I can be whatever I want. The Elder Gods said so. So neener neener.
Sure, as long as what you want to be is a sanity-shredding abomination from Beyond The Stars. There are no accountants in the Far Realm - no qualified accountants, at any rate.
At the end of the Elder God's three day accounting seminar, I had forgotten what numbers are.
Numbers are what you do to others.
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Molten Dragon: Accountant to the Elder Gods.
As sang by Bon Jovi.
On Pay Per View.
Born to walk in fields of daisies.
All my friends, they call me crazy.
I........ I wanna tell yooooooo!
Someday you'll be so bloooooooo!
Wif my guitar on my back, in the yard, I feel so lazy.
Ain't never comin back, cause I met a girl called Maisey.
I used to write for Ron Juan Dovi. As you can see, I still got it.
>8vB
Angry person who needs braces.
Forest Gump, or facial?
Yes.
I thought you lot called braces 'suspenders'. What about facial suspenders? What about suspending Forrest Gump? If so, what from?
Good with fingerling potatoes and a tangerine sauce.
And diced Red Cap toe nails.
A happy reed warbler from the United Arab Emirates.
On the side, a Murphey's beer.
"Whatever happens in the closet, stays in the closet....."
Unless you're with GoatToucher, then it spills out into the bedroom, hallway, bathroom, living room etc.
Trust that I know exactly what I am doing and where I am doing it.
AAIIIEEEE!!
*Runs away before seeing anything.*
Trust that I know exactly what I am doing and where I am doing it.
But do you ever stop and think 'Why?'
I'll just leave this vat of molten butter in the hallway and slowly back away.
Into another vat full of molten butter.
I wondered where I'd left that!
Can't I have my bath in a molten butter tub in peace??
* hands IHIYC an adamantium earthbreather *
Try this.
*Hands IHIYC a large adamantium grasping device consisting of two pieces joined at one end by a pivot.*
Use these: Tongs of Ice and Fire.
Then you just need this.
*hands a green citrus slice several feet across*
Yes. The Wheel of Lime.
Ooh look, the annotated 'Dragonlunch Saga'
With a recipe for crunchy Kender bits. Irresistible!
Baste them with some of this.
*hands over some Lard of the Rings*
How marvelous.
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*looks at assembled panoply, rubs hands* Well!
Molten Dragon, when you're done with your molten butter bath, come In here with me for a minute. You, uh...need to do your laundry again...!
*readies Tongs, puts Lard in deep-fryer, puts Saga on bookstand, picks up Wheel of Lime and rotates it in 30-degree jerks while making race-car driver noises*
I'm a 33rd Degree Jerk.
Wait! You forgot the Soiled Cheese!
*looks at assembled panoply, rubs hands* Well!
Molten Dragon, when you're done with your molten butter bath, come In here with me for a minute. You, uh...need to do your laundry again...!
*readies Tongs, puts Lard in deep-fryer, puts Saga on bookstand, picks up Wheel of Lime and rotates it in 30-degree jerks while making race-car driver noises*
I even wore a belt of garlic bulbs while in the tub. I'm famished what's on the menu??