Deep 6 FaWtL

[Nekkid Vidmaster7]

gran rey de los mono wrote:

I used to write horoscopes for a living. I got fired because every day for Cancer I would write "Keep fighting."

wow that joke is a emotional roller coaster ride as your brain processes its implications.

Edit: I had to strip down at some point apparently.

[gran rey de los mono]

Why do the French eat snails? Because they don't like fast food.

[gran rey de los mono]

Why is South Korea more fun than North Korea? North Korea has no Seoul.

[gran rey de los mono]

Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

[Vidmaster7]

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Why is South Korea more fun than North Korea? North Korea has no Seoul.

That and the whole dictatorship thing.

[gran rey de los mono]

What do Elves learn in kindergarten? The Elfabet.

[Vidmaster7]

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Me and him are beard bros.

[gran rey de los mono]

What do you do if your house is surrounded by 50 zombies? Pray that it's Halloween.

[Punniculus]

Vidmaster7 wrote:

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Me and him are beard bros.

So, if you were to join my following, you would wear this?

[gran rey de los mono]

Why does the Easter Bunny hide eggs? So his wife doesn't find out he's been screwing the chickens.

[Vidmaster7]

Punniculus wrote:

Vidmaster7 wrote:

gran rey de los mono wrote:

Why is Santa Claus so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live.

Me and him are beard bros.

So, if you were to join my following, you would wear this?

hypothetically speaking yes.

[gran rey de los mono]

When I broke up with her, my ex said "You'll never find anyone like me!" I said "That's kind of the point."

[gran rey de los mono]

The other day my wife asked me "What do you like best about me, my pretty face, or my sexy body?" I looked her up and down, and said "Your sense of humor."

[gran rey de los mono]

I saw a teenager the other day with a Mohawk dyed yellow, red, and green. He caught me staring and snarled "What the f$*+ are you looking at?" I said "I'm sorry. It's just that when I was about your age I had sex with a parrot, and I was wondering if you were my son."

[Vidmaster7]

gran rey de los mono wrote:

The other day my wife asked me "What do you like best about me, my pretty face, or my sexy body?" I looked her up and down, and said "Your sense of humor."

Id get a taste tester for the food she prepares for you.

If it were me anyways.

[gran rey de los mono]

"At that point I think you're giving the game too much credit. When you're like 'I think it might have been better, but I forgot.'"

[gran rey de los mono]

"Okay, but if you hear a loud explosion anytime soon, the trip's off."

[Vidmaster7]

Is he talking to someone here? Do I have someone ignored and don't know it?

[gran rey de los mono]

"It's not gelling."
"It can't gel now. It got all nice and warm in my belly."

[gran rey de los mono]

"I've been fighting with my mom lately. I just don't know how to communicate with her."
"Well, have you tried giving a lizard to your landlord?"

[gran rey de los mono]

"I just can't do it without an audience."

[State of confusion]

...

[gran rey de los mono]

"What kind of pansy fridge do you have? All my cooling devices are liquid nitrogen fueled, so that way I both get it at low temperatures AND can stop a T-1000."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Purify100 says 'This is the least viscous gelatin ever.'"

[gran rey de los mono]

"Generator? I hardly knew her."
"You punched the speech right out of my mouth, Bill."

[gran rey de los mono]

"If the clue is in there, we're not going to solve the puzzle because I'm not going back in there. That's how I play Morrowind."
"This isn't Morrowind, it's El Marrowind."

[gran rey de los mono]

*squish squish squish squish*
"Oh Jesus, Sean, what are you doing? Uhh."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Meanwhile, on the boring screen."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Okay, here's the plan. I need a disguise so i can get close to Hector, and a gun so we have something to talk about when I get there."

[gran rey de los mono]

"It's the part of the soldier the DIDN'T get up and hop out of here on one hand."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Yeah skeletons wear lingerie and I look at it. It's just a bra over a rib cage. That's hot."
"You sound like an ad exec from like 1995."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Okay, I don't know what's down there, but I have issues with it."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Why did that bring us to the sewer?"
"Because we used Glottis with rocket, and we're here. Well, we were, but then we had to use vomit with liquid nitrogen on dominoes to unlock car. And once we unlocked car, we came here, and now we need to impersonate."
"I see."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Yeah if this was King's Quest 7, we would kill them without even knowing that's what we were trying to do. And afterward we wouldn't feel a thing. Maybe that's what it's like to be a serial killer? You just play the Princess is King's Quest 7 all day."

[gran rey de los mono]

*pours coffee*
"Hey kid, keep it black and keep it coming."
"That's what she said."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Just reach in and find any old gland."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Hector, I almost have that new bouquet of tulips ready for you."
"Listen to me once and for all, Bowlsley! YOU ARE NOT A FLORIST! YOU ARE A MANUFACTURER OF WEAPONS!!!"

[gran rey de los mono]

after a discussion about a flower shop called Sherwood Florist, the conversation moves on to be about a strip club
"Hey Sean, was the strip club called Throbbin' Goods and the Married Men?"

[gran rey de los mono]

I like this song.

[gran rey de los mono]

And now is the time on FaWtL where I go to work. See ya.

[Rysky]

Pathfinder Kingmaker Kickstarter, 18 hours left and at $800,000 USD

The Core game is almost done, the Kickstarter was just for extras ($700K got us Mac AND Linux support and $800K got us Archetypes for all the classes).

$900K gets us the Gobbo companion, Nok-Nok and $1M gets us a new player race, backers will vote for 1 of 3 from a poll, from the silhouettes I'm thinking Dhampir, Tiefling, and one other, possibly Skinwalker.

[Freehold DM]

Rysky wrote:

Pathfinder Kingmaker Kickstarter, 18 hours left and at $800,000 USD

The Core game is almost done, the Kickstarter was just for extras ($700K got us Mac AND Linux support and $800K got us Archetypes for all the classes).

$900K gets us the Gobbo companion, Nok-Nok and $1M gets us a new player race, backers will vote for 1 of 3 from a poll, from the silhouettes I'm thinking Dhampir, Tiefling, and one other, possibly Skinwalker.

just pledged my 5 bucks.

As kingmaker is about to end for us soon, it would be wrong not to.

FOR VERLANDIA

[captain yesterday]

Didn't they already try to make a video game.

No thanks, I'll pass. :-)

[gran rey de los mono]

This sounds like a pretty s@@#ty bar.

[Freehold DM]

Vidmaster7 wrote:

I don't like hard-boiled eggs.

why do you hate America?

[Freehold DM]

Vidmaster7 wrote:

gran rey de los mono wrote:

A man went to the psychiatrist and said "My wife made me come here because I like pancakes." The psychiatrist said "That doesn't make you crazy. In fact, I like pancakes too." The man said "Great! Why don't you come over and tell my wife that. Then we can have pancakes together. I've got a whole basement full of them!"

Ugh all those carbs...

why do you hate sentient carbon based life?

[gran rey de los mono]

"And that's how the wall got pregnant."

[gran rey de los mono]

"Sheriff has never been able to get on the chair, because Sheriff is overweight."

[gran rey de los mono]

"It seems like it's important that it's huge, and I don't know why."
"That's what she said."

[gran rey de los mono]

"People are wondering why I still have Christmas lights up. THESE ARE NOT CHRISTMAS LIGHTS! These are just lights."