Any way, sadly Seattle is a little too far for me to get to since still no transportation but I'll keep all of that in mind.
The public transportation in the area is really, really good—get an ORCA card as soon as its feasible, it makes everything awesome. If I could combine Portland's MAX Light Rail and the local coverage, it would be blissful.
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So the Gender Bender Dance was a big success. We had a bunch of people show up and got some new folks for the gender studies club. I looked pretty fabulous if I say so myself, I'm thinking I make a much prettier woman than I do a man. Thanks to all those who voiced their support and such!
My parents weren't too thrilled once the pictures got on Facebook, and I did have a few people say a number of rude things to my parents about it, and I got a concerned call from Grampa, but overall the reaction has been a big net positive and I'm feeling great!
This thread really is filled with the sweetest people. :-)
I sympathize. People who get obsessive about sex with you can get kinda scary. Is it possible to talk to him and just try to get him to see How this is inappropriate?
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I'm fairly use to open minded, friendly people since moving from Portland, but I'm actually kind of surprised how great people here are (both around and in Pathfinder in general). Everyone at the Society game days have been really accepting and great.
Yeah, I came from Oklahoma. I miss home sometimes but when I was there, I was often scared to leave the house. I've had some terrible things happen to some friends of mine. That's not a concern here, I can even hold my wife's hand and not feel the least bit concerned. It's a good place to transition.
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(All this, mind you, while insisting that he's straight. Which I wouldn't CARE about except he feels it needful to make this assertion several times before, during, and after... sigh.)
That sounds like a classic example of Have I Mentioned I Am Heterosexual Today? I didn't realise that non-famous people actually did that.
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Well, if you're 16 years old and discover the girl you have a crush on think you might be gay, I think it's excusable.
*totally-not-something-that-happened-to-me-honest!* ;)
So, I have an unusual problem.
A little background:
I've got a friend of several years who had been staunchly-straight for the entirety of our friendship (which was sad, him being cute in all the right ways for my preferred 'type'). He recently (well, as far as I know this was a recent switch, though I have no idea how long he may have been ruminating over it) decided that he really wanted me to take him to bed.
Aaaaand, well, long story short, I did. (Duh.) Was happy to do it, we had a couple of delightful evenings... and now it's like there was some twisted Djinn granting my wish, because it's become a freaking nightmare. He won't leave me alone. I mean, every night he's not stuck at work, he calls and wheedles and whines about wanting to take me to bed again, and he sulks if I turn him down. (All this, mind you, while insisting that he's straight. Which I wouldn't CARE about except he feels it needful to make this assertion several times before, during, and after... sigh.)
I've been hiding behind "I'm still too fragile to fool around, while my breastbone knits," but that's (at best) a three-month solution...It's getting to the point that I'm regretting ruining a pleasant friendship.
So, has anybody got one of those Men in Black flashy-things, so I can make him forget this ever happened?
Arg. Not really expecting anyone to solve this: distinctly "own damn fault" event, as well as "not fixable" kind of affair; no way to unf*ck things, him, our friendship. Just in case anyone needs it, remember to be careful what you wish for...
Just wanted to complain a little to sympathetic audience; can't really talk to anyone in hometown, since on top of everything else, he's completely closeted. :/
I don't know, cheeseweasel. This sounds like a painful situation. I wonder what I would have done if that happened with my first girlfriend.
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Welcome, Redjack_rose! Glad to hear you like Arshea. :-)
Glad to hear you're all right, cheeseweasel!
Cheeseweasel, watch your heart-rate...
A bit more seriously, though: Could that be the case of person that is only very slightly bi - being aroused only by a very specific individual of the same gender, namely you? Or maybe he is really homosexual who wasn't aware of that and now he discovered the best sex in his life and that's why he's so clingy?
*shrug*
Anyway, wishes are dangerous... Especially when asking for anything beyond the basic effect of duplicating another spell or undoing a condition...
I'm useless in a hospital. I can't stand the sight of blood or needles and I even fainted once when the nurse was cleaning a surgery wound of mine back in March. :(
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As has been mentioned by several wise people, obviously some conversation is in order. I'm trying to determine a good angle of attack -- to avoid tripping the switch on what I suspect to be an extremely-tense bundle of inner conflict. I really don't want to have him melt down or huff up because I'm trying to brush him off a little.
I do not envy you that conversation. I hope it goes well though. Having to be straight with a friend is never easy, even though it's right thing to do most of the time. Good luck!
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I do not envy you that conversation. I hope it goes well though. Having to be straight with a friend is never easy, even though it's right thing to do most of the time. Good luck!
I see what you did there.
Sorry... I failed my Will save. Please don't think trying to make light of your situation, Cheeseweasel. I just can't ever resist a pun.
It's never easy to turn someone down, especially when they're emotionally vulnerable. But ultimately, you need to do what's best for you.
Best of luck! And stay well!
I see what you did there.*facepalm*
you didn't see What you did there?
PS to Jessica:
Thanks for the kind wishes. Aside from healing up from surgery, we (my docs and I) are concentrating our efforts on reigning in my blood sugar levels -- not off the charts, but perniciously-high. Had my first post-op appointment today, and we're raising my insulin dosage (as well as adding several blood-sugar level tests to my daily routine, to track it a little more closely. It's an excellent thing I don't suffer from aichmophobia [fear of sharp things]).
Anyway -- appreciate the support.
Any work on custom-tailored diet? Or is there little chance to adjust diet properly within your budget?
Sorry... I failed my Will save. ... I just can't ever resist a pun.
As Shakespeare might have said, 'get thee to a punnery!'
Sorry... I failed my Will save. ... I just can't ever resist a pun.As Shakespeare might have said, 'get thee to a punnery!'
... Honestly, all my life I've never heard that one! *Adds it happily to list of "pun" puns*
I have been on the other end of a coming out...
I had got back from Uni for my Christmas break, I lived 15 mins walk the beach and Christmas is in summer in Australia.
One of my best ever friends and I were walking back from the beach through the scrub at sunset the sky was orange pink and the smell of barbecues and sea salt was in the air.
My friend look at me and said something like "hey mate I have something important to tell you"
"Yep"
He said "mate I think I am gay"...serious voice not joking.
My brain went oh this is very important don't balls this up for him, say something that will reassure him that this doesn't change our friendship and that peoples sexual orientation is not an issue for me.
My mouth says "mate I am your friend no matter what".... Brain says "Oh s#!# I worded that wrong... did I word that wrong?, oh crap I think I did... because what I said sounds like there is something wrong with him and I am still his friend...
He didn't speak to me for a few days I kept calling him to hang out, still friends 20 years later...
Brains are weird. I'm very glad your friendship is still going strong.
I am forever grateful that when my little brother came out to me the first thing that came to my head was: "Huh. I totally didn't expect that", and the first thing that came to my mouth was: "Okay... Do you still want to get pancakes?"
As a GM, I like to play very realistic worlds, and being essentially the Dark Ages for most societies homophobia is rampant in most of my game worlds. I've had players with LGBT characters and players who are LGBT themselves complain about it. Can I get some opinions on this?
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As a GM, I like to play very realistic worlds, and being essentially the Dark Ages for most societies homophobia is rampant in most of my game worlds. I've had players with LGBT characters and players who are LGBT themselves complain about it. Can I get some opinions on this?
I'm of the opinion that realism is overrated in a world with magic, active gods and dragons. My wife likes to tell a story about how she wanted to play a woman in a wild west game and instead of treating her like Annie Oakley, they put her down and constantly told her that the west was no place for a woman. When you get called terrible things in real life, being told that you're terrible for things you have no control over is dehumanizing. I don't necessarily need that in my fantasy gaming even amongst the bad guys. So if they have a problem with it and they've come to you, I'd say listen. We're all here to have fun.
Cheeseweasel: It is not okay for him to treat you, or anyone that way. Talk is becoming necessary. I would say you are right in assuming that he is gay, but for some reason doesn't want to accept that. Now, sexuality is not something we can control. Not to any large degree. So, in you, a friend, he found the perfect solution. He probably regards himself as a man who has sex with other men - this is a very common situation, common enough that you need to specify this in STD awareness campaigns and such, just to reach people. In essence, he gets the sex, but doesn't need to come out or deal with any of the hassles of being gay socially, where he has a clear identity already.
Perfect, right? Well, to him. I would say the driving force of this is fear. Fear, despite the fact that admitting he's gay probably would solve a lot of the stuff he sees as problems.
Just be aware that he is desperate for a simple reason: You are probably a necessary part of it. Without you, he has no other options. Be prepared, because his reactions could get stronger than you think. Okay?
Of course, this could just be me rambling...
I'm holding out for the vice principal to say that the problem was that his purse didn't match his shoes and it was a poor fashion statement. I think I'm wrong though.
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I'm holding out for the vice principal to say that the problem was that his purse didn't match his shoes and it was a poor fashion statement. I think I'm wrong though.
Really.A handbag? We're really sending kids home from school for carrying a purse? Was it a slow week? Did the principal have a quota to make?
Don't know about your neck of the woods, but around here that vice principal would be either fired, suspended, or at the very least "given other work-duties" faster than you can say Vera Wang.
Something about this story sounds weird. I used to bring shoulderbags and messenger bags that looked a lot like that(twas the 90s) with no issue. Someone's going to be out of a job soon, I think, or this kid had an ongoing feud the wrong teacher/admin. I know there's no sense in bigotry but this seems to be an unusually stupid case.
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Something about this story sounds weird. I used to bring shoulderbags and messenger bags that looked a lot like that(twas the 90s) with no issue. Someone's going to be out of a job soon, I think, or this kid had an ongoing feud the wrong teacher/admin. I know there's no sense in bigotry but this seems to be an unusually stupid case.
Probably because the culture was less polarized about it then -- LGBTQ people were more closeted. So your carrying something that might read as feminine was a personal quirk. Now, if you're an anti-gay administrator, a kid carrying it is making a political statement, and you have to shut it down to show you're not okay with it. Or, put another way: back when most people could be assumed to be at least mildly disapproving of homosexuality, you didn't need to prove you were.
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As a GM, I like to play very realistic worlds, and being essentially the Dark Ages for most societies homophobia is rampant in most of my game worlds. I've had players with LGBT characters and players who are LGBT themselves complain about it. Can I get some opinions on this?I'm of the opinion that realism is overrated in a world with magic, active gods and dragons. My wife likes to tell a story about how she wanted to play a woman in a wild west game and instead of treating her like Annie Oakley, they put her down and constantly told her that the west was no place for a woman. When you get called terrible things in real life, being told that you're terrible for things you have no control over is dehumanizing. I don't necessarily need that in my fantasy gaming even amongst the bad guys. So if they have a problem with it and they've come to you, I'd say listen. We're all here to have fun.
SIDE NOTE: This is a big part of why I generally dislike playing Call of Cthulhu. Maybe it's just the groups I've played it with, but every CoC gamer I've ever known, men and women alike, gets so caught up in the era-appropriate gender and racial roles of the game's post-Victorian setting that male PCs are expected to be racist, misogynist asshats and female PCs are expected to take every sexist throw-off with a smile. And the Elder Gods help you if you play a black PC, as I did once. (That's why I say bring on the Delta Green, baby!)
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Maybe principal was suspecting that the teenager in question would use the bag to carry weapons or smuggle drugs? It's America after all...
And the Elder Gods help you if you play a black PC, as I did once.
Cultist! Cultist!
I'd want to know the rest of the story, if any. Like, was the kid filling the bag with rocks and using it as an improvised (and very expensive) flail? Selling drugs out of it or carrying weapons in it (as someone else alluded)? Using it as a "prop" to mock GLBTwhatever students? Any of these I could make a case for suspending him. But simply using it as a purse? Then no way, I can't find any grounds on which to condone the suspension.
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Maybe principal was suspecting that the teenager in question would use the bag to carry weapons or smuggle drugs? It's America after all...
I fully expect that the principle would be duty-bound to uphold the student's second amendment rights and remove the gun from the bag and return it to the student before confiscating the subversive bag.
It is the first duty of the principle to protect his students from harm, and that bag (even without a gun in it) was a clear and present danger to the student body and had to be dealt with swiftly.
Thank goodness the student still had the gun to protect him on his way home.
I see where you are coming from, Dame Price, but there's just...I don't know, SOMETHING up here, that makes my Freehold Sense tingle/activates my newtype-telepathy. It could be stupid bigotry, but bigotry is rarely THIS stupid. I want to know more.
