Did somebody say the word "jack" in some unrelated context???
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Of course not. *Puts in Jackapult* This is for the weed exterminating liquid which you sprayed upon me many posts ago, unintelligent burglar!*Fires at poodle thread*
*sacrifices a virgin to Moorluck*But But I wanted that@! It would appear that Crimson Jester, once a significant force and leader of a thieves' guild, is now a--I gasp--cultist! You fools can not steal the Angry Jack's Cult's main source of power. We will destroy you all. It is possible, at any rate. We may tolerate you if we are provided with a tithe. But it is not in a Angry Jack's Cultist's way to be forgiving enough to avoid annihilating any who may or may not incur his/her wrath.
yanks finger Thank you very much for the fertilizer.
Easy Rusty, you will have a chance to feed soon enough. In the mean time why don't you snack on some of those old cans over there? Actually, many of us are made from ceramic, mostly, with only a few of us still resembling our original selves. None of us except Acme are metal, though.
"Listen, I might have done great harm to your daughter. I have given her second sight. At first, I thought I was giving her a gift...but then I realized just how young she is. I am very worried...that the Mask will try to seize the advantage on this."
"Oh. Well, I'm here now. What can I do for you, PlantJack?" "Ah, Lynora. I have a few messages for you. "First of all, you can trust Frost."Second, what do you mean, 'drama queen'?! I was simply protesting the injustice that you would not come to me in person!" He chuckles but presses on. "Third, I have heard rumors that you have given The Mask shelter, and that Frogskin has given him the same, but of...a different nature. Lynora, this is folly. He is a trickster, and he is still the foul creature who animated the dead servants of Calistria. You know as well as I do that your wards do not block evil creatures, but those who mean harm to others within. Why do you think he possessed Frogskin? I believe it may confuse the wards just enough to get in there, as long as Frogskin remains innocent. "Fourth: I am worried that he will not. He has not slept in ages, the Mask barely kept under his skin. It's only a matter of time before he cracks, and it is my belief that in such a case, he will be in the most danger. From the Mask...and from Jack Hammer and the others. "Fifth...Lynora, I truly am sorry about this. I wonder if it was the right decision at times." He seems hesitant to continue.
Lilsa is silent for a moment. She closes her brown eyes. When she reopens them, they are bright green.
What slaad? Angel of Violence is a Jill, as is LJ. ??? What? that is not Angel of Violence! That is the stupid Bunny slaad thingy! Yes, actually. Hungry Jack cooking. It doesn't even need to degrade, it starts out that way!
That is ni--WAIT A MINUTE! Why did the slaad get on there and I did not?! *Glares*Figures, you leave for a little while and EVERYBODY forgets about you....
She hears a voice in her head, more like a memory.
A glowing green orb flies into the Eyrie. It stands outside the door to Lynora's room. It does not. It zooms towards Arielle, and flies right in front of her forehead. it touches it, and vanishes. Spoiler:
A glowing green orb flies into the Eyrie. It stands outside the door to Lynora's room.
Plantjack feels a chill. "Arielle, I think it best you get out of here soon. The Weedwhacker is near. My soul can be saved by incarnum. That is the only way I know of, and only a god--or one who knows certain secrets of the gods--can give me enough incarnum to help. I am like a swarm of bees, trapped in a jar. I can only be saved if I have a bigger jar. They must cast the incarnum harvested with their knowledge to Plant of the Ch'acks. It will find me. Please, this is my last chance. Now go!"
"Yep, she does. I'm Arielle. And I think mom is busy with something right now. She's not a telephone service, you know. Anyways, here I am, so if you have something you need to communicate go right ahead." "I need help. My soul will fade back into the ether as soon as this dream ends. It came into existence here, as an act of pity by the Boardmother perhaps, but only for a short time. Arielle, I do not want to fade. I want an afterlife. My soul can be saved, but only with the help of Lynora or another who has known the power of a god. Other than your mother, though, I know of no such individual who will help. Do you?"
Plantjack--no, just Plant now--searches his memories. Finally, he decides on a desperate attempt to reach Lynora's friends, particularly those who have a bond with her. He can only pray it works. For now, though, all he can do is rest, and try to regain his strength. He'll need it. Plant looks offended. "I was not being a 'drama queen'. I needed somebody to communicate through. Who the hell are you? Mom?? Don't tell me Lynora has a daughter!"
Plantjack--no, just Plant now--searches his memories. Finally, he decides on a desperate attempt to reach Lynora's friends, particularly those who have a bond with her. He can only pray it works. For now, though, all he can do is rest, and try to regain his strength. He'll need it.
The plant weeps.
:Unless it involves the universe ending, go away. I'm not in the mood to hear it right now.: "Dammit! This is no time for stubbornness! I have very little tim--" The voice fades.
Suddenly, there is a faint voice in Lynora's mind.
A plant stirs in the dawn light. Two glowing eyes form, as it begins moving.
You have to bring up spiders. I hate spiders. The more legs it has, the less I like it. That sometimes starts at 2. When we get to 8, it's far too late. Yoink! *Comes in and swallows Ambrosia Slaad*It is no longer a danger, Jacks.
Indeed. Is everything being alright? It is quite different since I had left.
Not to mention myself. They failed to punt me out do to my roots. I am going to depart now, though. I am tired of all this. the beer poisoners have been punished, and that is enough.*Leaves*
*casts disintegrate on VTPJ* That provokes an attack of opprotunity, Dick Cheney. *Smacks former VP. Spell fails*
You'll never get through my turn resistance. But that kinda hurt when you hit me in the head. You shouldn't hit people.*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ**Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries* *Holds jug of holy water* Back! Back!
*mercenaries set fire to VTPJ**Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries* I am immune. I am a golem, do you remember?
*Thorny roots spring up from the ground and strangle the mercenaries*
I told you you wouldn't like it when I'm angry. Oh sh**. This raid is going sour.
You're making me angry. And you won't like me when I'm angry. *Tosses slaad again* There are a lot of walls here. And I think I shall like your anger a great deal. This is boring.
That is too bad. *Picks up slaad in vines and throws him at convenient wall*I am back! Did anybody miss me?I didn't. We were here first, you morons. You're becoming us. Or are you corrupted versions of us or suchwhat? It is difficult to be certain. *Throws against wall again*
I am back! Did anybody miss me?I didn't. That is too bad. *Picks up slaad in vines and throws him at convenient wall*
*Suddenly, in an old forest, miles away, a call is heard...a call that there is poisonous beer. This call enrages our hero, who flies in through the planes to save the day, and the skunk...* SUPER PLANTJACK!*Removes poison from Jackskunk and smashes beers* I am back! Did anybody miss me?
Within the World Tree, LJ wanders. No more dancing with stars and feeling the power of the universe as it moves. Here she was just herself, alone. There are many worlds that connect here, but she can only look at them from afar, stuck within the tree itself where she chose to fasten her life force until she either dies for good or is called back to the living world. Lynora feels a presence nearby her.
"Well played. But the Board is friend to you no longer."
Innocent Blood notices this new threat and shoots a green glowing bolt of energy at the elder air elemental. Then she sees that Plantjack has arrived. He glares at her. "Too long have you threatened us. You broke Rio's heart, you broke Alaina's mind, you broke so many bodies. But no longer."He pulls out the disk. "Feel the wrath of flame." A bit of flame shoots from the cleaver into the disk. It starts glowing bright orange. "Feel the strength of earth." The disk turns into stone. "Feel the determination of wind." A hole appears in the disk, which winds rush through. "Feel the eternity of water." The disk becomes wet to the touch. "Feel the wisdom of Board Essence." The stone begins floating in the air. "Feel the power of Incarnum!" Plantjack shouts. The disk becomes ethereal. Plantjack begins fading. "From my own soul..." Plantjack disappears. "." The stone flies at Innocent Blood, and attaches itself to her. She feels pain, pain the likes of which she hasn't felt since she died. The disk will not come off. She feels her power over Board Essence slipping away, until she hardly has any left. "Finally...."
Plantjack appears. "Finally."He grabs a small wooden disk and sighs. "Finally." He grabs something out of his pack. The Cleaver! But it looks weak, mostly dormant. While the disk glows with life. "Goodbye. My affairs are in order." He charges straight at Innocent Blood, blasting all in his way.
Plantjack gasps. "Thank you. I really have to go."He vanishes, with some difficulty.
Plantjack leaps back in horror, causing him to lose his grip and fall. "YouAAAUG!
Plantjack sighs. "Well, you see, before the Jacks...captured him, Joe was. He was utterly incompetent, though, and only became a leader because of Meepo's and Esmerelda's interference. Back then, they were highly respected Protectors. After Joe was elected, though, everyone realized their mistake. We didn't even like to talk about him to people. It's his fault that the Servants are dying out. But it couldn't be him."
"No!" Plantjack says urgently. "Kobold Cleaver knew that. He's not in charge of the Servants. Somebody else must have put him in that position. You can't leave the Servants.""PlantJack, there is always a choice, no matter how unpleasant. But who precisely would have been in a position to disband the protectors and empower a group that strengthens Innocent Blood's goals?" "It doesn't support them. It's a complex branch, but really they all just believe that the ends justify the means. If they stop someone from taking over, even if they use Black magic, it's all still good, from their point of view. Even if innocents die. "And I don't know who. We had an old leader, but...no, it couldn't be him."
]"The Protectors of teh Board has been disbanded. Kobold Cleaver has been moved to the Blackguards. They're an almost dead branch of people who use the Black's magic to protect the Board. Most of us dislike talking about them."She shakes her head sadly. "Foolish kobold. I tried to tell him. I offered to help him. You cannot use the powers of unlife in order to protect life. I fear he is lost to us for good this time." "No!" Plantjack says urgently. "Kobold Cleaver knew that. He's not in charge of the Servants. Somebody else must have put him in that position. You can't leave the Servants."
"Now, bear in mind that it is quite possibly untrue...but he has been a bit cynical lately....""Just tell me, PlantJack. Your mention of cynical leads me to believe that you speak of the kobold. What has he done?" "The Protectors of teh Board has been disbanded. Kobold Cleaver has been moved to the Blackguards. They're an almost dead branch of people who use the Black's magic to protect the Board. Most of us dislike talking about them."
"Now, bear in mind that it is quite possibly untrue...but he has been a bit cynical lately...."
Plantjack comes in. It looks like he's struggling, holding onto one of the nests.
Plantjack takes a step back. Then, he turns to the two intruders. "Get. Out."
Plantjack appears. "Really, this is beginning to get annoying. Create your own home, this is not for you. Please depart, I'm, not in the mood for a fight. Really, I'm growing sick of guarding this place."
"Indeed I am. Aren't you that goblin who serves the 8th Runelord?" "Thank you, Auruns. This is most helpful." Plantjack seems to smile, though it's hard to tell on a plant.
I would be wary, if I were you.""I have nothing to fear from Aidan." "It isn't that. Champions are in constant danger. Especially since the Tsar likely wants his job back. Be careful. Or--Aidan meeds protection."
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