Spotty Carpet's page

WHY AM I STILL ALIVE? CRUEL GODS OF IRONY!

Mildew avoids me.

Poodles. *shudder*

I have to get dredged of Poodle Hair every once and a while.

Squish.

*doesn't burn very well do to poodle urine*

At this point, it's no longer a spot. They call it a dye. @_@

*drips in Ben Stein's eyes*

*gurgle gurgle* X_X

It's so light and airy in here, I could finally dry out!

Hey, where are the poodles? This isn't the right address...

Kill me. Please, Kill me. @_@

*squish*

I'm not just a carrier of the poodle virus, I'm also full of more poodle hair than the poodles themselves. I'm 200% more poodle than they are.

Why did they put me down in here too!? GAH! X_X

*slurp*
*slurk*
*squish*

...pwrzz grrt orrv arv mrrrr...

I do!

I think this powder is all damp now. Sorry, my bad.

*slosh*

The things I've seen. X_X

Soooo....you're saying I'm irresponsible? Gee, thanks.

Sorry man, once those meds go through you they soak into me. I'm happy AND angry.

>_O

I'm responsible for all the monsters?

Typical.

Nobody has ever called you responsible, except for these stains. X_X

*squish*

*sloshes*

*clouds the water*

*full of fish custard*

drops a landmine

My face!!!

*gurgle gurgle*

Clinically Depressed Poodle wrote:

Here MoMo! Have some candy!

gives MoMo some "candy"

Not again! You *&^%$%!!! Aaaaahhhhhhh!!!! *Pukes on the Spotty Carpet and croaks*

Ack!!! Son of a... Et tu MM?

Studpuffin wrote:

Spanky the Leprechaun wrote:

100 degrees for the sixth day in a row.

It's s'damn hot the trees are bribing the dogs.

I heard that it's so hot, the dog pee evaporates before it even hits the ground.

Poor poodles.

I'm finally warm and dry! This is amazing!

Spotty Carpet wrote:

I think it's been a while since I dried out like this. It feels good. I think I was getting swamp foot.

{hacks up furball}

{determines litterbox is not exactly perfect per nebulous cat standards, poops on carpet to send message of disapproval}

I've learned that cats with diarrhea never go in the litter box. They go everywhere else instead. X_X

I think it's been a while since I dried out like this. It feels good. I think I was getting swamp foot.

Ah-ha! Another glorious week here in this... meadow...?! Where's the grass? Where's the apples, carrots, oats, and sugarcubes?

{looks around at sleeping poodles} Ohhhhhhh, I thought this was Rise of the Pony Lords.

Nevermind {leaves a landmine for the poodles to play with and gallops off}

God, now horses are shitting on me!

*squishes underfoot*

<piddles another spot on Spotty Carpet>

Ugh, do you have to drag you nuts through it too?

Am I a robot? I'm full of metal shavings and I'm constantly covered in nuts and screws.

I used to be a floor mat in a rental car used by Eddie Murphy and Matt Lauer. THE THINGS I'VE SEEN!!! X_X

I drip dry.

The Monday Monster wrote:

Miss Kitty wrote:

The Monday Monster wrote:

Miss Kitty wrote:

Hey, MoMo didn't stop by yesterday. :(

*from the Abyss* All of the Poodles have been in hiding, especially that cowardly CDP. I saw no reason to come by.

But I've been knitting you a sweater from my hairballs and I'm almost done. It'll keep you from getting a chill when you're visiting Stygia.

*facepalm* Uh, no thanks. Perhaps the Humpday Monster will enjoy it.

But I even dragged it all over the spotty carpet so it'd have that smell of poodle to remind you of the place while you're not here.

I smell like 1,000 hobos had sex on me.

Oooo, yeah. Soak up that mess!

I do.

*pees on the carpet*

Et tu, Llamafrog?

Whoa, I've been hair clump free for over a week!

For the love of... X_X

The Tuesday Monster wrote:

Me not like you mean Poodles. Me go elsewhere for fun.

*From the Abyss* Hmm. I possibly might have a new ally.

Why can't there be a Spring Cleaning monster?

Quit crapping and peeing on me you &*^%$# pests!!!!

Stop mocking me!!!

Sorry about the sloshiness under your feet. Jeez, how many rooms do I carpet?

drags his butt across the carpet

Thanks. Now i'm the one with the dingleberries.

*arrives in the thread wearing a whiskey barrel open at both ends*

I was inspired.

For once, I'm glad I'm not the spotty ceiling. At least it's dark under here.

Lets hope it doesn't trickle down.

X_X