Vladek Odradek's page

"What is really amazing, and frustrating, is mankind's habit of refusing to see the obvious and inevitable until it is there, and then muttering about unforeseen catastrophes."

― Isaac Asimov

Witchmen ("...I turned you into a newt 35 minutes ago.")

...or 7.

"Solidly APL 15", hmm (and 1-XP Scenarios, not 3-XP Modules)?
And such an interesting lineup of high mages, too...

...Blast it. You can count us in if you're okay with a party of 6.

Poppinheimer ("A Spoonful of Uranium Helps the Little Boy Go Down!")
Appenheimer (the story of the minds and personalities behind the "iPocalypse" [Intended Release Date: 2103])
Cloppenheimer (Rule 34 shows no mercy; Pony-related R34 even less)
Woppenheimer (The Super Mario Brothers finally decide their endless war with the Koopas must come to an end, by any means necessary)
Open Heiner ("Now I am become Goatse, Destroyer of Eyes....")

"I came to America because of the great, great freedom which I heard existed in this country. I made a mistake in selecting America as a land of freedom, a mistake I cannot repair in the balance of my lifetime."

― Albert Einstein

This is Vladek Odradek, sailing into the West....

Wowie-ZAPPO!

I hadn't counted on this being a Module.

"Perhaps staying silent is best on this matter. Position in society is more important than truth and I agree with Yuri that little is likely to be done to change the political order proof or not."

Vladek shoots the spirit a dark glare.

"Rokgurn, have a specialist look over your bird; it sounds as if certain of us may have felt Asmodeus's presence in that place more deeply than others...."

”Papa!” the two sisters cry as you enter the inn with them. They run to a very stunned father who clearly cannot believe his eyes. He looks to you, stuttering, ”H-h-how? Wh-where? I am forever in your debt!” He cries happily as he hugs his daughters tightly, blubbering loudly…

Vladek keeps his distance, but his countenance has changed dramatically.

He addresses the family with a gentle, but quite noticeable, smile. "What did I tell you?"

...as Vladek continues sculpting the belligerent soul's Tomb-Beyond-Time around him!

Make a DC 21 Will save or be staggered for up to 14 rounds.

Vladek, out of curiosity, how do you have access to Expend? It doesn't look like it's on the Witch list? (It would be a nice spell for my witch, which is why I ask).

Time. :)

Also of interest to some here, a Paizo union has been announced.

0.0 "We shall watch your career with great interest."

I wonder what their complaints are? Heaven knows I've had a few....

RE teleportation triangulation: I have a straight-up teleport memorized; we could've done it that way if necessary.

Reflex save vs fire, heroism: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (5) + 15 = 20
DM STAR REROLL!: 1d20 + 18 ⇒ (16) + 18 = 34

Is there...supposed to not be a current map?

Vladek semi-miraculously bolts out of the way of the worst of the hellfire in a momentary blur of surreal afterimages!

He counters with a nasty trick of his own, one he's never tried before - for not even ghosts and their magic are exempt from the ravages of Time!

DC 26, hopefully positioned so that nobody else gets affected.

I'm curious: Did my critical threat confirm?

Oh shoot, I forgot!:

Sonic damage #1: 1d6 ⇒ 6
Sonic damage #2: 1d6 ⇒ 1
Sonic damage #3: 1d6 ⇒ 2

...while (assuming something remarkable doesn't happen, see above) a magically-invigorated Vladek deems this a "Moment of Truth"-moment!

'Moment of Truth' (+1 Adaptive Holy Composite Longbow), heroism, hope, haste, Naturalist: 1d20 + 19 ⇒ (6) + 19 = 25
Good damage: 1d8 + 3 + 2d6 ⇒ (8) + 3 + (3, 6) = 20
if that misses, arrow can be recovered on low: 1d100 ⇒ 75

'Moment of Truth' (+1 Adaptive Holy Composite Longbow), heroism, hope, haste, Naturalist: 1d20 + 19 ⇒ (15) + 19 = 34
Good damage: 1d8 + 3 + 2d6 ⇒ (4) + 3 + (2, 4) = 13

'Moment of Truth' (+1 Adaptive Holy Composite Longbow), heroism, hope, haste, Naturalist: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (20) + 14 = 34
Good damage: 1d8 + 3 + 2d6 ⇒ (1) + 3 + (5, 1) = 10
Hot-dog, that is a THREAT!: 1d20 + 14 ⇒ (12) + 14 = 26
Critical Bonus?!?: 2d8 + 6 + 4d6 ⇒ (5, 7) + 6 + (3, 6, 6, 5) = 38 +10 = 48

Daathiel, could you please remind me what Naturalist is giving us?

Still could use an answer to this, please....

Mightn't we be forgetting the loss of 4 caster levels? Also, is that extra +4 concentration coming from Combat Casting, or whatever Alie just dispelled...?
EDIT: Mea culpa, then.

Fortitude save, heroism, hope: 1d20 + 11 ⇒ (19) + 11 = 30

Daathiel, could you please remind me what Naturalist is giving us?

Vladek doesn't seem that much the worse for wear, oddly (and perhaps eerily) enough...

Say, the Amazing Qadathra Twins DO still both have SR 19 to contend with!

Daathiel and Rokgurn: I don't know if it's "metagaming" to suggest this, but given that at least one of you saw inside before the rest of us did, might I suggest going after her with a dispel magic or the like?

Heck, at this level and against an enemy like this, trying to scour her with a dispel wouldn't be too bad an idea even if it were done blindly.

Not that it would've made the difference that time, but where is she getting that extra +4 to her saving throws?

Does that mean I don't need to bother with the Reflex save?

Also: Is our foe wearing any metal armor?

Vladek smiles, continuing to look directly at the medusa as if to rub his abjured eyes in her face, while raising a hand to his headdress to deftly palm his invisible Qadathra-clone, which he imbues with a curse before theatrically reopening his palm to release Other-Qadathra...

...who zips up and stings the curse into the monster with his (still inexplicably-) long scorpioid tail which is technically the Reach Eidolon Evolution courtesy of my Evolved Familiar feat, so I think it should still grant 5' reach despite his further-reduced size (and that's assuming the Rod of Wonder's shrinking effect DID carry over to Clone-Qadathra, otherwise that's moot anyway, although it would also reduce the attack roll below)...

bestow curse, haste, FineFUN-sized!: 1d20 + 19 ⇒ (17) + 19 = 36
CL vs SR: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (15) + 16 = 31

Vladek’s spell fizzles as it strikes the Medusa, unable to penetrate her spell resistance…

Shoot; in my haste to post before my weekly Internet-Shabbat, I mistook the hamatula stats for hers. :P

DM Star reroll, if I may?: 1d20 + 17 ⇒ (16) + 17 = 33

In other news: Uh-oh! I'll wait until I get your weal/woe on the above before continuing (at the very least, my successfully shriveling her should relieve us of a few of those damage dice [AND make it easier to dispel!])....

Simple and elegant, Vladek reflects approvingly as he witnesses Daathiel's handiwork; he'd had an idea or two for dealing with the hamatulae ('HamatulaS'? 'HamatulA'? 'HamatulI'? 'HamatulIM'? 'HamatulI' but pronounced 'eee' at the end??? Not THIS again...!), but this changes things a bit. He looks down at Alie and gives her a mischievous, knowing, mirror-eyed wink before moving forward in the blink of an eye...

..."No Time for pleasantries, I'm afraid!" He quips before and blasting their 'hostess' with a fractalizing ray of cosmic entropy!

ranged touch attack, heroism, hope, haste: 1d20 + 15 ⇒ (15) + 15 = 30
CL vs SR, Elven Magic: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (7) + 16 = 23
NEGATIVE LEVELS!: 1d4 ⇒ 4

When Yuri calls for his enlargement blessing, it calls attention to the fact that, once again, Vladek and Qadathra seem to have been missing for some time now...until who should reappear at the far end of the hallway - no wait, midway through but lagging well behind the rest o- no, RIGHT BEHIND Yuri when he turns around to look?

"...about Time this Tomb earned its name!" He utters at last as if it were only the second half of whatever he'd been saying.

Vladek goes through the motions of enlarging Yuri, then turns around and does the opposite to either Daathiel or Alie) (which of you would prefer it?)...

...then sweeps a graceful hand over whichever breastplate, helm, shield, sword, or axe-head we think this would be most useful on, leaving it polished to a perfect mirror-shine...

...then palms Mini-Qadathra like a coin, places the hand holding him together with his other with such speed that you momentarily fear for Qadathra's well-being - until he pulls his hands apart and turns his palms upward, revealing TWO Qadathras ('QadathraE'? 'QadathrIM'? 'Octathra'??? This is going to mildly bugger the backs of some of your brains for at least the rest of the day)!!!

He then moves forward at least long enough to ensure everyone's within 30 feet and takes out an hourglass (seeming to have a bit of a collection of such things), and twiddles it gracefully in one hand; you all hear the sound of slipping sandgrains, rather louder than you ought to, but you also notice that nothing seems to be reaching the bottom of Vladek's glass...then, you feel it: Your body feels lighter, intensely tingly, almost pins-and-needles to the point that you should double-over from the tickling for a moment before subsiding, and you are left with the bizarre sensation that you know what it feels like to be a fresh head of ale.

Finally, he focuses inward, closing his eyes which, upon re-opening, have similarly turned to perfect mirrors (all the more eerie on an elven face on which the eyes are already so dominant). He stares directly ahead at the doors, as if in impudent dare to what waits behind them.

"Look upon my works, ye mighty...shall we?"

Knowledge (Planes), heroism, hope, Scholar of the Gates Ajar: 1d20 + 33 ⇒ (17) + 33 = 50 Special weaknesses? Feats? Magic resistance? Potentially-exploitable personality quirks? Special senses?

Knowledge (Nature), heroism, hope: 1d20 + 21 ⇒ (7) + 21 = 28

Everyone bear in mind their lucky numbers!!!

”Could you tell us how to get out of here before you leave?”

"Why, I could get us out of here any time I wanted," Interjects Vladek as though finally passing beneath an air shaft out from deep within the labyrinthine pyramid of his own mind.

Since you mention it, I *do* have teleport prepared.

Vladek enters the room as a wiry blur against the wall; once there, he exploits the one weakness he knows of these entities, blasting them both with a mighty stroke of lightning!

So...If Rokgurn can cast spells into this room from where he is, can I do likewise?

Almost Internet-Shabbat-time, so getting this out of the way now:

Knowledge (Planes), Heroism: 1d20 + 29 ⇒ (10) + 29 = 39 Annoying. <_<

Alright, I'll be interested in special defenses and feats.

Satisfied that there weren't any traps, Jack moved along as well, signaling to his griffon to stay back a little. "I'm a fan of this course of action. Farabellus always said that real adventurers go left."

Vladek ponders this as he floats behind in near-silence. "If one always goes left, eventually one will wind up going in a circle."

Vladek re-appears from out of nowhere again shortly after the rest of you realize he's gone missing, and what appears at first glance to be an extraordinarily-detailed uraeus newly added to his headgear turns out to be Qadathra, still absurdly minuscule, now perched on his forehead.

They work a suite of wards and enchantments (mage armor and heroism for myself, and...).

greater false life on Qadathra: 2d10 + 14 ⇒ (1, 1) + 14 = 16 >:(

greater false life on myself: 2d10 + 14 ⇒ (3, 10) + 14 = 27

I assume it has still been less than 24 hours since I gave everyone their lucky numbers, so remember those...and Qadathra is still More-Fun-Than-Usual-sized!

Saw that just now, but see my edit. :)

I'm really thankful that our optimization level is generally moderate, and so this was an actual fight.

This is what I've never got about the way people talk about "optimization" - optimized FOR WHAT? Any character who'd been truly "optimized" for a fight like that would've been crippled in the face of any number of other challenges. Here's a good example.

ANYWAY: Okay, if Yuri's going to wish for another enlarge person, I feel the need to prepare a reduce person - would anyone in particular like that?

Is anyone trying to provide long-term care? It "counts as light activity for the healer", so how much benefit would whoever did it get from resting? Qadathra could do it if no one else will; it's been so long since that was even an issue.

You only gave Tim half the benefit for some reason....

...and Vladek looks at the tiny, TINY pitiful excuse for a dragon now rolling about in the palm of his hand like a cat on a king-sized mattress, his other hand balancing on his razor-thin hip.

"So, are you going back on my shoulder, or should I just keep you in the pouch with all the rest of my spell components?" He deadpans.

He does reach for his component pouch, but to pull out a small pellet of purest gold. Once everyone's reconvened closer to one another, Vladek attempts to 'rewind' their various grievous injuries.

mass cure light wounds, alchemical gold: 1d8 + 15 ⇒ (5) + 15 = 20

It would be so easy and fun to have a Witch Archetype/Alternate Class that forsook most of its normal spellcasting (the Medium's 0-4 spellcasting progression, maybe?) to focus on Hexes - and much truer to the 3.5 Warlock, too! Come to think of it, I really don't understand why Paizo never made such a thing....

Seeing the one he'd cursed fall, Vladek waits on pins and needles to do the same to her remaining sister-in-arms...

Still readying a Hex, but Retribution again!

@Jack: Want a reroll? Don't forget your Fortune!

@DM: I think they should both be 2 damage further along, since you forgot the power-component bonus to the last two scouring winds rolls.

@All: Don't forget your lucky numbers, either!

Vladek zips gingerly across the chamber and waits, poised like a mantis, for at least one of the devils to reveal themselves, that he may peer into her immediate future and work to thoroughly ruin it.

Readied Action: First devil to become visible again must make a DC 26 Will save or suffer 2 rounds of Misfortune.

When you rush around in hopeless circles,
Searching everywhere for something true,
You're at the Age of Not-Believing
When all the make-believe is through

You must face the Age of Not-Believing,
Doubting everything you ever knew,
Until at last you start believing
There's something wonderful in YOU!

Friendly Reminder(s): It's not a "black powder storm", per se...but that extra component I spent should make that last roll a '14'.

Vladek smiles in satisfaction (and schadenfreude) at his Art.

He could unmake many of the party's injuries, but to do so best might be - knowing what these devils are capable of - inviting much greater harm.

He opts instead, therefore, to get just close enough to Senator Blakros that he may weave his next few moments in the directions he would most desire...after all, rare is the senator with spine enough to fight on the front lines for his constituency!

Jack, you're getting today's 2 rounds of Fortune, now; use them wisely.

Fortitude save, good hope, Naturalist: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (19) + 12 = 31

Such is the paradox of Elven physiology - frail, yet immaculate in the face of centuries - that they do not 'wilt' easily, and Vladek weathers the deadly magic with relative aplomb.

He wills his unnatural grit-storm forward to re-engulf the one who had escaped...

scouring winds: 3d6 + 1 ⇒ (5, 2, 1) + 1 = 9

...but before he loses sight of her, works his signature Ourobouros Curse to bind her in a death-knot of her own causality!

Black Sabbath, make a DC 26 Will save or suffer 9 rounds of Retribution!

CL vs SR, Elven Magic, VS:
Black Sabbath: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (10) + 16 = 26
Pink Slime: 1d20 + 16 ⇒ (7) + 16 = 23
QAPLA'!

It's a tad frustrating: Had I even a clear hint that there would be this many Outsiders down here, I would've prepared a very different spell selection; I got all ready for Undead and Constructs (and to a lesser extent, actual Medusae and/or other petrifying foes), and while there's been some, it seems all of the most serious threats (problems that can literally just be danced away notwithstanding, I suppose) have all been various Evil Outsiders.

"Now you've done it," Says Vladek following his own ghastly croak as his skin cracks like a hard-boiled eggshell - actually, he seems to have weathered the dark magic surprisingly well, and seems more angered by what it's done to Qadathra. He gives the devils a grim, nasty smile.

"My turn."

From literally out of nowhere erupts a whirling storm of silvery grit, like the ravages of millennia concentrated into seconds and made manifest, consuming two of the devils!

scouring winds, black powder for +1 damage: 3d6 + 1 ⇒ (5, 4, 4) + 1 = 14

Will save, good hope, Naturalist: 1d20 + 17 ⇒ (9) + 17 = 26
Fortitude save, good hope, Naturalist: 1d20 + 12 ⇒ (13) + 12 = 25 Thank Goodness for those bonuses!

What am I, excessively marinated rooster-liver?

In addition to arguing that Daathiel is selling himself short by asking only for "immunities" and that resistances are normally included in that query as well, I'll take 'SR, Feats, and Special Weaknesses/Restrictions' for 999 gp, AlexKen.

His sister gave Micheaux a son, though she died in childbirth;

Admittedly, my knowledge of this sort of thing is very limited, but it would take what to prevent this sort of thing from happening in Golarion? A 3rd-level Cleric? 9th-level, at worst (something not available for everyone, but surely for near-halycon Taldan royalty)?

I get suspension of disbelief and all that, but good grief, at least mention that someone secretly put a fester curse on her or something (as a matter of fact, Taldor being the Land of Intrigue and all that, that could've been a totally neat detail - or even the starting point for a whole different Society adventure!).

The bastard son that Lucretia gave Micheaux became the future king of Taldor, Stavian I...hence a long disgraced and long thought extinct family's blood is still flowing through Taldan nobility...

DUNN DUNN DUNNNNNNNNN!

Vladek views the proceedings ('preceedings'???) in silent rapture (although he does chuckle a bit at the risible attempt at folk-divination - thrice-damned indeed is he who is cruel to innocent animals, surrenders to mindless rage over so little, and trusts in such mountebank's magic in the first place!)...

Fortitude Save: 1d20 + 7 ⇒ (16) + 7 = 23

...and to say that he "recovers" from the experience would imply that the many-seasoned chronomancer even feels there is anything to 'recover' FROM.

Pie-easy auto-success on that Knowledge check there...

Knowledge (Planes), Scholar of the Gates Ajar for further particular knowledge of these devils: 1d20 + 29 ⇒ (14) + 29 = 43

Hence, he is quite - almost alarmingly - prepared for what awaits upon their return to the Land of the Living.

"Oh, how predictable," Says Vladek at the sight, his voice indicating no fear but almost dripping with annoyance and disdain. "The Prince of Lies doesn't want the truth to escape its wrongful grave. Of course not." He addresses the devils directly (if they don't speak Common and he knows it, he'll try Celestial or Abyssal). "Well, when we send you back to The Pit, you may tell Him I said He can go to HEAVEN!!!"

If you don't mind, a condensed recap of what we just witnessed and its implications, please? I want to make certain I fully understand, OOC and in-; Vladek ought to be all over this blast-from-the-past.

DAMN THIS REAL-LIFE MYSTERY-AFFLICTION THAT SO INHIBITS MY ONCE-BRILLIANT MIND AND GIFTS AS A ROLEPLAYER...!

Pity to destroy such a masterpiece, thinks Vladek Odradek, renowned sculptor of Sothis, but as they say, some things were made to be broken!

He keeps his distance, and tries ornamenting the statue with a work of an even finer Art: His trademark Ourobouros Curse....

DC 26 Will save or get stuck with that for 9 rounds.

*shrug* I had another roll to make before the gong rang (so to speak), figured I'd wedge it in there.