The Angry Jack Cult


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Robby the Robot wrote:

Returns Jacks to the thread.

Gentlemen, please stop playing with the communications device. I am returning you to your thread, as most of you do not seem to be up to a roadtrip, anymore. I have never heard such complaints about my driving. The master will have to find other recipients for his offer.

clicking and whirling.

Sorry, Robby. Didn't complain about your driving. I like fast. Fast is good.

But that synthetic beer! We really need Panama Jack to assist your programmer. He has a great sense of taste.

As for all the AWOL Jacks. Too bad. They lost out.

Here, take this copy of PlayBot for the trip back. Acme's scanned all the good parts.


Jack Hammer wrote:


Sorry, Robby. Didn't complain about your driving. I like fast. Fast is good.

But that synthetic beer! We really need Panama Jack to assist your programmer. He has a great sense of taste.

As for all the AWOL Jacks. Too bad. They lost out.

Here, take this copy of PlayBot for the trip back. Acme's scanned all the good parts.

"Oh, hi. You're back." She says weakly in between coughs. "Wow, that burns."


lynora-Jill wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:


Sorry, Robby. Didn't complain about your driving. I like fast. Fast is good.

But that synthetic beer! We really need Panama Jack to assist your programmer. He has a great sense of taste.

As for all the AWOL Jacks. Too bad. They lost out.

Here, take this copy of PlayBot for the trip back. Acme's scanned all the good parts.

"Oh, hi. You're back." She says weakly in between coughs. "Wow, that burns."

"Hi. Go down the wrong pipe?"

"You should really take a ride in Robby's transport. It blows away that Corvette."


Jack Hammer wrote:

"Hi. Go down the wrong pipe?"

"You should really take a ride in Robby's transport. It blows away that Corvette."

"But it's such a pretty corvette. And Spike likes hanging his heads out the window. Well, actually he wasn't really a fan after the first few turns. I'm pretty sure he thinks I drive too fast. Robby's transport goes faster than that?" she asked sizing it up. "I mean, it's not much to look at, but...."

"Do you think he'd let me drive?"


Intriguing. I must observe this sector closer. We may have to consider skipping syndication and going straight to primetime with it. This is better than Baywatch.


Grrrr!!!!


Easy Rusty, you will have a chance to feed soon enough. In the mean time why don't you snack on some of those old cans over there?


Borg Chachi wrote:
Intriguing. I must observe this sector closer. We may have to consider skipping syndication and going straight to primetime with it. This is better than Baywatch.

"Thanks, uh, I think."

:P


Borg Chachi wrote:
Intriguing. I must observe this sector closer. We may have to consider skipping syndication and going straight to primetime with it. This is better than Baywatch.

I thought this guy would be fixated on Joanie from Happy Days


Borg Chachi wrote:
Easy Rusty, you will have a chance to feed soon enough. In the mean time why don't you snack on some of those old cans over there?

Actually, many of us are made from ceramic, mostly, with only a few of us still resembling our original selves. None of us except Acme are metal, though.


Very Tempermental PlantJack wrote:
Borg Chachi wrote:
Easy Rusty, you will have a chance to feed soon enough. In the mean time why don't you snack on some of those old cans over there?
Actually, many of us are made from ceramic, mostly, with only a few of us still resembling our original selves. None of us except Acme are metal, though.

And no snacking on Acme! We like him. He brings us drinks. :)


Clearly further analysis is required.


Rusty the Borg Drone wrote:
Grrrr!!!!

Hands Rusty a whole-wheat dinner roll.

There ya go.


Puffy the Dinner Roll wrote:
Rusty the Borg Drone wrote:
Grrrr!!!!

Hands Rusty a whole-wheat dinner roll.

There ya go.

Just don't tell him that blood has iron in it!


Salty Jack wrote:
Just don't tell him that blood has iron in it!

Then you better hope he is just a rust monster and not a rust lord.

Dark Archive

Happy Day Before Erik Mona Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


David Fryer wrote:
Happy Day Before Erik Mona Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Known henceforth as Gary Teter Day!

Tastes Great! Less Filling!


Salty Jack wrote:
Puffy the Dinner Roll wrote:
Rusty the Borg Drone wrote:
Grrrr!!!!

Hands Rusty a whole-wheat dinner roll.

There ya go.

Just don't tell him that blood has iron in it!

I promise not to tell. Here have a dinner roll.


David Fryer wrote:
Happy Day Before Erik Mona Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Erik Mona Day isn't for a few months. It starts November 8th.


Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Erik Mona Day isn't for a few months. It starts November 8th.

{teleports in} Oh JOY! There you are KC!!!

{does Happy Happy Joy Joy song and dance} Kobie, where are you! The Magnificent One is here!

{hands over a present to Kobold Cleaver} Here you go! I knitted you a pair of sockies from my spider silk! SQUEEEEE!


Wolfie, KC's #2 Buddy wrote:
Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Erik Mona Day isn't for a few months. It starts November 8th.

{teleports in} Oh JOY! There you are KC!!!

{does Happy Happy Joy Joy song and dance} Kobie, where are you! The Magnificent One is here!

{hands over a present to Kobold Cleaver} Here you go! I knitted you a pair of sockies from my spider silk! SQUEEEEE!

Gah! *Drops socks and runs*


Kobold Cleaver wrote:
Gah! *Drops socks and runs*

Come baaaaaaaaaack! {attempts to follow but finds he accidently glued himself to floor with stray webbing, struggles to cut it with claws} I'm coming! Wait for me!

Sorry about the socks! I knew I should've dyed them a nice color instead of leaving them pale grey.


Anybody home?


Huh? Whuzzat?


Hey! Finally someone to pull my finger. This fart's been stuck for weeks!

Anybody?


yanks finger


Its really odd to find the clubhouse so iddle....sometimes you can find over 100 posts on a single day...

*farts*

I'm self sufficient, no finger-pulling required


Malice Jack wrote:
yanks finger

BBBRRRRRRRRAAAPPPPPPP!

Oh, lumpy.

Thanks!


Dude! Go clean yer armor!


Jack Hammer wrote:
Malice Jack wrote:
yanks finger

BBBRRRRRRRRAAAPPPPPPP!

Oh, lumpy.

Thanks!

Gross!

HUUUUUURRRRLLLL!!!


The Hurl of Sandwich wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Malice Jack wrote:
yanks finger

BBBRRRRRRRRAAAPPPPPPP!

Oh, lumpy.

Thanks!

Gross!

HUUUUUURRRRLLLL!!!

Who the heck are you?

*punts stranger*


Jack Hammer wrote:
The Hurl of Sandwich wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Malice Jack wrote:
yanks finger

BBBRRRRRRRRAAAPPPPPPP!

Oh, lumpy.

Thanks!

Gross!

HUUUUUURRRRLLLL!!!

Who the heck are you?

*punts stranger*

I get air....sick.....

UUUUURRRRRPPP!


The Hurl of Sandwich wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
The Hurl of Sandwich wrote:
Jack Hammer wrote:
Malice Jack wrote:
yanks finger

BBBRRRRRRRRAAAPPPPPPP!

Oh, lumpy.

Thanks!

Gross!

HUUUUUURRRRLLLL!!!

Who the heck are you?

*punts stranger*

I get air....sick.....

UUUUURRRRRPPP!

Thank you very much for the fertilizer.


Wanders around the thread looking at all the unfinished projects.

Not like Cousin Panama to let his crew disappear before things got done.


Pretends he's conducting a tour

And outside this window we have a large stone monument of Callous Jack, our leader. It is said that women swoon whenever they see it.

Next we have this kickin' kitchen, but our resident chef has run off. Still we have enough Hungry Jack products in the pantry to last a hundred years.

Those peasants on the roof are playing four-square on the helipad.

What's that? Peasants on the helipad? *grabs a baseball bat and runs to the roof*


*turns on the Jack Jumbotron*

Who left this playing Days of Our Lives?

*switches to Cops


Not realizing that he is not watching Cops, but actually watching the closed circuit feed to the helipad, Salty enjoys watching the peasants scattering before the swings of the General's bat.

He helps himself to some nachos and freshens his rum, and settles down for the show


Babe Ruth taught me this one! *smacks peasant*

Chuck Norris taught me this one! *roundhouses peasant*

Learned this one when I was with the Lions. Lots of punting with that team! *punts peasant*

Saw this on Deliverance. *4th peasant runs away, screaming in terror*

Hmm...guess I didn't need the hunting bow.


General J. Debauchery wrote:

Babe Ruth taught me this one! *smacks peasant*

Chuck Norris taught me this one! *roundhouses peasant*

Learned this one when I was with the Lions. Lots of punting with that team! *punts peasant*

Saw this on Deliverance. *4th peasant runs away, screaming in terror*

Hmm...guess I didn't need the hunting bow.

*smacks a few peasants around* Ah, feels like old times.


*pulls out foldable chair and beer and watches JRHM smack peaseants around*

goodol' times


Where have all the good peasants gone? These barely have any meat on 'em.


General J. Debauchery wrote:
Where have all the good peasants gone? These barely have any meat on 'em.

Back in the day we'd just pull into port and round up fresh batches of 'em. Very handy for chumming the water when you're trolling for shark.


General J. Debauchery wrote:
Where have all the good peasants gone? These barely have any meat on 'em.

It's probably because we don't feed them.


Lets feed them to the poodles!


Frat Jack wrote:
Lets feed them to the poodles!

Let's feed the poodles to them!


General J. Debauchery wrote:
Frat Jack wrote:
Lets feed them to the poodles!
Let's feed the poodles to them!

YIPE!


General J. Debauchery wrote:
Frat Jack wrote:
Lets feed them to the poodles!
Let's feed the poodles to them!

I like the 1st suggestion better!

GRRRRR!


Peasants taste good with honey mustard!

Yap yap


You're all a bunch of fascists, I'll have you know!


Anarcho-Syndicalist Peasant wrote:
You're all a bunch of fascists, I'll have you know!

Get him, poodles!

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