Stan...the fighter, the wizard, the thief, the warmage, the rogue, the everything.
I've gamed with a guy since 6th grade and every character he has ever had has been named Stan. We are in our 20's now...It's his "thing".
Another guy that's gamed with me for a long time had a ranger named Armolas get it Leg Arm...yeah i didn't either.
Fizz
ITellHim.
The player hadn't picked a name for his PC, but everyone wanted to start. So when an NPC wanted to know his name, the player just said "I Tell Him". The name stuck.
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I once knew a guy who would name all of his characters, in every game he played, after himself. This led to some confusion when he would tell stories about his characters:
Neil: "Remember that time Neil broke into that fortress by himself?"
Other Guy: "Neil the paladin?"
Neil: "No, Neil the Jedi."
Two of the funnier ones we got by spelling things backward were Marb Rekots and Amak Artus.
But the all-time worst character name I've ever seen in play would have to be Macarena. She didn't last long.
The greatest worst name in my group was from back in 2e, we'd just rolled up characters and my buddy sits there for a while trying to come up with a name... and out pops "Killer Giant".
I think he was trying to play as a Ranger (Giantkiller kit), but to this day we laugh at poor, pitiful Killer Giant, with his poor stats and the laughing stock of all NPCs. I think he died within a session.
Honorable Mentions:
Ventura - My character needed an alias so I came up with this one on the spur of the moment by rearange letters in 'Adventure' - 'Ed Ventura' was the full name. I loved the name and used it as an alias over and over again, until six months later the movie _Ace Ventura_ came out, kinda ruined the name for me.
Nalliam Vore - (Human Druid, anagram of 'Animal Lover')
Runners up:
Daboh (pronounced Day-Bow) an archer was my first character, not the worst name, but not great.
Latnem Retsim (Psionic character - read it backwards. Same player as Nailliam above)
Ahoonda Hinda (Spellcaster from an arctic barbarian tribe)
Simian (this wasn't too bad until the party started calling him Simian, the monkey boy)
Winners:
Kneebasher Thunderguts - (Dwarven Fighter)
Marvin the Mad - (Earth Genasi Barbarian)
and our favorite
Ralph
The player who made Ralph was Ralph in every campaign...
Star Wars - a wookie named Ralph
D&D - a barabrian named Ralph
Traveler - a gunner named Ralph
etc...
*sigh*
He did compromise once and make a character named Phlar
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In one of the playtester reports for Wolfgang Baur's Open Design "Empire of the Ghouls", there was a paladin whose name was pronounced "Tee-AT-eh-mee." Spelled just like it sounds, Teatime.
Probably stolen from Terry Pratchett's book _Hogfather_
= Thats where I took it from for my Warforged Artificer, Mr. Teatime| 1 person marked this as a favorite. |
In one of the playtester reports for Wolfgang Baur's Open Design "Empire of the Ghouls", there was a paladin whose name was pronounced "Tee-AT-eh-mee." Spelled just like it sounds, Teatime.
That is the name of the assasin in the book Hogfather, very funny character.
Looks like someone beat me too it, and guessing by the person above they know where my name came from too.
Names
Scro Dirte-->Human rogue, his full given name was Scrotum Dirt, but he made peole call him Scro Dirte (like in Joe Dirt) this was because the DM made me play the rogue when I was wanting to be something else
My wife had a halfling ranger named Dirt DontHurt, and she played as a dirty halfling that never took a bath
Rolemaster campaign:
DeeDee - Female half elf bard. In every sense of the word if you ever seen Dextor's Labratory. Another player who opted out of this campaign joined us one night & we thought to bring in a brother for her "Dex Tor!" lol The whole "DeeDee NOOOOO" jokes ensued.
Good for a laugh at first but I find it hard to pay attention in this campaign. Not to put it down totally, but damn its painful to go through all the "rounds" with "sub-rounds" with about 10 players. I know I have ADD at times but this gets ridiculous after awhile. Especially for spell casters. Going from regular AD&D to this hurts. Especially when you are used to dramatic spells.
I learned out resident "magic user" first spell was "melt ice". Oh god! everyone watch your ice tea! He's got Melt Ice spell! No no, wait. I got 2 shots at him before he can cast it....pfft....
My personal favorites were Brawny Headsplitter, a halfling barbarian who sole tactic was to charge into every battle, even if it wasn't yet a batttle. It worked surprisingly well.
In a Dark Sun campaign, I had a mul gladiator named Basil Thews.
My first 3rd ed character was a half-dragon named Cadherin, which turned out to be a pretty good name after randomly opening my biochemistry book to a page of proteins.
By far, though, my favorite character name was in the old WEG Star Wars. I played a failed Jedi named Neb Benoki. It was made all the more sweet when my sister joined the game, with her bounty hunter, Foba Bett.
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I once DMed a group of players, comprising three newbies and three weirdos:
N00bs:
- Chris, AKA Stiz Zinchen, dwarf druid
- Rob, AKA Morpheus, elven rogue
- Will, AKA Chris, elven ranger
Weirdos:
- Pat, AKA Milo Underhill, halfling cleric of Kord
- Tim, AKA Jesus (hay-SOOS), half-dragon sorcerer
- Christian, AKA Skezz the blind elven barbarian
What the F~%$?
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ITellHim.
The player hadn't picked a name for his PC, but everyone wanted to start. So when an NPC wanted to know his name, the player just said "I Tell Him". The name stuck.
Oh, god. Jarrod, a guy I used to game with was HORRIBLE with naming characters. Some of his include:
- Necesito un Chair
- Salmon Trout
- Radiator
- Erwin Rommel
- Napoleon
- Root Beer
- Bob
The list goes on and on...
I knew a guy who was absolutely terrible with character names.
Like in the original post, this guy once named a character after the soda bottle he was staring at -- Dewtain Mou.
Another time, he named a character after the magazine that was sitting on the table -- Cyan Amer (there was an issue of Scientific American on the table).
He had worse, too, but those are all I can remember.
Shiny, I can't see your post.
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We have had a few in our game and before the rest om my players chime in most of them were my idea.
Mortis Posthaste a Human wizard
Crash 1.1 the warforged fighter
FeMike the half orc barbarian
Grazer the Centaur ranger
Mook Twowep the named bad guy pulled out of the bag
And these are just the ones that I will own in public
From me: Biff Bifftoferson (fighter), Powell MacArtney (bard)
From my players: John Gawain, Argent V. Smithrond (Hugo Weaving fan)
(oops, RS beat me to it)
From TSR: Kracky the Hooded One
Kracky was a pre-gen cleric included in B1:In search of the unknown. I resurrected him and updated him to a 3.5 Druid a few years ago for my 25th anniversary game with my brothers (including Rambling Scribe). The Druid was in charge of looking after the mule, and got tagged as Kracky, the Ass-Whisperer.
Oh heck, the WORST names ever were the pregens in the original release of S4: Lost Caverns of Tsojcanth...
I only remember one offhand (Cathartic the Cleric) but three of them were just plain AWFUL...
S4 pre-gens Dunil, Flemin & Hockerbrecht sound like a brand of cigarettes and a pair of associated respiratory diseases.
Bladder.
I can't remember his title, something like "Keeper of the Holy Water".
I was never asked to play a cleric again.
I had a DM once use dumb puns for the names of the NPC's. We were sent on a quest by a bard called Joel Villiam. The hirelings we aquired we're dubed Bill and Ted the towns most excellent archers. The horse I bought turned out to be a great river swimmer and was soon being called aqualung. The villian of the adventure was an evil Minotaur known as Pat, and she sang to the PC's---badly.
Contributor
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Elrond Hubbard
HA!
That just reminded me of the AD&D Dungeon Masters Adventure Log
It has a sample party, many of whom have clicheed names but there are a few real gems:
Dave Cook played Fred 9802
Jeff Leason played Harry Furryfoot
and Lawrence Schick played Elron Hubbard
Been DM ing 23 years and heres some Ive seen..
Rambo 1
Rambo 2
Rambo 3 ( These were in 1988 )
Purux the pure.
Omar the Omnicent.
Buthcer the Maniac.
Rarktor the Mighty.
STEVEN.
GOTH GOTH
Logan the Grogan...
Filchbatter. Sadly, I got it out of the PHB.
first character ever AD&D 1st ed
male dwarf fighter named "Zeek Glove" (it's all I could think of)
first character when I started playing AD&D again a few years later with a good group. Male human fighter prince named "Gluntar Magnor" no he was not a barbarian, and I had to keep reminding the rest of the party over and over since his name sounded "like a barbarian name"
shadowrun, a decker weretiger named "T-Grey"
wow im terrible with names
rofl
okay these are just the bad ones
oh I forgot my "hick" brujah in VTM named "Red Kneckerson" he had a ghouled black lab that went places with him in his pickup truck
shadowrun, a decker weretiger named "T-Grey"
At least it wasn't 'Tony'.
Wow, that's grrrrrrreat!
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Mimi Moonbeam--druid
Elrond Hubbard--elven ranger
Fistacleas Johnson....halfling wizard
and his twin who was named
Killacus Jones...the monk who never actually killed any one
Three I can think of off the top of may head:
Jamsu T Kerrik (name of a pirate captain I'd NPC'd, making him *sigh* "Captain Kerrik")
Spock (the name of a drow renegade I'd played in a campaign -- he didn't last long [for some reason, Lolth-worshipping drow didn't find the fact he'd named his tarantual familiar "Lolth" amusing])
Larry, Moe and Curley (Yes, I tried, for a session to NPC the Three Stooges as hireling rogues in the Expedition to the Ruins of Greyhawk -- it failed, and I replaced Messers Howard, Fine and Howard with a more conventional rogue)
In one game I played one player played a half-orc barbarian named Slice and called the barbarian's sword "Axe". The player ALWAYS played the Stupid half orc barbarian
Same game my sister played a druid named Rheista Twigling or Twiggy the nutcase hippy Druid with a bogun named Fred carrying a basket that held a waterfilled glass jar holding her animal companion a goldfish named Mittens Weird rather than stupid but it sort of fits here
In another game I played an elven cleric named Galadrien Kiirsatcia. I took the first name from the male elven leader in Civ 2: Test of Time's Fantasy game not realizing (having not read LotR at the time and having missed it in the movies) that the female elven leader's name was Galadriel but had I realized it I would have pointed out that Andrew is male name in English and Andrea is female one etc but game finished in a TPK before that came up and it isn't a bad name to my mind and I'd use it again
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Just an aside, I hate stupid names that take you from the emersion of the game.
One of my players has a human druid/monk grappling expert named Derf Baiter. His father was also a Baiter for the fishing boats but due to his sheer number of years doing it he became a master. Yes, a Master Baiter. I have to hear this 'joke' during every interaction between the Druid and an NPC as the Druid decides everyone needs to hear his history.
Blleeeeckkk.
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Just an aside, I hate stupid names that take you from the emersion of the game.
One of my players has a human druid/monk grappling expert named Derf Baiter. His father was also a Baiter for the fishing boats but due to his sheer number of years doing it he became a master. Yes, a Master Baiter. I have to hear this 'joke' during every interaction between the Druid and an NPC as the Druid decides everyone needs to hear his history.
Blleeeeckkk.
Heh heh....have him run into Onan the Barbarian.
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3.5-
We had some doozies in the early days. All four of these players didn't last long in our group.
Tobias Danceholic: CE gnome necromancer who was burned at the stake by angry townsfolk after a few sessions.
Master Bates: half-elf ranger. Killed by a roof collapse.
Stiggs: incredibly annoying miniature anthropomorphic raccoon. Drowned unceremoniously after being tossed off a galleon by an exasperated NPC.
The Great Shirar: variant goblinoid sorcerer. One game he fell asleep in someone's backpack in a forest. We ended up fighting a dire bear and accidentally burned most of the forest in the process. We later discovered his charred remains in the backpack by a scorched tree.
Pathfinder-
Mountain Dwarf: a...mountain dwarf... with a warhammer musket. Still with us. And his player actually characterizes him really well (his name is one he bestowed upon himself for reasons that would take a long time to explain)
Alias.
Just... Alias.
An inquisitor of Groetus by vocation, he ended up as a inq5/brd2/ftr2/brd2/rgr2/rog2/wiz2/bbn1/clr1.
He ended up taking Ydersius' skull through a gate to the Grinning Moon and hasn't been heard from since. I miss him...
In keeping with WFRP's tradition of characters with awful puns for names I present to you: Hans Solo: Reikland smuggler, captain of the Millenium Falchion. His partner the mutant ogre (furry hide) - Chewymints.
Let's see, we've had:
Apocalypto, Dwarf Fighter. The player had thought about calling him Apocalypse, but the movie Apocalypto had just come out and he liked that name better.
Lightning, Half-Elf Ranger. Apparently the player has used this as an online/video game identity forever and it was his first time playing tabletop.
Leon Demonico, Hellbred Fighter/Ranger. After Lightning died, he came back as Leon. For those unfamiliar with Hellbred, they were a 3.5 race of damned souls given a second chance to redeem themselves.
Jaxon Roqster, Half-Elf Bard. Roqster=Rock Star.
Cindy Smash, Elf Barbarian. This was Lightning's player's then girlfriend's character. Her name was Cindy.
Damien VonWolfencock, Human Rogue/Sorcerer/Assassin. Why this guy came up with that last name, I have no idea. But we all found it hilarious.
And most recently Wazzo Wizzo Wuzza Wacko, Gnome Bard. He talks to sticks.
First character I ever played was a fighter named Crusher. My brother has had pairs of Dwarven henchmen named Rack and Pinion, Block and Tackle, and Briggs and Stratton over the years.
Currently I have a guy playing a bard named Al-viz. A few years back I wanted to start an Egyptian themed campaign and one of the guys named his character Curtis Loew (from an old Lynyrd Skynyrd song, if you didn't know). I reminded him of the "flavor" of the setting so he changed it to Curtis Loew-tep. *sigh*
