Raise of the Poodle Lords


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Frowns at the still-standing Primary Adjunct.

"Guess I better upgrade to C4 next time."

Runs back to Acme Depot.


Any thing less then nuclear armament is Irrelevant


Stops at the door

"You mean I have to shell out for the Acme Fun-time Fat Man Bomb Kit? Man, I don't know if I have enough cash for that kind of outlay. Them Russkis aint selling their Plutonium cheap these days."

Resumes trip to Acme Depot, grumbling.

"Just payed down my Acme Depot credit card, razzfrazzin' ..."


There is a 3.24973% chance a Nuclear payload could slow the collective
However drone deactivation is Irrelevant to long term success
Resistance Is Futile


Malice Jack returns from the Acme Depot with a large crate stamped 'Acme'. He pushes it in to poodle's clubhouse then levels the box apart and unwraps a long winding spool of bubbletape that shrouds a large item inside.

A large machine with banks of vacuum tubes and spark wire antennae is revealed, with a large horseshoe magnet attached to one side. The words Acme Super-Magnetron 2000 are stenciled on its side.

"Nukes just didn't fit the budget so I had to think outside the box."

Flips a switch and a loud humming commences. The borg slides backwards, hitting the magnet and sticking fast.

"Excellent."


Adapts magnetizing shielding
Your money was ill spent
Your attack was Irrelevant
Scans show you have a higher metal content
You will adapt to serve us
Resistance is futile


It should be noted after the assimilation of species 327 your technology base is now part of the collective
We have adapted your technology to serve us
All attacks from species 327 are now Irrelevant
Resistance is futile


Malice Jack looks at the borg

"You didn't assimilate Acme Depot yet you half-meatwad."


As part of the technology database of species 327
Yes we have


You'll never get the Matixbot to cooperate. Maybe thats sort of it charm.

*Picks up the Matixbot, wipes of the soot from the explosion and brings it back to the conga line*

ChachaCHA!

Sovereign Court

Hey, maybe he's like Bender and needs beer to operate properly!

*Starts pouring alcohol into Paizomatix's casing*


Your conga line is Irrelevant and flawed
Reorders the Congo like into a more organized patten
This conga line has been assimilated
Resistance was Futile


Callous Jack wrote:

Hey, maybe he's like Bender and needs beer to operate properly!

*Starts pouring alcohol into Paizomatix's casing*

I tried that already boss, but not even a Cigar would lighten the Matix-bot up.


Your cigars much like your rum are flawed and Irrelevant


Hey, quit trying to socialize with the vending machine and get back to the Conga line! When we finish it'll be LIMBO time!

Cha cha CHA!

Sovereign Court

Frat Jack wrote:
Callous Jack wrote:

Hey, maybe he's like Bender and needs beer to operate properly!

*Starts pouring alcohol into Paizomatix's casing*

I tried that already boss, but not even a Cigar would lighten the Matix-bot up.

I do not want to know where you tried to put that cigar.


It was a Bill Clinton Portafina!

looks at the conga line

Oh well, if you can't blow them up, join them!

CHA CHA CHA CHA CHA CHA!!


Callous Jack wrote:
I do not want to know where you tried to put that cigar.

He only has one... I learned that the hard-smelly way... But we are robots, so what the heck!

Cha cha cha cha cha LIMBO!


*Sets up the limpo posts and changes the music*


Hey puffy fellows! check out the master with the two sexy doggies on his side!here....I wondered why we werent invited...?


He didn't invite you because you pee everywhere


Dread Lord Poodle wrote:
He didn't invite you because you pee everywhere

He does too!!! Well... I guess he has his privileges... :(


Has anyone seen the Poodlemaster...? He's been gone for a while... I hope he comes back soon


The collective may have over hunted species 715.
Fear not for your weak displaces kind
We have a place for you
Resistance Is Futile


ARF ARF!

licks himself in rather hard to reach place


I come bearing gifts
Leaves baskets of tribbles for everyone

The Exchange RPG Superstar 2009 Top 8

Find the master.


I ask for volunteer to look on other message boards! I heard the poodle lord used to dwell on other dark places under the same title -CourtFool- but me beign a sourthern (very!) poodle, I'm not familiar with other message boards... If someone knows of them please lemme know and I'll plundge deep into those pits of despair and try to bring the master back!


What do we do once we have found him?


Hangin's to good for him!

Burnin's to good for him!

He should be chopped up into little bitty pieces, and BURIED ALIVE!!!

cue Cheap Trick


You know it's true what they say about 'you can run, but you can't hide'. There was this one time, when Captain Kid Rime had a Woozle and a Heffalump cornered up by...
Uh. You don't want to hear about that?
Well it's not *that* sort of story, but perhaps you're right and it's better off not told.
<scuttles off to look for another thread>


Lawyer: "Not Guilty! Are you nuts??!!??"
Court Fool: "It's OK Charlie, I gotta angle."
Lawyer: "But the prosecutor's got you cold! You're as guilty as a poodle in a milkbone box."

Calling Hannover Fiste!


Man I'm bored. Time for a trip to the Acme Depot!

Runs off, credit card in hand.


Returns from Acme Depot trailing a handcart stacked with several large boxes. Begins unpacking a small dogbed, a box of milkbones, a large anvil, a coil of rope, and a pressure plate.

Malice sets up a cosy looking bed on top of the pressure plate and sprinkles the milkbones all around it. He winches the anvil over the dogbed via the rope and attaches the end of the rope to the pressure plate. He then steps back and whistles nonchalantly.


Drones arrive and start construction of a new facility . A sign hangs out front reads "Future home of Reactor construction facility 864". A second building labeled Native outreach Facility apply within lays not to far away.


Looks around at the deserted poodle lair, empty but for a few borg busy deconstructing the place.

Well crap. Guess the borg finally assimilated all the poodles. Ah well, nothing more boring than a bunch of mindless robot drones. Guess it's time to go fishing.

Grabs reel, rod and tackle. Walks out of poodle lair and down road into the sunset.


New ships arrive in orbit to begin strip mining and deconstruction the the planets moon


Hey Malice! Wait for me!

Runs after the bronze-colored robot


Yeh, a fresh start may be nice... Now the bucket-of-rust-matiz-bot its trashing the place I don't feel like redecorating anymore, not without the Master around anyway...

Hey Malice and DLP! wait up!

*leaves a sign "gone on vacations"*


Just poop on them and they go away.

*poop*


Jeez... we need to get a cat or something to keep away the dirty bird

*cleans the poop*

Wiat...did I said cat?!?!

*starts barking like crazy and running in circles*

Yipyipyipyapyipyipyapyupa!!!!...


Hahahahahahaha...poop...oops.


The drones install a excrement shielding with arching discharges set at maximum power . Soon after the collective starts exporting fried seagulls,extra crispy.


Go away you dirty bird!

*chases the seagull with a broomstick*


Llamafrog wrote:

Go away you dirty bird!

*chases the seagull with a broomstick*

If you were a part of the collective we could arm you better


Llamafrog wrote:

Go away you dirty bird!

*chases the seagull with a broomstick*

*flies just out of reach just to tantilize the dog*

How do you hold a broomstick with out opposible thumbs?


*Leaves a sign at the door: Party at the Jack's House on Dec 31th. All poodles invited*


Llamafrog wrote:
*Leaves a sign at the door: Party at the Jack's House on Dec 31th. All poodles invited*

Great, that's all we need. More poodle peeing machines.


Woofwoofwoofwoof
YAPYAPYAPYAPYAP
Woofwoofwoofwoof
YAPYAPYAPYAPYAP
Woofwoofwoofwoof
YAPYAPYAPYAPYAP
Woofwoofwoofwoof
YAPYAPYAPYAPYAP
Woofwoofwoofwoof
YAPYAPYAPYAPYAP


Fellow Poodles! aparently the maste IS back!!!! Lets hope he dons the poodle mantle again and inspire us poodles into a sarcastic frenzy and licking madnes!!!!

Yipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyipyip!

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