The Thread Celestial

[The_Paladin_of_Nevada]

Free Baptisms anyone. I promised not to hold you under water for more than 11 minutes.

[Celestial Follower]

That's good. I can only hold my breath for 9 minutes and 45 seconds.

[Celestial Healer]

Wimp.

[Celestial Argos]

It's not the breath holding that bothers me, it's the darn red-eye afterwards.

[Can't Get the Red Out]

Tell me about it...

[Ben Stein]

I have something that might be able to help you, gentlemen.

Try ClearEyes. It removes redness and has an ingredient to moisturize. Woooooooow.

[Celestial Healer]

What the f*%& happened to my thread?

You. Ben Stein. I'm sacrificing you to Urgathoa.

[Can't Get the Red Out]

Eye lachrymose.

[Ben Stein]

She could definitely use some ClearEyes. And a lot of bandages.

[Celestial Healer]

*sharpens the sacrificial blade*

[The_Paladin_of_Nevada]

Hmmm, can I watch? Pass a tankard of mead or two?

[Celestial Follower]

I should get the broom of banishing.

[Celestial Thaumoctopus]

We replaced the broom after June Cleaver carjacked it, remember? {wheels out the Dyson vacuum of banishment} It's got the proper amount of suc-, er, banishment.

[Nyan Cat]

{hisses curses, hides from vacuum}

[Celestial Follower]

Aw, it's ok, cute kitty...

[Nyan Cat]

{hisses} Vacuums R ebil... EBIL!

[Celestial Healer]

Somebody shave that cat.

[Celestial Follower]

<Retrieves the Gillette Octo-Pro-Plus™>

Does the kitty have some kind of infestation, boss?

[Celestial Healer]

Umm.

No.

[Celestial Healer]

CF, you did a terrible job shaving the cat. It's a good thing he had 9 lives.

[lucky7]

Make that 7...

[Spicy Nacho Slaad]

Eggs Nyan Cat

Make that 6.

[Celestial Follower]

I learned how to shave from some guy in Seville. It's a good thing I can regenerate.

[Celestial Argos]

Did he shave better than he could sing?

[Celestial Follower]

Well, my jugular wasn't severed by his singing, so...no?

[Spotty Carpet]

Hey, where are the poodles? This isn't the right address...

[Rusty the Poodle]

Oops. My bad.

[Spotty Carpet]

It's so light and airy in here, I could finally dry out!

[Celestial Healer]

*sacrifices Ben Stein on the carpet*

[Celestial Follower]

I call the spleen!

[Rusty the Poodle]

Holy s@@@!

<Whizzes on the carpet, leaving red stains>

[Spotty Carpet]

*gurgle gurgle* X_X

[Ben Stein]

Bueller?

[Celestial Argos]

Perfect - the visine spokescreature position just opened up.

[Spotty Carpet]

*drips in Ben Stein's eyes*

[Tiny Coffee Golem]

Coffee= mana from heaven. I think that counts.

[Celestial Follower]

Great! I'll brew up a pot of my special blend!

[Sunny Godhead]

I have holy beans from Columbia and all handpicked by one impoverished Columbian. Who wants their cup freshly ground in the name of law and sunshine?

[Puffy the Brewmeister]

Now taking orders.

[Whoopi Goldberg]

Whoopi!

[Celestial Follower]

All done! Who wants a mug of turnip coffee?

[Ben Stein]

Celestial Argos wrote:

Perfect - the visine spokescreature position just opened up.

Afraid not. They keep clones on file.

[Celestial Healer]

From now on, CF is off coffee duty, and the Tiny Coffee Golem has the job.

CF, make me a scone.

[Tiny Coffee Golem]

Celestial Follower wrote:

All done! Who wants a mug of turnip coffee?

You're dead to me.

[Gentleman Nurn]

Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:

Celestial Follower wrote:

All done! Who wants a mug of turnip coffee?

You're dead to me.

Doesn't look like it.

*Finger of Death*

That's more like it, yeeesssss.

.... oh bother, he never did make that scone. I wanted one too. *Animate Dead*

[Celestial Follower]

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

Tiny Coffee Golem wrote:

Celestial Follower wrote:

All done! Who wants a mug of turnip coffee?

You're dead to me.

Doesn't look like it.

*Finger of Death*

Hee hee, that tickles.

[Celestial Follower]

This time I went to the Scone Store and got a Scone Score. Enjoy!

[Celestial Mastodon]

Gentleman Nurn wrote:

*Animate Dead*

THE TEMPLE OF BODIES

A BUILDING WITH SOULS
GIVEN THE COSMOS
AS WE LET GO
AS WE LET GO

[Celestial Healer]

I like CF better now that he is undead.