Dreams of a Generation.
GoatToucher holds two Olympic records: "Pole-vaulting" and "Wrestling"
I'm Hiding In Your Closet is actually hiding under the bed...
IHIYC has pulled his knees in tight, to try and disguise his rather fat knees.
True to form, IHIYC likes to hit people with a bladder to punctuate his jokes, but what he forgets is that the bladder needs to be removed from the pig beforehand.
Pulg dyes his hair...he dyes it gray!
KG is a clone of the original GahnyaKnorc created by the diabolical Dr. Twim.
I'm Hiding In Your Closet once touched a goat. Not anything sexual or inappropriate. Just, you know, touched it. He just wanted to feel what wool felt like.
Well...now you know the origin of fainting goats!
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The Invenusable Flytrap is married to a coconut. To be fair, she's a really, really nice coconut.
JDTV was the coconut's first husband, but left her for an especially floury yam.
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Watching the whole sordid afair is what drove Pulg to casting off the shackles of marrying other life, and caused him to marry two bricks.
IHIYC does so for two reasons
The first is: he is actually terrible at hiding and must have a door in between you and him to make it work.
The second is: he tried multiple small spaces, but ultimately decided on closets.
The third is: he is terrified of tiny rodents with cosmic powers who cannot count, and they commonly refuse to use closets.
Katapeshi slaver TGH owns a petshop in that hive of scum and villainy, and its walls are festooned with the corpses of those who have come in and asked 'Excuse me, do you have hamster balls?' in an attempt to be very funny indeed.
IHIYC has the voice of Gilbert Gottfried.
GoatToucher has the voice of a packet of differently coloured non-toxic whiteboard markers.
Pulg on the other hand, (paw perhaps?) has no voice, but is himself the voice of a kid two blocks down named Ted.
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The Game Hamster is the host of a TV show called The Hamster Game where contestants out compete each other for a chance to be involved in a live production of The Hamster Dance.
In 13th April 1988, JTDV won the first prize in the "David Hasselhof" look-alike tournament, in the ankheg subsection. Since then, it insists on being called "Hank" and will frown menacingly at anyone who doesn't comply.
Moreover, it will sue you if you so much as hint at its old "nom de scene" during the parisian Twenties : Ankhy Panky Jenny. You've been warned !
Quiche Lisp has just discovered the Lost City of Tiotecuenhanahananac in the seat of his trousers.
KG is still living his previous life. The fringe benefits were just too good.
Sissyl's hat-spikes grant her about 18 iterative attacks per round
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I'm Hiding In Your Closet raced and won against the Oscar Meyer Weiner Mobile in his Ocular Migratory Kielbasa Machine.
The Oscar Meyer Wiener Mobile is JTDV's "clever" nickname for his favorite organ.
His pancreas.
For my part, I have a Kielbasa Machine in my "workroom." Would any of you like to try it out?
We can't. There's a farm animal stuck on it.
GoatToucher travels around in a mobile Meyer Lansky's weiner.
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KG never ever saw a movie that wasn't a sequel. It has gotten confusing at times.