, a job that consisted mostly of picking lice
off Jabba's the Hutt bloated fat body. This
pays well, but is dangerous and disgusting as
most jobs are. FX-7 the medical droid went
down into the Rancor pit with the other
broken droids, because it was fun to watch
them get scrapped, and then drilled by the
horny Rancor. Rancors dry hump droids, as everyone
knows, or maybe they didn't know, but they
they sure can eat a whole mess of
gundark penis, a rather odorous meat when cooked
in the salted fat of exhumed tauntaun corpses
by a rodian cook named Grodo. When the
Hutt's ordered food from him only, for they
were all drinking Colt 45. Works every time.
Wendy the Hutt, Jabba's mom, slithered out of
her pleasure chamber. A great hunger wretched her
as she started eating everyone in the room:
the Jedi kindergarteners ran screaming for their lives.
Sly Snootles and the Max Rebo Band tour
did lines of purified Nyborg off the bosoms
of a nubile Hutt named Ms. Bubbly Jubblies.
She was known for her wild parties lasting
for months, during which thousands of twi'lek dancers
showed it all to alien girls gone wild
the Nintendo Wii version. When you play it,
you gotta earn beads and baubles for naughty
twi'leks and rodians so that they'll show you
their tentacled genitalia and their Bob's Big Boy
sausage sized erect members. The Hutts had several
twelve inch Star Wars figures from the 70's
including the Princess Luke doll (I mean action
is good and all, but I figure a
warm blaster pistol is better than playing with
some cheesy version of an automated Artoo unit)
Jabba the Hutt rolled over and pulled out
a frog snack from beside his throne. "Tasty
jedi, you want some? It taste just like
kobold. I think their fear gives them a
flavor boost, as they empty their bowels just
like clockwork." Jabba then proceeded to roll around
like clockwork, and then decided to try to
eat some tofu stir fry, the kind with
little crunchy pieces of little crunchy Jedi younglings.
Yoda decided he'd had enough of Jabba's dining
abomination and pulled out a lightsaber, saying "Am
certain you will my diet idea enjoy." He
waved his erect lightsaber around in front of
Jabba, daring him to scarf the last cupcake.
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